Hey, I'm a simple girl who just loves writing for myself. My fanfics are just maladaptive daydreams that turns to long winded books, I hope you enjoy some of my works despite being thoroughly self indulgent.
I ain't a wimp when I get writers block I STRESS ABOUT IT FOR A WEEK STRAIGHT, and not to ChatGPT like a coward. I face writers block like a man, laying in bed hours crying.
my friend hates her mother's evil cat so much and wants him to die and im just now finding out his name is tubby pumpkin 😭 like bro why do u have beef with tubby pumpkin
Got reminded again of my old coworker who was a massive misogynist but also trans inclusive. Told me he believed trans women are indeed women because "only women would be stupid enough to want to be women"
He also aggressively corrected himself whenever he accidentally misgendered a trans guy we knew because "there's already more women than men in the world, the more numbers we steal from them, the better." Did that even when the trans guy wasn't around.
I need to point out that he was completely serious btw. This man had no sense of humor if he tried.
He was a cook at the restaurant/bar I was a bartender at, and almost punched a costumer once because he overheard him talking about how women belong in the kitchen. Told me he thought women should stay out of kitchens, that cooking is a man's job and when I asked him what he thinks women should be doing, he went quiet for a moment, then proceeded to explain to me the following
"I trust a bitch to run a kitchen as much as she can run a country, they should do shit like plumbing. Or electricity. Something you can just learn to do and don't need to lead, you know?"
Apparently women are good at "fixing shit". He claimed that he doesn't trust male plumbers or electricians except if they're gay because "something most be wrong with you if you want to go fix other people's houses, that's that maternal instinct"
Love that you guys seem to like the stories about my Guy, here's another. (also for context i need to say that english is not the language he spoke, and when i say 'fag', i'm using it for our version of the slur. Our Guy insisted that that's just how you call gay people in our language (it isn't))
We had an openly gay coworker who looked like it (crop tops, dyed hair, make-up) and he was often harassed by the waiters from the football bar next door. The gay dude had the same name as the Guy, who insisted that we would specify the he isn't gay, so they just became "Name" and "Not Gay Name". He was fine with that.
Oh he also once went on a rant about how he respects our gay coworker more than "those other fags" because "at least he has the balls to look like a fag, yknow? None of that sneaky shit where you can't tell if they're trying to fuck you or your girlfriend." When I then told him I was bi, he looked me over and called me some slurs before telling me that I don't need to rub it in that I can get both. Then he asked me if I think he's hot and when I told him no, he informed me I should stick with women because I clearly have shit taste.
He once accidentally bullied one of our younger waitresses out of an early eating disorder she was developing before working there (she told me about it after)
Boss gave us one meal from the menu a day as a job bonus, and we had this very shy seventeen year old working with us who was already nervous around men, but Our Guy was a 6'3 dude who only stopped yelling and cursing when he was not speaking at all. If he was the one cooking that day, he'd peek out of the kitchen an hour before he'd start closing it up, and would shout at you if you haven't ordered your meal yet because he hated cooking once he already cleaned. The waitress was scared shitless of him, and so whenever he would yell at her to "fucking order already", she'd panic and just pick something.
She didn't eat much but the first time she tried to throw out almost the whole plate, he got so personally insulted that he berated her for not picking something she'd like, and demanded to know what he did wrong. He got really upset about apparently not being able to cook something that this kid would like and I'm pretty sure he started putting in extra effort to make sure she would eat it this time? It lead to him quite literally standing over her like a hawk when she ate to "see her reaction" and demand an immediate review to see what he can improve.
She later told me that it she was so scared and awkward around him back then that it kind of overrode her fear of food, and that she still sometimes pretends she's back there, when she feels a bad episode coming on, so. He did do something good for the world i guess
Our Guy met a nonbinary person once when my friend came to visit me at work. He was just on a smoke break so I had to introduce them and when I said "They're visiting" he got confused and asked us how many people are there (and then threatened murder if they dare order something while he's on a break). I had to explain this man what a nonbinary person is, he thought about it for a second, called the whole thing "fucking stupid, there ain't that shit in nature" and then proceeded to very mockingly refer to them as (our language equivalent of) "your majesty" and use the pronouns you use for people you're supposed to respect (which is genderless and very formal)
My friend thought he was really funny before I explained to them that I'm pretty sure he thought he was being mean (but hey he it wasn't misgendering so yay)
Then (after his break) they ordered a vegan sandwich and we heard him cussing them out about how "they should pick a fucking struggle". Later I asked him about it and got told that "how much shit can you deny yourself? Cheese, gender, the fuck's next?"
I like how his issue isn't with the "that shit ain't in nature" thing he mentioned, but the idea that being nonbinary is some form of self-deprivation and that they deserve a gender like everyone else.
Tags : One sided Enemies to friends. Slight Angst.
Satoru Gojo believes he's the only one that has an ability to see the facade behind Y/n's personality.
Words : 11K
When Satoru offers up his father’s huge ranch house in the countryside during spring break,he never expected Y/n to tag along for the trip.Or for him to be her unwanted chaperone from the university to there. Or for sudden complications to arise with Ieiri’s shitty car (that he begged her to finally let go of) to force them to be in the enclosed space that is Satoru’s Ford Ranger alongside her.
“Y/n is all alone for the holidays and the tickets to travel back to her country are both expensive and unnecessary. You understand right?”she pouted.
They don’t hate each other.Or at least from what Satoru is aware of, they don’t have any viable reason to be anything less than cordial.God Almighty doesn’t he just despise the word cordial to describe their current situation.
She fell onto Ieiri’s lap in one ethics class after she,according to the latter, ripped her a new one when they were talking about the politics of artists and former,a raging lesbian with a penchant for bossy and opinionated women,ended up getting into a situationship that resulted to an amicable break.So amicable actually that Y/n ended up barging in on their trifecta which last time he checked meant a group of only THREE.
At first, Satoru was nonplussed believing that she was one of those people who stuck around for a few weeks before finding her own pack and drifting away becoming mere acquaintances that sometimes smiled at each other when they crossed paths.But a few weeks turned to months and like a creeping vine she had managed to have snagged both Ieiri and Suguru into her clutches.
Friday movie nights couldn’t start at seven because “Y/n has a class at six and would be sad to have missed half the movie”. Sudden midnight snack runs had to add at least a couple of fruits cause “Y/n can’t eat too much sugar,she easily gets cavities” and even basic conversations couldn’t manage to not add another titbit about our “darling Y/n” who was a prefect back in her posh boarding school or that she won the national spelling bee in her country when she was only five years old. Y/n, Y/n, Y/n , and throughout all this they couldn’t have mentioned that Y/n didn’t even know how to fucking drive.
He took it with stride,at least that is what he believes considering they haven’t paid him an ounce of attention ever since miss perfect princess arrived ,feeding them by the palms of her hands . He bit his tongue whenever a retort was about to fly out of his lips and so he can admit that he is cordial,so damn cordial in fact that he’s willingly taking her to his sanctuary for the holidays,on his own,without them buffering any engagement until further notice.
He just can’t stand it.The artificial facade that she has mounted as an actual personality . He’s never seen her crack,frankly you’d be hard pressed to find anything that isn't a sweet smile on her face.She’s always bringing over a sweet treat whenever she’s over at anyone’s house . If you’re invited to her own house, she'll lay out a grand feast that you might wonder how it's even possible in her studio apartment that barely has a kitchen. Always knitting something for someone.Reads everyone perfectly well to understand what they like and not like almost as though she has a journal that has every single interaction and interests that people may say in passing written down.
Moreover,she seems to be known by almost everyone and equally loved. A professor always has a kind word about her,her classmates and even the fucking frat guys have nothing but nice things to say about her.The same frat guys who are so misogynistic their sorority sisters have ceased all collaborative events with them.
How in God’s green earth has she managed to snag all those people’s hearts in less than a year of immigrating to the country?It’s like the morning fog back home,except if the morning fog always smells like vanilla and cinnamon and whispers nothing but kind things to your ears.
Even thinking about the possibility of only being with her for the holidays has him weary.
She sits at the front and offers a polite hello. Her milkmaid dress does little to cover up her thighs and the ever sacrificing Satoru places his jacket atop of her dress.
“Thank you” She sweetly responds.He grunts.
“Okay we’re leaving.Text me for any progress and for god's sake Shoko you either buy a new car or get a rental between the next two days or I’mma have to haul your ass.” Satoru sneered
“Ay Ay Capt’in . Take great care of the young lady you have on the front seat , She’s a keeper” Shoko jests with the same twang Satoru insists he doesn’t have.
“Oh fuck off!” And he starts the long long journey back to his father’s .He adjusts the heater for the sake of the dame on his left and before she can stutter another thanks he stops her.
“You don’t need to thank me for everything. It's simple Southern hospitality.”What a polite lass he has as his passenger.
Having absolutely nothing to do and Satoru's disinterest in speaking to her instead intent on listening to whatever local radio is available at the time,she takes out her entertainment pouch and begins knitting. Her current interest is creating a blanket for her reading nook.
Hours pass in silence and just as she’s about to reach the middle portion of the blanket,they stop at a gas station.
“You’re hungry?Let’s go.The diner here has decent enough food.”Satoru states indifferently and without another word she leaves her project. She’s about to hand him his jacket back before he simply shakes his head before getting another spare from his small suitcase.
The roadside diner seems undisturbed from the contemporary elements of the 21st century. From the blockbuster posters to the checkerboard interior with the standard red booths,Y/n is drawn back to her times back home where her cinephile grandma would force her into watching all her favourite American shows and movies with teenagers having an ice cream at these exact places. She snaps some pictures before sharing them to the family group chat and to Ieiri who replies almost immediately,
Ieiri : He hasn't bitten your head off? That’s a new world record.
Ieiri : Suguru said he’s surprised he decided to feed you anything .
Y/n : He’s been nothing but polite the entire time.
Ieiri : If polite you mean stewing in his anger, sure.
Y/n: I mean I haven’t noticed any signs of anger?
“Aren’t you going to order?”Satoru grumpily questions as she notices they are closer to the counter,peeking to see who she’s smiling at on her phone.
“Oh! I’m sorry.I’m not very good at ordering in places I’m unfamiliar with. What do you recommend ?”She innocently asks whilst tucking her phone away.
“What do you prefer to eat?”
“I usually go with the safest option which is fries and chicken or steak.”
“I wouldn’t prefer you go for gas station meat considering that the journey is still a long while ahead but their sunny side up is good”he suggests whilst perusing through their menu with lightning speed.
“Okay then,I’ll have a sunny side up with fries please.”Before she can take out her wallet,he quickly orders for them and pays the tab.
“Thank-”
“Southern hospitality doll.Nothing more.” They are directed to a secluded booth and handed their drink of choice. For Satoru a coke floatie and for the “miss” juice.
“I’m sorry but before you can drink,can I take a picture?My family loves these types of drinks and they don't have them back home.” And instead of muttering a sarcastic response,he obliges and allows her to snap as many as she pleases.
They sit in silence,munching when their food comes by.Y/n notices the burly rednecks and those in heavy biker aesthetic that she usually isn't able to see in the city. The locals here seem to be well acquainted with the restaurant and the customers and before she can stop herself she asks,
“Do you always come here?”
“It’s a fairly known stop. My dad introduced me to it.”
‘The first glimpse into Satoru’s world’,she thinks absentmindedly.She’s well aware that he isn't her biggest fan.Unlike Suguru and Ieiri who took her in almost like an abandoned puppy left at their doorstep,Satoru never seemed eager to enrol her into the friend group. It stung at first,to be blatantly ignored,to first come to the realisation that not everyone will like you.
Because honestly it's a bit ridiculous to find any faults in her. She’s the girl next door archetype to a capital T. She’s kind to people,always willing to lend a helping hand,she dresses sweetly and has a soft lilt to her voice that she perfected over the years that makes anyone swoon. Who wouldn’t like her? Even as she aggressively cuts into her egg, watching the yolk drip down to her fries.she’s heated . She can’t even tell him a full show of appreciation without the fucker brushing it off.Why doesn’t he like her? And why does she care so much? why? Why? WHY!?
By the time she’s done stewing in her own river of red hot fiery rage all that's left is a deep dark pool of cold grief.She’s worked hard to get people to like her. Is it because she’s black??
No cause his friends outside Suguru and Ieiri are largely black.And if this is him,imagine his father.Will he stare at her with the same blank stare he gives her?Will he look close to scoffing whenever she mentions anything. By the time they get back into the car her heart seems close to bursting,her lungs breathless and she has to pretend to be drowsy and place a sleep mask on her eyes for fear of seeing the shallow basin of tears underneath her eyes.
***
Satoru notices the shift in her demeanor almost immediately after they leave the gas station.Maybe being full really made her drowsy but he notices the subtle pout on her face and his mind recaps the previous hour to the very second.Did he seem colder than usual? Was he rude about anything? But no matter how he looks into the situation he did nothing out of the ordinary.
Maybe she’s really just tired.
What he’s pleased about is that he made it just in time before the sunset. The setting sun offers a stunning display of a pinkish orange sky ovenearth rows and rows of the beautiful green plains now filled with wild daffodils . As the car silently halts right at the driveway of the main house,she stirs awake.
“I’m sorry for sleeping throughout.” She yawns with a droopy smile.
“It wouldn't have mattered.”He stutters out and her face almost falls which makes him sound like a douchebag but before he can clarify,as his father forcefully opens his door.
“You certainly know how to take your time huh lil’ sissy. I’ve been waiting for ages.”His father sputters out.
“Unlike you,I actually follow the laws of the land.” He bites back with little venom in his tone.
Y/n notices the smirk on his father’s face first before she notices the wrinkles. Looking even closer to him you can see the eerie similarities,from the aquamarine eyes to the rugged handsomeness and even the slightly muscular build.They even have the same hairstyle though Satoru’s low taper fade seems more clean cut .
However what gets her is how polarising their personalities are.
“And who’s this pretty sweetheart you have as a passenger? You finally got a girlfriend . I was beginning to wonder whether you had come out to me at any point in time and I just forgot.”His cheeky tone a vast constarts to Satoru’s deep murmurs.
“No dad, she’s just a friend.Y/n this is my father Satoru .”At least he called her a friend.
“If it gets confusing,you can call me Pa, or sweetheart . I prefer the latter.” He offers a warm shake and she laughs at the dumb flirt .
“Dad please stop it.” Satoru whines like an embarrassed teenager before moving his dad aside to get to the suitcases.
“I’ll get mine.”she leaps out of the truck .
“My dad would skin me alive if he saw you carrying anything heavier than a flower.”
“That’s right. I raised a gentleman.”He drawls as he shows her into the house. The cozy cottage exterior clearly shows itself within the house although clear renovations have been done from the open plan kitchen filled with luxurious equipment to the lack of the creaky wooden floors common in such houses,Y/n immediately basks into the fireplace,regretting not finishing her quilt which would be wonderful to cozy in a reading nook she notices close to the fireplace..
“Aren’t y’all hungry?Matilda and I cooked up something really delightful for both of y’all. But first freshen up.Satoru will show you to your room.”
“Thank you Mr Gojo. I’m happy to be a host in your beautiful range and your lovely home.”
“Aw how sweet you are.”
“And before I forget.”She opens up a suitcase to reveal another quilt that she had made for his father. “I know it's not the prettiest but I…”
“Oh this is delightful ,and the colours are so vibrant . Honestly I’ve made the house look so utilitarian but a woman’s touch like this would really liven up the place. Thank you dear.I’ll cherish it”
Satoru’s eyes sharpened and Y/n froze. What was wrong with simply giving a host a gift? It's not like it was expensive.
Dinner went wonderfully,Pa, as he had insisted to be called,was always cheerfully explaining anecdotes from Satoru’s childhood and the food was delicious.Matilda the house manager and him, had cooked up an array of soul foods that she hadn’t had the opportunity to enjoy. From the oven baked mac and cheese to the cornbread and greens and some oxtail and a moist red velvet as dessert,she was on her way to a food coma by the time she was done feasting.
And after she was finally allowed to rest,she decided to call up Suguru for one last checkup.
“You made it ! How’s the place” And as she begins to describe the warmth and hospitality she has had since the moment they set foot , Satoru walks in handing her a towel.
“Here,dad is wondering if you're comfortable or should we turn up the thermostat.”
“I’m fine .Thank yo-”
“Is that Satoru, put me on speaker”Suguru cuts into the conversation
“I’d rather speak to you privately” he responds frigidly before promptly leaving the room.
“I don’t know why you guys just couldn’t come with us.”she mutters once the door shuts.
“You know Ieiri couldn’t leave her car without going to the mechanic and besides,she’d have been alone.”he softly says,
“So you decided to let me go here alone with him, knowing well and good he doesn’t like me?”her tone dejected.
“Don’t say that”
“It's true,he looks at me like I’m fucking dirt ”she insists,gripping the towel handed to her firmly.
“You want me to talk to him?”
“You think telling on him will make it any better? I have no option but to take it in stride and hope for the fucking best “She sneers in response
“Y/n..”
“Ask him how his day was and don’t mention me. Goodnight.”
***
Y/n woke up bright and early to the sound of the roosters and their ceaseless clucking,wore a loose fitting shirt and some jean shorts and hoped to get some pictures of the sun as it rose above the horizon.
“Oh! You’re here! I thought you’d have been too exhausted to see the morning sun.”Pa walks over to her.
“I couldn’t miss such a shot.And it would look really good on my instagram.”She jests,which tickles Pa to the point of a loud laughter.
“Oh you youths and your picturesque moments.I love watching the sunrise. No matter how bad things get,you can always count for the sun to rise.”She smiles in response.
Satoru,who too had woken up from the clucking , squinted his eyes at the scene before him,his father and Y/n at the front of the house,mindlessly yapping while they waited for the sun to rise brightening all that it touches,including the two infront of him.
“Morning son.Are ya’ going to stare at us like a brooding skunk or are you going to join us?”Y/n looked back at him.The sun bathed upon her melanated complexion beautifully.His heart skipped a bit.
“I'm fine here.”he gruffed,brushing off that moment of weakness.
“If you say sooo”
“I should go help Matilda out.”Y/n insisted,pleased with the photos while filtering out captions for her latest post.
“Nonsense,she wouldn’t allow it. If I wasn’t such a great cook myself I don’t think she would trust me with anything.” he insists but Y/n being Y/n still smiles and bids them, hopping back to the house,directly avoiding Satoru.
“Are you two even friends?” Pa says as he sits on his rocking chair in his front porch whilst greeting some of the workers coming down the hill to the ranch.
“I’d say we have mutual friends.”he admits
“I’m guessing the two rascals Ieiri and Suguru.”
“Yeah, practically weaning her like a baby chick.”He huffs then waves at some of the workers.
“You aren’t doing a good job of pretending that you care about her.”he states nonchalantly
“And so?”
“Sooo…” he mockingly mimics his son’s voice. “... you shouldn’t act like that. What’s even wrong with her? She’s sweet, has a lovely personality and is attractive and don’t give me that look I’m just being objective “ Satoru twitches his mouth .
“You also can’t see it can you? She’s faking it obviously or were you immediately won over by the quilt?”
“Someone who's faking it doesn’t dedicate hours to creating something for simple sociability points. Does this have to do with your mo-”
“Breakfast is ready. I struggled but managed to force Matilda to get me to bake some cookies.I hope you like them.” Y/n smiles widely.
“Oh you sweet thing! How did you end up being friends with Mr grumpy pants” Pa rises from his chair before walking back into the house.
“Aren’t you coming?”She asks Satoru who groans as he lets the couch hug him deeper.
“Soon.”He manages to respond.
***
After breakfast, Satoru is not so subtly forced into some alone time with Y/n by familirising her with the ranch.The three acres that cover their relatively small ranch is bustling with activity from the eventual harvest of the wheats to the herding of the cattle though there is a certain lightheartedness despite the hard work the cowboys do.
Though Y/n isn't in the exact gear with only gumboots and a hat that she was given by Pa, Satoru looks right at home with his denim jeans ,cowboy boots ,fleece shirt and cowboy hat as opposed to the usual oversized sweater and baggy jeans that has become his staple back in his university. He seems happier waving to the long time caretakers and surprisingly introduces her to some of them ,though it seems short lived when one says,
“So boss,finally got a girlfriend huh?She’s a real sweet thing.”
“Sorry for the confusion.I’m his friend Y/n” She gives out her hand to shake.
“And what a stallion you are love!” He kisses her hand softly with a smirk.
“Okay,don’t be disgusting Josiah. You’re literally twice her age.”Satoru agitatedly responds while placing himself between them.
“Do I sense jealousy, sire?”
“Should I tell dad that you’re busy hovering over our guest instead of preparing the horses we should be riding on” Satoru lifts a brow.
“Brat. I raised you and this is how you repay me?”He mutters while walking away not without blowing another kiss at the flustered Y/n.
“As for you.Are you that desperate for male validation that you take anything you can grab your hands at?” He hovers over her. Y/n imagines steam coming out of his ears from how heavy he is breathing.
“Do you have a problem with me?”Y/n questions, facing him directly. Unfortunate how such a handsome face can have such a loathsome personality.
“Please dear,you’re not worth the time picking my brain over.”He scoffs in response.
“Oh really? Cause last time I checked,which is every moment since I first met you,you’ve been nothing but disagreeable when it comes to me and honestly I don’t even know why. Is it because I’m black?”
“If you think your race has anything to do with you as a person then perhaps you’re the racist.”
“Me as a person? What do you even mean by that? I have been nothing but kind to you.”she whines in frustration,her blood boiling .
“And that’s just it isn't it? You’ve been nothing but kind to me to Ieiri to Suguru and to every single fucking person you meet. You put on this charming barbie-esque persona that seems to have everyone twirling around your finger like a puppet and you think nobody knows how deceitful and manipulative you are. But I do .And just so you know beneath all that fake ass personality,is a sad little girl who probably still craves for the absent daddy who was never there to praise her.” And immediately after the words leave his mouth,he fully regrets it .Because he sees her ears welling up with tears almost about to burst.
“Look I’m -”
“Go fuck yourself Satoru Gojo. I’ll be out before sunset.”
***
“YOU DID WHAT?!”
“I know ,I know I was wrong?”
“You were wrong? That’s what you think it is that you feel guilty for your actions . You thought telling me,your father, would somehow alleviate some of the guilt you feel. Well let me tell you this young man. I hope you forever carry the guilt of hurting that gentle souled young girl for the rest of your life.”
Satoru’s head fell,noticing the wear of the floorboards.They should probably have those changed soon.
“I didn’t raise you like this. I swear I didn’t . Should I put you back to therapy? Is this because of your mom-”
“Dad please don’t bring it up, it was a long time ago.”
“Time heals but scars don’t fade as easily. And sometimes what you think is a healed scar is simply a ticking bomb where a miniscule touch may open the wound again.”
Pa sighs,sitting next to his son on the only couch in his office staring down at the same floorboards whilst patting his son’s back.
“I told you.Your mom leaving wasn’t anyone’s fault .Even her’s. She just wanted more than what the ranch offered and it was simply a sacrifice to cut ties with us for the sake of her soul.”
Silence ensues . A cow moos.
“These floorboards need changing .”Satoru responds.
***
Amidst packing,a knock was heard.
“Matilda, thank you but you really don’t need to give me anymore food. I already have enough to last me a month in my apartment”
She had fermented in a mix of self pity and loathing and had come to the conclusion that she would accept it if someone in the world didn't like her. It’s not like she’s not used to people excluding her,from playground bullies who thought she was a bit too introverted to high school mates who never wanted her to be in their P.E teams cause they thought she was too chubby to play volleyball well,it’s not an unusual occurrence in her life .
But God,doesn’t it still sting like the first time it happened.
“It’s not Matilda.”Satoru reveals,his tone meek.Y/n remains silent,a blank expression replacing her smile.She’s shed enough tears and shown him too much emotion. She doesn’t need to show him any more impact of his cruel words.
“I’m sorry and I know that’s not enough-”
“If you’re expecting forgiveness,you won’t find any. If you’re pleading for me to stay we both know you really don’t want me here. So please,can you finally leave me alone? Your father is taking me to the nearest bus stop. Hopefully I can still catch the light before I get back home so don’t interrupt me any further.”
This is the clearest she’s heard her actual voice in a long time,not the slight lilt that makes everyone a little more trusting of her but instead the natural deep falsetto that her mother and grandmother passed down to her. It’s ironically easier to be yourself with someone who doesn’t like you.
Before Satoru can even respond a sudden ring is heard on the door before
“HEY HEY THE LIFE OF THE PARTY JUST ARRIVED!”’Y/n freezes.
***
Lunch consisted of a hastingly yet loving prepared meal of chicken wings,a cold salad alongside some sour dough which the sudden guests ravaged on with less grace than a pig bathing in mud.
“Guys…when I tell you…I was so hungry I immediately started salivating when I saw one of your cows Pa…” Suguru attempted to say in between bites.
“Matilda,your wings are so so GOODDDD can I please have some more ma’am?” Ieiri moans whilst holding her plate up to Matilda who takes it off her hand with a tsk of disapproval .
“At least eat with some decency. Y’all are acting like this is the first meal you’ve seen since crossing the desert.”Pa scolds with little heat within his tone.
“At this point,I may have. Ieiri didn’t even let us have bathroom breaks.” Suguru scornfully says.Y/n who had been silent from the time she greeted them finally said.
“Well now that you’re here things can liven up a little bit.”
“Sato, have you not taken her horse riding yet? It’s the whole reason we are here! Besides you love showing off your purebred stallions so what’s the hold up?” Suguru questions and an awkward silence fills the room,Matilda immediately excusing herself back to the kitchen for the sake of some pie.
“Um-”
“With the travelling and the fact that I wanted to acquaint myself with some of the workers,we haven’t had time to go horse riding. But I’m looking forward to it!” She animatedly responds and Suguru’s skeptical brow relaxes instead focusing on the cranberry pie being served as dessert .
Pa suddenly steers the conversation to something less heated and though the tension is completely lifted ,Ieiri notices Y/n’s deliberate passive role in any new conversation. Something unlike the bubby exterior she exudes.
“So, um what car did you guys come with.”
“We had to borrow Suguru’s dad's Ford.Mine is still in the garage.”
“You really don’t want to get rid of it huh?”She laughs to herself before biting into her meal.
She’s going to get to the bottom of that sudden tension. One meddling way or another.
***
“Oh my dear Y/n how I have missed you! You haven’t betrayed me, my princess,I hope?”Suguru bemoans dramatically as he flops onto her bed, opening his arms widely for a hug.
“Oh my prince, I have dedicated poems in the hopes that I may see your loving eyes again. I couldn’t even think of anyone else whilst you were sent away from me.” Y/n responds with as much flair as possible before plopping herself onto Suguru to receive a crushing hug.
“You're okay?” he looked at her,her face bright with no obvious emotion straining her small smile
“Yeah, why?”
“Because last time I checked,you were well on your way to crying about how Satoru hates you and now you’re so accepting about it . So it's either something good happened or something went terribly wrong.”
A soft smile graces her cherubic features .
“You don't need to think too hard about that.”
“You're deflecting”. He spins her back to face him . Eyes watchful , making note of any flicker of emotion behind that smile blank expression she stoically holds.
“Like I said,it's no bother.We're cordial.”
“Cordial? What's with the sudden corporate jargon? Something definitely went down didn't it?”his tone deepens.
“If I bear hug you would you finally let it go?”
“I'm sorry for intruding.” Satoru pauses at the door before retreating
“Oh please intrude. Y/n here was cunningly trying to win her silence on a particular matter.”Suguru smirks before forcing both of them up.
“I’ll let you guys rest. You’ve had a long journey after all. Goodnight Suguru, Satoru.”She promptly gets up from the bed ,blowing a kiss to which Suguru dramatically clasps it to his heart.
When the door clicks shut,he turns his attention to Satoru.
“Look I know you’re the most emotionally constipated ..”
“Emotionally constipated??”Satoru guffaws.
“...person I know but what happened between you two. I mean she’d at least try and have a conversation with you but suddenly she couldn’t care less? In a span of two days?”
Satoru sighs before resigning to his fate.
“I fucked up.”
He proceeds to mention the events leading out to the fallout with Suguru’s expressions ranging from neutral to shocked and finally stony.
“I know what I did is wrong…”
“You think?”
“But it was in the heat of the moment. I didn’t mean any of it.”he urges/
“You know what’s funny. Even right now you’re still not putting any blame on yourself. You say you didn’t mean any of it when this has clearly been the foremost emotion whenever you see her and you just kept bottling and bottling it even further till it eventually blew up.”
“But-”
“And the fact that she still stayed and never mentioned it to me or Ieiri for the sake of keeping it civil shows more of her true character than what you believe. You think because you maintain a broody persona cause you’re mad at the world for your mom leaving makes you realer than anyone else.”Suguru’s tone is sharp and unrelenting,piercing Satoru’s heart.
“Too far”
“That’s too far and what you told her wasn’t? Even after you don’t know any of her situation or her family life . How homesick she must feel here? Honestly. You’re a piece of shit. “ Suguru spits out with as much venom as he possibly can before heading to shower. Opening the door,giggles erupt from the room next door.
“And just so you know, I’m not letting you go lightly. You will make up with her or she’ll not be the only one you’ll eventually have to be ‘cordial’ with.” before shutting the door.
Satoru’s eyes pin prick with tears,before wiping them off and sleeping on his side of the room.
***
The next day’s afternoon sun is sweltering as spring and summer play a game of ping pong on the weather.However despite the protests, Pa insists on having them horse riding.Y/n juggling her messenger bag filled with what she mentioned was a “treat’ once they reach their destination regrets lugging the heavy item.
They are all decked out with the usual cowboy gear from the fleece shirts that Pa generously hands over to cowboy boots that fit Y/n almost perfectly; she wonders if he bought them with intention. Her fleece especially is pink after insisting she doesn’t wear anything that makes her feel masculine.
“Y/n it’s just a fleece.”Suguru exasperatedly sighs
“I’m sorry but this is where I become a brat. Florals and pastels are my brand identity and I refuse to look like a stereotypical queer.”she responds
“HEY!” Ieiri barks out in mock offense.
“Sorry…”
Satoru hands her a pink fleece which she takes with a small thank you and after wearing it,ties it underneath her belly button.
“Why are we horse riding again?” Satoru grumbles to his father
“It’s what you’re here for.”
“No,we’re here to frolic under the shades of the trees and to boast about our spring break.”he retorts.
“Well,that ain’t going to happen.”
Horse riding at first seems fun but it quickly gets exhausting,especially for Y/n’s thighs which chaff whenever the horse gallops. She had been granted a doe eyed black beauty with all the poise and grace that horses naturally exude and Mellow was a sweet thing,easily gravitating to her as she did to the horse.
“Mellow doesn’t like being ridden.She must really like you.”Pa says with a smile before noticing her uncomfortable face.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah,just chafing. I underestimated how painful it might be horse riding with shorts on.”
“I brought some baby powder. It should reduce the strain.” Satoru comes right by her side drawing his horse closer to hers to hand her the bottle.
“..Thanks” She brushes her hands on his fingers accidentally before snatching the bottle with quick success.
‘He’s being odd’ She thinks before spreading it down her thighs.
“Where are we going anyway.”Suguru quizzes.
“Today,we are helping out with the branding of some of the wild cattle that sometimes cross our ranches borders.They just gave birth and we need to ensure the cattle raiders don't try to come for our new fawn.”Pa states.
“Wait, we're working too? Underneath this hot ass sun. Do you hate us? You can say that instead”Ieiri dramatically whines.
“Since you all moved to the city you’ve become so prim and proper unwilling to get your hands dirty. This is an opportunity to get back to your roots. I used to love seeing you all herding cattle and working at the stables.”Pa reminisces with a small smile on his face.
I hated shoving shit though. I can’t forget the stench.” Suguru laughs out loud at this. They soon make it at the edge of the border where all the cattle and their younglings have been rounded up and although some seem agitated for the most part,they are calmly grazing under the guard of a sweet shepherd dog fondly named Doggie.
“Josiah,how’s the stock?”
“Pretty well sire. None as sick and they seem as fit as ever.”He reports to Pa before glancing up at Y/n
“Have I died and gone to heaven or is this stunning beauty amidst my presence?”He hands her his hand aiding her to come down the horse who’s led away to a separate part of the expansive field.
“You flirt!” She giggles in response to which Suguru tsks in annoyance.
“I didn’t know you also partook in cradle robbing Josiah.”
“It's just a joke Suguru have a laugh will ya”
“I’m perfectly fine Suguru. Don’t be so uptight.” She locks her arm to his before leading him to the cattle.
“So cute. With such big knowing eyes too.” She points at a calf before taking a snap.
“You know back at home,I’d also go to the farmlands for the holidays. My grandma owns some cattle so I would help herding my favourite. I even named her Kami . What I didn’t realise was that I was fattening her up for the holidays and when Christmas arrived I woke up to find her hanging on the tree,blood dripping as they sliced her up. It was so traumatic.I cried all day and couldn’t eat.”Ieiri laughs hard at the anecdote. To which Y/n playfully shoves.
“Canon event I fear. But why did you cry so hard?”
“Cause I had never seen an animal being slaughtered . I honestly thought meat just came from the butchery. Didn’t think of the process before that.” To which Pa stifles a laugh.
“The butchery?How stupidly naive, ” Suguru laughs while affectionately hugging her.
“You know my father used to force me to help out with the slaughtering. At first I thought it was unnecessarily cruel but seeing how he treated each life as it should,not letting any meat go to waste, it taught me the value of life,ironically.”
Satoru watches the scene in slight awe. Y/n has the ability of turning what is considered a tiresome task to him and his peers to a bonding experience. Even as they share anecdotes of life in the countryside whilst holding the calves and cattle that seem to get frisky whenever the branding iron comes close to them,they still share laughs.
“Here. You’ve worked hard.” She hands him a small thermos filled with a cold lemonade that she made earlier in the day.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
***
After another heartwarming dinner, Ieiri and Y/n resign earlier than expected,exhaustion hanging over their shoulders.
“Oh my bed, my bed. I missed you so much.”She rolls around like a sunbathing snake.
“So dramatic.”Y.n chuckles before curling herself further into the sheets.
“So…it's time for girl talk or in this case.. a psychological analysis on Satoru Gojo and why he decided to say such harsh things to you.”Ieiri looks over to her.
“Who told you?”
“Suguru. He was furious last night. Don’t get me wrong,I too was but as a psych major,I have a layer of pity that I couldn’t brush off.”
“I just need to stay out of his way.And possibly have as little interactions with him as possible,”
“Weren’t you hurt? I mean those were such callous words to throw around with little to no explanation.”Ieiri’s eyes sink deeper to her chest. In reality she was hurt. It was hard enough going day to day alternating between believing what she showed herself to be was an authentic version of herself instead of another well crafted frontage of who she actually was. She doesn’t know if kindness is a natural trait in her.Satoru completely exposed her in a way no one has previously questioned.
Her high school years were a blur. In the psych elective she took, she remembers the lecturer explaining the neurological impacts of depression,particularly in loss of memories. However within the blurring,she sees the sham that was her joyful,extroverted personality. How she became the class clown to a bunch of bougie classmates who wouldn’t have cared less if she dropped dead. How her test scores clearly distinguished the reality of her mental state from the persona crafted.
It was hard having to release that side of her that just wanted to please as many people as possible at the demerit of her well-being. It was hard deciding to leave home and seek out a future fully estranged from the expectations her parents had. But she did it. Yet someone who barely knew her questioned her authenticity.
“Do I seem fake Ieiri?”The clear skies here allowed for the sky to expose the twinkling stars.
“Doesn’t the sun shine even in the dead of winter despite the window of time it is given? Kindness isn't easily created and yet you shine with it despite how dark it is. Isn't that proof enough.”
At that moment,that was enough.
***
“I’m sorry” Satoru softly says as they groom the horses in the stables. Another day at the farm meant another day of Pa using his free labourers for helping out in the fields and Suguru, huffing and puffing at once again having the short end of the straw by shoving shit.was a distance away when Satoru humbly approached her.
Decked in ratty overalls and dirty gumboots,Y/n looked the farthest from her usual self though given the cooing to the horses,was entirely not less different as she was the previous day.
“I’m sorry for hurting you. Within my own melting pot of emotions was a lingering jealousy. How easily you got along with others. How you seemed so entirely perfect and how eerily similar you reminded me of- I’m not making excuses. I would grovel at your feet for forgiveness. I really am sorry” He bowed his head before shuffling away looking almost like a scorned dog going to cry in the corner.
“Forgiveness is easily given,trusting you wouldn’t do this again is harder.”She responds calmly.He looks back wide eyed, he wasn’t expecting a response.
“All I can promise is that I will never intentionally mean to hurt you again.”He replies honestly ,eyes looking straight at her in conviction.
“That’s enough for me.”She smiled close and lipped.
He had never noticed how despite how dark the colour of her eyes were,they twinkled brightly.
***
A cozy campfire was placed with marshmallows on sticks and graham crackers on the side and in the midst of it all, Satoru and Y/n had resulted in a bickering match.
“The marshmallows should be close to charred to have the smoky flavour that is desired for a s'more,”he stressed.
“If I wanted to eat burnt toast then I would have used that method; however, it's obvious that a marshmallow should be lightly brown to increase the flavour of the marshmallow not diminish it.” She critiqued back.
“That ruins the entire ethos of the s’more. It should have a lingering umami at the base of your tongue.”he frustratingly emphasises
“So you watched the food network once and decided you’re the next Guy Fieri, try again!”she mockingly retorts
“Says the person making an undercooked,overly gooey consistency that she’s attempting to pass off as a s’more. Here in America,the founders of this great snack,we make them like this.”He points at his semi charred marshmallow before making a show of putting it between the crackers and smashing it.
“Ok then let’s ask the audience.” And suddenly the previously passive,disinterested group of threes attention started at by two pairs of unblinking laser focused eyes.
“I prefer it charred .” Suguru admits to which Satoru grins in victory.
“I prefer it lightly charred.”Ieiri adds evening out the playing field . Y/n sticks her tongue out to her debater.
“I couldn’t give less of a fuck. Can someone hand me my s’more please?”Pa surly requests to which Y/n gives out.
“If I had known getting you guys to work out your issues would have had an annoying consequence to my peace of mind, I wouldn’t have said anything.”Suguru peeves munching on his own s’mores,
“Well you should tell him to hold better opinions on certain ideas.”Y/n responds.
Pa had brought them out here on an attempt of a night in the wild and though Y/n was unamused by the idea of mosquitoes irritating her skin,she seemed eager to enjoy the night and the twinkling of the lake while being bathed under the full moonlight.
To kill the boredom,everyone was invited to share at least one scary stories but as the cycle continued to move,they ended up transfixed on Y/n’s stories of ghouls and monsters shared to her by her own mother and grandmother,including urban legends of possessions and demonic behaviours that had Ieiri clutching her pearls at one point.
“The two headed snake one was really scary.I genuinely thought I was reading something out of hunter x hunter” Y/n giggles they all resigned to their tents. Satoru and her ended up sharing the same one.
“My mom was fond of telling me such stories whenever we’d leave the city.”
“You guys used to camp?”
“No…but the villages back home aren’t as advanced as here. You’d be hard pressed to get electricity let alone constant running water so we’d entertain each other through stories.”
“I’d like to live like that.Seems interesting.”he mutters
“Of course you would.You’re white”she drowsily responds.
“A quarter white. My grandpa was white”he insists
“Same same anyways.”she slowly says. Before he could continue the conversation,he hears a slow snoring and he himself begins counting sheep before eventually falling into his own slumber himself.
Morning arrives with Y/n being the only one awake and feeling a bit adventurous,she decided to go on the shallow pool that surrounds the waterfall.The natural pond had a wooden deck that one could jump into.She wasn’t however,expecting the water to be still freezing cold and began to regret her decision as she tested the waters using the toes of her foot
“You’re doing it wrong.” Satoru suddenly says,jerking her foot out of the water.
“You scared me you fucker!” She curses and he laughs.
“What you’re supposed to do instead…”He flicks out his shirt revealing washboard abs that has Y/n slightly seething with envy.”...Is this” and from the deck jumps right into the middle of the natural pool.
“That way you don’t contemplate jumping in.”He says once he comes up for air.
“It's so cold though.” He brushes off her concerns with a shrug and motions her into the pool.She felt bashful over the fact that her fupa was visible thanks to the bikini she packed but seeing his encouraging smile urged her to lunge into the pool. The coolness of the water punched at her skin though as she comes up for air,she realises it wasn’t as bad as she thought it would have been.
The sight of the shimmering waters thanks to the rising sun makes the chilliness she feels worth it even as she aimlessly swims around the pool,she feels utterly content. That is until Satoru splashes at her and this cues a bunch of water games that are reminiscent of their childhood from marco polo to the weird ones like holding your breath underwater.
“You cheated! How could you hold your head underneath for three minutes.”She accuses.
“I did not!Prove it,” Satoru smirks.
“The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence bitch!”
“Okay guys,time to clear out.” Pa comes over with a closed smile on his face.
“Aww”They both whine.
“Don’t whine, y’all aren’t children.Breakfast was just served so we have to get that meal nice and hot.” He places their towels on the deck, clearly amused by their childlike joy of frisking around the pool in unmuted joy.
“Can we come later instead?”Satoru pleads.
“And what will you both eat?”He huffs
“We brought some extra snacks and we aren’t that hungry anyways. We’ll manage.”Y/n insists and Pa begrudgingly accepts before leaving with Ieiri and Suguru who were far too hungry to stay with them.
After Satoru peeks through the corner,ensuring they left he leaves the pool.
“There is a second reason why I asked them to leave.” He rustles through his backpack and takes out an A4 painting pad and some watercolours which he dilutes with the pond’s water.
“You paint?”Y/n says,drawing closer to the deck.
“Sometimes,when I’m in the mood to.”He nonchalantly responds whilst arranging his instruments.
“Why wouldn’t you want them to be aware that you paint?”
“They make it such a big deal.Before my mom skipped town,I used to paint a lot especially with her considering she taught me all the techniques I know. Obviously painting now isn't as fun as it used to be but I enjoy the occasional exercise.Now stay still. You’re the subject matter.”
Y/n obliges,careful not to move as much but a gnawing question eventually makes it out of her lips before she could stop herself.
“Why did she leave anyway?”
“She travelled a lot before she met my dad. They were total opposites. She seeked the thrill of adventure,he enjoyed stability. Eventually as I grew more independent she began to miss that lifestyle so they divorced amicably with my dad maintaining full custody.”
“Do you still talk?”
“Occasionally. Now hush, I need to draw your face as symmetrically as possible.”Satoru ignoring how awkward it felt revealing something so vulnerable to her.
The comforting silence allowed them to bask in the peace of nature from the chirping of the birds to the occasional small animal skittering around the abandoned campsite hoping to gather some leftover food. Y/n occasionally cooed at the frequent squirrel or rabbit that made its way towards them,one being so intrigued by Satoru’s painting that it came as close as it could hoping to see what he was achieving.
Eventually Satoru was done and let it dry on the deck as he jumped right back to the pool,floating aimlessly. Y/n,interested to know his achievement given his absolute silence on the matter,comes back to shore to check on it.
She marvels at the wonderful use of colours.The techniques he used gives the painting a beautiful blurred effect that well reflects the overall contentment they had both felt at the moment. But what truly leaves her speechless is herself.
A halo effect is cast subtly behind her figure and her features even those she considered insecurities like her stretch marks are cast in such an adoring light that she almost sheds tears at how beautiful you look. Satoru notices her silence with a contented smile.
“It’s beautiful”she stammers out while remaining awe struck at the image.
“I’m good ain’t I” he says with an air of arrogance.
“Okay Van Gogh,no need to show off.” Y/n teases whilst still staring at the image,capturing even the smallest detail like the additional flowers which definitely were not growing where she was floating around.
“It’s yours you know?”
“Really? But it's your hard work.”
“I can clearly make more of these if I want but I wanted you to have a souvenir to keep of your time here”
“Thank you Satoru.”She softly said.
“Welcome.”
***
Eventually the granola bars weren’t satisfactory enough and they made the long trek home.Greeted by Ieiri slowly sipping a lemonade at the front porch,
“Finally decided to come back home huh? Lemonade’s in the fridge alongside breakfast leftovers.”
“Oh thank God ! I’m fucking starving.”Satoru groans as he lugs both their backpacks inside the house.
“Do not make any step into the kitchen before putting anything you brought from the campsite away ‘Toru.”Matilda warns just before Satoru makes a mad dash into the kitchen.
“Okay…”he sulks as he heads upstairs.
“You two seem to be enjoying each other’s company.”Ieiri casually mentions once out of earshot.
“Yeah,he’s not so bad.”She staples her tongue on the gift she was given earlier. Though she will eventually frame it in her living room,it's nice to have something that only the two of them are aware of.
“Where’s Suguru anyway?”
“He’s planning the logistics of the truck once we arrive back at uni.”
Oh yeah. Uni. This was all temporary,the lightness in the air,the comforting family dinners,the cloudless summer skies and the familial environment wasn’t a permanent event but something to look back into with fondness.Though this thought doesn’t ease her breaking heart in the slightest.
Ieiri,noticing the sudden glum mood surrounding her says,
“I know what we can do for our final night?”
“What?”
“We should go to the club.”
“There’s a club nearby?”Y/n questions. To be honest,they haven’t been anywhere outside the range since they arrived.
“Yep,it's more of a bar than a club but it gets the job done,and they serve good whiskey.”
“Ew, whiskey.”Y/n scrunches her mouth up,already feeling the wash of the bitter drink down her throat.
“Why are we disgusted?”Suguru walks in,pincing Y/n’s cheek in greeting.
“We’re going to the club tonight.”
“Sweet. Ready to bust some moves Y/n? I’m really good at catching a whine.”He licks his lips salaciously to which Y/n scoffs at.
“You can’t handle this ass sorry.” Y/n responds before heading to the shower,already mentally shuffling through her unworn clothes to see which fits the vibe the most.
After stuffing her face full with food,she changes into a shimmery v hat, backless crop top with some jean booty shorts and sneakers she had carried earlier.
“What do you think!”
“They wouldn’t know what to do with you sweet cheeks.”Ieiri chuckles before asking her to help out with her liner. Her bold makeup compliments the skin tight,leathery top and bottom attire she has and Y/n has half a mind to question why they even stopped messing around.
“Stunning as usual.”Y/n says as she places the eyeliner away
“Thank you love”
“Okay okay are we set to go..woow ..guess we’ll have to be on bodyguard duty throughout the night right Satoru.”Suguru says as he walks in with his half buttoned dress shirt coupled with jeans and sneakers whereas Satoru had opted for a black tank top with low rising jeans and his cowboy boots.
“Say the two mr steal your girls next to us. I hope you don’t break up couples when you both walk in.”
“I’m flattered, doll” Satoru chuckled while roving his eyes at Y/n unnoticed by everyone except Suguru who smirks but remains silent.
“Pa isn't coming?”Ieiri questions, peeking outside hoping for him to show up.
“Nope,last time he was there he almost got arrested for punching someone half to death.Valid reason,the guy was spiking some girl’s drink but it still left a sour taste in his mouth.”Satoru explained as they headed downstairs.The warmth of summer was slowly enveloping the spring nights as even outside it was a bit humid so Satoru put the AC on blast and had everyone seated for a night to remember.
The “Wild Wild West” was as lively as a usual club back in the city.Though the usual clubs didn’t have a very rustic horse ranch aesthetic and instead served watered down cocktails at a marked up price.Here,it was either a beer,a cider or whiskey.
“So no cocktails.”Y/n sulked at the blonde haired bartender.
“No can do ma’am. If you care for something sweet you can have an apple cider,”Bessie explained.
“One please.” She resigns before turning back to their table with kegs for stools and tables, which would be so millennial-core burger joint weren’t it for the fact that most of the patrons were burly old white men or republican esque young groups.
“This place seems…conservative.”Y/n mentions as she gulps her drink, staring at the crowd hoping to find one skinfolk in desperation.
“Well this isn't the red state for no reason.People here are mostly…tame as long as you keep to yourself.”Satoru explains whilst taking a shot of his whiskey neat,already filling up his second cup.
“I haven’t even seen one black person.” She eventually whispers to Suguru after she comes to the frightening conclusion that she is the only black person around.
“Don;t worry.We’re here right? It’ll be fine. Now lighten up and drink your beer.”Suguru pats her lower waist in comfort and Y/n genuinely hopes that a few bottles of beer would loosen her up enough to dance.
One beer turned to two turned to five and suddenly she found herself dancing to some country music with as much vigor as she would have to any hip hop tune blaring in the speakers. She even got taught some famous country dance moves from some of the patrons and the coil in her stomach considerably loosened and she was quite ashamed of her previous judgements. It was all going so well… at least until the incident.
Y/n and Ieiri were casually dancing when a guy closer to their age was moving closer and closer to their proximity. Y/n had noticed his constant gaze at her from the moment she entered the bar but paid it no mind until he made himself clear. And he did.
“Hello lovely ladies. My name's Derrick and I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful your friend is and was wondering if I could share a dance with her?That is ,if you don’t mind.”He smoothly introduces himself and Ieiri,noticing how comfortable Y/n seems to be, moves over for the guy and walks back to the table.
Satoru looks over at the scene with an unreadable expression on his face.Noticing how the man’s hand glides to her lower back, the soft whispering into her ear that makes her giggle at whatever he said,her flirtatious smile at him. I mean he’s seen this multiple times,from the frat parties they are invited to,to even a study group where she manages to catch someone’s eye. She’s attractive.People go for attractive people. This,however,is the first time he’s felt like puking at the idea of someone being romantically involved with her.
“Damn, humanity is yet to create laser eyes but I’ll be sure to keep you informed when they are made.”Ieiri smirks.
“Huh?”Satoru responds,retaining his stare to the scene that makes him believe that hanging on his ball only would be less painful.
“Dude you look like you’re going to kill him then yourself.”Suguru mentions.
“Mmh” Satoru,disinterestedly replies.
“Oh no,he’s definitely caught it.”ieiri chuckles whilst gulping down her drink.
“Caught what?”Satoru breaks away from the scene to listen to whatever Ieiri has decided to psychoanalyze about him now.
“What I have formally dubbed the ‘Y/n curse’. Essentially,whether for a short or long period of time,people have the tendency to crush on Y/n after meeting her. Honestly after a year, I was beginning to think you were immune but I guess the symptoms only start to show after you become well acquainted with her.”
“What are you even saying ?”Satoru irritatedly says though the pit in his stomach finds her words scarily accurate.
“I’ll even come clean Satoru, After she broke it off with Ieiri,I unashamedly went after her.She politely declined, of course because of Ieiri but not going to lie she had me smitten for a month.”Suguru admits with a deep laugh
“Was that the reason you bought her that gold bracelet? I was wondering where that spirit of generosity suddenly overwhelmed you.Anyway that’s not it. I’m just …making sure she’s safe.”Satoru mutters, unable to even convince himself, let alone the snickering duo who leave him sulking to find other dance partners.
Y/n,unaware of the conflicting emotions swirling around her friend's head was basking at the attention Derrick was giving her. She would never even admit this even within her journal but she thrived in the attention she gets from people just from her presentation alone and she’s sure adding a slightly sweeter than normal personality may have the common layman weak on their knees.And who doesn’t like taming people?So everything was going fine and dandy before his hand slowly started moving lower at an attempt to grab her ass which she redirects to her back.
“Aw don’t be like that doll.I rarely get you see your kind up in these parts of the woods. At least let me have a tiny smack on them huh.”His previously honey coated words began to taste like rotten meat.
“ ‘My kind?’ I’m sorry I’m going to have to ask you to back up.”Her tone peppered an air of finality,her lips firmly pressed.Unamused with her stance on the matter he grips her elbow painfully while pressing her closer to his chest.
“I can’t stand uppity niggers so do as I say or-” His sentense gets cut by a sucker punch at his jaw,Y/n’s eyes widened at the sound his jaw made as it was crushed. The music around immediately goes to the halt,everyone staring at the scene with a mix of intrigue,confusion and entertainment.
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?”Derrick screeches whilst holding his jaw purple and his mouth dripping red.
“I saw you gripping her arm harshly.You were threatening her.”Satoru calmly says,softly holding Y/n and placing her behind Derrick’s line of sight.
“No I wasn’t and since you are out here playing superman,I should make you realize you aren't bulletproof” Before Derrick could removed his loaded gun from his holster tucked underneath his shirt,a bunch of men hold him down,forcing him to surrender not without cursing slurs at the group as they paid their tab and left the bar.
Y/n hadn;t truly grasped the full extent of the situation till they got home.Their ride was obviously silent due to the sudden attack. Satoru’s hands gripped his steering wheel for dear life, shaking with anger at how the situation went down. Ieiri attempts to comfort Y/n in the backseat,soothingly patting her back whereas Suguru seems ready to go back for blood. By the time they park at home almost everyone seems ready to hit the haystack.
“Can you guys give me and Satoru a minute ?” Y/n encourages them to get inside and once they are out of earshot,she begins to speak.
“I’m so sorry for everything that went down. It was entirely my fault..”
“Hey,hey don’t say that. None of this was your fault.”
“Yes it was! I was just being an attention whore..”
“Don’t you think you’re being a bit too harsh on yourself?It was him who came up to you,it was him who was sexually harassing you and it was him who attempted to shoot me.Not you,never you.”And against his better judgement,clouded by the sheer volume of anger at the guy while simultaneously being grateful that she remained safe and sound ,he pecks her forehead and hugs her tightly,hoping at least that she forgets this unfortunate event
If he could, He would erase it entirely from her mind.
***
Morning came and this was shrouded with the melancholy of their last day in the farm.Despite the events of the previous night,Y/n woke up early hoping to capture the last time she’ll be able to enjoy the morning rays before they eventually have to say goodbye for now.
“I knew you’d be awake.”Pa says as he comes right to her,exactly where they stood the first time she arrived.
“Morning Pa. I just couldn’t imagine missing it. It feels so bitter sweet but I’ve gotten more than what I expected from when I first arrived.”Y/n smiles at him.
“I’m glad this was a refuge to you.”As they watch the horizon shine a brilliant golden orange light he makes an odd request.
“I know my Satoru hasn’t been the kindest to you in the past year,And while I hope he’s learned from his mistake and has begun rectifying the damage , it seems so horrid of me to ask but please kindly allow him to show himself to you. What you’ve seen is a glimpse of my beautiful,kind boy and I hope you can give him the opportunity for him to show you more of himself.”He smiles ,though the unshed tears on his eyes reveal his hidden emotions.
“Of course Pa. You’ve raised a truly wonderful man.”She hugs him tightly .
“What are you crybabies doing here? Delaying the inevitable.”Satoru comes up to them though he looms over through both of them in muted interest in the conversation.
“You meanie! You can’t let us have a moment.”Y/n cries out.
“Nope! Especially since time is ticking and we need to start heading out.”Satoru reminds,pointing at his imaginary watch
“Oh,Let me grab my luggage.”She attempts to rush back into the household before Satoru holds her in place.
“Already did.Now let's go eat breakfast.Matilda prepared a feast fit for kings.”Satoru leads them back to the house where a grand breakfast has been laid with everything one would want from it.
Breakfast is had with an exchange of stories and plates being passed around and before any of them realise it,their tummies are full and the moment they have all been dreading hangs over their heads.
“I’m going to miss having you kids here. My old heart is so warmed by the fact that you took time to see me.”Pa says while they are all at the parking lot with coolers filled with Matilda’s road trip snacks that will definitely last them a month filled to the brim.
“Dad please don’t make this sappy.You’re barely 60!”Satoru says though his throat is lodged with unmistakable grief of having to leave his father here.
“Oh Satoru,it seems only yesterday when I was changing your diapers and now look at you! A grown man. I’m not getting any younger so please bring a girlfriend next time.”Matilda says with a sad smile on her face.
“And for the next recruit to the team,I honor you , these cowboy boots.” And despite her protests Y/n is given the same boots she has been wearing throughout the break.
“Thank you,I’ll cherish them.” She hugs them tightly.
“Now get a move on before I force you all back in the house and barricade the doors.”And after tight hugging and a few tears being shed, the convoy of 2 slowly make their way out of the ranch and back to their day to day stressors.
“Was it fun?” Satoru asks Y/n once they are further ahead.
“A moment I’ll cherish forever.Especially since I now won you over.”She responds, looking down at her boots.
“Who told you that you won me over?”Satoru mockingly asks.
“Don’t tease Satoru,” She lightly elbows him.
“But I’m glad that I ended up coming. I made a brand new friend.”She smiles at him.
He smiles back though his heart slightly twinges.
Because,he’s starting to believe that there was more in the complex weave of his emotions that he simply didn’t like her due to her ‘fakeness’
And rather, a buried emotion is slowly unravelling that is no longer within his control.
I used to be a grader and an occasional substitute prof for an introductory astronomy lab. That means that the majority of the people in this lab are only taking it because it’s a requirement and about half of them think it’s an astrology class.
I was grading midterms and this one girl. She was so nice and I think she was a business major. Fuck. The question on the midterm was to draw a diagram of the solar system and this poor girl. This fucking girl had drawn a Mars-centric solar system. As in every planet and the sun were orbiting Mars. I now actually have a custom Cards Againsy Humanity card I got at a con that says “A Mars-centric solar system”
I had a boy argue with me that there was liquid water on the moon (this was around when they had found liquid water on Mars in ~2015) and he wouldn’t believe me that he likely meant Mars and not the moon. After I marked his answer to the relevant lab question wrong, he took it to the department head who had promptly laughed him out of the office.
And there was another boy who, during a lab in our observatory where we would look at certain things in the sky, asked where the sun was. At 10pm in November. After some questioning it was revealed that he thought the moon and the sun were the same thing.
My friend, whom I love dearly, found out that the moon orbits the earth as a 20-year-old in an upper-level political science class, and was utterly and completely flabbergasted. When questioned, her defense was that she doesn’t have anything to do with the moon, so why would she have needed to know?
i was once talking to a friend of mine about how at that point in time you could see mars, jupiter, and venus at the same time, which was pretty cool, and she said “where’s pluto? wait, it was destroyed” and that’s how i found out that my friend, who is in her third year of a medical degree, thought that pluto stopped being a planet because it was eaten by a black hole.
When i was in physics class my sophomore year of high school, the teacher drew a simplified diagram of a person standing on the planet earth as part of the explanation for how it was initially discovered that the earth was round. And one girl sitting in the class said "wait... we live on the OUTSIDE???"
she had spent her whole life thinking that the earth was a hollow sphere and that we lived on the inner walls of it
i had a coworker in his early twenties who, when i mentioned seeing admiring how bright mars was that morning on the drive to work, laughed and said 'mars? like the planet?' and i was like 'yeah mars the planet. it looks like a very bright star, it was supposed to be extra bright and close lately.' and he got quiet and oddly worried and he said, quietly, carefully, '...are planets... real?' like he was checking to see if i was completely insane.
i experienced a brief moment of crisis and said back 'yes. planets are real. did you.... think they weren't real?' and he looked even more disturbed and said, 'no. they're just made up for movies and shit, right?' and i was totally horrified by this point and said 'planets are real. the solar system has nine of them. the universe has billions of them. we make up fictional planets for movies but there are definitely real planets that actually exist.'
he said, like he sincerely thought i was fucking with him, 'how do you know planets are real?'
i said, 'i've seen them. i've seen saturn through a telescope. you can go outside right now and see mars and venus in the sky. i swear that planets are a real thing.'
he said, muttering now, 'well, maybe that's just what you think.'
the conversation did not get any better from there.
Suguru likes to unravel people.Especially the people he likes
Words : 1K
Idk where the inspiration came from. But I'm enjoying these one shots.Also BTS comeback so you know I had to do a slight bts reference.
Suguru knows that she’s lying to people.
Her soft easy smiles look authentic at first until you realise that they don’t crinkle her eyes the way the real ones do.Her practiced animated tone could be confused with overeagerness yet if you looked into any disney screen character you would hear the exact level of inflection.Her expert ability in knowing which jokes will land and when to laugh seems almost perfect until you notice her eyes scrunch up at every tone and every facial expression at the split second before an action should be taken.
He’s being mean,she’s not entirely lying,she’s masking . And he should know because he’s spent every moment around her simply observing her and every second he can spare to look into her soulless instagram page filled with the appropriate amount of content that wouldn’t make her a social pariah but also wouldn’t consider her a chronic user.
And even as he looked again at her highlights,hoping to find a glimpse of something that would peel off the infinite amount of layers behind the enigma that was her,he almost threw in the towel before he found a hint. Her favorite song,jamais vu and immediately went digging in every other social media platform.This seemingly insignificant clue led to a rabbit hole of information that his dear alice had left as a breadcrumb. Facade’s crack all the time.
***
She found it weird spending time with Satoru and Ieiri.Because wherever they were,Suguru calmly followed behind and she found Suguru weird.
Well weird is mean.He’s polite and never pries, yet she can always feel his phantom stare at the back of her neck,as though he is aware she’s playing a well rehearsed role.
Ever since they let her join the Trifecta after orientation day,she’s never being able to get closer to him. She’s obviously the closest to Ieiri but has spent enough time alone with Satoru that it's no longer awkward. However,in the brief moments that she’s with neither,whether it be for a quick snack run or simply studying,her heartbeat quickens and her palms retain their sweat . It's not like he does anything wrong. His nonchalance is a pillar that holds the group together and his kindness can be seen whenever he includes her in activities but it feels like he’s always aware of her well crafted persona.
Just like now,the tension is thicker than thieves and she has been reduced to watching reels while Ieiri goes for a smoking break and Satoru accompanies her with stale college gossip that he’s eager to share.
“How’s machine learning taking you?” She asks,hoping to break the glacial tension between them
“Interesting,hard but it's entertaining . And how’s political science taking you”
“It’s hard but I’m sure it's not as hard as your course.”She responds
“Don’t sell yourself short.I’m sure it's not as easy as you’re making it seem to be.I heard you’re getting a proper internship on the way,Congrats by the way,I’ll send a gift”He responds calmly.
He has a way of using his words,she noticed. An easy pattern recognition tactic that she repeated in social situations is to always sell yourself short. Make yourself humbler than you need to.Most people would simply begin speaking about themselves but never Suguru. He forces the spotlight back to you,whether you’re interested in it or not. Maybe that’s why despite being so different,he and Satoru mesh so well.
“Please don’t bother,it's only for the summer anyway”She retorts.
“Nonsense,Satoru and I had a look at the firm. It’s a serious deal to get even in any of their undergraduate programmes . So tell me…what would you like?” He moves closer to her and she hitches . Satoru and Ieiri can be convinced to not make anything a big deal but not Suguru.
“Okay…can you cook your meatballs and mashed potatoes for dinner next time?The ones you made on Satoru’s birthday.They were really good.” He smiles widely,the first big smile he’s ever directed at her.
“Of course.”
***
Suguru almost screamed at the top of his lungs when she requested dinner.Frankly,he didn’t expect her to have such a specific request,he actually expected a lot more badgering before she could give in but this was better than he expected. He genuinely wanted to make it a small party, maybe even invite his former high school juniors Nanami and Haibara but the more he remembers how sweetly and honestly she requested for the meal the more he only wanted to be at her centre of her attention.
So,respectfully of course,he asked Satoru and Ieiri to fuck off for the night and got right into making his studio apartment as clean as he could before he started prepping. And as he had removed the meatballs from the oven and back onto the frying pan for one last saute,the doorbell rang.
Dressed in a cute floral summer dress and sneakers with flowers and a bottle of wine,she looked achingly adorable.
“Hi,Suguru.I hope I’m not taking you out in the middle of something.”
“You actually arrived at the perfect time.Please come in.Are these mine? You shouldn’t have after all,this is all for you.”He tuts as he places the flowers in a vase.
“I couldn’t help it. It’s hard to come to someone’s home without a gift.”One thing Suguru is assured of is that her kindness is not manufactured.
“It smells lovely. Are Ieiri and Satoru coming by soon?”
“Unfortunately they won't be able to. Group projects have them busy.”Based on the way she froze slightly, Suguru assumed that they weren’t in contact today,good,it would make it easier to inform them of the lie.
“Oh,Well sucks to be them.”She shakily laughs out.
“Also,I have something for you.”He says as he has her seat at the dining table perfectly set and underneath his chair,unveils a stuffy. Specifically a stitch stuffy.One that she had constantly raved about in her private twitter account.
Which he got after digging.
He went scouring the internet to search between the other millions of people who named themselves jamais vu,he found an account that he was 80% sure was her. From the “voice” which seemed eerily similar to her bio in her instagram, to the profile picture which he noticed was from a gallery she had visited recently,and the biggest clue was her mentioning the coursework that he was sure she was struggling with in the previous semester.
He indulged in her world. He drank up her song recommendations. He drowned in her introspective thoughts and feelings and he genuinely enjoyed so much of her favourite childhood shows (hence the stitch stuffy).He loved to be the only one aware of this oasis filled with so much more life than what she showed. Without even making her image the focal point,she had managed to lure so many of her online mutuals to a community where she could freely express herself.
“Stitch? I mean I love it but how did you know I loved lilo and stitch. I swore I couldn’t have told anyone about it.”
“Lucky guess. Honestly I just remembered you liked stuffies and picked the first one that wasn’t just cute.”A carefully constructed lie. He didn’t want access revoked to the window of your soul so easily.
“Thank you. This is the kindest thing that’s happened to me in a while.”She smiles widely and her eyes crinkle.
And in that moment, he willingly opened his heart to her.
Satoru can't understand his crush's sudden obsession
Words 1k
Please forgive my writing. I'm trying to get back to it after a two year hiatus.
Satoru looks at the love of his life walking casually to her spot by the window and sees it.
Honestly,he never expected her to fall for it.She always seemed to go against the grain on everything,from being the only black girl in their petroleum engineering course to having her outfits in various vibrant shades of the rainbow to her neatly puffed fro,she was always going to stand out.
However,seeing her now walk into the classroom with her bangles dancing and tote swaying, he paused at the abomination of a doll dangling on it.
A labubu. A pink eyed,pink furred labubu smirking back at him.
And he gets it – honestly he does. He’s not immune to the vicious trends capitalism churns out at every second through a dead internet where within the carcasses are ads desperately pleading for your attention.Actually it's the whole reason he got into Chrome Hearts and Vivienne Westwood.But she seemed so different.Blabbering to all her friends about Thomas Sankara and Pan Africanism. Consistently dressing like a goddess with her flowy maxi length skirts and crop tops that he swore almost gave one of their classmates a nosebleed the first time she walked into the hall,she can’t be the same person now sporting a labubu like it's a trophy item.
And when class is over and she leaves,he follows her wafting vanilla scent that seems to permeate every room she’s in and he gets to hear her thoughts on the sudden personality shift.
“Honestly,” She stares loving at the gremlin, “I hate to say it but its the cutest thing on earth.I hate being a fucking sheep about it but I can’t help meaning to want to have as many as I can. It has to be some mass psychosis because it's unleashing something maternal to me . Could this be a government ploy to have more women willing to have children?”And she laughs,her boisterous laugh that seems to shake every room she’s in at whatever the response the person on the phone gave her.
And he finally has a reason to strike up a conversation with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid his eyes on.
***
She doesn’t understand how a meaningless trend has suddenly transformed to an utter obsession. Especially at a time when she’s pinching for pennies at every juncture but the gods of consumerism have finally won her over with this one little thing.
Everyone she meets begins to strike a conversation with her because of her ugly,toothy creature that she dons as an accessory everywhere. Her friends,who at first were skeptical and even mocking about her “baby” now sport their own versions of a labubu to the point that they spent one night in her dorm room knitting outfits for them instead of going to the club.
But honestly,this is the first time she’s had fun with something since the year began.The sophomore curse has just began as their engineering class halved after a god awful exam and it seems like everyone’s doing better except her,not to mention the constant noose on her neck that is the scholarship that would send her packing if her grades don’t improve.
When it rains,it pours.
So this was a necessary reprieve.Yes,she had to eat cup noodles for the rest of the week after splurging on it but considering the joy the doll has given her,she considers it a necessary sacrifice and something that,at least considering she’s the only girl in her class currently,that she won’t be able to share outside her own little world.
So imagine her surprise when she sees a zimomo on the bag of one of her classmates on a normal Thursday afternoon.Class has barely begun and as usual she’s seconds away from the professor getting in. At first,it was a glance,then a double take as she realized that cunning smile and the hypnotic big eyes staring back at her from its position on her classmates rucksack.She steals a glance at the person who owns it,and it's…
Honestly she can’t really remember his name Jogo or Sato, but she’s aware of the guy,he’s smart,incredibly so considering he’s the reason their scores were so low during the last paper. He seems nice?She should really start paying more attention to people.The only thing she knows about the guy is the fact that his money is long. I mean, chrome hearts on every finger? That’s not chump change.
***
Satoru saw her perceptive eye. He deliberately sat across her favourite spot,practically calculated how easy she would be able to spot the doll before placing it on his bag and it paid off. She constantly kept glancing at it,then him,then back at it.This is the longest she’s had her attention at him ever since they started university. He doesn’t even think that she’s noticed he’s been around her since freshman orientation day and has proceeded to do everything in his power to make her notice him and failed miserably.Until now.
Even as he first got his own,he still doesn’t understand the appeal.Suguru scoffed and Shoko cackled but they aren't the target audience anyway.And,as though Buddha himself had cleared the path for him,they were suddenly paired for a project.
“Hi,I’m Y/n” She smiled warmly as she shaked his hand and proceeded to sit across from him in the lecture hall . Up close he could see the details in her skin that he hadn’t gotten the chance to appreciate,her double eyelids.The mole that sat at the edge of her eyes,the way her gloss accentuated the plumpness of her lips,the warmth on her palm..
“Satoru Gojo,Just call me Satoru.”he smiled in response, timing his shake to an appropriate amount of seconds.
“Um..before we begin,I noticed you have a zimomo? It's so cute! Can I hold it and take a picture to share it with my friends.Honestly I didn’t think anyone in class would have it!” She animatedly asks and he has to bite back a smile at her innocence and naivety
“Sure” he unclasps it and hands it to her and as she takes a picture, places her own labubu directly next to it and he has to will his rapidly beating heart to stay still as she shares the picture to her friends.
“Thank you. They have a certain charm about them right?”
I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞
The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔
Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊
Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉
had a dream last night that i was in a church and there were angel wings pinned to the walls. i touched a pair and realised then that they weren't made of feathers, but of words - millions of tiny letters overlapping in an imitation of flight, like starling murmurations. when i withdrew my hands the letters had been burned into my skin. they were far too small to read with my naked eyes, but knew exactly what they said somehow, nonetheless.
it did hurt, being burned like that. it hurt the whole time, but i didn't realise it until i took my hands away. i wonder if that's what draws humanity to crave divinity, even though it can so easily destroy us. even though it hurts, it's so alluring that it makes moths chasing flames out of us just the same. would you still snatch your hand back from the stovetop as quickly if it sang to you that it could make a beautiful ruin of your flesh?
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