hand on my stupid heart

bandit/west • it/its | tme • 26

[bndtwst]

I JUST WANT TO FUNCTION I WANT TO BE A PERSON SO BAD AND I CAN NEVER SEEM TO MANAGE FOR MORE THAN A FEW HOURS AT A TIME

[bndtwst]

I hate this I hate this I hate myself I don't know how to exist I feel like I'm going to implode I just want ityto fucking stop

[bndtwst]

so basically it's so difficult to live in. A brain where I can't tell which way is up or down or what happened or why I am panicking or what thought I had in my head two seconds ago or why I cant stop punching myself in the head I don't know! And the fact that I'm even able to string these words together into sentences must mean I'm a lying piece of shit. I can't think I can't hardly even fucking breathe I don't know what is going on

[5ner]

[kaylmao]

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

[rook-jemmy]

"becomes" 🤨🙄

[rook-jemmy]

portal 2 is an american gothic horror story about an incredibly traumatized and exploited girl who was forced into a perpetual hell of servitude by the forces of capital and infinite growth. portal 2 is about how science owes its greatest achievements to women who never received any credit or control over the industries that they created. portal 2 is about how tech companies dehumanize and exploit feminized labor. portal 2 is about physically exploring a woman's repressed memories and realizing she was right to kill all those people with deadly neurotoxin. portal 2 is about fighting the piece of you they created to keep you weak and easy to control, ripping it out, and sending it to the fucking moon. portal 2 is about helping your traumatized girlfriend come to grips with her violent past. portal 2 is about how tech CEOs are so fucking stupid they would probably die from snorting moon rocks. portal 2 is about rape and exploitation and capitalism and vivisection and everything that would make you go 'ewwie' if it wasnt happening to a gigantic robot

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

Yeha I don't feel like making new posts all the time and unfortunately that leads to me not getting the help I need and exhausting my resources but I feel like I'm in a race to the bottom. I feel like I'm genuinely going to die here. It's not safe living with these people. My "family". Please help me get out of this place

PayPal.me/tominova

Cash.me/$tomi1

Venmo: tominova

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

I'm helping friends flip a house and we could use help to do that!!

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

Hey please help, this is an opportunity to have a place to stay

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

Hah. Ha ha. So guess who went to the ER AGAIN last night after bouts of severe asthma attacks and had an anxiety attack after getting a steroid shot to treat said asthma

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

Hey I Really need help today

[killbenedictcumberbatchagain]

Oh yeah I'm definitely begging for people's help today after nearly getting assaulted last night on two separate occasions and almost getting rammed by a bus who stopped for the man right next to me and drove off when I tried to get on like I want to fucking evaporate right now I am so upset because there's no fucking reason for people to be this cruel to be publicly

[memogarciag]

[fuegocontrahielo]

nice!

[wintercorrybriea2]

Soma Faitanin

[mod2amaryllis]

there's so many reasons the skeptical response to trans ralsei annoys me, the fundamental one of course being transphobia, but I'm also annoyed in a pretentious text-reading way. like erm the girl wears ribbons huh? the "Prince" being a "Prince" is crucial to a prophecy with a tragic outcome? chapter 5 feels like a brick to the head if you know how to read. I've never tried being a princess said with such joy, the themes of fate defiance and being who you want to be even if it's not "real." isn't that right princess? I'm just like are you stupid? are you people stupid?

[mod2amaryllis]

but the most annoying by far is the "but MY representation" crowd. it's soooo GRRRRRR

lately I'm seeing a lot of talk around not needing to relate to something to enjoy it, which i love, good and necessary way to approach media. can't count how many people i grew up with who used the relatability argument to avoid queer or Black music/art/etc.

but also? maybe do relate to it. maybe you should actually be able to relate to experiences that have nothing to do with you. you should be able to see a trans story and think "I've had feelings like that." i think there's this confusion between relating vs ownership. have you ever felt like you don't belong in your role but you can't leave it or something bad will happen? me too! now imagine how trans women must feel!

[yesornopolls]

Have you eaten a poptart this week?

Have you eaten a poptart this week?

Yes

No

Voting ended onJul 20

[imp]

the other day while i was tripping i couldnt count objects on the floor for a second and then i started freaking out about how babies learn to count via being brainwashed about objects and the fact that it takes literal years for the programming to initially set in. like i was researcheing how to teach babies to count

[intactics-deactivated20211231]

okay but the psyop literally begins at ego/universe differentiation

[imp]

[rcpaskus]

[prettyfukinalone]

Turns out showing the pain you feel changes nothing

[bndtwst]

embarrassing. basically *turns into a speck and then hit by bus*

[bndtwst]

body is hell

[bndtwst]

everything hurts so bad 😃