Welcome to the weird place

I'm kinda just vibin' in here

[dogpuppy]

[hppjmxrgosg]

IM BACK BABY

dbi chapter 23 up now holla

and with it: my memes

[hersurvival]

[burins]

thinking fondly of this meme I made for a coworker years and years ago

[burins]

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

[parakeet]

just found out about this cute little birdy and i am in love

[crowcryptid]

[awheckery]

from the above-linked ebird.org:

Anis are bizarre, coal-black cuckoos with long floppy tails and unique, curiously tall, flattened bills. Groove-billed occurs in a variety of open and semi-open habitats in tropical lowlands and foothills, typically staying low in shrubs and grasses. Gregarious and not particularly graceful; usually seen crashing around awkwardly in small groups.

oh my god

[roach-works]

groove billed anis are a hilarious cuckoo situation where they ended up laying their eggs in one another’s nests instead of anyone else’s. they hang out together in groups of up to five pairs until a nest gets built (sometimes by committee, sometimes they just hang around hopefully until someone does it all on their own) then they start sneaking over and laying an egg in at a time. the females who lay for the first time will sometimes flip prior eggs out of the nest like ‘oh i KNOW this one isn’t mine! away it goes’ but eventually everyone’s laid a couple eggs in there and is stuck with the mutual hostage situation. then they take turns incubating until all the kids hatch and everyone pitches in on feeding them, because no one knows which of the kids are theirs so they all might as well.

they also like to do a team handshake where they clump up and mutually make a low bubbling noise together, to signal group affiliation. go team!

[keeskiwi]

Also their eggs are incredibly beautiful. They’re a very pretty blue color, but covered by a white chalky outer layer that is easily scratched off, so they end up in various stages of in-between.

(Photo © Henrique_Anizio, shared under CC BY-NC).

[ampervadasz]

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I realize this is a cast iron gate but I’m choosing to believe it’s a magic protection ritual

[princecharmingtobe]

It IS a magic protection ritual, and it summons an iron gate to protect you from intruders. 

[rando-posts]

“I cast Iron Gate!”

[diary-of-a-teenage-blacksmith]

As a blacksmith I have been called a wizard by several small kids

[marlynnofmany]

And they would be correct.

[socialmaya]

Occasionally forget people genuinely think capitalism is thousands of years old

[sylestial]

One time I was talking about Robin Hood with some coworkers and one guy was like “he was bad because the people he helped learned to expect handouts” and I wanted to be like… okay can you explain how that flawed capitalist propaganda applies to feudalism

[scallioncreamcheesebagel]

reminder that capitalism was literally invented in the 16th century

[tayefeth]

That’s an exaggeration. What was invented in the 16th century was mercantilism. Capitalism really dates for the beginning of the nineteenth century, with the rise of industry and cash crops over artisans and merchants. Vulture capitalism, with the notion that companies have no duties other than generating profit, is even younger.

[antique-scarecrow]

Capitalism is only 200 years old and I have to say, they have not been an impressive 200 years

[downtroddendeity]

I think a lot of this comes from the fact that most people don’t know the formal definition of capitalism. We all know the word, we’ve all seen the jokes, but very few people bother to actually define it unless they’re talking about political theory and philosophy, so it’s easy to end up with the impression that Capitalism = Money Can Be Exchanged For Goods And Services.

Capitalism is the economic system where most of the means of production (i.e. everything people need to have to make the stuff that everyone wants) are owned by private individuals or corporations, who then hire people to provide the labor necessary to produce things, with the intent of selling the output at a profit. It’s the difference between “you’re a carpenter and you make a chair and you sell it” and “you’re Richard Q. Richington who owns a chair factory, and you pay people to sell the chairs you paid other people to make and then all the excess money goes back to you.” There have been Richard Q. Richingtons on and off throughout history, but that being the norm for every single industry is a pretty recent development.

[iheartvelma]

Commerce ≠ Capitalism.

Societies have had commerce for millennia. We’ve had taxes, public goods, banks (or at least moneylenders), salaried employees, etc for equally as long.

Since the days of trading beads, shells and gemstones, people have had systems of stored value as currency they could exchange for goods and services.

Capitalism is private ownership of the means of production; ie the tools, the machines, the infrastructure, the buildings, etc. plus intangibles like systems, patents, formulas, intellectual property; and crucially the initial financial stake and those of the shareholders - all of this is the “capital” put to use in generating profit for the owners.

Public ownership can take many forms, but the point of a publicly owned entity is to use any operating profit (or cost savings) to deliver benefits or dividends to citizens.

Usually, the public mandate means it must provide service to everyone, at reasonable cost if not free at point of service, including unprofitable ones. Think of the USPS’ mandate to serve rural locations, or public hospitals’ mandate to help all regardless of ability to pay.

[aethy-bathey]

ANTS IN A ROW RAGLAN IS DONE!! still need to block it tho

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

When we were children, my sister had private music lessons at her violin teacher’s house. I only visited there once, but I still remember that afternoon. The teacher had an artificial pond in her yard, a large beautiful thing with lily pads and plant life. And in the pond, there were goldfish. I had never seen such enormous goldfish. 

I spent several minutes just staring at them (and trying to convince them to bite my fingers.) When my sister’s violin lesson ended, her teacher came out to the yard and explained that these goldfish were the same small creatures that were often unfortunately sold in plastic bags at state fairs. They were only about two inches long apiece, when she bought them and put them in the new, empty pond. In essence, they were like every goldfish I had seen before, but they had been given a much larger, much richer environment in which to flourish. As a result, they had grown into some of the most remarkable, vibrant creatures my twelve-year-old self had ever met with. All because of a pond. 

Funny what lessons children remember. My sister doesn’t play the violin anymore, but that was the first time I caught a glimpse of the overwhelming extent to which it matters, the way the world treats us.

[yellow-hatco]

Reblogged again for this drawing I made for it

[221b-hound]

Give us room to grow and see how we flourish.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

When we were children, my sister had private music lessons at her violin teacher’s house. I only visited there once, but I still remember that afternoon. The teacher had an artificial pond in her yard, a large beautiful thing with lily pads and plant life. And in the pond, there were goldfish. I had never seen such enormous goldfish. 

I spent several minutes just staring at them (and trying to convince them to bite my fingers.) When my sister’s violin lesson ended, her teacher came out to the yard and explained that these goldfish were the same small creatures that were often unfortunately sold in plastic bags at state fairs. They were only about two inches long apiece, when she bought them and put them in the new, empty pond. In essence, they were like every goldfish I had seen before, but they had been given a much larger, much richer environment in which to flourish. As a result, they had grown into some of the most remarkable, vibrant creatures my twelve-year-old self had ever met with. All because of a pond. 

Funny what lessons children remember. My sister doesn’t play the violin anymore, but that was the first time I caught a glimpse of the overwhelming extent to which it matters, the way the world treats us.

[yellow-hatco]

Reblogged again for this drawing I made for it

[221b-hound]

Give us room to grow and see how we flourish.

[shrugsinchinese]

Be real Adrian who do you think you’re fooling

Context for twilling

[sandersstudies]

Me: man I wish I knew more of my neighbors better

My nine-year-old neighbor: *crashes mom’s car into my yard*

Me: Be careful what you wish for I suppose

[sandersstudies]

Honestly my first draft of this post said “my neighbor’s son” and then I was like wait a second that’s functionally the same as saying “my cousin’s sister.” That’s still my cousin and that’s still my neighbor.

[sandersstudies]

Stop saying Calvin and Hobbes it’s important to me that Calvin is six and not nine.

[the-lincyclopedia]

I take it the nine-year-old was literally driving the vehicle?

[sandersstudies]

The nine-year-old was literally driving the vehicle after knocking the gear shift into Drive apparently by accident. Seven- and five-year-olds in the backseat. Nine-year-old knows in movies people stomp down on the thing on the floor and the car stops. He stomps. It is the gas.

[wolfythewitch]

Was gonna have a breakup brunch with my girlfriend on our anniversary but I got dengue so now we're doing it during pride month

[wolfythewitch]

Happy independence day

[wolfythewitch]

#Single#happypride

[depsidase]

[haunted-hideaway]

I’m glad that OP:

1) Figured this out.

2) Shared so others can learn from their mistake.

[best-of-inspirobot]

[tearlessrain]

this is in perfect iambic meter and sounds like the first line of a weird poem

[tearlessrain]

Rule #2

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you see one on the street,

For decorum is essential when a lobster you must greet.

You may comment on the weather, compliment his choice of hat,

But crustaceans like their space if one should stop them for a chat.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you’re strolling down the coast,

Simply nod and give a greeting, or a handshake at the most,

For a lobster’s first priority is formal social graces,

And one seemes over-familiar if a lobster one embraces.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you meet one in the sea,

For a lobster’s spines and chitin make it difficult, you see,

And he might become self-conscious if you bring that fact to light,

So don’t ever hug a lobster, simply put, it’s impolite.

[crisis-on-infinite-batblogs]

Bat Burger headcanons that no one asked for:

Bat Burger has always been open late, but in commemoration of Signal's crime fighting debut it began operating 24/7.

Condiment King has a vendetta against the Creative Director, Fatima Lòpez because she refuses to make a menu item themed after him or utilize his likeness in any way.

Villainous Venom is a flavor of Mountain Dew that is exclusive to Bat Burger. It does not contain any of the actual Venom drug, but it does have ungodly amounts of sugar and at least a few known carcinogens (but idk, isn't that true of all Mountain Dew??)

Maxie Zeus inspired a limited menu of Greek food including "The Gyro Gotham Deserves."

The shakes are actually really good for a fast food place and they have 52 different options for toppings, but the ice cream machine is always broken.

There's an urban legend about the burger patties having trace amounts of guano in them. The USDA has never found these claims to be true, but they have yet to test the Robin Nuggets so, who's to say?

Every hound can be a Bat Hound and take a bite out of crime with pup-friendly Bat Bones available in peanut butter, liver, and chicken flavors.

(Mostly I just wanted to show off the Bat Burger logo that I spent 3 hours rendering, but please feel free to add your own headcanons!)

[salonduthe]

Petroglyph depicting whales, Qaqortoq, Greenland, 2010.