screenshots dont do this justice
*inhuman clicking*

★
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

#extradirty

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
sheepfilms
NASA
we're not kids anymore.

ellievsbear
will byers stan first human second
almost home

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JBB: An Artblog!
RMH

@theartofmadeline
Misplaced Lens Cap
DEAR READER
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

Love Begins
styofa doing anything
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@buggritmilleniumhandandshrimp
screenshots dont do this justice
*inhuman clicking*
😻amazing, pt.1
Always need good news stories
Just some positivity, because we could all use some more of this in our lives.
Please let all of these be true and not made up.
I just researched all of these and they all happened except for number 9. The only other sources I found for that one were pinterest and reddit, and those aren’t really sources at all.
And I get a little bit Genghis Kahnghis I don’t want you to get it onghis Nobody else but me (ooooh) With nobody else but MeeeeMe
I get a little bit Danghis Dahn Don’t want you to Genghis on with Nobody else but Mingus Nobody else but Mingus Kingus
Can’t wait for Hozier to return and put his big bad bitch of the forest foot back down on ed sheerans windpipe
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Look yonder! Someone has writ upon that ceiling that thou art most easily gulled!
Elizabethan Peasant 2: More fool they, for I cannot read.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: *sighing, lowers his visage unto his palm*
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Lo, hast thou learned to read?
Elizabethan Peasant 2: Verily, and to compose as well.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: With haste, then, how is the word “i cup” composed?
Elizabethan Peasant 1: what ho, I know a sporting jest! What art thou when thou art a peasant and art occupied in a privy?
Elizabethan Peasant 2: I wist not, but certain am I that thou shalt tell me speedily.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Most verily, thou art a peon.
Elizabethan Child: Father, I have not yet broken fast and am filled with pangs of hunger.
Elizabethan Father: Hail, Filled With Pangs Of Hunger! Mine own name is Wybert.
anyone on these interwebs wanna talk about……… clowns?
Hey d'you want to know why some clowns are scary?
i am definitely apprehensive but sure i would like to know
So I learned to be a clown briefly in grade 7. And here’s the thing, clowning is taking the worst aspects of yourself and amplifying them to the point of hilarity (It’s quite good for self-esteem, actually). But here’s the thing, some people try to make their clown a happy clown when they themselves aren’t a happy person, and that is, technically, lying. And our brains are REALLY REALLY GOOD at detecting lies, so warning bells go off. And therefore we get scared.
TL:DR, the only scary clowns are the ones who are lying.
“the only scary clowns are the ones who are lying” is a mood and im not sure how but it really really is
oooohhhh
Ted Noten SuperBitch Bag, 2000 (Gun Casted in Acrylic, Snake-Skin Handle)
I know it’s the year it was made and not part of the title but i want it to be “SuperBitch Bag 2000”
we’re all getting “older” but age is a relative thing. i’ve licked things that are 250 million years old. you’re not that old and you’re not worth licking.
Clare this is by far the most terrifying post you have ever made
Is this person an archaeologist and referring to the “lick test” for fossils or does she go down on the old gods…?
In this world it’s yeet or be yeeted
yeeten?
this is a true ally
One of my favorite scenes from Letterkenny
This show hurts my brain
Can’t blame you, it’s like a shakespearian comedy about nothing, sped up, with the Middle English replaced by equally obfuscatory Albertan slang.
Excuse you that ain’t Albertan that’s the wrong coast. It’s Ontario slang.
Mark the electrician has been here for five minutes and he’s already said “well that’s…weird” twice from the other room and frankly I’m afraid to ask.
It’s not good when skilled tradesman are standing in the middle of your room pinching the bridge if their nose, is it?
Mark just referred to the wiring in our bedroom as “creative” and “interesting”.
This is fine.
And now he’s taking apart the ceiling. I’m not worried, are any of you worried? I’m not, haha, it’s not like this house was previously owned by someone who would do something stupid like try to wire their house themselves…or store tins of varnish under the furnace behind a secret alcove…
Ha ha…
Ha.
Hm.
Fuck.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE’S NO NEUTRAL WIRES??!?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S GROUNDED INTO THE SCREWS HOLDING UP THE CEILING LIGHT???!?!!
Don’t forget that you have rights today because of the courage of trans people fighting for gay equality.
In honor of me approaching my first 6 months mark as a flight attendant, here are some highlights from my time in this job:
When a lady stopped me gently to whisper that i had “mastered the art of kindness”
When an elderly woman told me i was “put on earth to be a flight attendant”
Each and every time someone complimented my nails
When i found an $8000 diamond watch left behind under a seat, gave it to a gate agent, only to have the passenger come running back 10 minutes later. Gate agent: man u wouldve been in trouble, huh? Man whom looked like a bond villain: i wouldve been SHOT.
Every lesbian ive worked with and had the nice bonding moment of “ur gay?? Im gay!!”
That time a man tried to get huffy with me because he wasnt in 1st class and i got to say “sir u can either sit in this seat or u can sit in a seat in the terminal while u wait to take the next flight”
When i had an emergency landing because the pilots lost steering and we all thought we were gonna die but then we didn’t and everyone just applauded the landing and didnt even complain about the 2 hour delay
When my flight was delayed for 3 hours because the plane wouldnt start so the crew and i just took a really long nap in the jetway
Every 4 and 5 star hotel ive stayed at for free
When we overnighted in the middle of nowhere in alabama and went to a sports bar at midnight. The bartender locked the door so it was just him and us and his friend, and we all got super drunk on obscure alcohols and i kicked everyones ass at pool
That time i had an emergency landing because one pilot had such explosive diarrhea that the other 2 pilots had to wear oxygen masks
When we overnighted in a casino resort in new orleans and ended up drunk on margaritas and playing blackjack with a bunch of old people at 2pm
Every little kid on my flights
Every dog i got to pet on my flights
When we were flying to nyc during julliard recruitments and half the seats were taken up by cellos
Being in airports late at night and seeing people sleep in the weirdest places because they just dont care (bathroom floors, under gate agent desks, etc)
When a woman forgot her actual baby on the plane
Woman: can i board first? Gate agent: are u special needs, active military or priority? Woman: no i just want to board first. Gate agent: maam i have 70 other people who also want to board first, im not looking for a line leader.
My very first working flight, when a man pointed to my necklace and said “is that a ball gag?” And, in my shock, i said “no, im gay”
That time a ramp agent came up to me holding up his phone and said “wanna see something weird?” and i said yes, reservedly, thinking it might be gross but then he held out his phone and it was just a picture of hundreds of paradise birds that we were apparently flying to a zoo
could you even imagine the first time males mansplained creation to women… “actually, we are NOT here because of an endless chain of mothers like you giving birth going back eons in time. uhhhhh no … not at all. it really started when my bro this all powerful dude who lives in the sky made the first man and then a dumb woman who was TOTALLY inferior to him. yeah it’s surprising but legit. the wind told me when i was jerking off down by the river. i can’t prove any of this but if you don’t believe me i’ll kill you”
This post is cool because, according to my biology textbook, until very late in the development of science, men actually thought babies didn’t even share their mother’s bloodline, only their father’s. I mean, how much do you have to twist your percepction to come up with this
What the fuck, it’s in the mom’s tummy
They basically thought that the sperm contained a full human being and the womb was just the place where it grew.
Men have always overestimated their own importance.