Nonsense

Brittany|20

[ultrafacts]

[moki-dokie]

It's about to hit us here in Oklahoma and the rest of the southern states that are not used to this level of cold.

Please take this seriously if you live somewhere this is going to impact significantly.

I just sincerely hope texas' power grid doesn't fail them again.

but at least a small blessing is that this isn't bringing much precipitation with it and the worst of it will be the wind.

Anyway. Stay inside, wear layers, and bundle up. Get your cold weather shit prepped now if you haven't yet.

[sztefa001]

0.0?!

[asingularcanadian]

This is "if you go outside you will have frostbite in minutes" type cold, this is "your car may not start up" type cold, this is "your schoolboard should be advising you not to send your kids to school by foot" type cold, i live in Ontario and I've only ever seen it get to -44C here.

If you are in this swath of area and have never experienced this type of cold before please take whatever precautions you can. in extreme circumstances like this the best way to do that is to isolate activity to one or 2 rooms of the house that have as few outward facing windows as possible, make sure you wear lots of layers and even insulate those layers by putting wadded up paper between them, keep your extremities covered, keep your face covered, if you have blankets or pillows to spare and non-carpet flooring lay those out to help insulate the room, you can hang bath towels in front of any windows to help absorb the cold. Please limit going out to as little as possible, and if you have to make sure anything that can be covered is indeed covered, if you have to wear denim please layer something underneath it, wear ur heaviest fabrics, double up on socks and gloves if you need to, if you can get thermal underwear you can always layer those. When in highschool and had to wait at the buss I would often microwave some potatoes or perogis and keep them in my pockets to warm my hands as I waited for the bus. Keep extra blankets and candles and clothes in ur car. For whatever reason if you get wet and you're outside, please find somewhere to get inside while you dry. If you live in an area that's getting this and you don't have winter clothes like scarves or mitts take whatever thick insulating cloth you can find and use that instead. it might not be comfortable but it will be better than frostbite, I promise.

This is the type of cold that also comes in insanely dry so if you are prone to nosebleeds this will be a problem. Make sure you have moisturizer for ur hands and lip balm so you don't end up cracked and bleeding on top of freezing, its a shit combo.

[dduane]

Please take this seriously.

[lesbian-toddhoward]

fun fact if you refer to children as "things" and use "it" when referring to children and are happy to see children cry and get hurt im stealing something from your house

[lesbian-toddhoward]

"what did he think was going to happen" i dont know considering the fact that this four year old boy literally cannot properly comprehend consequence

"and NOW she's acting like a victim *laughing emoji*" this six year old girl doesn't know anything about the world let alone how to process her emotions

like these are literal CHILDREN. they don't know shit about anything. hop off this cruel and edgy "i hate kids" train and go see a shrink asshole.

[changelingfangs]

Oh my fucking god, this. So much this.

I’ve had to fucking explain this to parents. Why can’t the baby stop crying? Because that’s the only way the baby knows how to communicate -- they’re trying to tell you something. Why is this child acting like the world is ending because they lost their favorite toy? Because they’ve never experienced loss before -- this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to them in their lives

Children have all the emotional capacity of adults and none of the experience in learning how to cope with it. A knee scraped for the first time is the worst pain a child has ever felt. Not getting to go to the park is the greatest injustice ever.

They’re responding proportionally to the event from their life perspective. Children actually don’t over react, like ever. They just feel everything so much and have so little reference to weigh it against.

[jaubaius]

Wii bowling be like…

[responsibilitychan]

[pewdiepieburglar]

I love Hideo Kojima he makes multiple games where characters give long winded monologues (that he personally wrote) about how US entertainment media is designed to manufacture consent for the military, and then he'll spend 3 days gushing about Top Gun

[pewdiepieburglar]

Kojima is very anti war, but also he has like a little kid brain where he just loves military hardware and spies and soldiers and he especially loves big machines that go really fast and make huge kabooms, and I think it's the tension between these two parts of him that makes his art so deliciously insane

[pewdiepieburglar]

[sexhaver]

[trupowieszcz-moved-deactivated2]

hey btw if you wanna read dracula in real time as it happens you can have the chapters delivered to you via e-mail by signing up here:

Dracula Daily | DraculaDaily | Substack

Get the classic novel Dracula, emailed to you in real time as it happens. Click to read Dracula Daily, by DraculaDaily, a Substack publicati

it's fun

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

@drukhari

[shego1142]

[Audio Transcript: I just want to talk about why I wear sunglasses as a blind individual.

I actually had one experience where I was at a barn hanging out, having a couple drinks and uh, because I’m blind I just stare straight ahead.

I didn’t realise that there was anyone in front of me, I was just staring and had no idea.

I didn’t know until a security guard came over and asked me to leave “ for being creepy”

Uh I stood up with my cane, because I didn’t know what was happening and I found out,

everyone started laughing and didn’t know like, that I was blind,

I guess what I was doing was staring at one of the bartender’s chests, and I had no idea.

So ever since that one time, I wear sunglasses now to kind of hide what my eyes are doing since I don’t control them anymore.

It was a very embarrassing… and Uhm made me really insecure about my eyes and that’s the reason I wear sunglasses as a blind person.

End Audio Transcript. ]

[snowie-skyes]

*watches this badass blind dude fucking make Tony Hawk proud af assuming he wears the shades cuz he’s cool AF*

*scrolls down to find the audio transcript*

….oh

[wet-monsoon]

i’m convinced that the ice age franchise won’t end until the squirrel that always chases after the nut gets an equally hideous girlfriend with Squirrel Tits™ and eyelashes

[wet-monsoon]

no….. No

NO

[claratyler]

No you don’t understand, I have this entire developed theory about the Ice Age universe which has been cooking up in my mind and has only be reinforced by the latest 5th installment. Scrat is the god of the Ice age universe. The story began with him and the story will end with him. If there weren’t hints before, in this latest installment, it becomes clear that Scrat’s actions dictate what happens on Earth and to the protagonists. Yes, maybe Scart’s only goal is to get the nut, but his actions SHAPE what happens in the film. If we needed any further proof then may I point out something Buck said in the 5th film along the lines of “we’re 6 mins early! Somebody up there likes us!” That phrase is usually used to refer to a god and in this case it’s used to refer (unknowingly) to scrat!

However, there is an ALTERNATE theory that I have been working on. What if Scart isn’t the god of the ice age universe, but rather, the NUT is? As i have already said, Scart’s actions shape the course of the story but what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut, it is truly because of the nut that Scart does what he does that leads to the events that take place in the story. This would create an interesting metaphor here. Scrat is chasing the nut like man chases divinity. So when will the Ice Age saga end?? When Scart finally gets the nut for good. When man catches God.

[wet-monsoon]

[busket]

i didnt even read this but im laughing at how many times scrat is typoed as scart

[creature-enjoyer29]

“what motivates Scart? That’s right: the nut” is the funniest fucking string of words I’ve read in my life

[thekittyokat]

hey so?

[ndelphinus]

“I live in the north of England, I’m used to freezing cold temperatures”

Oh honey.  That’s what the pilgrims said.  They mostly died.

[jewishdragon]

please please listen/read the transcript to Neil Gaiman on NPR’s Wait Wait Dont Tell me because he talks about this and it’s wonderful!

Here’s the main piece:

SAGAL: Why did you move from England, reputedly cold and dreary, to the upper Midwest? Was England not cold and dreary enough?

GAIMAN: Nobody had really explained the whole cold thing to me.

SAGAL: Really?

GAIMAN: Yeah.

SAGAL: It was a surprise?

GAIMAN: Well, no. I was arrogant. I was foolish. The English thing where you think you know it all, I thought I understood cold. I thought, okay.

SAGAL: Oh yes.

GAIMAN: Water gets white and fluffy and it falls from the sky. Puddles go hard and slippery. That’s cold.

SAGAL: No problem.

GAIMAN: I did not understand the acres, the depth.

SAGAL: Right.

GAIMAN: How much colder it can be. I didn’t understand what it means to walk out of doors and take a deep breath, the hairs in your nose freeze and you go, “Oh, it’s a little below zero.”

SAGAL: Right.

GAIMAN: And then that thing that you do when you walk out and you take a deep breath and you cough because it hurt and you go, “Oh, 25 below.”

[jabletown]

#true#apparently in American gods when shadow moves to the Midwest and almost dies because he’s an idiot and doesn’t understand how cold works#that was a self insert about NG moving to the Midwest and not knowing how cold works

yeah as a lifelong wisconsinite, i had never really seen my state truly represented in media until that scene the first night in wisconsin when shadow tries to walk somewhere at night and nearly freezes to death

there is a not insubstantial scene in the book where shadow winterizes his windows and i absolutely loved it

neil was definitely traumatized by moving to minnesota

[huffylemon]

[dykecostanza-deactivated2024112]

even if billie joe was straight (he’s not) teenagers getting offended he used the word faggot in american idiot 16 years after the fact would still be some of the goofiest discourse i have yet to see on this website. if you were young and gay in 2004 that shit rocked your world bc we were living through one of the most powerful resurgences of blind american patriotism and anti-gay evangelical bullshit of the last three decades. i dont think most of yall understand how radical that song, that album, and green day’s overall anti-bush pro-gay stance was for the time. even though we were at the cusp of bush becoming unpopular by the time it was released, american idiot saw a fairly mainstream rock band condemning not just him, but the bigoted, ignorant american culture which created him. to remove all of this context from the song and act like green day was just throwing around homophobic slurs for the hell of it is exactly why people joke nobody has reading comprehension on this website lmao. he’s not weaponizing the term; he’s using it to identify with an alternative american society.

[star-anise]

The lyric is:

Well maybe I'm the faggot America

I'm not a part of a redneck agenda

I don't know how to explain to kids these days what it was like to be young and queer in those days. People think I call myself queer because I've never lived in a small and homophobic town, never experienced violence or discrimination, don't know what it's like to have those words thrown at me with anger and hatred.

And it's hard to reach through the pain of those memories and say: there were no words for us that weren't slurs when I was your age.

I was 17 when this song came out. "Gay" was what the boys in my high school called anything they didn't like. "Pop quiz? That's so gay!" A (straight) girl in the drama club shaved her head for cancer and people started calling her a dyke. She didn't deny it, so her car got egged in the school parking lot and the eggs stayed there long enough to wreck the paint but somehow "nobody saw". The teachers and principal of my Catholic school didn't do anything about that, or about the abuse my gay friend put up with in the halls and every class except drama, because intervening would be "endorsing homosexuality." My gay friend got shipped off to conversion therapy by his family and I never saw him again. Conservative classmates tried to get the drama teacher fired, because she "wasn't supportive of Catholic values."

The only story I knew about gay people in a town like mine was The Laramie Project, about Matthew Sheppard's murder for being gay in a small town in Wyoming. That was the year I started but couldn't finish writing a play titled "The Lemon Tree" about two girls whose love for each other couldn't survive the homophobia of a town like mine, the same way a lemon tree planted there would be killed stone dead by its harsh winters. It was the year I decided to convert to Catholicism, because I had sincere faith and yes the Church was homophobic but having a real relationship with a woman was never going to be possible for me anyway so it wasn't like I was losing anything, right?

I didn't have access to the gay community or gay media, except through online slash fandom. A year later I found a second depiction of gay people in a town like mine: Brokeback Mountain, about two men whose love was smothered by society's homophobia until one of them was murdered for being gay.

(Now I know that kd lang and Tegan and Sara were openly gay in the 90s and come from my part of the world, although they all had to leave to be successful. Nobody mentioned kd lang's sexuality, and Tegan and Sara didn't get radio play here when I was young.)

And yes, "faggot" was worse than "gay". "Gay" just meant, you know, "bad", but "faggot" meant gay and soft and weak and about to get an ass-kicking.

So I remember those lines and when I first heard them all those years ago. I remember that I was cleaning my room and listening to the radio, and the DJ talked about Green Day's anger at cable news and the war in Iraq and played the song, and those two lines hit me, so hard I was incredulous and couldn't believe that for once somebody was on my side.

Green Day's image was tough and angry and loud, and it's an angry song—not unexpected, basically anyone left-leaning was angry about politics then—and them saying "maybe I'm the faggot" was them saying Come and get me. You can't scare me. This thing you throw out as an insult and a threat? Yeah, I'll own it, and I'll use it to lure you into punching range. You're wrong and I can fight you and win.

It was like a transmission from an alien planet. This was someone so much braver than I could ever imagine being. What that song said to me was that somebody was willing to stand up for me. I had viewed homophobia as an all-powerful cultural force I could either submit to or escape by hiding until I found a safe community, but pro-LGBT punk rock was what taught me that I also had the option to fight.

[dreamingofnoreality]

This is how we can defeat NFT bros

[angrypsychologist]

I have my PhD in Social Psychology and my area of interest is attitude formation and persuasive messaging. Something no one ever tells you is that embarrassing the shit out of morons is an effective and valid way to shut them the fuck up.

[schaduwen-deactivated20220817]

i post for the girls who were lonely and isolated during peak social developmental years

[sandmandaddy69]

[grldick]

I love the implication that they saw him getting raptured and they're still atheists, power move.

[sharkchunks]

Decreasingly scary grindhouse title cards

[blueelectricangels]

if you read in a frog paper “specimen was released in the field immediately after capture” chances are very good that what it actually means is

“i dropped the damn frog and despite the fact that we fell all over each other no one could recapture it”

[blueelectricangels]

sometimes when i am sad i go read through the tags on this post, because they are 70% other biologists saying things like “AND ALSO FUCK FIELD MICE” and “THAT CRAB ALMOST BROKE MY FINGER” and I am reassured that I am not the only one who has bobbled a wood frog right into their cleavage.

plus six or seven people who just….can’t figure out what a frog paper could possibly be. (guys it’s…a scientific paper. about frogs.)

and this one

which made me laugh despairingly because i mean

bro you don’t even know.

[jumpingjacktrash]

what is the code entomologists use for “i stepped on it, i’m so sorry, it was dark out and the specimen was very small”

[coolmanfromthepast]

“Impromptu dissection was performed under less-than-optimal lighting conditions.”

[jumpingjacktrash]

‘impromptu dissection’ is an alarming phrase in any context and i thank you for it

[inky-petrel]

What’s biologist for “the little fucker BIT me and I yote it into the undergrowth on reflex”?

[tawghasa]

“Specimen was removed from the study pool due to abnormal interaction responses”

[vilkalizer]

I am reblogging this 98% for the second to last comment holy shit I’m fucking choking

[elfwreck]

I’m enjoying the tags/replies discussing the proper conjugation of “to yeet.” I am in favor of the decision that the future perfect is “will have yitten.”

[woefully-undercaffeinated]

Expanding this, NASA has a few gems from their report language:

“Underwent unplanned rapid disassembly” – it exploded, and it wasn’t an explosion we wanted to happen

“Lithobraking maneuver” – it stopped because it hit the goddamned ground.

“Engine-rich exhaust” – the engine bell melted or evaporated, or the engine ejected itself out the back of the rocket without having a very good reason to do so.

“Fishing orbit” – the craft is in the ocean instead of space and we didn’t mean to put it there

“Thrust was observed along an undesired vector” – the engine leaked and the rocket spun off into oblivion.

“Wearing his manager hat” – a moron who shouldn’t be an engineer (a reference to the infamous quote “take off your engineer hat and put on your manager hat” in the meeting in which the Challenger was cleared for launch)

“Received an unrequested transfer” – he’s dead.

[kittydesade]

LITHOBRAKING MANEUVER