a random blog

hi guys! i’m mars, i’m 17 and i post a lot of random stuff if anything at all! my fav color is yellow and i go by they/them! :) come vibe w me lol :3

[bxcktovampyrs]

hi! this is gonna be my pinned post just for new followers and stuff!

some stuff abt me:

i’m marcellus/mars/marcel, i’m 17, i’m biromantic, demi-ace and i go by they/them pronouns!

fandoms:

marvel

supernatural

pjo

lucifer

the originals

miraculous

b99

teen wolf

game of thrones (books)

deadpool

shameless

i love klaus mikaelson, derek hale and peter parker and will happily go on rants abt them.

my favorite colors are yellow, gray and lilac and i love art that incorporates all three.

i have adhd and that’s abt it.

come vibe w/ me!

[bxcktovampyrs]

DIARY ENTRY 2

Oh my god I had the worst night ever but it was like not that bad? I sound so overdramatic and weird right now, I’m super drunk.

But, I met this dude at a music festival the other day and he’s like mid attractive but hella confident so he’s sexy yk and anyway I met him only bc I saw this rly hot girl at the festival and I went and asked for her number cuz she had such amazing vibes and then she introduced me to the people she was hanging out w and he happened to be one of them.

We hung out for like an hour (we being the group) and then I left and he and i did exchange info but it wasn’t in a flirty way, or I didn’t think it was? I didn’t get those vibes at least, and I made it clear I was interested in the girl.

Well anyway today he messaged me asking how my day was going and i was like yeah it’s fine haha and we texted a little and then he was like I totally wanna do a movie night w you sometime. And i was like um oh ok haha …. idk im pretty busy and then he was like well are you free tn? and i idk i was like yeah i am, lol and he was like ok i can get some pizza and we can watch a movie.

so anyway ig my survival skills finally decided to slowly kick in in the worst way possible and i was like yeah sure! but lemme bring my best friend. (wow genius, what the fuck is she gonna do she’s barely 100lbs soaking wet) but hey idk it made me feel better she was there. so i brought her and we went to his house. and ate pizza n watched the minions and drank wine.

sounds great right??? NOPE! the way this man wouldn’t stop hitting on me OPENLY. like it was so bad. he was like wow you have such sexy legs. and i was like um ok thx. and he kept bringing up sexual topics and making sex jokes which was so weird and they were so directed. he was at one point like, the hottest women are tall women. (i’m 6’) and i was like oh ok haha. and he was like idk it’s not a dommy mommy thing for me, i just love the challenge of getting a tall woman. WHO SAYS THAT WHAT

and he later straight up was like wow you’re so snatched, sorry i can’t look at you i’ll get a boner. HE WASNT JOKING

he wasn’t joking

he like hid his dick for the next four minutes

it was rly awkward

i’m gonna kill myself that was horrible

he drove us home and then after he dropped us off he like lingered before leaving which was so weird and then he texted me this weird text about how he’s super attracted to both of us and sorry if he made us uncomfy. and then he told me wanted to give me head.

like

said that

to me

what

the

fuck

ok diary, i’m gonna go jump off a bridge bye

[bxcktovampyrs]

Diary Entry 1

I've decided I want to start using my tumblr as just a public diary because ... well I honestly don't know but it's somehow easier to use a diary if I'm talking to the masses I suppose.

I've always kinda been such a performer, constantly thinking about how everything I do will reflect on me, what people will think, how they will judge. I feel like my life is just a big performance for other people. And it even effects how I journal. Whenever I try to start a diary I think about what people will think if they read it, how they will judge me, how cringey I'm being, how it's not a 'good' diary.

I'm not really sure what started this anxiety, I think everyone kind of has it to some extent. Maybe its from school, from getting our drafts read and edited and judged? I don't know. I can't really name one cause of it, but all I really know is that it sucks.

I can't do anything without that little voice wondering what people will think, how they'll judge me for it, how it's not good enough.

Like the joke, can I get an 'A' in therapy or whatever, that's how everything feels. Can I get an A in life. Are you watching world? Hypothetical future ancestors that might read my diary? Are you judging me or can I get an A?

It's so stupid, I know, but it really bothers me. I hate it. Ugh.

Ok, diary time. Journaling. Yay.

What does someone even write in their diary? Like, I never really understood that. Do you just write about everything you did that day or how you're feeling? Like what. I don't understand, tbh. I think I'm just bad at diaries.

[bxcktovampyrs]

romantic love is me texting my boyfriend “i literally want to be inside your rib cage right now, in a cuddly way” and he just Gets It™️

[bxcktovampyrs]

so i go to boarding school and haven’t seen nwh yet cuz i have no access to a movie theatre and dear god the amount of social media platforms i’ve had to avoid so i don’t see spoilers

[bxcktovampyrs]

lowkey miss my childhood

anyway currently convincing my crush all the reasons he should go to hoco w me

reason number one: i’m awesome and i come with free sarcastic remarks

reason number two: i’m hot and make a great date and can compliment pretty well

reason number three: see reasons one and two

reason number four: i’m a horrible dancer but i’m funny

[bxcktovampyrs]

he’s my boyfriend now so i see that the reasons worked

[bxcktovampyrs]

I HAVE DATING ADVICE

date someone who makes you laugh until you can’t breathe and is completely fine with your stupid thoughts and when you’re trying to tell a story and you’re laughing too hard to speak they start laughing too even though they don’t know what’s making you laugh

HAVE A GOOD DAY

[bxcktovampyrs]

lowkey miss my childhood

anyway currently convincing my crush all the reasons he should go to hoco w me

reason number one: i’m awesome and i come with free sarcastic remarks

reason number two: i’m hot and make a great date and can compliment pretty well

reason number three: see reasons one and two

reason number four: i’m a horrible dancer but i’m funny

[bxcktovampyrs]

i cope w my trauma by putting pretty things on the walls

currently: putting purple aesthetic photos on the wall of my dorm :)

zendaya 😫

it’s only semi gay guys it could be worse - i’ll update you when it’s done :p

[bxcktovampyrs]

it’s done it’s finished it took me three hours oh my god - ignore the gaps this isn’t pinterest :p

also, this is my wall before the photos:

[bxcktovampyrs]

i cope w my trauma by putting pretty things on the walls

currently: putting purple aesthetic photos on the wall of my dorm :)

zendaya 😫

it’s only semi gay guys it could be worse - i’ll update you when it’s done :p

[bxcktovampyrs]

i wrote my own autobiography - it’s eight pages long. it’s not about my full life just a part of it and now i am staring into the darkness thinking about the fact that absolutely no one will be able to read it and think i’m sane.

also i’m probs gonna publish it.

anyway, the things it contains

suicide

SA

ED

Supernatural

Horse Back Riding

Childhood Trauma

Feminism

How society has failed teenagers

Disassociation (?)

Anxiety

Honestly don’t know how I fit all of that on eight pages but you guys should be proud of me because it took me three days and i’m probs gonna send it to the head of the english department at my school and hope he just doesn’t tell my parents

signed,

a neurodivergent queer genderfluid sixteen year old

[bxcktovampyrs]

i met this guy on the plane and he was really cute? and we were sitting next to each other and he was watching me sketch? so i gave him the drawing i was working on and we started talking? and like we talked for three hours straight?? and usually plane rides go by so slow for me but with him it was just so nice and it was his first time flying and i just hit it off so easily with him and i fly so much so i gave him advice and we were chatting and idk man i feel like i met my platonic soulmate we instantly clicked like can you fall in love with someone at first sight platonically?

[bxcktovampyrs]

me: leaves house and is literally gone for two to three hours

my dad after i get back: oh i didn’t notice you left

me: …. what i‘ve been gone all day

my dad: you never leave the house anymore

me who literally was at the park for two hours journaling: tf-

my dad: all you do is sit in your room

me: IM LITERALLY GONE ALL DAY HOW DO YOU NOT NOTICE

[bxcktovampyrs]

i went to the doctor for a physical and they told me i was five foot nine, anyway i know for a fact i’m six feet tall so that was really funny

[ahsteria]

tag yourself ; cities

paris - soft smiles, blooming flowers, lots of sunlight, stories swirling in your mind, cursive letters, piercing eyes, whispers filled with secrets

new york - gives zero fucks about others’ opinions, perfect eyebrows, no sleep, a bit sad inside, huge equal rights activist, red lipstick, artsy af, string lights, lots of coffee, high waisted jeans

london - new ideas, old architecture, a soft voice, flickering candles, intelligent eyes, loud laughter, dancing alone in your room, big dreams, hot tea

montréal - comfy socks, french bakeries, lover of books, bold thoughts, wide smiles, kinda broken, cute jackets, warm hot chocolate, cobblestone streets

tokyo - aesthetic af, pen sketches, bright colors, bold fashion, small yet powerful smiles, striving for greatness, cute glasses

rome - loves museums, kind words, tangled earbuds, a bit in love, bright eyes, artsy photos, likes history, open windows, probably sings in the shower

[bxcktovampyrs]

someone please draw this

[mattmaesonnatural]

—

[bxcktovampyrs]

hi gay i'm dad

i'm walking around in sweatpants with my gay suspenders, I am now the perfect lazy and flamboyant gay, I just need to get my mini pride-flags and tie up my hair in a bun with them and tie my big pride flag around my neck like a cape.