alphabet soup

call me soup | she/her, bi, 19 | multifandom | FUCK AI | wearing cardigans in 40 degree weather

[so-many-ocs]

*voice of someone craving even the tiniest sliver of control* i could make a spreadsheet,

[dogpuppy]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the meaning of life? is to make your bedroom as comfy as possible. that's it that's the purpose

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the secondary purpose is to equip your kitchen and get really really really into international cuisine

[milligramspoison]

FUCK YOU LONDON. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

[hungwy]

We pwned noobs in a hopeless place... we pwned noobs in a hooopeleeess plaaaace

[filmnoirsbian]

I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.

[filmnoirsbian]

Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."

[filmnoirsbian]

I'm literally a flight attendant, offering snacks and drinks is my job

[this-is-a-name-dont-worry]

gshsjb

[cnmcn]

[chillyfeetsteak]

there should be more options than suffering via employment and suffering via unemployment

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS

[veryluckyclovers]

happy monday~

[autistobrat]

*completely missing where the pulse is* I think this chap is dead

[prohaloplayer-deactivated202601]

I think that ancient peoples had trampolines and razor scooters but they were extremely reserved and somewhat shy about them

[disco-machine]

anyone else absolutely guzzling the shit out of some wadder? a fucking boddle of wadder?

[mclennonyaoi]

[mclennonyaoi]

this is the funniest piece of graffiti i’ve ever seen. thank you mr two pens

[tulipseason]

a canceled tv show is a kind of dead wife

[greelin]

words like “charlatan” and “bastard” are so cool. but it is not good to be either of those things, supposedly

[walterdecourceys]

i'm gonna sob i went to pride and i passed this young kid (like 8ish) holding a whole bunch of nonbinary flags so i waved my own nonbinary flag at them and they absolutely lit up and waved back and then later they and their dad ran to catch up to me because they wanted to give me PINS they had drawn themself 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i hope every queer kid stays alive forever what the fuck

[walterdecourceys]

the pins btw 🥹