declan

20 | he/they | art tag | carrd

[cassadeir]

bear

[hoofpeet]

(In the cuck chair)(starts booing)

[hoofpeet]

(Wife looks over)(I do a roman emperor thumbs down)(she executes the other guy)

[spicyraeman]

“hes a woman to me” IS HE? or are you equating women with submissive character traits you've arbitrarily put on a random man

[aoelustious]

“he’s a woman to me” “ummm isn’t that kind of misogynistic? are you equating womanhood with submission—”

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK sorry i couldn’t hear you over the sound of me putting a fictional man in a slutty apron and calling him mommy. sorry. i was too busy hand-feeding him strawberries and then writing 12k of emotional devastation and domestic porn. sorry i gendered him like a little fucked up doll in a victorian nursery.

YES. HE’S A WOMAN TO ME. HE’S A HOUSEWIFE. HE’S A HIGH-FEM BRAT. HE’S A PRETTY LITTLE THING WHO GETS RAWED IN THE MOONLIGHT AND MAKES SOFT WHIMPERS AND BAKES BREAD TO COPE. AND I DO NOT CARE IF IT MAKES SENSE.

HE IS MADE OF TROPES. HE IS MADE OF VIBES. HE IS MADE OF GLITTER AND TEARS AND POST-WAR PTSD. HE IS WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT. HE IS NOT A MAN. HE IS NOT A WOMAN. HE IS A TRAGEDY IN LACE.

you’re talking about “misogyny” like i didn’t just write a fic where he gets folded in half by a feral beast of a love interest and then cries because he’s “too used to not being touched gently.” BABE. THERE IS NO DIGNITY HERE. ONLY CATHARSIS.

your academic thinkpiece cannot survive the heat of my horny little monkey brain. you want to talk about gender roles?? I WANT TO PUT HIM IN A COLLAR. I WANT TO GIVE HIM A GENDERCRISIS VIA DICK. I WANT TO MAKE HIM THE MAID AND THE MUSE AND THE MADONNA.

and also? sometimes i call him a manwhore for getting railed twice in one chapter and still being emotionally unavailable. because HE DESERVES IT. because I SAID SO. because it’s FUNNY and UNHINGED and that’s the POINT.

you are not fixing the world. i am not breaking it. we are both feral rats arguing over a Barbie doll in a trench coat. take your discourse and go. i’ve got work to do. i’m about to make him lactate out of spite.

[ex-riddlecats]

this is already an absolutely tone-deaf and borderline transmisogynistic response but i think it gets even more jawdropping when your blog makes it really obvious youre talking about alexander hamilton

[dampfnudeldove]

shot in the HEAD. and you're to blame. You are not good. At dart game

[talons-and-stucco]

Lets go All Over The Fucking Place with mama

[miiilowo]

in the minecraft world do youthink people would use "they dug straight down" as code for someone dying

[miiilowo]

inthe minectraft world they would say someone spawned with a diamond hoe insteadof saying they were born with a silver spoon

[chekhovs-slinky]

In minecrsft world they say “what the nether” insead of “what the hell” and alex is a butch lesbian

[miiilowo]

and alex is a butch lesbian yeah

[rapidlydecayingcorpse]

e

[helooproto]

[bonesbeetle]

they let the fucking skull wraith on the mound again. this is such bullshit i hate this league.

[heraldic-thunderbolt]

I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

In this economy you'll be lucky to retire to your nickels

[quinnception]

[bewbin]

in World War 1 around 8 million horses died but in World War 2 it was under a million which can only mean horses started to evolve bullet resistance

[txttletale]

im d class personnel at the scp foundation but im fine every time because they always put me in the control group

[txttletale]

whenever they send a guy to be tortured to death by the creepy demonic old man they send me to talk to a normal old man. to make sure its not the placebo effect

[electronicmail]

some of my friends are stem majors

[visenyaism]

Had to ban the phrase “tricky dick” from my classroom during watergate lesson because saying the word dick in front of 30 fifteen year olds is like lighting a bomb and throwing it through the doorway but now they’re just calling him Richard the Treacherous like they’re all medieval peasants. gonna lose it

[visenyaism]

[the-seelie-court-official]

you cannot fix that blond man please step away and let the professionals take over

[the-seelie-court-official]

ma'am please let the blond defusal squad do their jobs. they have better life insurance than you

[autisticmysticsarah]

The legend of King Arthur predates thinking

[weaselle]

that would explain some of the actions of the court

[memorycycle]

new transfer student

teacher: why dont you indroduce yourself?

unfolds my one angel wing and one devil wings (looks around the room)

class: *gasp*

shy girl: *blushes and looks Way*

[lizardsfromspace]

Catching people up on your life is so hard. They'll go "yeah so I got married and had three kids, who all got their medical degrees in utero" & you'll go "yeah, I hear that, I was busy being an Belgian-Australian singer-songwriter known for my #1 hit 'Somebody I Used to Know'", and then they'll say - meanly - "you are not early 2010s one-hit wonder Gotye. Why are you claiming to be Gotye" and they simply won't listen to you talk about how "one hit wonder" is actually a pretty reductive label for your discography

[samuelroukin]

they need to invent a writing that is easy. and fast also

[teaboot]

monkey paw finger curls and another AI generative text program is born

[samuelroukin]

nooo my good intentions

[blank0s]

Damn did you see that? That was fucked up, right? Anyway I'm Rod Serling.