[3rdeyechakra]

I reeeeally want him to get hit by a car.

[bantugal]

The annoying part is that other countries stereotype Americans as uncultured and disrespectful and there he goes…

[elionking-deactivated20191020]

Uggggghhhhhhh i hate white people

[caughtdeaddd]

I hate Logan paul like FUCK, and this was a post worthy of liking until you said ‘white people’ you racist cunt. He is a fucking stupid idiot, but by saying that is what all white folk are like, YOU are a racist spineless prick too.

[caughtdeaddd]

My first ever tattoo🖤🐱

[moonlighteternally]

[loveserum-deactivated20191021]

life is too hard. it’s too hard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i would like to be a cloud. 

[the-sky-traveler]

my brother is teaching his cat how to high five by giving her a treat every time she successfully taps her hand to his hand, which is all well and good, but now she thinks that she is entitled to food every time she high fives someone.  i can’t eat in the same room as her anymore because she’ll just bap my hand rapid fire and then go nyoom straight in for my pizza like no Kelly that’s illegal go finish ur own dinner

[anonymous-bosch]

“No Kelly, that’s illegal.”

[askragtatter]

So, a while back, I was using clicker-training to teach my cat Taz tricks. She learned very quickly and it was a good experience all around, but we had to hide the clicker.

Taz had learned that the clicker meant she got treats. So she would find it, carry it up to people, step on it to make it click, and then SCREAM AT THEM to give her the treats she was clearly owed because the clicker had made a sound.

[jinxtimesinfinity-deactivated20]

Cats

[wandering-tangents]

Pavlov is rolling over laughing in his grave.

[sludgebat]

[cronusamporaofficial]

BITCH I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU

[sludgebat]

[stabble1234]

YOU’VE ANGERED THE WRONG FANDOM

[sludgebat]

[lettucetherapist-blog-deactivat]

You’re going down punk, just you FUCKNG WAIT!! You will learn that this fandom is far worse than you will ever want to know. We may seem soft and shy, but we’re just being NICE! We can be cold, cruel, mean, and make you suffer and wish you had never said what you said. We can send you into the farthest most empty reaches of the galaxy, summon demons to our disposal to make you suffer, and make you feel the feelings that we experience, and don’t fucking think for a single goddamn second that’s easy! The amount of emotions that would boil inside of you would literally kill you. So keep your motherfucking distance and we won’t hurt you, so stay the hell back, asshole. If you so much as insult us one more time, we will bring firey hell upon you and bitch slap you into oblivion. Your move, dildo.

[sludgebat]

[alonelyangel6-blog]

We know how to kill a human and hide the evidence. Your body will never be found, and that is a promise.

[sludgebat]

[khajittink]

You do realize a majority of the fandom are 20 somethings right? or at least in college. We can find you, kill you, and make it look like you killed yourself. Don’t try us :)

[sludgebat]

[conchiolin]

Shut up. We can exorcise a demon from you faster than Dean and Sam, believe me you need it. We can toss you into a supernova, never to be seen again, or banish you to the end of the universe where you would explode to create a new one. We can murder you and destroy all evidence of you ever existing. Basically- D-O-N-T-C-R-O-S-S-U-S

[sludgebat]

[cats2019forthenintendoswitch]

This is like finding a lost family heirloom you’ve been hearing about

[lsleofskye]

Wind River Range

[caughtdeaddd]

business email glossary

thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press "send"

thanks for your interest: why'd you have to bring this up

would you be so kind: fucking do it

best: i have never physically met you

all best: this conversation is over

all my best: i wish you would die

happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox

i hope this helps: i've done all i'm willing to do

i did a bit of research: i googled it, because you're too lazy to

sorry to chase: answer my email

so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email

i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me

please contact my colleague: this isn't my problem

i'm copying in my colleague: this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it

i'll check and get back to you: i might forget to

i'll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to

can you check back with me in a week?: i'm hoping you will forget to

per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone

great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone

thanks!: i'm not mad at you

thanks!!: please don't be mad at me

thanks!!!: i'm crying at my desk

please advise: this might be your fault

kindly advise: this is entirely your fault

mind if i swing by?: i'm already in the elevator

can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email

sorry if that was unclear: i think you're an idiot

let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again

Reblogging to add a direct quote that I used today -

Please respect my work process: just do it the way I told you to and stop arguing with me, I don't care what you think

[littlemixens]

why do people say “don’t be a pussy” when talking about weakness more like “don’t be a man’s ego” because you know there isn’t nothing more fragile than that

[nothingnowherenoonearchive]

uh 

because “pussy” is the shortened form of the word “pusillanimous”, which means “timid, cowardly”

and not the slang word for the female genital region?

[follow-puppy-luv96-deactivated2]

literally no one else knows this. nobody. 

[definitelyshitty]

WHAT

[tyronesuplac]

Sensational.

[definitelyshitty]

Remarkable.

[geraltcirilla]

it’s a real word

[snarky-gourmet-deactivated20250]

you: pussy

me, an intellectual: pusillanimous

[pomeranian2]

[gothgfs]

ok: not wanting kids

not ok: having no empathy for children and thinking emotionally abusing them is okay

[teathattast]

[ithelpstodream]

Japanese photographer Hisakata Hiroyuki has decided to dedicate a fair portion of his time to shooting cats during their totally serious combat practices, and the result is purrrfect.

[noodle-dragon]

A smol awoo

[emiliotheexplorer]

This reduced me to tears

[witchyaquariusy]

This looks like am English Springer spaniel ♡♡ like my shadow boy

[noodle-dragon]

He’s a borzoi named Freddie and this is what he looks like now:

[candy-crackpot]

[duendealexis]

Wasn’t iCarly that guy with the wax wings that flew into the sun and fucking got rekt because same

[desire-vogue]

[americanwizarding]

These pumps, crafted by Mexican designer Lucita Abarca, caused quite a stir at a recent Sixth Borough fashion show. These crystalline high-heels were grown by Wyrm’s Pass artisans, deep below the Rocky Mountains, using a mixture of firebird ash, waters from the springs at Paradiso, and a variety of secret ingredients, rumored to include Australian fire opals and powdered moonstone. The result of using the firebird ash become immediately recognizable when the heel of the shoe is dragged backward across any dry surface, as it creates an impressive streak of magical fire which can be accurately aimed with a little effot. Ms. Abarca said she wanted a shoe that made a statement, and that statement was “Any bastardo brujo catcalling me on La Plaza de Sangre better be ready to dose his huevos, you know?” 

[ak-draws]

*high-pitched screaming* aaAAAARTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!

[demareth]

Me