치료자

press this LINK to hire a mercenary!

[cchilyoja]

WELCOME TO THE BLOG OF SEO JUNG HOO - from the kdrama HEALER! this blog is mutuals only + selective + private. while the character is obviously from a show and has its own canon that I follow, at this point he is as much mine as he is owned by the writers of the show. while I personally don’t have any triggers & am interested in dark themes, there will be no writing of r*pe, incest or pedo* as those topcis have no value to me & I find them odd to willingly write about. 

                     carrd.            wishlist.              open starters.               memes.

est. 10 january 2017 by delila (she/her) 30+, Eastern Europe + timezone is GMT +2 . 

IMPORTANT

he is a mercenary for hire, meaning that if we do not plot & ur character does not know him, you will be given an alias. 

themes that will be explored here: abandoment issues, social alienation, morality, selfishness, family, bad coping mechanisms, insomnia, criminal activity, capitalism, social anxiety, distrust of others. 

while he does all sort of crimes/illegal things. he does not kill.

that being said, while he despises the world, he hates himself more, and is aware that through the jobes he has done, he has gotten people hurt or killed, even though he has not done it with his own hands. 

there will be mentions of suicide and suicide ideations. 

you can also find me on my other children:

 HERE - Aleksander Morzova from Shadow & Bone

 HERE - a multi-muse blog from a variety of media.

ACTIVITY 

my muse is in charge of my activity, I am usually on one of the 3 blogs that I have, but some days I don’t feel like writing, I can be horribly fast or a complete slow poke, due to this reason, if we write, you do not have to worry about your speed ever. 

[cchilyoja]

to avoid loss of muse & so I can focus on writing, jung-hoo will be part of my multi at @luminescenc1e of course I will never delete this blog and will probably write on him in the future, but for the time being, if you need me, that is where I will be! <3

[agronzky]

⠀⠀⠀ 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒. ♡

"Do you remember, we were sittin', there by the water?"

"You learn my secrets and you figure out why I'm guarded"

"You are the best thing, that's ever been mine"

"You're the kind of reckless that should send me running"

"Gimme something that'll haunt me when you're not around"

"It's just wrong enough to make it feel right"

"You gave me roses and I left them there to die"

"But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right"

"I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind"

"This is surely not what you thought it would be"

"It seems that I was uninvited by your lovely bride-to-be"

"I lose myself in a daydream"

"Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?"

"You are an expert at sorry and keeping the lines blurry"

"And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors"

"You have pointed out my flaws again as if I don't already see them"

"Someday, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me"

"Trying to block you out, 'cause I'll never impress you"

"This is looking like a contest of who can act like they care less"

"How I was losing my mind when I saw you here"

"Why are we pretending this is nothing?"

"I won't let nobody hurt you"

"Remember that she's gettin' older too"

"Remember the footsteps, remember the words said"

"This was the very first page, not where the story line ends"

"I'll spend forever wondering if you knew"

"2 AM, who do you love?"

"I never saw it coming, nor would I have suspected it"

"You might have him, but I'll always get the last word"

"But no amount of vintage dresses gives you dignity"

"Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything and everybody believed in you?"

"I hope you remember today is never too late to be brand new"

"It's okay, life is a tough crowd"

"It's getting dark and it's all too quiet"

"But I still mean every word I said to you"

"Something keeps me holding on to nothing"

"So why did you go away?"

"There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions"

"But I never planned on you changing your mind"

"May these memories break our fall"

"Tell them how the crowds went wild"

"I had the time of my life with you"

"Strangers' silence makes me want to take the stairs"

"You never know what people have up their sleeves"

"People throw rocks at things that shine"

"I was playing back a thousand memories, baby"

"Is that the kind of ending you wanna see now?"

"I know that we could work it out somehow"

"He's not all bad like his reputation"

"Right here, wishing the flowers were from you"

"'Cause I've loved you from the very first day"

[shadowoftheforce]

JI CHANG WOOK behind the scenes of Arena HOMME+

[pctaldrunk]

“ - I’m really easy to please, promise. As long as it’s not chemically warmed ramyeon and soju on the hospital rooftop.” Her meal MOST DAYS as a resident running from one end of the unit to the other, constantly on the move - and that’s when she manages a meal. She realizes suddenly that she’s never had a WHOLE uninterrupted meal in this place - nor in fact, a lot of the time, recently - always running between surgeries and this world with barely a moment to herself or to slow down, and her body is definitely FEELING the force. Suddenly with the comforting warmth and drape of his jacket on her shoulders, she feels WEARY.

Still - the day’s not over yet. “ - Meat, definitely. Somewhere…further?” Off the grid, so they’re less likely to be interrupted. It makes her smile - even the things they’re worried about for a first date isn’t what one might normally be worried about. “I haven’t had a good meal in MONTHS. If any plot happens I vote we postpone it till I’m done gaining back all the weight I lost. And gotten ice cream after.”

[cchilyoja]

“ Leftovers and take out is usually the meal of choice for me, not really enough time in the day to go bar or restaurant hopping. ” There is a bit of bitterness there as he speaks, but not against her, obviously. It was just a simple mundane thought, maybe he would enjoy going out, maybe he wouldn’t, but he never did. Now, regardless of enjoyment, he felt like he needed to force himself into situations that he normally isn’t in. Most of the things that people tend to do, he doesn’t, his life being removed from society for the most part.

But he doesn’t let that weigh him down, not now, as he listens and nods, adding to what she is saying. She is also suffering because of this connection they have, even though they have no way of knowing why it exists in the first place. But she wants somewhere new, somewhere further, so he takes her to the subway, easier to move from one part of the city to the next, than going on foot. As they emerge, the streets are busy and the places they pass are mostly full, but soon enough they come across a nice place, or so it seems. There are plenty of people inside, but a few tables are still empty, so he moves her to a table next to the windows, easy to see people walking outside. “ Order whatever you want, it’s on me. ”

[hyunnjji]

@cchilyoja asked : ❝  see the thing about your plan is,  it’s not gonna fucking work.  let me do this my way.  ❞ \ ask prompts : always accepting.

it is funny how they never seem to find a common - ground regarding their methods. she remembered a time when he told her how she could do whatever she wanted, so as long as she doesn't get in his way. look at him now, reprimanding her for a plan that sounds... perhaps silly or maybe too much. hyunji, however, is strong - willed. her disposition is as unbreakable as the knives she would throw. she is not one who is easily shaken away from doing something grand if she has set her mind to it.

" you mean you don't like arson ? " hyunji tilts her head, wide brown eyes staring at him with a hint of innocence like she didn't just suggest blowing off her family home after years of not seeing them. " how are we supposed to put an end to them, then ? " there's a challenge, not that hyunji would accept any other suggestions though. she just wants to hear what he has in mind, but never consider it.

if her family is going down, it's going down her way ( with her. )

[cchilyoja]

It’s a familiar dynamic, the two of them. Always on opposite sides but somehow together in the end, with any kind of hijinks and shenanigans. Whether she wants revenge or mayhem, she can have both, but they need to be smarter than their opponents. “ I don’t care about arson because it has too many issues, we need to be inside the building, then we also need to get out in time, it attracts too much attention, government, and police, and it is not a guarantee that everyone will, well not get out. We need a more sealproof plan.

” It’s odd how he is the opposite of how he is with everyone else, with her. Somehow, he ends up behaving as the more reasonable one, which is not the role he usually takes. “ I don’t enjoy suicide missions, unlike you, I want to make sure that I can walk away from this if or when I want to. And we are going to figure out a better plan of action, and make sure that we have all our bases covered, you can agree with that, can’t you Hyunji-ah? ”

With a sigh, he reaches towards the bottle and pours them both a drink before he downs his instantly. The slightly bitter taste is refreshing, especially when having to talk about these plans with her. “ How about an explosion? Maybe a car or plane, depending on what they use to travel, as long as all the necessary people are there. It can be detonated from far away? A bit safer, not perfect, but it could work. ”

[wellfell]

 a girly giggle escapes her red lips , as soon as he scoops her up like a knight . above the ground and staring at him rather than anything else , with each step does her head sway from left to right . there are lazy strokes tickling his dark hair , twirling the smooth locks between painted fingers . a cheerful nod is given , making her forehead bump with his cheek on accident ; which she's kind enough to kiss better . her opposite hand pressed on his other cheek , a tender reaction her body gives to the alcohol in her veins . or just the truth , and she's free to show it now .

 that she'd burn the world before she'd let anyone lay a hand on him , or on a gentler note ; * she'd wake up to his face every morning and not get bored . ❛ oooh . you're so strong . ❜ comes an overly dramatic gasp , her legs swinging back and forth over his arm . she stops playing with his hair to move to the collar of his shirt instead , UNKNOWINGLY , just something to toy with and distract her already distracted mind — anyone could kill her right in this moment , everyone could , easily . and akina wonders if she'd like it , or hate it . how cruel it would have been to deprave her of this warmth she's clinging to like a greedy little girl ? ❛ . . . i wanna sit on your lap while you're driving too . ❜ a soft mumble , head resting on her shoulder as she watches the path he's stepping on . it's the most stupid thing someone could do , but she's stubborn . ❛ please . i won't distract you . ❜

[cchilyoja]

She is the most dangerous thing that exists in this world, for him. There is nothing and no one more cruel and more enticing. It is so absurdly easy to abandon every single routine, his entire way of life, which he has already done by being in Japan. There is a specific thing he does each day, it is mundane, but he still does it. Now, all he does is think of what she is doing, what she is feeling, where she is looking, what she wants, what she doesn’t want. As if his whole purpose had shifted without him knowing, and without him having any choice in the matter.

It’s thrilling and dangerous beyond measure. She has enough power to make him do and be anything she wants, and he is sure that MOST OF THE TIME she isn’t even aware of it. The old lady had called and texted a million times already, to say that she’s pissed is an understatement. “ You are doing this on purpose. ”

He murmurs looking down as she moves from touching one part to the next, each little touch against bare skin enough to make him feel hotter than he already is, but damn it all, throw it all away and just do what he wants. “ Well, since you’ve already promised to not be distracting, how could I say NO? ” They turned from the main street, cross a few shorter alleyways, and onto the parking lot. With one arm, he holds her in place while he presses to unlock the car, opening the driver’s seat door and slowly bending to sit them both down, her on his lap now.

Closing the door, Junghoo presses the button the start the car, maneuvering them so that they can fit, which they can almost too easily. “ We’re going to be home soon. ” Before the engine purrs bellow them and they dash away on the road, he turns his head to the side, pressing a kiss to her neck, before they are driving off.

[wellfell]

 he could be the best hitman in the world , most ruthless of them all , could kill a thousand men and not bat an eye . it seems , even a guy like junghoo had hidden horrors inside his head , or to be truthful , he couldn't be in this business if he didn't . her heart beats firm and reassuring , she waits for his breathing to sound normal before she takes her hand away from his grip to stroke his dark locks instead .

 unlike him , akina faces forward , watching her favourite show in darkness . something she wasn't paying attention to anymore . while her cheek rests on top of his head , akina closes her eyes . ❛ usually , it's the opposite . ❜ as he knows , sometimes business calls for blood and violence . and the woman barely tries to stop her hand from slitting throats . ❛ . . . did you have a nightmare ? ❜ he was never interested in anything she watched because horror movies didn't interest him anymore . nor true crime shows , nor the gorey stuff she watched with a giggle on her plump lips . her hands lower , to take a spoonful of her ice cream , letting his head rest on her shoulder as she mumbled with her mouth full . ❛ ever thought about making a movie out of your nightmares ? it'd be nice . could satisfy the horror movie enjoyers such as myself . . . would i play a role in it ? ❜

  📼 cont. : @cchilyoja

[cchilyoja]

She was trying to make it seem like any of this was normal. But even knowing that Junghoo didn’t want to do anything other than buy into this mundane way of dealing with their traumas. “ That would make me too famous, you know with this handsome face of mine, and then I couldn’t be anonymous anymore. My night errand business would be a bust. I’m sure we can find something gory for you to enjoy even without me making movies. ”

His life wasn’t terrifying as much as it was pathetic. Which was somehow worse. Taking his time, he didn’t move from where he was, head resting on her shoulder as she ate her ice cream. “ I think I need something stronger than that. ” Tapping onto the container she was eating from, he slowly got up, dragging his feet towards the kitchen. Sure, there were healthier ways of dealing with shitty feelings and moods, but that was not really his style, and why would he start now? “ You want anything? ”

[yeo-rims]

If You Wish Upon Me

[wellfell]

 ' i don't want to be the best ── ' her voice dies in the pit of her chest before it can come out . she always thinks her death will be as quiet as her birth , AS WRONG AS HER BIRTH , never something to catch anyone's attention nor their grief . sometimes though , he simply makes it clear he'll be crying over her grave one day like a fool ; she closes her eyes and leans into him . his cheek warmer than hers , lips soft on her bare shoulder . it's the firmness in his command that makes akina believe she was really going home . . . her hands dare to touch his sides before he's moving away . accompanied by the woman's gaze following , looking up like she's waiting for him to tell her to breathe again . the bartender was forgotten even before they exited , akina leaning into his warmth . it's not too cold , she doesn't care . ❛ mmm you smell so nice . . . ❜ comes a whisper mixed with a quiet giggle , akina's eyes close merely because she trusts him enough to catch her if she falls down . but that's not enough , she stops walking with a whine and pushes him away . ❛ carry me like a princess . i don't wanna walk . ❜

[cchilyoja]

Her moments of endless sadness and abandon show up and disappear so quickly, that sometimes he isn’t sure if he sees them or if it’s his own mind playing tricks. Maybe he wants for to be as sad and alone as he is, because that way she would never have the heart to leave him. It’s a fool's desire, a selfish one, but he still has it. The two half stumble out of the bar into the street, the cobblestones really are not doing wonders with her footwear. But the breeze is cool and refreshing and he feels like he can breathe again.

“ Like a princess, well of course your highness. ” Fully wrapping the jacket so she is almost concealed by it, Jung-hoo picks up easily, her body pressed against his chest, her face right to his left, at the height of his shoulder. “ The car is close, try to manage until then. ” He doesn’t care if people will look, which is the opposite of what he does in his life, of how he lives. But just walks slowly enough to enjoy the moment, how normal it is, and how happy it makes him.

[pctaldrunk]

cchilyoja​ // JUNG-HOO :

This was something that he had thought over an endless amount. Ever since she had informed him of his situation - existing within a comic book. Still, an idea that he had trouble fully wrapping his mind around. Jung-hoo had decided to rebel, or at least try to. His entire life, he was sure that his choices were his own, whatever those choices were. Whether he regretted them or didn’t, he DID make them. Of course, that was not the case. And to add salt to the wound, every painful moment was just a part of his backstory, used to further the plot. “ It doesn’t have to be action all the time, don’t the readers like it when there is also a bit of romance in the story? ” He had wrapped his fingers around her wrist, pulling her back towards him, not wanting her to be able to hide or look away. “ So what do you say? Are you going to accept my confession? ”

She presses her lips together, and considers it. There’s OBVIOUS reasons to refuse - the fact that they come from entirely two different worlds, the fact that there’s never any telling when she’ll disappear bac through the cracks, the very fact that all of this is a little - no, a lot - BIZARRE. But - his hand around her wrist is real, as is the emotion she feels, unbidden - perhaps it’s fairer to say that he has always been REAL to her - and maybe that’s all that matters. If this is simply rebellion against the narrative, if it’s because he’s looking for one REAL person outside the written laws of character settings to support and care about him, who he can invest similar emotion in - why stubbornly try to untangle it all, to figure it out so clearly? She’s simply her and he’s simply him - two people who’re suitably intrigued by each other in that way. If he dares to ask - then she thinks, she dares to accept. “…I think you should take me to dinner first, mister. Mortal danger tends to kill the mood of a date.”

[cchilyoja]

“ Dinner, I can do dinner. ” Who was he fooling? He hadn’t been on a date or taken anyone to have any kind of meal ever. Or at least he couldn’t remember ever doing it. Which obviously meant that the writer did not want him to do that. And if there was one thing that he would ALWAYS gladly do, is go against what he was told. “ Let’s have something delicious. ” He had no idea where he should take her, his fridge was filled with beer bottles and half-eaten meals that he had ordered from the same three places. But it couldn’t be that difficult.

To find a nice restaurant, could it? With one hand on her back, and his jacket already draped across her shoulders, Jung-hoo had managed to half-focus on some small talk and multitask by looking at his phone. The places near him were all perfectly fine if he was going by himself. But he assumed that she might want something more special, less sixty-year-old men slurping soup, and something more in their age-range. “ So anything special you have in mind? Meat, pasta? Something more Korean? ” They were outside, moving toward the main street, it was late afternoon, and he was sure they could walk by a place that would be perfect.

[lcvelja-deactivated20240209]

     " no drinking! okay ... maybe one soju, but that's it. i don't even ask you to drink as much, but let's go out and eat. it would be my treat for keeping me alive. " she smiled happily while she tugged on him so they could go.

[cchilyoja]

“ Why is it always one drink, and then the next thing I know, it’s the next morning…” He realizes that she had already started dragging him along, and his mumbling, half under his breath is more for himself than anyone else. “ Fine, eat and drink. Whatever, as long as we get off the streets. ” With the summer starting, people were desperate to be outside for as long as possible, and it was annoying.

[wellfell]

 ❛ it is not a trap . ❜ she hisses , there's a hidden layer of distrust beneath her anger . one that suggests she probably thinks that jung-hoo believes she's incapable of ruling her empire . feline-like eyes roll with irritation , putting her phone on the speaker and placing it on the table . she had to put on her diamond necklace . . . there's a long moment of silence between them . his words don't lack logic , he's as skilled in this area as her desire to bring down the men that's looked down on her . THE HEALER KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING ; but akina doesn't want him to involve himself in this . doesn't want him to dive too deep in this mess , it was supposed to be a simple assassination job and then him back in her arms . these men are brutal , even more so when they find out he's this important to her .

 tips of long fingers brush over her collarbone , under the glinting jewelry as she stares at her reflection with blank eyes . before closing them with a quiet sigh . ❛ . . . what if they catch you ? ❜ her voice had gotten quiet , too quiet for a woman who was screaming about dominance not a few minutes ago . even the thought of it is enough to make a shiver run through her spine . she sits on the edge of the bed , her voice closer to the phone now . ❛ please just ─── do the job and come back here . ❜

[cchilyoja]

It’s a smile or at least an attempt at it. His own arrogance isn’t far behind. Rushing recklessly ahead was in his own DNA, but he would be careful now, delicate even. If it was for her, he would be as quiet as still water. “ They won’t even know that I was there. You know out of everyone in this country, they are not expecting me. ” Being invisible is easy, but he knows the dangers, hence why he had pushed himself into this plan of hers. Something that did not involve him, but now it does.

There is some kind of sick satisfaction that he’d be there too, leaving a trace only he would know to look for. “ I’ll be back before you know it. ” As if planned, he almost whispers back, wanting to take the few steps across the room and wrap his arms around her, smell that familiar perfume and push their bodies as close as they would go.

But that would take time that they don’t have, and would make it all the more difficult to leave. So he does smile, more honestly, less of a grimace or a cockly grin, before he turns and walks out into the balcony. One minute there, the other already gone, the movement of curtains hiding his descent before he moves with the wall of the yard and then he is in the alleyway.

[townwxtch]

"𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥" 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘴. ↳ @cchilyoja said "aren't you going to say i told you so? "

❝I don't usually say, I think it. ❞ she offered a reassuring smile. ❝At least It's not as bad as I thought it would be.❞

[cchilyoja]

" Sure, it can always be worse. One of course could be dead, or dying. " Each word was dripping with sarcasm. " But still, we have to see what our next move is, so what do you think? "

[cchilyoja]

“   you  don’t  have  to  hide  your  tears  from  me .   ”

“ If I cry, will that make you want to take care of me? ” It was easy to joke, the easiest escape from anything really real, anything too close to the source of how he was feeling, a familiar route. If he could, he’d add that to his CV, able to wiggle away from any semblance of real adult emotion with a clever joke. “ I’m not gonna cry, even though my arm does hurt. ” He had patted his left arm down, there was still some lingering ache there, but nothing too serious, definitely nothing to cry over. “ I’d rather go and drink, what do you say? Nice way to end the night, don’t you think? ”

[cchilyoja]

"if you don't take your butt back to bed, I will carry you there myself." (Ni Huang)

It was an unusually chilly night for the time of year, summer had started, and yet the winds were still cool enough to deter people from wandering the streets out for too long. There wasn’t much rain and the crops that had been planted in spring were already suffering. But none of those worries really bothered him, if he wanted to or needed to, he could walk aimlessly and endlessly.

The rice wine had made him energetic, maybe more so than was custom for him to be, an unusual sight of a man that joked with purpose, not with joy. “ I would really like to see you try…” It was not proper to say, but in this brief moment, a small window of careless abandonment, Jung-hoo allowed himself to be as silly and incautious as he had once been in his youth. “ The night is still young, what is the hurry?”

[cchilyoja]

“ just listen to my heartbeat , okay ?? ” hheehe

He could feel the all too familiar tingles in his hands, traveling down his fingers. It was hard to remember the last time he felt like this, this awful feeling that pulled him back into the worst period of his life. And the more he tried to push it away, the more it pushed and dragged him under. Taking a breath, or at least trying to, his lungs never being able to fully inhale as much as he wanted to, Jung-hoo took one of her hands, counting the cute little design that was painted on her nails.

Over and over he would count the same thing, before moving to the next thing, counting random furniture, or window panels.  But her heartbeat or the steady rhythm that he could follow along with, made him finally relax. “ You really are a lifesaver, aren’t you? ” Managing a smile, he had rested his head on his shoulder, face turned away to the back of the couch. “ I’m better now, you don’t need to worry. It just caught me by surprise. ”