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@cephalopodysseus
You can just decide to buy a cane and start using one whenever btw. And it's awesome
If nothing else you're gonna be massively pissing TERF Kathleen stock off so that's a huge win right there. Do it out of spite š„°
It would be so awesome if her shit article makes several people get their first mobility aid. Direct opposite of the effect she wishes she had yknow
Look into rollators too, they're amazing
I know that sometimes the hesitation to use mobility devices is about how it looks, both aesthetically and in terms of 'am I a strong person, worthy of existing'.
Canes come in a HUGE variety of colors, styles, materials, and ways to decorate it. As long as it's the right length, sturdy enough for your weight, and has a non-slip tip there's a good chance it'll do for you*.
Additionally: there are a lot of assholes that don't want you to take care of yourself this way. People who use accessibility aids despite the social pressure not to and their own internalized ableism are powerful people.
Additionally additionally: You are not taking anything away from anyone else when using your own personal cane or rollator. You're just making it easier for other people to exist while using them.
Most importantly: Anyone who thinks accessibility aids are bad for you is a person who is not good for you. Fuck'em. *For tumblr contrarians: if you need something more specialized than the kind you see in the drug stores, you'll know it. Plus, those can also look cool.
A German friend of mine (usually a sub) was experimenting with domming me over text message while I was at a work sponsored lunch.
She asked me what I was eating and I told her "a hot dog with ketchup and Sauerkraut" and the idea of putting Sauerkraut on a hot dog so threw her for a loop that she completely dropped her persona
Apparently the German desire for control is no match for American food sacrilege
Basically.
Mentioned to my mom I'm asexual a couple months ago and today.... we got into the car and she hit me with, "So you use they/them pronouns now?"
I went, "What. no. she/her."
"How does that work? With she/her/hers and they/them?"
I stared at her. "What are you talking about?"
"Well you came out as-" and I said, "I'm asexual."
She replied, "Like an amoeba, I know."
"Oh. My god. No. Mom. It doesn't- it's not the asexual you learned about in biology. I didn't come out as a single celled organism."
With heavy relief, she said "Oh, it has a different meaning?"
"Yes, mom."
"I have never seen a cat that showed affection/love for it's owner" is the pet ownership version of "I don't believe in Female Orgasms they don't exist, after all, my wife has never had one"
My fellow goths need to STOP associating gothness with pale skin RIGHT NOW. Goths can be brown, goths can be Black, and goths can be dark-skinned. Acknowledge this, respect this, and make goth spaces inclusive of brown and dark-skinned people or die by my sword š¤ŗ
Can i add that emos need to do the same?
YES. THIS APPLIES TO EMO AND SCENE COMMUNITIES TOO.
Hear motherfuckin hear.
I think fandom analysis on the whole would be a lot more fun and interesting if it took the sort of attitude a great many of my lit professors did, and the idea was to look at the text, see what you think it's saying, or even COULD be saying, and let's fuck around with that idea. I got four years of hearing insane takes on stuff and I was extremely fortunate to go a school with small enough class sizes and a dedicated enough faculty that in many respects, wild theorizing was encouraged.
One of my professors was straight up like "I don't want you reading papers about this book until we finish it!" and we had writing things for the first 20 minutes of every class because he wanted to know what WE thought, not what we had become convinced was THE thing to think.
When I was in my second year of college, I spiraled out into this whole "Jane Eyre is a lesbian!" thing, and my professor (not the same guy as above but delightfully insane in her own right) was like, "Wow, I've never heard this from anyone," and instead of being like, "um this is not what has been agreed upon by everyone else" went "Tell me more." Now, as a forty year old woman who has never stopped engaging with stories on both an enjoyment and academic level, the paper I would write with age and distance would be more "Homosociality, desire, and the domesticated male in Jane Eyre" or something like that, nineteen year old me was a little reductive and simple, but same vibes.
But my professor did not think I was right, she thought I was being INTERESTING, and so she encouraged me and championed me to write that paper and I actually presented it at the student division of a conference! The cool thing about that was, that when I was defending it, I was having to think about it, but it was in the spirit of collaboration, it felt like. No one was trying to 'win' the conversation.
Doc, what the fuck are you--I saw a really interesting thing this morning, someone talking about Shrek, of all things, and how they thought it was about how you cannot turn an ogre into a man, but he can make you become an ogre. And I immediately went, "Wow! Okay, interesting, not how I read that at all, TELL ME MORE." It was really jarring for me, then, to see pretty much every comment be like, 'uh you are wrong and also stupid." Sure, maybe that's not the intention of the work, but I don't for one goddamn motherfucking second think Charlie Bronte was sitting down going "I am going to write a woman so gay..." nor do I think the read of her as same sex-attracted is the end all be all of interpretations. It's mine, for sure! But like...talking about stories is supposed to be fun and it's supposed to be about possibility.
That one post got me thinking about how we are, in fandom often all looking at this same text, and there's immense pressure to have a 'right' interpretation--I was at the nexus of so many Sailor Moon fandom wars, and while I got into a few tussles, I was also stupid to do that. This characters are not real, and I was shutting down POSSIBILITY. And even after I was like, 'Wow, I don't think this is actually a very fun way to do stuff" it turns out you can't magically give everyone the same revelation you have simultaneously. Which is upsetting. And I see these same patterns repeat over and over and over again.
In my old age, I'm less interested in he "He would not say that" and more interested in "Cool, tell me why he would say that?"
Don't misunderstand me, there are points of view and ideas on different texts where I'm like, "Hm. I don't care to engage with that." Remember that the window we're looking out of is as important as what we're looking at, and will DOUBTLESS change the appearance. But the whole reason we have each other is to try and find other windows! It's not actually to find someone who is the next pane of glass in your same window. I miss that environment, where you could trust that everyone coming to the table was engaging with the same ground rules and that there was an expectation of, detachment doesn't quite get to the heart of what I'm talking about, but we were expected not to take the text or the analysis of it personally, even when it was hard. And sometimes it was. But I think it led to me having--for example it's crazy to me to have one 'right read' on any given text. I had a SUPER FUCKING ANIMATED conversation with a fellow lit nerd about whether or not GdT's Frankenstein was emotionally faithful to the text (which is not the same as being literally faithful nor the same as being good)and it was so fun, EVEN THOUGH we were coming at it completely opposed. But it was so fucking fun.
I wish I could do that with anime and cartoons, but you can't. People take Shrek personally. So I'll never have that same fun.
ANYWAY SORRY I AM DRINKING COFFEE AND MY DAUGHTER ISN'T HERE I HAVE TOO MUCH FREE TIME.
#yes absolutely and I thought this was the point#and an activity where you defend your position or disagree with someone else while fully engaged in what they have to say#and not thinking they are stupid or ''wrong'' or anything#because seeing what other people get out of stuff is????? the most fun???#its great#fandom Via @dufferpuffer
Source
A reminder that a universal basic income actually drastically improves the lives of everyone involved
OP: "I've seen lion dancing and dragon dancing before, but this is the first time I've seen realistic lobsters fighting clams."
GIRLS THAT'S FUCKING TERRIFYING,, PLEASE FACTORY RESET YOUR PHONES GET NEW ONES IF YOU HAVE TO GET AN INDEPENDENT SIM card WHAT IS HAPPENING
I'M BEGGING YOU
THEY CANT DO THIS TO YOU PLEASE
that is stalking
its stalking when it happens to children also btw
"My mum won't let me" Okay I am 30 goddamn years old and I still have this thought so let's walk through it together.
What's the worst that can happen if you do it anyway? Genuinely. The literal worst. Catastrophise about it with me for a sec.
Will your mum yell at you? You're an adult. Yelling at fellow adults is Not Okay Actually. (Yelling at kids is also not okay but let's take this one step at a time.) If your mum is yelling at you, a fellow adult, she's the one being weird and out of line. You asked your friend and they said so too (me. I'm the friend.)
Will she cut off your phone plan? That would be a problem. Can you look into whether you can afford to switch to a new plan she doesn't have access to? Most phone companies will let you port your number over pretty easily.
Will she cut you off financially? Run the numbers again. Can you afford for that to happen? If the answer is no, that's okay, I believe you and I know you're making the best decision for your own well-being that you can in the moment. If there's anything you can do to make it more affordable, I do suggest doing that, though.
Will she be physically violent, inclusive of breaking stuff that belongs to you? Thatās assault. That's a crime. It's not okay for her to do that and she almost certainly knows it.
Will she stop talking to you? Honestly I gotta say at this point that's not sounding like a bad outcome. It sucks. It really really sucks and I'm sorry if that's a choice you're having to make, but take it from someone who's been there and done that: when someone who is being abusive to you (stalking is abuse! Yelling at you is abuse! Threatening to cut off your funds if you don't do what they want forever is abuse! Breaking your stuff or physically hurting you is abuse!) decides of their own volition to cut you off, it hurts for a hot minute, and then you suddenly realise that you can breathe, and it feels so. Goddamn. Amazing.
Delete the tracking application. Live where you want to live. Change your name. Join or leave the religion. Get the piercing or the tattoo or the surgery. Live your life, because it's yours and not your parents'.
We'll try together, okay?
actually while iāve still got this soapbox stuck to my shoe i also wanna say i think culturally we gotta start conceptualizing physical fitness as a productive hobby rather than an obligation
itās sort of like clothes. thereās a baseline level of involvement with clothing necessary to stay safe from the elements and participate in society. having a variety of different clothing isnāt *strictly* necessary but pretty tangibly helpful. knowing how to do some minor mending and tailoring is nice. once you get into sewing your own clothes, youāre in hobby territory. if youāre making your own textiles from scratch, that is not only definitely a hobby but not something you can expect other people to want to do
the sort of nonsense fitness influencers get up to is sort of like people showing off their homemade silkworm farm and then pointing at everyone else and going āwhatās YOUR excuse for wearing a TSHIRT from the STORE???ā and actually nvm that would be fucking hilarious. god i wish that was an actual thing can you imagine
#everyone making new yearās resolutions like āiām cutting out polyester and iām going to build a spinning wheel by mayā
actually while iāve still got this soapbox stuck to my shoe i also wanna say i think culturally we gotta start conceptualizing physical fitness as a productive hobby rather than an obligation
itās sort of like clothes. thereās a baseline level of involvement with clothing necessary to stay safe from the elements and participate in society. having a variety of different clothing isnāt *strictly* necessary but pretty tangibly helpful. knowing how to do some minor mending and tailoring is nice. once you get into sewing your own clothes, youāre in hobby territory. if youāre making your own textiles from scratch, that is not only definitely a hobby but not something you can expect other people to want to do
the sort of nonsense fitness influencers get up to is sort of like people showing off their homemade silkworm farm and then pointing at everyone else and going āwhatās YOUR excuse for wearing a TSHIRT from the STORE???ā and actually nvm that would be fucking hilarious. god i wish that was an actual thing can you imagine
#everyone making new yearās resolutions like āiām cutting out polyester and iām going to build a spinning wheel by mayā