[chapmansicecream]

this space is an archive

2008 - 2023

you can still find me ~ @jinx96119

[prettypinkpastries-deactivated2]

Everything works out in my favor no matter what. I am in control. I am powerful. I have complete control over my life and nobody can tell me otherwise.

[chapmansicecream]

what i tell myself after my daily mental breakdown

[schlarklezyaoi]

it’s all “be gay, do crimes” until an unabashedly queer person actually breaks the law. i’m starting to think some of y’all would consider jaywalking morally reprehensible

[schlarklezyaoi]

what be gay, do crimes is: identify in ways that confuse people. identify in ways that piss people off. be contradictory. be unabashedly queer. break all rules of gender conformity. steal from corporations. trespass. attend protests. attend riots. throw bricks at cops. vandalize. destroy hostile architecture. do back upon the world the hostility it has inflicted, but be kind to those who have suffered alongside you.

what some of you seem to think be gay, do crimes is: have a nose ring and loiter outside your local spencer’s

[etacarinea]

Guys please stop calling hot people “daddy” or “mommy”. Sigmund Freud is getting too strong and is trying to break out of his casket.

[just-shower-thoughts]

when your pet comes to you from another room, the preceding moments meant that they were alone somewhere and thought about YOU, an animal brain literally thought about you and came to you to see what you were doing. that’s love, unconditional.

[severedhumanear]

it is fucking critical that gen z kids rediscover the idea of posers

[letstalkaboutthehusband]

posers AND sell outs !!!!!!

[topaz-luckdragon]

[kkobrakidding]

[image id: a reply by @cursedpearls that reads: This isn't about children being "fake fans" or whatever, this is about influencers trying to grab at ur money through pretending to be part of a subculture /end image id]

[theheroheart]

Just to be clear, this is not a shitpost or a joke. This 22 year old has in fact been appointed mayor of the Welsh town of Bangor.

Source tweet: LINK. A news article: LINK.

[americanbeautiies]

can we please appreciate their t-shirt though holy

[ID: A photo of Mayor Owen Hurcum, a person with bright green hair. They are smiling and holding up a white mug with a rainbow symbol on it. They are in a black t-shirt that reads, in white letters, THEY/THEM/THE MAYOR]

[guerrillatech]

[ranmagender]

ive been buying more stuff on bandcamp because it supports indie artists way more than spotify

[meridianowl]

reminder to buy on bandcamp fridays!

these specific friday events (that do not happen every friday, it varies)?

artists get 100% of what you pay for their work. On bandcamp friday all proceeds go to the artist.

[joematar]

bandcamp fridays are usually the first friday of every month though right now there isn't one until August 6th, 2021. though this Friday 6/18 they're giving all the money they usually take to the NAACP Legal Defense Fund

also I'd be remiss to not rudely stick my bandcamp on here under this info

[monmouth-manufacturing]

and even if you don’t buy stuff on bandcamp fridays, bandcamp still pays artists 80-85%, whereas spotify only pays artists less than half a cent per stream.

so if you like listening to someone’s music on spotify, also support them on bandcamp if you’re able to!

[phoenixyfriend]

I don’t want to end Amazon, because it provides an incredibly useful service to the disabled community, the elderly, and those who simply don’t have time to go shopping due to working three jobs and the like. There currently isn’t a major alternative on the market that is the same level of cheap and accessible.

What I do want to do is enforce some goddamn antitrust laws on major web-based companies like Amazon and Google and Facebook, and roll back their attempts at monopolizing entire industries, and make them pay their lowest-rung workers a fair wage and stop running their warehouses like a scene from a dystopian nightmare.

[theskepticalwitch]

You don't have to believe in deities to be a witch.

You don't have to believe in spirits to be a witch.

Hell, you technically don't even have to believe in magic to be a witch (meaning you can practice spells and rituals for their psychological benefits not their metaphysical ones).

You don't have to believe in anything you don't want to believe in.

If something seems way too out there for you, that's 100% okay.

I would rather have someone not believe in something on their own free will than be forced to believe in something.

[sepulchritude]

I’ve cracked the code. Next time you correct someone on your pronouns and they respond with that generally positive but slightly defensive vibe like “oh sorry, I’m new to this so it’ll take me a while” just hit em with one of these:

“No worries, I’m practicing at reminding people and you seem like a safe person to practice with”

Boom. Took the perceived blame off their shoulders and made the connection for them that being corrected = being trusted. Rinse and repeat. It’s also not a lie, correcting people on my pronouns is stressful and personally I really am super cautious about it

I figure some angry people will jump into the notes on this one so let me clarify: trans people do not have to be nice or coddle cis feelings. Some of us like living low-conflict lives though, so get off our dicks about it

[sepulchritude]

Cis people if you would like to avoid having this interaction in the first place, try “thank you for correcting me”

[tikkety-tok]

[homopower]

SCREAMING

[ftmfml]

AUDIO DESCRIPTION Cashier: “Is that everything?” Customer: (referencing the person coming in the shop door) “I don’t know, is THAT for sale??” Blue shorts hottie: “Oooh baby, I’ve GOT a husband…”

[naamahdarling]

You have to mention that EVERYONE in this clip has a country accent.

[halftruthsandhyperbole]

Today I learned

[ouijubell]

Free Audiobooks and Ebooks on OVERDRIVE.

Free Graphic Novels (DC, Marvel, Image, etc), Music, TV shows, and music on HOOPLA.

Free music that you can KEEP on FREEGAL

You are PAYING for all this with your tax money - USE THEM. Most likely systems will have all 3 or 2 out of 3, so if you aren’t sure call your local library’s reference/information desk and how you can get set-up or started.

[horrorinthegraveyard]

Hey, highkey from a library worker: 

Overdrive has a new mobile app called LIBBY I find it easier to use.  It’s the same content as Overdrive just better for mobile.  Overdrive and Libby both let you send items to your kindle as well.  

[tusks-and-tonics-deactivated202]

Can confirm Overdrive is amazing. 

I work in the largest library system in my state (17 branches in total).

I use it not only for ebooks, but movies as well.

Other FREE resources to check with your library for are:

Freegal Music (download and keep music, including current music)

Hoopla Digital (borrow ebooks, e-audiobooks, e-graphic novels, stream movies)

Kanopy (stream movies; also available on Roku!)

Axis360 (usually hot or just released ebooks)

If you don’t have a library card…

GET ONE!

If someone says libraries are a thing of the past…

BOOP THEM IN THE NOSE WITH YOUR KINDLE!

Don’t discount libraries as “quiet” places. 

THEY ARE ALIVE!!!

THEY ARE LOUD!!!

THEY ARE YOUR DOORWAYS TO KNOWLEDGE!!

[petermorwood]

Libraries are GREAT.

Also, when you borrow a book from a library, it generates a tiny payment for the author. Every 6 months or so, @dduane and I get money deposited in our bank accounts; it’s not much, but it’s enough to pay for a utility bill or an order of groceries.

[kroseteaches]

Today, on this fateful day in sex ed, I have to teach 25 9th graders how to put condoms on wooden dicks without losing my composure. Wish me luck lmao

[kroseteaches]

Now to find a way to discreetly transport this entire drawer to the other side of the building...

[kroseteaches]

Today went well overall. Lots of great conversations took place alongside some... very silly ones lmao.

Here are some highlights from this morning’s lesson:

Me: *removes the wooden dicks from my bag and slaps them on the table*

Students collectively: o_O

That one student: nice

—

Me: *demonstrating how to put on a condom*

Also me: *puts it on wrong the first time, even though I practiced twice beforehand* So everyone, here we see what not to do. Let’s try that again

—

Me: *finished demonstration, holding a sheathed wooden dick* so what questions do we have about condoms before I unleash you all to practice on the models?

Student: *raises hand* yeah, I’m wondering how you’re feeling about your life choices up until this point?

Me: o-o

—

Student 1: *raises hand* miss, why are the condoms so... slimy?

Me: thats lubricant, it helps get rid of friction that might cause discomfort during intercourse.

Student 2: *raises hand* can you use lube on a slip and slide?

Me: *genuinely considering the possibility*

—

*during a conversation about excuses people have heard for not wearing condoms*

Student 1: I had a guy tell me he was too big to fit in a condom

Me: *opens a condom, puts entire forearm inside and pulls it up to my elbow* here’s why that’s not true

Student 2: I once saw a video of somebody that put an entire watermelon in a condom before, so unless that dude’s got a watermelon shlong, that’s cap.

Me: *slowly losing composure behind my mask* you have the right idea, but let’s refrain from using the word ‘shlong’ in class, please.

—

Me: what are some ideas of things we can say to people who try to pressure you into having unprotected sex?

Student 1: tell them you don’t want their penis cooties!!

Student 2: penis cooties? Pretty sure that’s just herpes

Me, internally: like... you’re not wrong

—

Me: alright everyone, time to return the wooden models up front. Remove the condoms by firmly grasping the base of the model and sliding it off. Don’t forget to throw it away please!

Student 1: FIRMLY GRASP IT

Student 2: idk if I can return it now, miss. I’ve become attached to mine(the wooden dick)

Student 3: yeah, most men are

Me: *trying to keep a straight face*

—

Student 1: miss, why are the wooden dicks so shiny when you take the condom off

Me: oh, that’s just the lubricant from the condom.

Student 2: so you know you put the condom on right if your dick is shiny after?

Student 3: yeah! If your dick is shiny, you’re doing it right

Me: *trying to keep my composure pt. 36716159* uh, yeah that’s not necessarily the case. You see, these models are wooden. Penises are not.

Student 3: then why is it called morning wood?

Me: *internally self destructs*

—

Me: *casually wiping off the lube from wooden dicks w/ a paper towel before returning them to my bag* so what questions do we have about the use of contraception?

Student: miss can you please not make eye contact with us while you do that?

[graftandgrief]

Eating while on shift is not permitted, staff are told. “If the system detects no keyboard stroke and mouse click, it will show you as idle for that particular duration, and it will be reported to your supervisor. So please avoid hampering your productivity.”

A training video about the webcam system, seen by the Guardian, says it “monitors and tracks real-time employee behaviour and detects any violations to pre-set business rules, and sends real-time alerts to managers to take corrective actions immediately”.

Capitalism is so exhausting

[upsettingandunfortunateclasshate]

Fuck this

[lesbiansandgayssupporttheminers]

This is insane.

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

Capitalism is so innovative /s

[thestoryofaslut]

Hi!  Want to completely fuck the keyboard-tracking system in the ass?  Want to do it in a way that they literally cannot do anything about without disabling primary Windows functions?

Step 1: Open Notepad.

Step 2: Copy the following text, line for line, omitting only the --- that caps either end of it. --- Dim objResult Set objShell = WScript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell") Do While True   objResult = objShell.sendkeys("{NUMLOCK}{NUMLOCK}")   Wscript.Sleep (6000) Loop --- Step 3: Save this as whatever.vbs, put it somewhere you can access easily, and double click it when you start your computer.

What does this do?

This runs a very basic script, and every six seconds, your computer will double-tap the NumLock key (i.e., turn it on, and then off) in a single instant.  This counts as a key-press, occurs with a key that shouldn’t affect most things that you’re doing, occurs with no gap between them even if it could affect things you’re doing, and should prevent this kind of BS from engaging.  As an aside, this will also prevent your computer from automatically locking itself, so take that into account if you need to manually lock your computer when going to lunch or whatever.

[grucose]

Damn, Tumblr back at it. Now we got coders coming in to save the day.

[barin-mclegg]

Tumblr’s collective hate for capitalism is astounding every time but damn if I don’t love it

[simonalkenmayer]

For all my call center readers.

[dumbasscats]

A true captain goes down with his ship

Via Reddit

[randomslasher]

these are some of the most delightful laughs I’ve ever heard

[bryceslahela]

now that george floyd’s murderer is behind bars, let’s help support the people who helped with the guilty verdict as well as george’s family. the fight is hardly over.

darnella’s fund - darnella was the young woman who filmed george’s last moments.

gianna’s fund - george’s daughter who has now been left without a father.