kermit stan

home of the milfs

[depsidase]

[ireniggg]

I fuck wit title-only text posts. this shit is like talkin in an apartment hallway loud as fuck out the window

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

[raccooninapartyhat]

[ID: two denim patches with raised red fabric paint pinned onto a jacket. The first is in uncontracted Braille and reads, "I can't see shit". The second is in contracted UEB and reads, "if you can read this stop touching me". End ID.]

Shout out to my friends for inspiring some of the funniest patches I could possibly put on my jacket

[kristina100000]

2030 this has been my dashboard since 2018

[0-0nanika0-0-deactivated2014092]

ahh ahhh i’m roatating it

in my midn it’s beautiful

*puppy dog town*

*puppy dog village*

***cuppy dog city***

i wanna go  I wanna go ahhh

[valtsv]

death as neither a kindly figure nor a grim spectre but as a funny little skeleton running around brandishing his scythe and going "i'm gonna getcha! i'm gonna getcha!" in a gremlin voice

[greelin]

yes yes you’re very beautiful. Bewitching, even. AWFUL parking job, by the way

[cheddarslut]

absolutely furious the seven letter word was ‘subtext’ and not ‘buttsex’

[tim-official]

got my new boyfriend from Ikea. Unfortunately he's made of particle board and with a single thrust of my hips I broke him into five pieces

[crazy-brazilian]

[radiofreederry]

[pupdotcom]

your honor, in my defense: who cares like omfggggggggg who cares???????????? like. come On

[striders]

me staring at my calculator app for 45 seconds before i remember i was trying to open my clock app to set an alarm

[c4min4]

Mr president. we added 300,000 jobs this month. but they were all. blow jobs

[thecollectibles]

Art by Ungfio

[valtsv]