A Smiling Blog @cheshiresden312 - Tumblr Blog

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loptrcoptr

I have never laughed at anything in my life as hard as I laughed at this fucking bracket

ultrafacts

Source: [x]

Follow Ultrafacts for more facts!

plaguedocboi

In case you’ve ever wondered what being an environmental biology student is like

arealghost

So I went to the Josh Fight

a summary:

- Two Josh Swains were in attendance. OG Josh, hailing from Arizona

- And Nebraska’s own Josh Swain, from Omaha.

(feat. An Audio Engineer doing THE MOST for that sound quality)

-All the local news stations were there

- The majority of attendees were from out of state

- The two Josh Swains battled for supremacy by Rock Paper Scissors duel.

- The victor? Josh Swain, from Arizona. A crushing defeat for Josh Swain, who despite having none of Josh Swain’s newfound Twitter Clout, DID have the home team advantage, as well as a Great Look.

- Following the Josh Swain Duel and coronation of the One True Josh Swain, there was an All-Josh pool noodle battle royale

- A brief list of notable Josh Variants I saw in this battle:

Josh Swain (Prime)

Josh Swain (Secondary)

Medieval Josh (full chain mail armor)

Spider Josh (x2)

“Josh Wick” (had pool noodles mounted to two electric drills for spin-attack capabilities)

Furry Josh (A Josh in a fursuit)

Big Josh (A large man with the words “Big Josh” painted on his bare torso, and “Dad Bod” painted on his back. Armed with pool noodle wolverine claws)

Little Josh (A small boy of about 5 years old)

Luchador Josh

Roman Centurion Josh

The rules were simple. Enter the ring and fight honorably (no headshots, no hits below the belt.) If you are hit with a pool noodle, you are dead, having fallen in glorious battle. The last Josh standing would be the winner.

The battle lasted a little over sixty seconds in total. The final victor was….

LITTLE JOSH, THE SMALLEST COMBATANT.

The crowd was going wild. The chanting for Little Josh was deafening. Truly there could have been no better outcome.

pool noodle combat was then opened to the general public, for fun rather than glory.

As for Josh Prime, he was like a very cool dude! As of last reporting, he raised $6600 dollars for the Children’s Hospital and a truckload of nonperishables for the local food bank alongside the other Josh Fight attendees! He offered masks to any maskless people he met, and did his best to keep things as safe and socially distanced as he could, despite the ungodly amount of people who showed up to this random fucking field outside of Lincoln, Nebraska.

(Also for the Nebraskans: Yes he tried a Runza, and yes he says he enjoyed it.)

So anyway. Shoutout to the one and only Josh Swain.

miggylol

iridessence

If you don’t have anywhere to wear a very specific piece you have in your wardrobe, grab a friend or three and host a “soirée.” Get some $5 sparkling wine or grape juice, some cheese or cocktail onions or grapes if you don’t eat cheese and make a Playlist and just walk around one of your homes being fancy together. It’s nice to go out but if you can’t, don’t let that stop you.

queerpontmercy

i just got soirée and séance confused and the last two minutes were a bit distressing

iridessence

Honestly? Invite your ghost friends too. They probably have hella looks to serve.

shinydiscopaul-deactivated20200

@editorincreeps

editorincreeps-deactivated20180

Beautiful and incredibly important.

Give the events names, give them themes, make them reoccur.

I have a friend that I see 3-6 times a year for “Dracula Breakfast.” We meet at a diner and drink coffee and I eat waffles and she eats eggs and we talk about Dracula. Then other things. Then monsters in general. Then back to Dracula.

For about 2 hours, then we schedule another Dracula Breakfast and go our separate ways. This is our only form of communication because we’re both introverts who like to spend time apart.

There is no other standing appointment in my life that could rival Dracula Breakfast.

We exchange tiny gifts occasionally (almost always something we’ve made and nothing that is ever more than a few dollars). I’m always 5 minutes late. I usually do not sleep the night before to try to make it on time and I inevitably fail ever. Single. Time.

I ramble.

Fancily.

And you should too.

just-shower-thoughts

It was kind of a dick move to create animals that require air, then confine them to the freaking ocean

water-based-introspection

If you are talking about dolphins they used to be wolf like creatures that due to scarcity of food they had to hunt in water so they slowly evolved into water mammals, dolphins still have claw bones but they are unnecessary and dolphins will get rid of them with time and will develop abilities to breath under water

(This also partially applies to whales)

actuallyjuststealingmemes

They were what now?

oppa-homeless-style

island-delver-go

thedevilsofficialblog

Mother Nature, come out here I just want to talk

defydamage

columbojumpscare

Whales are actually Ungulates, more so hippos, entelodons, etc…

Meaning they were somewhat related to big celebrities such as Daedon (the “hell pig”) and Andrewsarchus.

The appearence of the first ancestors of whales probably looked like a small hoofed thing called Indohyus.

(Illustration by julio lacerda)

(illustration by Tiffany Turill)

Basically they went from tiny hoofed herbivore to bigger hoofed carnivore to crocodile-like thing to seal-like things to big sea predators.

bogleech

It’s important to mention that we now know dolphins will probably never need to develop true water breathing, because the fact that they breathe air from the surface is actually an ADVANTAGE for them. They get more oxygen at once than an animal with gills and it permits a much higher, more energized activity level for longer periods of time. They are murderous monsters empowered by their access to the forbidden air

hairenya

@ evolution turn on your location I just wanna talk

konayashi

muppethole-deactivated20240312

i feel like too many people have forgotten how to be a generous audience when they read/watch something. like sometimes you have to buy into some bullshit plot points or a deus ex machina or a few loopholes as the price of admission for an otherwise fun time. sometimes these things are just gears that get us to where the story really wants to be, and too many people get caught up in those gears. sometimes you gotta meet a story halfway.

kitikattt7

2008 was a better time…

mako-reaper-deactivated20230311

That one time the whole nation got rickrolled but no one was mad about it bless

justplainsomething

#I KEEP TELLING PEOPLE THIS HAPPENED#AND THEY NEVER BELIEVE M E

thathealeygirl

OH YES this was BEAUTIFUL

askjennaflorida

Happy 8-year anniversary to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade that got Rickrolled

cell113

Oh my god I totally forgot this happened-!!

oneeyeone

This may be the most important moment in human history.

intj-confessions

Every writing advice thing ever: Don’t get bogged down in details on your first draft. Just write! ☺️

Me: How I begin this scene hinges on whether cheese sandwiches were served with mayo in the 50’s.

colourfullmess

have not seen anything more relatable today >.<

wufflesvetinari

let me link the world’s most useful twitter thread.

some excerpts:

there’s nothing to stop you from using the <get there> method for research details. in fact, i know many many writers who use it for just that.

big-ass-magnet

I think it was @theherocomplex who introduced me to this concept and saved my life. You can use it for more than just scenes. When you can’t think of a word, or you need a name or a detail, instead of breaking the flow to look it up and risking getting sucked into a wiki spiral, put it in brackets.

I couldn’t think of the word “specialized” , but instead of hitting the breaks to wrestle with a thesaurus for ten minutes, I put [specific, tailored to one situation] and went on. Then when I had time I could go back to my note, see what I’d wanted to get across, and remember the word.

It has saved me so many times.

raevenlywrites

I do the same thing when I’m getting more faster than I can write it down. Most of my first drafts look like:

“I cant just do that, Liselle!” [Beat to show his agitation. “You dont just bespell people when they do something you dont like.”

[Liselle makes a rude noise]

“Maybe you don’t.”

[Fall out from that action, showing dude has been rolled].

I ride that train as far as itll take me (about 3 paragraphs max usually), then I go back and fill in all those beats if I’m still feelin it, or leave it for later revision if I’m not. I try to leave enough detail that I know what I thinking when I wrote it (ex. Shows agitation, show fall out, etc), but this is how I manage to write so very much. I ride the inspiration til it dries up, and have plenty of “grunt work” to do when I’m not feeling particularly inspired.

one-time-i-dreamt

I didn't know bucket toothpaste was only a thing here!

one-time-i-dreamt

WAIT! How do people in other countries put toothpaste on their toothbrushes??? You d-don't use your toothpaste spoon????

one-time-i-dreamt

You keep your toothpaste in condiment tubes???

one-time-i-dreamt

This whole thread is making me so sad 😔😔

one-time-i-dreamt

nameless-glitter-official

For the americans out there, 1kg is about 2lbs. Rewriting this bost gives:

"To answer a lot of people's question: this package is [4lbs] there's also, [10lbs] and [20lbs] ones (which used to be sold in most stores, but you can find them only in specialized ones nowadays). There are some tiny ones, like 1lb! Those are the ones you buy to carry when you travel."

Croatians apparently take a pound of toothpast with them when they travel.

I now live in fear of the Croatians.

one-time-i-dreamt

prokopetz

The ultimate power move in a vampire/fairy rivalry would be the fairy inviting the vampire over for tea. The vampire has natural dominion over anyone who invites them into their home, the fairy has natural dominion over anyone who violates the laws of hospitality, and neither can refuse the appointment without showing weakness, so it’d just be a constant headgame of the vampire trying to manoueuvre the fairy into a position where the obligations of hospitality allow the vampire to eat them, and the fairy trying to trick the vampire into doing something that would allow the fairy to declare them a poor guest.

lynati

You know EVENTUALLY they’re going to get hit with the magical equivalent of being snowed in together, right?

guardiankarenterrier

is that not the point

brunhiddensmusings

next paradox -faeries have power over those who eat fey food -vampires have power over those they feed on even should the vampire successfully bite the faerie theyre still at square one

krystal-prisms

Schrodinger’s hospitality rules

kingtcholla

MY BIRD IS SITTING IN THE TOP CORNER OF HER CAGE CALLING MY DOG’S NAME AND ASKING IF HE WANTS A TREAT AND IF HE WANTS TO GO TO OUTSIDE AND HE’S TOO STUPID TO REALIZE IT’S HER SO EVERYTIME SHE SAYS SOMETHING HE LOOKS AT ME LIKE

SHE LAUGHS EVERYTIME TOO AND NOW HE’S JUMPING ON ME AND BARKING AND GETTING MAD AT ME LIKE OLIVER TURN AROUND AND LOOK IN THAT HUGE ASS CAGE AND BEG HER FOR A FUCKING TREAT OR SOMETHING.

kingtcholla

NOW SHE ASKED IF HE WANTS TO GO FOR A WALK

SOMEONE HELP.

kingtcholla

NO OLIVER, IGNORE ECHO. NO ONE IS HERE

I PROMISE.

kingtcholla

I’M 1000% DONE.

“OLI GO CAGE.” NO OLI

DON’T.

GO.

CAGE.

starsfallinreverie

birds straight-up fuckin with other pets is my jam

otherwindow

An mmorpg where you can play as a vast range of tiny fairies (tooth fairies, pixies, etc) and the areas you adventure into are human sized towns but because you’re so small it’s all gigantic. Also, the player housing options are bird and dollhouses to accommodate your fairy size.

Sewing needles, keys, and screws are used as swords. Knives are treated like greatswords.

Tooth fairies get a racial ability where they can summon a gold coin to beat the shit out of rival fairies with.

Decorate your mailbox home with designer furniture from Barbie dollhouses. Turn an aquarium into a beach getaway. Freezers and cooler boxes are miniature winter wonderlands.

All of the enemies are either rival fairies, insects, or basic wildlife like hostile toads trying to eat you.

One of the dungeons is a dusty house with the final boss being a deadly roomba with a knife taped onto it.

interdimensional-chaos

It has a powerful air attack that sucks the fairies either into the black or close to its blade.

mens-rights-activia

rainbowrecesses

Advice I wish I would’ve followed or been given.

crowsandcooks

And you can still do it now

bethanyactually

fun fact: one of the best ways to keep your mind sharp is to continue learning new skills as you grow older! it’s never too late to learn how to make your own clothes or resurrect the dead or grow beautiful flowers.