Back in the Robot @churchoftheshinji - Tumblr Blog

this poem is about being nonbinary.

My version of "doomscrolling" nowadays is just going to iNaturalist, browsing pictures of animals and fantasizing about where I would introduce them outside of their natural range if I was some kind of ecology-focused evil scientist. I do this when I'm depressed. I don't know if it helps.

i-love-hyenas

Bring hyena to Texas put Texas in hyena paws humans can trust Texas to hyena pack yesss

headspace-hotel

How could I disagree with such a trustworthy source

chekhovs-raygun

animals i really want to introduce to the USA:

-red pandas in Indiana, Kentucky, and Ohio. they can live in those you-pick orchards and delight tourists, and in the winter the big ones can be harvested by the farmers for food and fur. america also has native bamboo, as well as plenty of escaped invasives.

-koalas in southern california. we already have a lot of feral eucalpytus in the state and it makes our wildfires way worse. let's put koalas in there too. coyotes can hunt them like dingos do.

-cheetahs in colorodo, wyoming, nebraska, and oklahoma. we had cheetahs here once, that's why pronghorns are so fast. let's give them something to really haul ass about.

-spotted hyenas in texas and new mexico. did you know there's actually a shit ton of oryx already roaming around new mexico? they were brought in for a game preserve. oryx can fight off lions, but spotted hyenas are actually superior pack hunters with some of the highest kill rates of large cooperative predators in the world. we might have a problem with ranchers, but like: fuck ranchers. they already decimated the mexican wolf populations. they deserve hyenas.

-pangolins. i would drop these guys in arizona honestly. everyone in arizona hates and fears fire ants. i think entire neighborhoods would throw ecstatic parades for pangolins (which smell much better than giant anteaters) at least until a pangolin dug straight through their pasteboard condo.

-new zealand's little penguin in louisiana. they burrow into mud and sand banks during the day and tolerate quite hot temperatures! i think they'd do fine, and louisiana is sliding into the gulf anyway. let's have penguins there. i'd also try them out in new england in case lousiana is just too swampy for them. i feel like new yorkers would go insane with pride over having penguins around. they would act like they invented the whole concept of penguins. we should let them.

-water buffalo. georgia and the carolinas. i just think it would give everyone there some interesting new problems.

-i firmly believe that asiatic elephants would do great in the southeastern united states. it's a subtropical climate that's only going to get swampier as things heat up, and there's plenty of kudzu and tall grass species for them to munch on. they're also smart enough to learn to navigate and negotiate with people, and to follow set routes around human farms rather than tromp through them, so disruption to existing human infrastructure would be minimal but occasionally hilarious. i think it would be so cool to have an american subspecies of elephant. if i ever win the lottery this IS what i am going to be doing with my millions.

derinthescarletpescatarian

Animals I would introduce to each continent:

Europe: Wombat

We've had enough of your fucking rabbits and foxes. Here, have a huge badger type thing that can destroy cars with its arse. It'll outcompete your badgers and where will you be then. Haha.

Asia: Wombat

We've had enough of Indian camels ruining our deserts. Here's something to ruin your terrain for a change.

North America: Wombat

We've had enough of United States tourists with no manners. Here's some tourists with even less manners.

South America: Wombat

WE'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR FUCKING CANE TOADS. WOMBATS FOR YOU.

Africa: Wombat

The feral ostriches aren't actually all that much of a problem right now, but in revenge for the problem they will probably become in the future, have some fucking wombats.

Antarctica: Wombat

I'll take it right back home and warm it up I promise I. I just really want to see a wombat walk and dig in the snow.

Australia: Wombat

The populations of all three species of wombat are dangerously low.

hollowedskin

Let This Man Undermine Your House

anarchopuppy

"dont feed the trolls" is an even more important rule in an age where that troll is likely to be a chatbot trained on bad politics crawling tags specifically to waste ur time. do not engage

moghedien

What do you mean the Kyoshi Warriors look like Kyoshi but fight like Rangi

skarchomp

glitched areas in 3d games: bizarre but serene, like being in a wide awake dream world, where physics and logic are only theories, and everything seems so confined and yet you’ve never felt more free

glitched areas in 2d games: welcome to hell! welcome to hell! welcome to hell!

skarchomp

prokopetz

The concept of himejoshi fromsoft enthralls me. How many kinds of barefoot level up maiden can you really have in a game? Like logistically there has to be some kind of diminishing returns before you have to start inventing mechanics

(With reference to this post here.)

Conveniently, the optimal numbers for mechanical synergy fuckery and matchmaking drama fuckery both line up at exactly five.

prokopetz

#care to share sources or reasoning? #less doubting more I would like to understand (via @dragoninthelabratory)

From a mechanical synergy fuckery standpoint, three archetypes almost always falls into a facile rock-paper-scissors arrangement, and it's surprisingly difficult to prevent four from decomposing into a pair of dyads. Five is the smallest number that reliably allows things get interesting in potentially non-obvious ways.

From a matchmaking drama fuckery standpoint, there's a fairly hard cognitive limit on how many pairings your average player will be able to keep in their head before some relationships start to get short shrift simply because the player forgets they exist. Assuming all possible pairings are valid in some circumstance, five candidates produces a relationship graph with ten edges, which is very close to that limit.

Funnily enough, the former lower bound and the latter upper bound just happen to be the same number.

prokopetz

Canadian bilingual packaging is fun because you get to see how various slightly odd idioms end up being translated by people who don't give a shit. I just saw a tub of double chocolate chip ice cream where the English label says "death by chocolate", but the French translates literally as "chocolate until death", which has a somewhat different vibe.

prokopetz

#there are so many cases i see when the english packaging has a pun for a tagline #and then the french is just a poor translation EVEN THOUGH an equivalent pun can be made (via @souplover13)

Occasionally it's the other way 'round, though, and the French is clearly the original pun. There's a brand of cheese sticks at the local co-op where the English tagline on the packaging is "cheesetastic!", but the French is "fromidable", which is so much better it's faintly offensive.

morguesupplier

busty-shackleford

choose abortion

Life kills!

prokopetz

One of my favourite things in urban fantasy literature is when an author clearly likes the idea of wizard boarding school drama, but wants to avoid getting any Harry Potter stink on them and tries to accomplish that by simply bluntly inverting all the stuff they regard as problematic, and in so doing independently reinvents the X-Men.

evergreen-femme

had to share this

terra-nightgale

OMG I CAN HAZ TUMBLR

so yea, i made a blog and now i need to post stuff XD

flareonfloof

omg finally

terra-nightgale

i’m going to blow up everything forever.

lessrthanthree

fission-mailure

A lot of people are ragging on the 'cable diverted to avoid Dobby's grave after Harry Potter fans raise a stink' thing and while I also love ragging on Harry Potter fans being weird, in this case it looks like the story was completely made up.

tl;dr: There's no evidence the interview that this was mentioned in even exists, no evidence the route of the cable has ever changed, and the whole story seems to originate from one dude's podcast.

The story also broke into mainstream via the Daily Mail, who are ... rarely if ever honest or accurate.

devilleworship

saw this on Insta and the idea that people who are anti-AI are just using it anyway like... willing to give it up? I ACTIVELY AVOID THAT SHIT BUD! WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT?

ALSO

It's not as if this shit has been around SOOO LONG. We all existed JUST FINE before this shit became THE THING someone decided to shove in our face like...

bolasaurus

Dude, I wouldn't even fucking notice until I go to Google something and the search actually works again.

serenitynerd

The only reason I would notice is my life would suddenly get easier

leiflemmon

Heyo! Just wanted to say that, as someone who's been around smokers my whole life and who's also struggled with gambling, this is addiction talk.

I'm not saying that as a riff on this guy posting, either! This is not an insult. This is a heads up about a genuine red flag.

If you cannot imagine yourself getting through even a single workday without your coping mechanism, you are struggling with addiction.

If you cannot imagine ANYONE ELSE ever getting through a single workday without also using your coping mechanism, you are severely struggling with addiction.

That's one of the more heinous parts of AI. Yes, it destroys the planet. Yes, it results in jacked up RAM prices and loud data centers cropping up like weeds in neighborhoods. But it is also literally addictive to use if you're stressed out by work and seeking an easy source of dopamine, reassurance, and companionship.

THAT is the real concern with this post.