[NOT A PROFESSIONAL WITH A DEGREE. PLEASE CORRECT ME ON ANY ERRORS, I AM LEARNING.] he/him. masc terms only for me. trans man + intersex (more info in pinned). will not tolerate bigotry of any kind. NEVER let yourself become "one of the good ones", and NEVER LET TRANS UNITY DIE.
hi my name is jordan or robin, i don't really have a preference but i typically go by jordan offline and robin online
my pronouns are he/him ONLY, and please only use typically masculine-based terms (i.e. "man", "guy", etc) for me. you do not need to know the details of my transition or my body.
(this section has been updated) i am a transgender man, and i identify as intersex due to an edge case condition that impacts me significantly enough to alter my life and how people perceive me. i, however, am not a reliable voice for every intersex experience, and do NOT speak on behalf of others. rather, i use my position to learn about the experiences of other intersex people, especially those who were forced into corrective surgery
I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL THEORIST OBVIOUSLY i'm just some guy in his early 20's who's throwing his hat into the ring so please don't blindly accept my opinions as fact. or anyone's opinions, for that matter. but especially that of a guy who's just now learning things and sitting solidly upon Mount Stupid of the Dunning-Kruger graph
i'm here to learn more about and give my thoughts on gender studies, as well as develop my own hypotheses, theories, and opinions. i would love people's input on their experiences, especially if they don't match mine. i want to learn as many sides as i possibly can to get a big-picture grasp on the concepts of gender, sex, and everything else that may be discussed here
this blog will be entirely focused on subjects relating to sex, gender, gender discrimination, trans people and issues, intersex people and issues, queerness, and occasionally sexual and romantic orientation. any other subject matter will be addressed as it relates to any of these topics (for example, how black trans people face intersectionality of transphobia and racism, or how neurodivergent people often do not have their gender taken seriously)
i am not going to critically engage with bad-faith arguments. if i am going to engage with them at all, then it is going to be public mockery or using a bad-faith argument as an opportunity to learn or speak about something related to it. if you step into my ask box, especially if you're going anon, you agree to whatever i may say in response to it being posted publicly even if that means making fun of you. if you do not want this, do not send an ask
i will NOT tolerate, under any circumstance, any kind of prejudice, e.g. transphobia (including, but not limited to, transmisogyny AND transandrophobia), interphobia/intersexism, or any other kind of prejudice, even if it is not relating to gender. yes, this includes androphobia, which very often comes with gender essentialism. i am NOT an anti-feminist MRA, so fuck off if you want to strawman me and say that i am
i will primarily be talking about my own firsthand experiences, which may include more mentions of transandrophobia than transmisogyny. i will do my best, though, to emphasize the equality of these struggles, because neither are worse than the other and they are both severe problems that must be addressed with serious attention, especially if either are coming from inside the trans community itself
under the cut are a few of my general beliefs. if you don't want to read through the rest, that's totally fine and i understand, this post is long enough already lmao
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first of all, any of these beliefs may shift or alter over time. if that is the case i will regularly check this and make sure no edits need to be made, and if something conflicts with a post i made, please refer to the original post rather than this list
and also, all of these are opinions that i hold. if you disagree with anything, we can talk about it
with that in mind, let's begin!
to me, gender has no categories or boxes to fit everyone into. rather, gender is sort of an internal perspective of the self, which may or may not change over time, and is different for everyone, much like an internal fingerprint. you cannot tell someone's exact gender by their self-expression, nor simple descriptive words like "non-binary" or "man" or "woman". there is nothing prescriptive or inherent about any of these labels, and these labels are not and can never be "categories", and thus by nature are difficult to define. the closest i've gotten is describing a sort of "core" of a person which these words can describe, but everything connected to it can be of any nature so long as it supports and upholds the core. but this idea is very underdeveloped as of right now and i'll need to think about it
the presence or lack of gender dysphoria in someone has no bearing on someone's transness. that is to say, you don't need it to be trans, and you don't need to be trans if you have it. gender euphoria is an experience most powerfully felt by trans people, so if i were to explain what makes someone trans in very simple terms, it would be "experiencing intense gender euphoria with certain words, phrases, aspects of presentation, activities, or other stimuli". i believe there's more to it than this-- the idea that cis people may experience some form of gender euphoria is on my list of ideas to flesh out-- but generally speaking this is the belief i hold. this also means transmeds get fucked lmfao
bioessentialism (assigning inherent attributes based on sex) and gender essentialism (assigning inherent attributes based on gender) are always bad no matter for what purpose(s) they're used. no exceptions. this means i will not be seeing eye-to-eye with most radfems-- yes, even trans-inclusive ones-- unless they can actively challenge the notion of anyone having any inherent traits because of their manhood, womanhood, femininity, masculinity, or anything of the sort
sex, much like gender, is not binary. there are multiple different characteristics that don't just come down to chromosomes, and to define sex as purely chromosomal is beyond stupid because human bodies are more complex than that
gender as most see it in western society today is a social construct, however to me, gender is tied to one's sense of self that is built upon social interactions and culturally-constructed ideas, concepts, etc. that is to say, gender is who "you" are, constructed by how you interact with society
gender as most see it in western society today should be deconstructed and replaced with the idea that, basically, you can be whoever you want forever. anyone should be able to incorporate anything into their gender that makes sense for them, yes, even "weird" or unconventional things, including any and all pronouns that you use
everyone regardless of gender is hurt by discrimination based on sex, gender, etc. which means yes, men are hurt by misogyny too and the only way to eliminate systemic and social misogyny is to eliminate all systemic and social sex and gender discrimination
cant believe i have to say this. transandrophobia is a real thing. androphobia is a real thing. men can suffer in ways different than women but those ways are still very real. discrimination, prejudice, even bigotry are not exclusive to one, "most oppressed" group. it is not the fucking oppression olympics, get your head all the way out of your ass. baeddelists can fuck right off
all ideas that borrow from gender critical theory, gender essentialism, bioessentialism, or any other ideology that is exclusionary towards one or more types of trans people should NOT be portrayed as "progressive", nor should they be adopted by anyone who actually gives a damn about making a change for a better and more inclusive future. basically, do not sit at the TERF table if you don't wanna get called a TERF
people should be believed for the labels they define themselves with, because even if they're liars, what good does it bring to risk gatekeeping a real person with real experiences. this goes for sex, gender, sexual orientation, romantic orientation, so on and so forth. this also applies to everything else in my mind but for here i'll mainly be talking about it in relation to these things
some people's definitions of themselves might not make sense to you, and that's okay. there are some things that don't even make sense to me yet. but i choose to live and let live, and i think pretty much everyone would benefit from others doing the same. sometimes, what people say about themselves isn't really supposed to make sense to anyone but themselves. the human experience is a complicated mess in every other regard, so why is this any different
i'll probably end up adding more as i continue to think and process my own ideas. until then, that's basically everything i can think of right now
good-faith debates and challenges are welcome, although i might not respond to everything. i will try my best to keep on top of education and information, but i promise i will get some things wrong. in those cases, i wish to be better informed so that i don't perpetuate misinformation or poorly-supported ideas
and finally, in case you haven't seen my banner:
i believe that's everything! thanks for reading all this way, and i look forward to this experience
I also want to talk about the fact that a lot of transmedicalists especially those in the USA are heavily influenced by a meritocratic point of view but i dont have the time or energy to do that rn lol
was just minding my own damn business on tumblr and was jumpscared by a post claiming that the hostility trans men face from radfems is as a direct result of us being too loud and driven for power. i will not link or reblog or screenshot the post for OP's safety and comfort.
anyway, i hope all trans men (and trans people in general for that matter) have a safe, wonderful day, and please remember the hate and violence you face is not your fault. you are worthy of love, and you are worth speaking out on behalf of. we as the trans community need all the support we can get, from each other and our surrounding allies, and regardless of what anyone says, we are all worthy of a safe, comfortable, happy life, or at least one where we can speak and people will listen
you resisted the forcefemmification beams for too long
Nope. Completely incorrect and wrong.
This is a decision that I made for myself. I made this choice because it's who I want to be. Not because someone else wanted me to for their own pleasure.
hey to all those people a few months ago in mine and Jenny's notifs saying "cis guys are so sensitive lol whats wrong with being called a trans girl" i want you to know you actively made it feel less safe for my friend to transition for, quite literally, years. there is a difference between speculating openly about the gender of a fictional character, and the gender of a living human being who has asked people to stop doing so.
you didnt "force open" the egg. you didnt help. you told her "this isnt your choice, nor is it important. what you are is mundane and obvious, and we can all see it. stop pretending." that isnt encouragement. thats impatient and reductive. that's childishness. you threw an ideological tantrum when she asked you to stop. you threw a bigger one when other trans girls who actually know her asked you to stop.
you arent her friend. it wasnt your place to speak with familiarity as if you were. you made it more difficult for a public figure to come out as trans, and she was asking you to stop the entire time. that is the irrevocable truth.
there is no universal "best way" to have your egg cracked. if you keep trying to crack eggs that you shouldn't, youre going to end up with a lot of dead birds who you denied the opportunity to fly, all because you wanted to be in some part responsible for how beautiful you thought it might become.
genuine question. how do you deal with... all of it? as a trans boy i've really been feeling the effects of endlessly catching up on the new reasons why trans men "aren't oppressed and should shut up and let themselves be erased forever". it's exhausting but i don't know how to stop, it's like i need to have a rebuttal for every argument ever. it's literally 3am as i write this, i have things to do in the morning yet here i am scrolling transphobia tags on tumblr and wanting to scream to the high heavens as to why people can't advocate for trans women without obligatorily throwing trans men under the bus.
sorry for the ramble i'm just kinda. bleh.
i'm going to be straight with you-- I distanced myself from transandrophobia conversations for a reason.
it's an important fight, but it's one that took a severe toll on my mental health. banging my fists against brick walls did nothing but hurt my fists. one day, I just decided to unfollow every transandrophobia-related tag and blog that was primarily about transandrophobia. not because I disagree with them anymore, but just because I couldn't take constantly being subjected to people, trans or otherwise, saying that because of my transness I had no place in civil discussion and that everything I said and stood for was harming the world.
thankfully, a lot of people I spoke to *privately* and respectfully, NOT for any kind of likes or attention or "gotcha!" moments on tumblr, seemed to understand perfectly where I was coming from and ended up agreeing and using the term appropriately. suddenly, I began having productive conversations not just about transmisogyny, but about every intersectional type of transphobia (and intersexism/interphobia/exorsexism, because I find MANY of these transphobia types' talking points go hand in hand with hating intersex and other sexually diverse people).
I still get mad about it. I still pace around my room sometimes when a rogue post finds its way onto my dashboard. but i have trained myself to block those bigots on sight, and to scroll past even posts I agree with. (it also helps just having a special channel on my friend group discord server where i can privately send screenshots of tumblr posts and go "lol, look at this dweeb, i will debunk every argument in their post with minimal effort" to get that catharsis without drawing active attention to either myself OR the other person)
my goal and message has always been trans unity, always will be. and sometimes, in order to keep up that goal, i have to step away from discussions that are more heated. it was a difficult decision to make, and a difficult decision to follow through with, but an important one nonetheless.
- to give new detransitioners hope for a future after transition that includes joy and satisfaction
- to promote solidarity between the trans and detrans communities in order to share resources and so that detransitioning is no longer treated as “betraying” our trans siblings
RESOURCES NEEDED / HOW TO HELP
we currently need information on the following
- which insurances cover detrans healthcare (ex. top surgery for detrans men) and where they are
- which name (and legal gender) change resources also serve detrans people
- discounts for laser hair removal
- detrans friendly support groups around transitioning to another gender
- hotlines/helplines
- posts/articles that give tips for passing as your gender
There needs to be a real discussion about how y'all cannot help but dequeer intersex people. It's not intersex kids being forced into/pressured into SRS, its lucky cis kids. it's not a trans woman, its someone who's birth sex is "too close" to being female so they are "basically cis". Some of you queers are allergic to acknowledging intersex people are their own group, with their own diverse experiences, and their own struggles that deserve conversations that do not centre you.
Overemphasizing someone as cis (even if they tell you otherwise) as a way to undermine their voice as an intersex person is erasure. Barring us from queerness is erasure of our struggles. How can you call yourself someone who is a supoorter of the LGBT when you only care about yourself? Your voice matters as much as that of a white feminist's.
a few years ago i was basically forced out of a local trans community discord this way. got an anonymous email (lol) from one of the members in it telling me to leave, because my “fake cis woman problems” were annoying the “real trans people with real problems and dysphoria.”
let alone the fact that i am also a trans person and had those same issues as them, i’m just also intersex and apparently that was too much for them
I need perisex people to understand that the 'corrective' surgeries done on intersex children are nothing like bottom surgeries for trans people. Not just because of the lack of consent, but also because it is literally not the same surgery.
Bottom surgeries for trans people are done with the intent to maintain function and sensation in line with what the individual wants, they are functional just as much as they are cosmetic.
IGM on the other hand is purely cosmetic. It is done for the comfort of the parents due to the violent biases against intersex people sterily written into medical protocols. Visibly intersex genitalia is seen as already being faulty and disgusting; therefore anything done to change it would be an improvement, regardless of the side effects.
I'm 20 years old and I'm new to official queer activism. I'm young. I'm uneducated about the medical field, something which deeply fascinates me. I have a deep respect for doctors and what they do. But I know this is wrong. I know this is wrong. I know this is wrong. I wish the world would listen.
In cases of ambiguous genitalia, these surgeries are required to issue a legally recognized birth certificate. Everyone must be sorted into M or F.
The thought of just.. not assigning a sex to a child & thus violating the sex binary, is more horrific to perisex cis people than the thought of literally mutilating that child.
This is what the core of medical intersexism is. An unwillingness to question the social construct of binary sex categorization.
yeah, so… listen, you’ve just made everyone in the group really uncomfortable because like, you know… you have hands. and some of us here have been hurt by people with hands, so… that makes you, like, a violent offender in the making, you know? because you have hands. and the other day stephanie said that you shook somebody’s hand and that’s like, basically a violent threat to us so. you need to leave actually
Being trans doesn't automatically mean a person supports intersex people.
Make no mistake, this is a statement in support of literal actual physical violence against intersex people. Coerced & forced surgery IS violence. And it's purpose is to erase us.
I wish to harm the person who made this post necessary. I wish to harm them a lot. there are more than two genders and intersex isn't even a gender thing it's a biological thing (that is honestly pretty cool) who tf thinks it's a gender?
to make this obvious I'm trying to be on the side of reason and support intersex people here but m wording might be so shit it looks like the opposite.
Oh one more fun fact, about 1.7% of the population is intersex
Y'know, such a small percentage that it only makes up the entire population of Russia
Ah yes, like Russians are a rare ??? anomaly, but people don't understand the statistics and just assume based purely on perception bias, and then pretend like significant outliers can just be dismissed
Less than 1% are trans
Oh and final cherry on top, although it's not confirmed, this person might be shitting on themselves, there's evidence to suggest that trans people are essentially intersex themselves, just localized to the brain rather than more obviousl external organs
And of course, if anyone needs to be told it for some reason that "surgery when their young" yeah it's not voluntary the majority of the time, and young can mean like actually as an infant, like first week of existence
Yeah no. Trans ≠ intersex, brain sex is NOT a thing and is just bioessentialist pseudoscience and transmedicalism. Trans people are NOT intersex just because they're trans. No, not even ones that medically transition.
I wish people would actually learn what transmedicalism is and why it's bad. Transmedicalism is not just "nonbinary people aren't real" or "trans people are all intersex" or "you need gender dysphoria to be trans". These are transmedicalist talking points but not Transmedicalism. Which is to summarize: the stance that being transgender is primarily a medical issue, and trans people require medical treatment to integrate society.
It will never not be funny (infuriating) when people are intersexist on my posts calling out intracommunity intersexism. Transmedicalism is always intersexist because it argues for trans existence by reifying intersex medicalization and suffering to be used as a rhetorical tool. And then it proceeds to talk over our community LOUDLY whenever intersex people have a problem with this. It's infuriatingly exploitative of us and I'm so fucking sick of it. I legitimately hate transmedicalists so much.
due to some massive impacts recent queer discourse has on my mental health, as well as me now living in a country run by a fascist making me not really want to focus all my energy on how a very vocal and toxic minority of the queer community hates me for speaking about my own struggles, i will be stepping back from discussions of transandrophobia/transmisandry/transandromisia/anti-transmasculinity for the foreseeable future.
transandrophobia is still very real and very alive, inside the trans community and (especially) outside of it. me stepping away does not mean i do not still believe it exists and is a serious problem.
i just feel like it's significantly going to improve my mental health if i'm not spending so much energy focusing on people whose minds i cannot change.
I don't know if I will return to these discussions, nor do i know what kind of posts will be made on this blog from here on out (probably trans unity, gender theory, intersexism, and my own autistic trans experiences).
love you guys, stay safe in this discussion, and promote solidarity in these trying times for trans people
oh yeah, i'll also be unfollowing a few people sporadically if i find my impulse to get back into this discussion returns frequently upon seeing their posts. again, nothing against them or their message! i just want to distance myself from the thing that weighs on me most for a while.
due to some massive impacts recent queer discourse has on my mental health, as well as me now living in a country run by a fascist making me not really want to focus all my energy on how a very vocal and toxic minority of the queer community hates me for speaking about my own struggles, i will be stepping back from discussions of transandrophobia/transmisandry/transandromisia/anti-transmasculinity for the foreseeable future.
transandrophobia is still very real and very alive, inside the trans community and (especially) outside of it. me stepping away does not mean i do not still believe it exists and is a serious problem.
i just feel like it's significantly going to improve my mental health if i'm not spending so much energy focusing on people whose minds i cannot change.
I don't know if I will return to these discussions, nor do i know what kind of posts will be made on this blog from here on out (probably trans unity, gender theory, intersexism, and my own autistic trans experiences).
love you guys, stay safe in this discussion, and promote solidarity in these trying times for trans people
something that really needs to be discussed more under transandrophobia is this very insidious emotional sexual abuse that cis mothers inflict on their trans(masc) sons/children. this gross almost incestuous enmeshment and entitlement that they have to our fucking bodies and how anything we do with our bodies is an attack on them and their body somehow
its such a vile and disgusting form of abuse and its genuinely hard for me to talk about because its something that i went through myself, on top of other abuse
robin's gender studies blog @cl0ckworkqueerness - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
