tidings and mewsings of a cat-tboy (a catty boy, if you will) ⢠Vulvar Hypospadias advocate ⢠Exploring intersections of disability justice, intersex, and trans identities, some mewlings of being a system ⢠neutroix hermafagdyke ⢠one/none e/ey hy/hym kit/fae
Call me Whiskers or whatever idrc. This blog focuses on raising awareness, sharing personal experiences, and connecting with others in the intersex and ATM theory community. I love doing in depth research into topics, esp writing intersex educational essays. I am always learning. I tend to be very verbose as I'm hyperlexic, but I'm also dyslexic and dyscalculic so it's a struggle. While I am 21+, my account is notâoccasional sex ed + kink discussion posts are tagged, and the latter are limited to interaction from bodily adults.
If you like what I do, or appreciate if I've helped you, you can always tip (link) me
I have read over 50 studies regarding anteriorly deflected urinary streams and vulvar/vestibulovaginal hypospadias. If you or someone you know has any questions, lmk (:
Most everything goes onto queue, tho sometimes some things skip the wait. As I have several communication disorders, it will usually take me several business days (weeks) to respond to posts because I can only manage my phone in short bursts, work full time, and am bedbound when I get home.
I use oneself, none, e/ey, hy/hym and kit/fae pronouns
Schrodigender's catoffboy. Call me a catboy or don't call me a boy at all. [PT: Call me a catboy or don't call me a boy at all, in bold /end PT]. I use it as an omninoun (link). I may occasionally use masc language for myself but I do not identify as a man. [PT: I do not identify as a man, in bold /end PT]. I'm not a man or a woman. Not your bro, not your sis. I am a SW and have done FSSW
I prefer not to be gendered or sexed by others at all, but I permit it sporadically from mutuals. I do not perform gender on the daily. Linaricgender and IntersexErrgender. Antanaver, obscurique, maintric, aliusmasc and ahuman. Neutroix tfemneumasc. TNC and ANC hermaphrodyke, hard femme, transfem guything. (s)t4t sapphillean tranny until I die. Transmisogynized
DNI/beware of cat:
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I write essays for fun.
Death, violent, rape threats / jokes, and suibait will not be tolerated. Neither will any form of bigotryâthis means racism, ableism, sanism, classism, fatphobia, and queerphobia (including homophobia, inter+exorsexism, + forms of transphobia [transmisogyny, anti-transmasculinity, transmed / exclusionist beliefs, and transX/transID claims like âtransitioning to intersex / Black / harmful / etcâ]). I'm critical of TransID rhetoric and support alternative terminology. Individuals who use the belligerent language of bigotsâ"misandrodork," "theyfab," or "transandrobro"âwill be blocked on sight. This is not a space welcoming to rad/LSD/basedqueer ideals or forms of fe/male separatism or superiorityânamely MGTOW, masculinists, radfem, febfem, and perisex self-identified bĂŚddels. Following or heavily reblogging from Plaidos (a known transphobe) or Strawberry-Crocodile (a known intersexist) forfeits the presumption of good faith due to the consistent lack of it on their accounts. Support for the Israeli government and its actions conflicts with the Land Back principles and other anti colonial values held in this space
Well what about [XYZ]?
[PT: Well what about [XYZ]? In larger, bold font. /End PT]
Individuals with BIID where their dysphoria is centered around the physical body rather than "not being disabled" are perfectly fine and welcomed here. I do not mind those with alters who understand that their body does not hold the responsibilities of enduring oppressions their marginalized alter would face (and thus will not be fully capable of understanding oppression regarding that minority), who do not describe their discomfort as being "transrace", and uplift voices of the minorities rather than speaking over ("I have a black/trans/IS/disabled alter so I get to decide what's bigoted" đ)
More about me:
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I was UAAB and grew up as a trans girl, but now I'm growing into something else. I'm CTN and sociopolitically TMA, but don't use it as binaries (especially ones based on birth assignment "privilege") do not reflect my intersex experience, nor is oppression based solely on internal identity, but rather influenced by your material conditions and how you are perceived. I was raised a feminist and became a transfeminist before I ever came out. I believe in Transformative Justice and Community Accountability. Antigonist
I've been transitioning for over a decade as someone who is ambigonadal with a partial androgen resistance. I was part of the transgender craze seducing your daughters before Abigail Shrier even started taking notes. I've been called a bĂŚddel since before Tumblr discovered it. I have survived and prevailed through a forced detransition. I've had more than a handful of people consider me a queer elder. I will remove you as a follower if I catch you being an ass in my notifs to someone I've responded to
I'm autistic, part of a small medically adaptive, disassociative, biconscious atrium collective, and am disabled on many levels. I use mobility aids daily and struggle to get anywhere without them due to my numerous musculoskeletal and soft tissue deformities, along with FND. I also have some disfigurements but don't consider myself Disfigured. I also have exfoliative keratolysis. Radinclu
I cannot tell you if you are intersex or not. I don't mind spam likes/reblogs, but be aware that coming back onto here to a bunch of notifs may startle me. I'm really weird abt compliments and tend to get overwhelmed. If we're mutuals and you unfollow, please soft block (blocking then immediately unblocking) me
Some posts:
Examining Sax's .018% claim (link)
No One Can Produce Both Sperm and Eggs? Think Again. (link)
Unpacking the Ethics of âTboy Strapâ (link)
Vulvar Hypospadias (link)
Problems with CAGABâs Epistemology (link)
Corrective Gender-Based Violence and Coercively Controlled Gender (link)
Some Tags:
#purrspectives for posts I've written or heavily added to. May occasionally contain others' posts if I completely agree w them and have no better way to convey
#transparency for criticism and #testimonials for praise
I fear many of us are forgetting that trans men belong to Men (the gender) but not Men (the sociopolitical class) and I think thats an important distinction
Sociopolitical classes are the result of what is called "social stratification", which divides people into categories of "social worth" based on factors like sex assignment, gender presentation and identity, wealth, skin colour, physical and intellectual ability, country or culture of origin, religion, etc.
Those in the highest sociopolitical standing would be cis het monogamous men who are white, physically and mentally non-disabled, neurotypical, wealthy, and not immigrants. There are other factors, but this is essentially the top of the food chain.
The hierarchy isn't a single vertical ladder, but more like a pyramid. The more of these factors differ from the societal ideal, the lower in the pyramid you are placed. And your place in this pyramid determines your access to things like education, jobs, social programs, and also determines how authority figures that govern the system categorize you and treat you. ie black men are perceived as more dangerous and violent than white men, despite there being little to no empirical evidence for this.
So sociopolitical class Men is reserved for cisgender men, and transgender men are seen as trying to "claim" power the system deems them unentitled to. Not only do trans men not get access to this class, they are often further punished for trying to claim masculinity, particularly because queer masculinity is not accepted as "true masculinity" by the system. The argument that trans men receive privelege for identifying as men ignores this fact. Trans men are only afforded the sociopolitical class of men when they are assumed to be cis (which requires access to a full regimen of transition tools like Testosterone and surgery), which ignores and erases their identity as trans.
It also for the most part to excludes men of colour, disabled men, cis men who are gender-nonconforming, and men who otherwise do not fit into the patriarchal standard of cisgender masculinity. Even a man who fits the patriarchal ideal but rejects toxic masculinity and male superiority can be ejected from the dominant social class for non-conformity.
Being a horny poster is not the same as being a sex worker I need you need to be serious right now. I am so tired of people acting like it's just a way to spend time and not a whole ass fucking profession that takes time, effort, and skill to learn. A person capable and eligible to service pipes but has only done so for their friends (which is well within their rights!) is not going to have more important and meaningful insight on what community shit, landscape or dynamics are like compared to someone who actually deals with offering it as a professional service. Your friend casually investing $10 in you doesn't make them a professional money advisor and/or investor who's insight should be prioritized over someone actively engaged in the field providing services as part of their professional workload and practice
also the thing about "we need to focus on the people most vulnerable, and transmascs may be vulnerable but not more than trans women!" is that it doesn't consider transmasc erasure as an active force.
its a take from the perspective that trans men are "vulnerable" is some vague abstract generalized way, not in a way which would behoove anyone to adjust their behavior or take action on their behalf. its the erasure of erasure; the assumption is that trans men probably have enough resources and support anyways, which could not be farther from the truth. some local communities may have more transmasc-focused resources, but many others do not. transmasculine people are left out of vital conversations, are excluded from vital resources, are ignored and forgotten when they are abused and killed.
it treats transmasc erasure as something which is passive in itself and which can be solved passively. which is erasure itself in action. i do not really give a fuck about "who has it worse," it is not about that. it is about the fact that if YOU do not make an ACTIVE EFFORT to advocate for transmascs, to make transmasc suffering and oppression visible and legible, it will not happen. it simply will not happen.
erasure is an active force. we all internalize transmasculine erasure and we can all easily contribute to it; we are expected to contribute to it. trans men&mascs cannot afford the model of "well we only need to raise awareness for the most vulnerable" because our vulnerability is defined by being ignored.
this is why unlearning anti transmasculinity has to start from (un)learning erasure. once you start to see it as an active force/tool of the patriarchy you realize it is the lynchpin that holds so much (especially intercommunity) anti-transmasculinity together. transmaculine absence is so normalized people experience our presence as an intrusion, and people genuinely do not understand why we would ever need to be more visible than we are. it is fucking everywhere.
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The (trans)gender of who coined CAGAB is irrelevant, it doesn't exempt the terms from critique, especially when the foundational theoretical framing is flawed.
According to Mahdialynn, the trans woman who came forward to dispute false claims about its origins in 2015 (link), the coining was focused on âtrying to find a way to talk about gendered experience,â continuing with how she was âtrying to make sense of trans pplâs relationships to birth assignment.â She explained that â[what began as] ânon-consensually assigned X at birth' became 'coercively assigned X at birth', probably just for the sake of an easier-to-pronounce acronym,â prioritising linguistic convenience over theoretical accuracy.
The issue lies not in authorship but in epistemology: the way CAGAB was conceptualized reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of the language it draws from, a language born out of a system in which coercion is not conditional or occasional, but inherent and structural. The concept of sex assignment at birth originates from intersex contexts, where it names a specific regime of biopolitical control often enshrined into law. This regime is defined first and foremost by violations of bodily autonomy, where consent is structurally impossible and harm is retroactively justified as medical necessity. Including, but not limited to, irreversible, non-consensual medical interventions, prescribed rape, and mutilation, rather than the medical neglect, gatekeeping, coercive control, and social conditioning trans people also face.
Framing coercion as a way to make sense of trans experiences isolates trans trauma as uniquely coercive, suggesting that non-coercive assignment exists. It overlooks how gender roles are forced onto everyone (especially queer individuals) and that perisex trans people face the enforcement of gender throughout their lives, whereas intersex individuals face both the enforcement of gender and the construction of the sexed body itself from birth. The phrase claims to address gender, yet conflates it by re-encoding sex categories as if they were gendered experiences. The terms originated from a conceptual misunderstanding of AGAB that equated multiple distinct axes of gendered experience, and their meanings have long since collapsed through perisex misuse. The conflation of coercive control, Socially Imposed Gender (SIG - link), rearing, and birth assignment into a single concept seen as indistinguishable and one and the same is driven by the majority perspective.
It is not just misuseâit reflects a broader pattern: a majority misapprehends a framework originally shaped around minority experiences, repurposes it for themselves, and erases its original connotations in the process. A member of the relative majority took an inherently coercive system, misunderstanding and unaware of its depth; treated it as something that needed changing, and reshaped it to fit her own experience because she didnât grasp what it meant in the first place. I canât help but be reminded of the similar phenomena regarding "racist Karen"âas if "Karen" didnât originally mean a racist white woman weaponizing her white privilege against racialized (particularly Black) people. The terms have been appropriated to such a degree that their original meaning has been obscuredâso much so that people now treat what was already inherent as if it were a distinct, additional feature. For these and further reasons, many intersex individuals consider the terms inherently intersexist. On a separate note, as a species, we are required to eat to sustain ourselves, but we understand being "forced to eat" to live is different from someone being forced to eat by being force-fed.
She didnât develop it from a place of reckoning with the medical systemâs coercive control over bodies; she borrowed the language of intersex trauma and reformatted it to describe her own, without grasping its original weight. Her goal didn't seem to be about illuminating systemic violence, but to make describing trans experiences linguistically convenient.
When used by perisex trans individuals, these terms function as misnomers, category errors, and forms of conceptual appropriation (borrowing a concept and applying it to another context in a way that changes and distorts its meaning). Under this framing, âcoercively assignedâ misrepresents a system in which coercion is not incidental, but both foundational and systematicâa rule, not an exceptionâby portraying coercive assignment as unique to trans individuals, rather than acknowledging how coercion disproportionately targets them. Perisex trans people are not coerced into "correcting" their sex characteristics to be assigned a sex systematically in the same way that intersex people are coercively subjected to nonconsensual sex characteristic manipulation. Medical intersexism is rarely used to impose sexual characteristics onto perisex individualsâcases such as botched circumcisions resulting in vaginoplasty are nearly unheard of outside of David Reimer cited as the sole example. There have been perisex trans individuals with developed uterovaginal structuresâparticularly those transmasculinizedâforced to take birth control in an attempt to feminize them, however, such events occur after infancy and target the enforcement of characteristics rather than the erasure of sexual characteristic nonconformity.
While the experiences are very real, more often than not the abuse described aligns with established patterns of coercive control. Using CAFAB/CAMAB to convey violence that occurs later in life and unrelated to nonconsensual sex characteristic manipulation obscures the specific language needed to describe distinct forms of violence intersex individuals face, such as forced, coercive, or "corrective" manipulation of their sex characteristics. If these terms are generalized, what remainsââsurgically assignedââleaves behind those who were subjected to forced exogenous hormone treatments to explain their trauma in explicit detail rather than having a colloquial shorthand. For some survivors, the shortest is: medicalized violence, medicalized rape, prescribed rape, being raped with medication, and legalized incest.
These conceptual failures and problems with CAGABâs epistemology underscore why more precise terminology is needed to describe experiences of enforced gender, which I refer to as a âcoercively controlled genderââa framework Iâll explain in detail in the following discussion (link). The Tumblr post can be accessed here (link).
"Trans men are harassed when they get mistaken for trans women. If they just explain that they don't identify as trans women and prove they are afab the harassment will stop" is fucking ridiculous on the surface but in case you actually believe that bullshit:
I was sexually harassed after I explained to my harasser over and over again that I'm a trans man and explaining in detail what it was. I told him I was born with a vagina but was actually a boy. So he grabbed my crotch to see if I was lying
He decided to just check for himself whether I'm afab
So no actually telling someone your a trans man does not protect you, it does the opposite.
Dump your puppygirl is making me realize that some of you will go lengths to condone abuse. The issue was never the disability or care needed, they were always willing to do that. It's the heavy manipulation and emotional abuse inflicted while using disability as a way to excuse their actions, that is the problem.
As a severely disabled person with severe mental health problems, has a caretaker partner, and is trans, using your disability or mental health to get out of your bad behavior is just pathetic. Those can make things occur yes. But YOU still did it. YOU still need to apologize and take accountability. The puppygirl only ever used that to manipulate her partners. This whole debate is ridiculous.
I have been on a journey to better myself, but you have to actually put the work in and listen to your loved ones. You can be mad about this person detailing a long history of that puppygirl abusing people, with several other people saying the same things about the abuse, but that just makes you a bad person. If it was a man would you say the same thing?
And if you relate to the puppygirl that much you have a lot of work to do on yourself, and you need to think about how your actions affect others.
Be better, try harder, remeber to apologize and take accountability.
Being disabled doesnt give you the right to abuse and manipulate people, full stop.
Something that always bothers me in mental health spaces is the fear of relating too much to each-other across the lines of different disorders. Too many times I've met people who are not dissociative systems, but have dissociative experiences (such as from BPD), and they trip over themselves saying "no no, I mean, I don't REALLY understand what you go through, my thing is totally different," and it makes me a little upset. Disorders are just clusters of symptoms packaged together in a certain way, that's why the names and criteria often change across DSM and ICD editions, and viewing them as entirely exclusive clubs where only they could possibly understand anything about each other isn't a particularly healthy way of seeing it. The lines between disorder labels are blurrier than you think. You are not being a bad person or overstepping for relating to symptoms of a disorder, or people with a disorder, without having their specific label. Very rarely (if ever, frankly) is there a symptom that can only occur in one disorder, or even one type of disorder. Psychosis can occur in countless circumstances. Dissociation and identity compartmentalization can occur in countless circumstances. It's better to focus more on your specific symptoms and building community with your fellow neurodivergent people, using the resources that help you regardless of if they were specifically made for your diagnosis, over worrying about whether or not you're "allowed" to relate to something or experience something similarly to someone else.
higher quality versions of these flags would be highly appreciated , as well as redesigns âá˘. .á˘â !! ( as i sort of dislike these myself to be honest )
I don't know if anyone has heard of the Trans Period Pride situation that happened a short while ago, but it has shown me why advocacy is important for all of us and how we are affected in different ways within the community.
Fo those who do not know, there was an event organizaed in Boston called Trans Period Pride which was made to give resources and information to those within the community who bleed. It was supposed to help give advice and care to transmasc folks, nonbinary folks and trans men while being inclusive and supportive of trans folks.
But Fox news and other conservatives caught wind of it and got extremely upset to the point the organizers having to cancel the initial event (they ended up rescheduling it). Why? Because they assumed it was for trans women, and got upset about trans women "claiming to bleed and have periods". Mind you, in no way did the organizers hint that this event was catered towards trans women, but because conservatives can't use their brains and their phones to function properly, they assumed it was an event for trans women.
On one hand, there's clear blatant transmisogyny and transphobia directed at trans women. When ever people see trans, the only thing they know or care much for are trans women and transfems, they direct all their hate at them which is the horrible impact of hypervisibility. People choose not to care for or understand trans folks, and only latch on to what they don't like.
On the other hand, there's anti-transmasculinity, transphobia and erasure directed at nonbinary folks and trans men. Because many of these people didn't even realize trans men existed in the first place, didn't care to know and went ahead and nearly caused the removal of an event that could benefit the lives of transmasculine people and trans men. Some of these people DID know we existed and still hated the fact that we "co-opted" their experience as cis women. Some mentioned us only as a tool to further attack trans women. And all this behaviour ended in them harassing the organizers. I'm glad they still decided to schedule the event, but there are instances like this where they don't put it back up. And tras men/transmascs/nonbinary folks who have limited support or information on things like this have little to nowhere to go that would accept them.
This is an example of what discrimination can look like for the trans folks within the community; trans women and transfems get attacked at the forefront which leads to harm, harassment public surveillance, and even death. Anyone else gets treated the same while being stripped from access to support and care, and ignored when struggling as a result by folks both in and out of the community. And at times we even have overlapping experiences, but erasure and dismissal is far too prevalent in transmasc's/ trans men's spaces and nonbinary ones too.
And I'm glad that there's been a growing conversation on the erasure of transmascs and trans men in advocacy, in the community, and in media. We need to center trans women in the advocacy of trans rights, we also need to center trans men and nonbinary folks as well because we are all being horribly impacted by this in different ways, under different stats.
This really is a time to come together and fight, and to remember each and everyone of us are important in this conversation.
Being a trans woman myself, I find it hard to understand trans women who are capable of saying things like "I hate men." And believing it. I spent the first 16 years of my life as a man, and have tended towards friendships and communities with men. There is no true dividing line between me and a man that allows me the cognitive dissonance to otherise them as non-people. That is not me misgendering myself, it is just a statement of reality. I'm butch. I don't pass. I am treated as a man in most of my interactions with strangers. In many ways I would consider myself to have male privilege.
The ways I see other trans women rationalise a material disconnect between us and cis men in our brains, mentalities, formative experiences, largely fall into two categories: literal magical thinking, that such a thing exists as a male and a female soul and that trans women are female souls born in AMAB bodies, or a discussion of upbringing and socialisation.
Now, 'Socialised male' is an ugly talking point I associate with TERFs trying to downplay the existence of transmisogyny. Of course most trans women do not experience male privilege simply because of certain aspects of their childhood and upbringing. However, I cannot help but acknowledge certain qualities I had as a teen and young adult I have had to contend with. I was absolutely a misogynist as a teen, and engaged in behaviour that today would be called incel-ish.
In spite of this I would say that most of my childhood was otherisation in a way I look back on in retrospect as degendering. My life was a contradiction, since my biology had me forcibly grouped in with boys, but my external characteristics had me continually bullied as effeminate. I was outcast by either group. I did not know what I was, as no one could tell me.
Now this is certainly a classic story that I'm sure most trans women relate to, but I don't believe it is one unique to us. One that we have a monopoly on. I knew disabled or autistic boys who went through everything I did but worse. Other boys who would grow up to find they were some form of queer. Non-white boys. Poor boys (Not that any of us were rich, but some were certainly poorer than others.) Simply any boy who broke the norm in some way. I will never hate men because men are not a monolith. There is no trait universally shared by men besides the arbitrarily applied social label of "Man", which I myself share in many aspects. I would certainly say there is a particular type of man I dislike, but it is one difficult to define beyond saying "Misogynistic and otherwise privileged."
ppl who say trans men are privileged for being able to detransition and "become a woman" and therefore aren't oppressed are intentionally displaying their argument deceptively. they never mention trans women can do the same! nor do they mention the mental anguish that follows detransition?
i doubt these people have ever been forced or scared into detransitioning if you're starting or in transition / going back in the closet if you're pre-everything. i have experienced the latter. it is fucking excruciating. it feels like there's a person, your true self, locked up deep inside, trying to claw their way out, trying everything to be the person you're perceived as.
Ruth from The Dragonriders of Pern is canonically intersex!
[Image description start. A desaturated version of the intersex pride flag, with a solid yellow background, and a purple ring in the center. In the center is Ruth from The Dragonriders of Pern, a white dragon whose scales reflect the gold of the intersex flag, posed as though he is climbing the ring, and looking back over his shoulder showing one faceted eye glowing cyan blue. Image description end.]
A moment of silence for the trans men who, due to their assigned gender at birth, have been legally banned from speaking in public in areas under Taliban rule.
A moment of silence for the trans men who, due to their assigned gender at birth and religious backgrounds, have been taught that they are forbidden from being anything but broodmares to a man they may or may not consent to marriage or sex with.
A moment of silence for the trans men who died in childbirth from a pregnancy they may or may not have consented to.
A moment of silence for the trans men who dropped out of high school after getting pregnant.
A moment of silence for the trans men who only knew their desire for masculinity, but were beaten to death for it and told they were going to hell.
A moment of silence for the trans men who had their clitorises mutilated by female genital mutilation.
A moment of silence for the trans men who died without ever once getting to wear pants or cut their hair the way they wanted.
A moment of silence for the trans men who committed suicide rather than be seen as a woman anymore.
A moment of silence for the trans men who never were allowed to learn how to read.
A moment of silence for the trans men with perfectly treatable conditions who were allowed to die to avoid violating "modesty" rules.
A moment of silence for the trans men subjected to honor killings.
A moment of silence for the trans men who were murdered by abusive partners.
A moment of silence for the trans men who were subject to "hymen checks."
Why do leftists try so hard to defend their bodyshaming of men? Why tf do you think âsmall penisâ jokes and shaming men for being short or fat or having a neck beard is okay, as long as the specific man youâre hurtling these insults towards is an asshole?
YOUâRE STILL BEING FATPHOBIC, INTERSEXIST, AND TRANSANDROPHOBIC, AND JUST GENERALLY BODY SHAMING ANYONE WITH THOSE TRAITS.
