[invisible-goats]

what if i started carrying around paper strips so instead of going on my phone i could make a little star?

[contiamirian]

I have a coworker who does this and leaves them around for people. Very fun addition to the work day.

[manicpixiedreamkiller]

how many sharks does a tornado need to be considered a sharknado

1

2

3-5

10 ????

more ??????

other ????????????

Voting ended onMar 27

[manicpixiedreamkiller]

this is the level of analysis we’re looking for here people

[hacvek]

reminder to worldbuilders: don't get caught up in things that aren't important to the story you're writing, like plot and characters! instead, try to focus on what readers actually care about: detailed plate tectonics

[olyia-stories]

@dragonpyre any chance you could elaborate on this

[dragonpyre]

I grew up learning about land formations. Seeing fictional maps that don’t follow the logic and science of them makes me upset

[serinos-kitt]

What are the most common sins you’ve seen relating to this? I wanna know

[dragonpyre]

Mordor.

Why is the mountain range square. How did the mountain range form. Why is there one singular volcano in the center. Why does it act like a composite volcano but have magma that acts like it’s from a shield. If it’s hotspot based volcanic activity why is there only one volcano.

And then the misty mountains!!!! Why isn’t there a rain shadow!! And why is there a FOREST where the rain shadow should be!!!!!!!!

[serinos-kitt]

So what is a rain shadow?

[lethalbutterfly]

Wind blows clouds in from the sea, but mountains are so tall the clouds can't get past 'em, so you get deserts on the windward side of mountain ranges because clouds can't get there to water the land, or do so only very rarely.

[roach-works]

this is because, as clouds are forced upwards by rising land, they cool and dump their rain. so the side of the mountain facing the ocean (or an inland sea, or a great lake) gets all the rain as the clouds are squeezed out, and the opposite side gets nothing.

my favorite thing is the american great lake snowbelts! so, the 'flow' of weather across north america, in very general terms, blows from the northwest on down south and east to the gulf of mexico.

so the wind is blowing from west to east, and in the winter it's a dryer wind than in the summer because it's colder. but after blowing across a great lake for a hundred miles, the wind is wet again. and that wet turns into snow. so for all of these lakes, the big cities are on the west side, not the east sides, because the east sides absolutely suck to live on.

the sole exception is buffalo, NY, which literally has to be there because, unfortunately, that's where all the important canal stuff between lake ontario and lake erie is happening.

also this always strikes me as cool, check out where cleveland is:

it's right at the edge of that snowbelt. and you see way more cities west of it than east, too.

[beatrice-otter]

#but again. mordor looks like that becaue sauron made it#and he's an ass

On a Watsonian level, sure.

On a Doylistic level, Mordor looks like that because plate tectonics was a fringe, ludicrous, laughable theory that nobody outside serious geology nerds had ever heard of until scientists proved seafloor spreading in the early 1960s. The first edition of the LotR trilogy was published in 54-55. We literally did not know that plate tectonics was real until almost a decade after the book was published, so obviously, it was not something Tolkien could have been considering as he made his maps.

I don't know enough meteorological history to know when white people figured out about rain shadows and added it to geology classes, or what would have been taught about volcanoes and such. But any education Tolkien got on the subject would have been in childhood/adolescence; his college education focused on the liberal arts, not the sciences, and his professional study was linguistics and the middle ages. So anything Medieval and earlier European authors wrote about he had a pretty good chance of knowing about. But not much exposure to modern science. So his science knowledge was probably limited to "what English schools taught at the turn of the 20th Century."

[whetstonefires]

I mean, it's true he didn't know about plate tectonics, but he did know what mountains look like, and that it's not normally That. And it wasn't his style to break that kind of norm without cause.

LotR has recurring themes of the reckless imposition of one's will on the natural world creating ugliness, an order you thought was inherently an improvement that in fact is inferior to what you have displaced. (Typified by reckless tree-felling; a reflection of the despoiling of the English countryside and the world by Progress.)

Mordor is a rectangle because Sauron is an asshole.

[beatrice-otter]

#the rain shadow thing otoh was undoubtedly total ignorance#but those mountains were made as the fortress of a demigod#too steeped in evil to understand beauty#it's *supposed* to look like something that Shouldn't Exist#like quite often this is something that happens in worldbuilding yes#things are arranged Wrong because a person doesn't grasp the underlying logic#but mordor is a bad example for the same reason it's an obvious one#it's So Very Wrong because it was designed to be wrong#to give you a bad feeling with how much it shouldn't look like that#if he just wanted it unapproachable on all sides it could've been in a caldera formation it didn't *need* corners#the corners were a choice#tolkien's job involved lots of looking at maps and things okay#meanwhile people whose lives revolved around the weather generally knew where the rain happened#long before it was formalized into 'rain shadow effect'#people not having The Science doesn't mean they don't have eyes and brains

[cannibalcharon]

Western Washington vs Eastern Washington is a good example of a rain shadows effects for fellow writers.

Western Washington:

Eastern Washington:

For fantasy writers, Washington is a really cool state to study because we have nearly every biome from alpine forests, desert, alpine desert, rainforest, riparian forests, wetlands, coastal, and so on. We have two main mountain ranges, the Olympics and the Cascades. We sit on three tectonic plates which give us said mountains (and earthquakes). Our ecology is really neat here.

[contiamirian]

To be fair a big part of why eastern Washington is like that is because a massive flood swept through at the end of one of the ice ages and took almost all of the soil with it. It’s not just the rain shadow.

[venndaai]

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

[venndaai]

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

[fluorescentbrains]

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

[muffinlance]

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Eye-opening research: Greenland sharks maintain vision for centuries through DNA repair mechanism

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

[h00pqueen]

Will someone please tell me how it eats a moose or a polar bear??? For the love of god before I have nightmares???

[muffinlance]

Sometimes animals go in water for swim

Sometimes animals not come out again

Hope this helps <3

[contiamirian]

Wikipedia cites this for the orca https://books.google.com/books?id=Rjksm-5-ap4C&pg=PA23.

And says this about the shark “Greenland sharks have also been found with remains of moose, horse, and reindeer (in one case an entire reindeer carcass) in their stomachs. Polar bear remains have also been recovered, though these are thought to be of bears that died from other causes.[13][45][40] The Greenland shark is known to be a scavenger and is attracted by the smell of rotting meat in the water. The sharks have frequently been observed lurking around fishing boats and herds of seals.[13]

Although such a large shark could easily consume a human swimmer, the frigid waters it typically inhabits make the likelihood of attacks on people very low. To date only one report exists of human predation by a Greenland shark. Around 1859 in Pond Inlet, Canada, a Greenland shark was caught reportedly containing a human leg in its stomach. This story, however, was never scientifically investigated and remains unverified.[13]”

Citations

Global warming may not be the only threat to the polar bear. Scientists are puzzling over the discovery of the jawbone of a young polar bear

Somniosus microcephalus (Greenland shark) | INFORMATION | Animal Diversity Web

FLMNH Ichthyology Department: Greenland Shark

Killer Whales of the World

An in-depth introduction to a popular species of marine mammal and the various habitats in which it can be found. Annotation. Killer Whales

[byjove]

Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*

My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

The spiritual successor to Miette

[manicgoblinnightmarewoman]

Might I also add

[shydestinybread]

May i add the piece from artist Verbal Vomit

[unyanizedcatboys]

Glad to see we’re all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children

[explorerrowan]

I am so incredibly glad we finally moved on from "i can has". Cats are clearly smart enough for advanced sentence structure and dumb enough to draw entirely incorrect conclusions about what they're talking about.

[dualclock]

My cat, banging the cabnet door over and over and over: bang bang bang

Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door.

My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang

Me: ksst!

My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she's been shot: Oh! Oh I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you!

Me: ok

My cat, after waiting about 3 minutes: bang bang bang

[notcaycepollard]

[callmebliss]

Can haz snackytreat

[ladyshinga]

(source)

[dogsrulepeopledrool]

Source

[cryoverkiltmilk]

#the ancient texts

... My reblog was only six years ago!

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[sleepiercreature]

People are talking about how reading Dungeon Meshi gives them an internal monologue Senshi for eating properly I think we all need to adopt an internal monologue Chilchuck at work. Like the boat is literally sinking and he's just watching it happen because he's on his lunch break.

[poundfooolish]

#remember chilchuk would tell you to always put ur own needs and rights first in the workplace 🧡 (@clowniconography)

[prinxperseverant]

This is the Union Chilchuck, reblog him to affirm your own worth as a worker and entitlement to regular breaks

[blujayonthewing]

#keep senshi in your heart to eat well #chilchuck in your heart to maintain boundaries #laios in your heart to stay passionate #marcille in your heart to speak your mind #and izutsumi to be kbity [X]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

me on the first Jurassic Park test ride: mm. note to self: very first exhibit, they said the dilophosaurus was poisonous, then immediately referenced its venom. thats a real oversight, i hope they fix it. well at least it probably can’t get worse than this

[lhoandbehold]

The full saga of Margie and the Nuns (so far). Realised I never compiled these in one place.! Also, bonus Margies!

[planeposting]

Stabilize our trajectory please

Pitch up

Pitch down

Left rudder

Right rudder

Left roll

Right roll

No1 engine thrust

No2 engine thrust

Flap angle

Altitude

Voting ended onMay 10

I just wanna see how we crash this plane

# of likes = # of passengers on board

# of reblogs = # of flight hours the pilots have

Good luck soldiers

[aq2003]

obi-wan 99 problems amv

[jv]

This may be the worst use of LLMs anyone has attempted, ever. Up there with recognizing mushrooms.

[ashenmind]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl... what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀

[cheaphalloweencostume]

happy birthday devils sacrament. i wish you were never born

[luntfontanne]

holy shit

[swordshapedleaves]

This is an objectively funny crime and the jury mostly agreed. Acquitted of all 7 felonies!

[contiamirian]

Prosecutors had initially charged Woods with seven felonies, each of which were nullified by the jury. Instead, she was found guilty of four misdemeanor counts of assault and battery, as well as two counts of reckless assault. The beekeeper maintains that she did nothing wrong, and has filed a notice of appeal, the NYT reported.

Woman Convicted for Attacking Police With Swarm of Furious Bees

A Massachusetts woman was sentenced to six months in jail after unleashing bees on officers to defend her friend's home.

[viceisvice]

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

obviously this is AI generated slop but I keep laughing at ophelia labeled “hamlet’s brother”

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

very interested in the 523 likes in the corner supporting this groundbreaking interpretation of ophelia

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

king blyssffsttt my good friend king blyssffsttt

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

[inthefallofasparrow]

HAMLET My brother? KING BLYSSFFSTTT No, the other Ophelia

[elodieunderglass]

Hamlet: What?

The Ghost: I am thy father's spirit,

Doom'd for a certain term to walk the night,

Not that other guy, Ophelia,

The spirit of King Blyssffstt.

Hamlet: upon my word -

This preponderance of spirits hath me full vex’d;

Which is Hamlet? Which Ophelia? Which living and which dead?

Who are we all but ghosts upon a waking stage,

Dreaming - dreamt; haunted, haunting; all unmoored -

Upon a theatre plain, of blighted vanity.

The Ghost: Mark me -

Hamlet: and now your name is Mark as well?!

[hungwy]

today someone asked me what my favorite even-toed ungulate is… god, who could decide?

[hungwy]

this was ignorant of me to post. of course its the muskox

[hungwy]

and here comes my favorite boy…

[weaselle]

okay. some of you must surely be getting tired of seeing me say this but i literally cannot help myself- THAT IS AN ICE AGE GOAT. THAT CAN GET TO BE 800lbs BIG.

we called them musk-ox because we thought they must be some kind of cow thing, but they are actually a goat thing; this is to a normal wild goat what a woolly mammoth is to a normal elephant, only these things survived.

and i absolutely cannot help myself because of the tizzy my brain goes into over the twin facts of

1: ice-age megafauna that is still alive! and

2: EIGHT HUNDRED POUND GOAT

you can see the goatishness a little more in their babies

i just, i am crazy over the fact that these guys are still alive on our planet

[escuerzoresucitado]

[findingfeather]

I absolutely fucking hate this. Gold star, no notes.

[sashasienna]