Okay so since this hasn't died yet, I feel like I have to add to it. The story re: my dept. lead also being on Tumblr and us outing each other with the sacred texts is like, one of the least weird/that sounds fake things that's ever happened to me.
Some of the greatest hits include:
-Was taken to the military funeral of a total stranger in the swamp lands of Louisiana by another total stranger when I thought I was going to a work meeting. (A funeral that ended with the words 'Sombitch y'all done shot MeeMaw!')
-Asked Zac Efron to take a photo with me in 2008 and then getting so flustered that I asked 'Do you want to use my camera or yours?' (he was very nice and said 'Why don't we use yours.')
-Was dressed exactly the same as every single person in my company (not in a company uniform, we were all dressed like our IT guy) when we were raided by the FBI.
-Got asked out at my mother's funeral.
-Signed an autograph as Kat Dennings to a VERY drunk man at the Nashville Airport just to get him to leave me alone.
-Attended my husband's 15th high school reunion alone and entirely by accident.
-Had a man come into my cafe and harass my employees and when I told him to leave he got up in my face and said 'I can gut you like a fucking fish.' And with my utter lack of will to live, I said, without blinking or moving, 'You can try.'
-Acted as maid of honor and gave a wedding toast for a couple I did not know because the bride was desperate to not have her awful sister have the microphone and ruin everything.
Since @grimeysociety asked, I shall expound upon the tale of being raided by the FBI.
Back in 2018, I started working for a whole body donation center. If you don't know what that is, it's when someone decides to donate their bodies to science, we're like 'Yeah, hi, we'll take it.'
This company was very much on the up-and-up. We had pristine medical facilities, quarterly state inspections, all the right certifications, the whole nine. HOWEVER that's not the case for every whole body donation center in the country.
(If you're considering donation, it's a wonderful gift, but PLEASE research the company you're planning to use.)
For instance, there was a place somewhere in the US Southwest that, it turns out, was basically running a Frankenstein factory. I'm not going to go into details, but there's a Reuters article about it and it's pretty much the most horrific thing you can think of.
They were using Home Depot power tools for tissue harvest and Rubbermaid containers for transport. That is all I will say. That, and about 10% of the FBI team that raided their site had to go on mental health leave immediately after because they had insane PTSD.
SO. Where do I come in?
Well, as I said, I was working at a different, entirely reputable WBD, but when there are only about 15 organizations in the country that provide the same service as a Frankenstein factory, naturally, someone in charge thinks it's probably a good idea to check in with the rest of them. Just in case.
Fast forward to October of 2018 and allow me to introduce Josh* into the narrative.
Josh was our IT guy. He was our on-site, tech guru, long-suffering, likely underpaid and overworked IT guy. He was the floor model IT guy. Tall, bearded, very quiet, very good at his job and had a tendency to wear the same thing to work pretty much all the time. Black jeans, black t-shirt, white tennis shoes, red flannel shirt and a black beanie.
Every day. Rain, shine, 90 degrees, 20 degrees, didn’t matter. This was Josh’s uniform.
So about a week before Halloween, we all get together to start talking about playing a little joke on Josh. We all decided we were going to dress up as Josh for Halloween. Everyone could assemble a little Josh costume, oh it’ll be so funny, we might even get him to laugh. Everyone was on board. EVERYONE from the receptionist to the CEO--everyone was doing this.
Halloween that year fell on a Wednesday. Unfortunately for us and our brilliant plan, Josh did not work on Wednesdays. So we decided it would actually be even funnier if we all dressed up on November 1st. So that Josh would come into work on a seemingly random Thursday and see everyone dressed up as him.
And it worked! Everyone did it! Josh actually laughed and sent out a little email telling us all how funny he thought it was, grading people’s Joshumes. A wonderful day.
Until about 1pm when the FBI arrived to raid our office.
They herded us into one of the lecture rooms and explained what they were doing there, made sure we didn't go back to our offices or make any phone calls, basically babysat us until the other members of their team could secure the files they needed and inspect the facilities.
We were all so freaked out that no one was thinking about what we all must have looked like. 75 employees. Sitting together in a room. All dressed exactly alike from our beanies down to our white sneakers.
I didn't realize how it looked either until one of the other FBI agents came in and straight up stopped in his tracks at the sight of all of us and under his breath went, "What in the actual Christ..."
Then they closed our office for 2 days while they investigated further, found no wrong-doing, and let us return to business as usual.
No one ever suggested we do a group costume again.
Imagine that you are an FBI investigator and you have heard all of the horror stories about Frankenstein's for-profit nightmare factory. Your co-workers have talked about it, there have been team meetings about being respectful of people's trauma and counseling services available, hell maybe you were there. And now you're getting ready to raid another facility which might be the same. You go to sleep the night before wondering if you're going to find a perfectly ordinary office or if you're going to have nightmares for for the rest of your life about what you find.
And then you walk into the facility and it's perfectly clean. Everything in order, paperwork filed, nothing amiss.
Except every single fucking person in the entire building is wearing the exact same outfit, from their beanies down to their shoes. Like you walked into a movie theater which you knew was either going to be playing The Human Centipede or Gray's Anatomy, and it's playing Gray's Anatomy but also every single seat is occupied by a mannequin with its head turned towards the entrance.
I wonder if they thought they'd accidentally walked into a cult, some new and special way for things to be fucked up.
Supporter sketch request reward art! Rita Moreno, accompanied by Animal, performing "Fever" on The Muppet Show! One of my favorite segments they ever did in the entire series!
May or may not have just spontaneously spent the last two or three hours or so typing out a chronological Star Wars watch order including listing every individual episode of each series because I'm a psychopath and a masochist
Between 68 BBY and 58 BBY Tales of the Jedi “Justice” Between 50 BBY and 48 BBY Tales of the Jedi “Choices” Probably around 52 BBY give
As of now it only includes the movies and shows but if I feel particularly masochistic I'm open to adding books comics and games in the future. If you're wondering why Young Jedi Adventures and Acolyte aren't here it's cause they're High Republic era and that's a whole sub-franchise and takes place hundreds of years before everything else and adding all of that to the same doc would just make it way too long and give me a headache.
Imagine if you had a neighbour who keeps performing songs from Phantom of the Opera in his apartment every night, by himself but accompanied by a parrot, which he has taught to sing Christine's part. Admittedly it's kind of obnoxious but you are far too baffled to even be properly annoyed. And also you don't want to confront someone with that kind of power and determination. So every once in a while you just hear this guy dramatically bellow
“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
It's not just to have a "do over" that doesn't involve the original cast, it's to cut them out of the royalties. Literally the entire point is to make sure all the money made by Harry Potter goes to transphobes or people willing to work with transphobes.
If you watch it, you are supporting bigotry, hate, and oppression. That's just objective reality. All for a story that you probably have already seen in movie and book form.
#the last point is especially true since the old cast receives royalties for anything with their likeness on it#meaning the original trio still gets money for every mug with their 14 year old faces on it#if they stop making those and replace them with the new cast which they will the old cast gets cut off completely#which is again exactly what rowling wants because she cannot stand those 'ungrateful brats' as she would likely put it#and as she has last say in anything that gets made in harry potter paraphernalia this might also explain the decrease in faces on products
There's people in the notes saying they're going to watch it anyway, and you know, I understand how you can start feeling so burned out and numb from the world that it may feel too hard to avoid things that will give you a little immediate relief in some way in order to avoid the long-term impact of funding these things.
But. If you can't bring yourself to avoid watching it, you better at least fucking pirate it.
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