Tumblr should never have given us polls. Everyday I have to see years-old polls cross my dash proudly proclaiming past-me's vote which I now disagree with. Let me change my vote!! I have rethought which Tetris piece is the sexiest.

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@craterlabs
Tumblr should never have given us polls. Everyday I have to see years-old polls cross my dash proudly proclaiming past-me's vote which I now disagree with. Let me change my vote!! I have rethought which Tetris piece is the sexiest.
honestly fandom has ruined me because now any time i'm in the desert and i see two vast and trunkless legs of stone or a half-sunk shattered visage i'm like "omg just like in Ozymandias" and its like come on girl not every half-sunk shattered visage is Ozymandias
And absolutely nothing was learned from this experience.
I’m not sure where, but I saw someone make a fantastic fanart of Hawaiian Shadow with a surfboard named Maria. After laughing tremendously for some time, I got enough volition to create…..this origin story for Hawaiian Shadow based on that.
Feel free to feel horrible for laughing at this as I did.
I thought the eagle with the wizard hat that flew up to me was going to tell me a mystic secret or make me party to a prophecy, but he just wanted to sell me insurance
In a conversation about Dropout, someone referred to a "transmisogynistic theater kid show". I was confused and asked which show they meant and they said "Dropout" and, uh
...I think they might not actually know what Dropout is
If a character in a book is presented as a boy the whole time but then in act 3 she is revealed to actually be a cis girl In Disguise no one thinks twice about it but the moment that same Girl In Disguise As A Boy is trans suddenly goodreads becomes can’treads
It's my birthday so go in City of Heroes and play my new adventure in Architect Entertainment
Arc ID: 73416
in honor of deltarune today, my hot take on berdly is that he is not an egg and that take feels like an overcorrection from the equally wrong take from when chapter 2 first dropped that hes transphobic. the idea that hes transphobic ignores him gendering kris correctly but the take hes an egg is based on nothing and often results in woobifying him. like i know queens "hes just annoying line" is funny but he does in fact has real flaws, in particular with how he treats noelle and susie. especially with how he assumes that both must like him. like hes not a super aggressive misogynist but theres some real sexism in his attitude towards the romantic feelings he imagines them having towards him. ignoring that to read him as an egg, or reading him as one because of that is questionable to say the least.
anyway berdly's actual relationship to trasness is that he is the cis person who sees themselves as the "good ally." berdley's ego being something formed out of insecurity doesnt change the fact that he feels the need to be superior to others and i think that extends to seeing himself as a good person. see the way he claims to go easy on kris's family's debt for overdue library books. when kris fist came out berdly definitely made a big show of gendering them correctly to annoying degree so that everyone knew he was not only a good ally but the best ally. nobody is a better ally than him. even kris themselves must be in awe of how good an ally berdly is. if someone else slipped up on kris's pronouns, berdly would interupt their apology to talk about how easy it is to get their pronouns, turning the whole thing into a much bigger deal than it needed to be. it probably took him years to calm down and be normal about it.
also berdly very explicitly has heteronormative and misogynistic attitudes even beyond his assumptions about noelle and susies (and now kris's) (imagined) interest in him that get ignores by people doing this. If he was injured in chapter 2, then in chapter 4 he is in the hospital and has flowers from noelle, which he assumes is a romantic gesture. when susie brings up that asgore brings rudy flowers, berdly discounts that as between "bros" and not counting. and the "i play mobile games" bit from chapter 2 is very obviously in reference to the real attitude in gamergate that a lot of "gamers" had that "real" gamers dont play mobile so all of the research that pointed to women playing games as much as men is fake because its mobile games and women cant be real gamers.
in light of recent discourse about how its bad to interpret all three main characters as transfem, it really grinds my gears that berdly was the popular fandom approved choice to read as an egg.
berdly is cis
not to get back on my "i swear i dont hate berdly" train BUT im seeing people celebrate him as this great ally because of how he responds to susie and noelle dating in chapter 5 and like certinaly he sees himself as this great ally for doing that. but he still makes it about himself.
taking the scene in its totality, depending on your choices in chapter 4 he will call noelle a pity date to her face, he goes down the line of noelle, susie and kris asking them out one by one because he cant fathom that none of them are into him, and the he STILL tries to insert himself into the date. He needs to be told no less than FOUR (4!!!!) times before he gets that he is in no way a part of whats going on, and settles for calling himself noelles wingman as if he has done anything to help noelle and susie get closer.
If you vote for him and susie for king and queen, he either thinks that noelle makes kris vote that way if you do it before he gets turned down because he cannot fathom on his own that noelle doesnt like him, or he makes this self aggrandizing speech about how he will support noelle and susie that he still manages to make about them wanting to kiss him.
He is as an "ally" exactly what i described in the second paragraph of this post. its about HIM. no, he is not a violent homophobe. but he could not even consider that noelle like susie despite how much time he spends with her and how fucking obvious her crush is. he is either too self absorbed, or, like how he dismisses any romantic potential of asgore giving rudy flowers because its between "bros," his thinking is too heteronormative to consider it. probably both.
berdly is straight.
also the fact that you cant vote for him specifically for queen should really put to bed the egg berdly shit, especially when you are prompted twice to affirm or deny ralsei's desire to be a girl in the same chapter.
Dude I hate Deltarune fans so goddamn much. He gets his ego checked and everyone acts like he’s poor widdle baby.
I can’t imagine looking at a group including two people who are mostly isolated within town with very few friends other than each other and the third who minimizes herself to do whatever other people need of her and think the guy inserting himself into that group is the one lacking a full social life. Do you pay any attention to the actual narrative of the game?
do you ever find something that is so funny and you want to share it with everyone but it also requires 18 layers of context spanning things like. 90s anime. aviation history. europop. canada. in order to even remotely understand why it is so funny
in the late 90s there was an anime called initial d which was all about street racing and drifting. naturally every single drift was played for great drama and excitement.
in 1999, an italian named giancarlo pasquini released a europop song under the alias dave rogers called Deja Vu. this song was picked up as the theme song for the above anime. it in turn became a meme, a shorthand for drifting and Cool Moves as a concept.
in 1983, air canada flight 143, a full sized 767, ran out of fuel halfway to edmonton, alberta. this is not something you want to have happen to a huge airplane. the flight chose to try and make an emergency landing at a nearby decomissioned airforce base (as they were falling fast and could not make it to a proper airport), where they ran into a second problem: they were falling out of the sky at 500 feet per mile, but reached gimli (the base in question) while still too high to safely land. normally a plane would just do a big loop-de-loop to lose altitude, but they had maybe three minutes of airtime left before they hit the ground: not enough time to make any kind of circle. the pilot, therefore, decided to execute a side slip to lose speed and altitude. this is Not a move you want to do with a massive 767, because airplanes are not built for that and if you screw it up that plane is hitting the ground at a high speed at a weird angle and breaking into a million pieces. nevertheless, the captain tried it... and succeeded. the plane landed perfectly, and there were no major injuries! (a couple of people did get minor injuries when evacuating the plane after.) he did it so well, in fact, that the plane was refueled, flown out of gimli a couple days later, and continued to fly for another 20 years with the nickname "Gimli Glider."
what is a side-slip, you ask?
it's drifting.
the guy goddamn drifted his 767.
in 2008, the tv show Mayday: Air Disaster featured the gimli glider with full reenactments as an episode on season five of their show.
and so, in conclusion, the thing i have been giggling to myself about all weekend:
this is somehow starting to make the rounds so because i am a pedant i am going to take this time to talk a little more in depth about air canada 143, the GIMLI GLIDER
so you may be wondering: how the hell does a 737 (capacity of roughly 100-120 people) run out of fuel midair? the METRIC SYSTEM, that's how!
up until the early eighties, airplanes would have three people in the cockpit: the pilot, first officer, and flight engineer. generally speaking, the pilot's job is to fly the airplane; the first officer's job is to provide support, monitor instruments, and assist (the pilot and FO will swap roles periodically), and the flight engineer's job was to watch over all the fuel gauges, electrical systems, hydraulics, etc., to make sure they were all working properly, as well as taking charge of things like "setting engine power."
however, in the early 1980s -- when this story takes place -- the flight engineer role began to be made obsolete as computers and more advanced systems became capable of doing most of that work. the boeing 737 of this story was one such plane: actually, air canada 143 was quite a new airplane at the time of the accident, and had no flight engineer.
also in the early 1980s? canada was making the switch from the imperial system to metric.
neither of these things is bad in and of themselves. but put together? one of the flight engineer's jobs was to monitor fuel; it hadn't yet been made clear whose job it was now. canada, at the time, was doing refuelling in a convoluted "the fuel is weighed in pounds but put into the plane as liters" system that required Math and Conversion.
let's talk about AIRPLANE FUEL. unlike a car, you don't take your airplane to the station and fill 'er up: fuel has weight, and airplanes care a LOT about weight. way more than you'd imagine. it's the pilot's job to therefore calculate a) how much fuel they need to get from A to B b) how much extra/emergency fuel they need for safety and c) if and when they need to refuel and by how much. is there bad weather in the area? where's the nearest backup airport? if i need Ten Fuels to get to alberta and there's storms in alberta, i need another Two Fuels to circle around and kill time before landing safely, plus another Five Fuels to get to calgary in case alberta is impossible. my airplane is fully loaded, which means it's heavier than usual, so needs another One Fuel for takeoff power. so altogether i need Eighteen Fuels. except i'm in canada in the 1980s so now i need to figure out what that is in liters, and this used to be the flight engineer's job, and idk man. maybe it's 5 liters? that sounds right?
...you see the issue. it isn't that anyone was slacking off, but no one was quite sure what the conversion was, and so instead of giving the soon-to-be Gimli Glider 18 Fuels, they took off in that fucker with nowhere near enough fuel. to make things worse, the plane had a broken fuel gauge, which was a whole other thing and series of comical misunderstandings, but basically it meant that not only was there No Fuel, but the fuel gauges looked something like this:
the very-soon-to-be crashed airplane's day started off normally. they did a little hour long flight from one city to another with no issues. because they knew the fuel gauges were being silly, while on the ground they did a "stick test", which i'm imagining involved a tree branch, basically checking that yep, there was fuel in the tanks, we're good! (in actuality, what it was doing was measuring the weight of the fuel. except, again, they had their maths all backwards, so due to this convoluted conversion process they went "our fuel weighs 5 kilograms, which equals 20 pounds, which equals 18 fuels, which equals 900 liters." just. silly math. i don't want to make these guys out to be idiots: they would obviously have never flown the plane if they had realized their mistake. but the other problem was of course that the process was already convoluted and required multiple conversions; imagine how much worse it would be if, like these pilots, it was a new system you weren't used to!)
so they boarded their passengers and set off from montreal with the intention of flying to edmonton. and that's when things all went terribly wrong.
pictured: the intended and my interpretation of the actual flight.
all this set up leads to the actual flight, which is almost boring in summary: while high up in the sky, the plane suddenly ran out of fuel. this is bad. we do not want this to happen. the pilots had no idea what was happening at first, but i mean: it was pretty obvious. there's no fuel. no engines. no power. you're 30,000 feet in the air in a 64 ton machine and gravity is going hey girllll heyyyy.
but the thing is, airplanes are really cool. like, this is what got me so interested in these plane crashes and accidents: airplanes are awesome. because first of all: just because you weigh as much as a building and are thousands and thousands of meters in the air? doesn't mean the airplane just falls. hell no! without power, an airplane will still stay in the air, losing altitude, sure, but gliding fairly safely and manageably. this doesn't mean you're safe, but: when air canada 143 lost all power, it still had time and options. it also had... the RAT.
the Ram Air Turbine, or the RAT, is an amazing fucking guy. if an airplane loses power? a hatch pops open, and a little propeller drops down automatically. he's wind powered, and he will provide just enough backup power to keep the most critical systems online, even without fuel or engines or god. we LOVE the rat. and the rat leapt into action here, providing the pilots with enough basic systems to keep going.
this doesn't mean that air canada is out of the woods. landing without power is not easy! the trick to landing an airplane is doing it at a nice shallow angle and low speed, which involves things like "doing nice steady turns to line up with a runway" (no time, we're falling steadily), "using engines to get our speed right" (what engines), "getting to the correct altitude and speed to touch down gently" (we have NO POWER we can't go "oopsie too low" and pull up and adjust). if a plane loses too much speed, it WILL fall out of the sky (a stall) because the aerodynamics stop working. if it's going too fast, you're not landing, you're diving cockpit first into the ground. without power, you can turn, but turns will reduce speed. you can't level off or go back up. you are Going In A Downward Direction. the trick is figuring out how fast and how far and aiming at a runway.
this is also where ATC comes in! we love air traffic controllers!! air canada called a mayday, and ATC leapt into action. their job becomes to Get Them What They Need. air canada wants to go anywhere in canada? atc will move everyone out of the way and get them any runway in the northern hemisphere. when this happened, air canada 143 was near winnipeg, which was their initial goal: this IS going to be a crash landing, and the nearer they can be to emergency services, the better. however, the first officer was doing Good Math, calculating their rate of decent vs distance flown, and soon realized that even though they could literally see winnipeg from the windows, they just weren't going to make it. they were falling too fast.
enter: GIMLI. the first officer had actually trained there during his air force days; it's a former base with two runways. it wasn't ideal, because ATC had no information on it and it lacked instruments and equipment (normally, for example, airports will have locator beams and so on to help an aircraft lock on to the runway at the Correct Safe Angle), but... better than a field or lake. one of the dangers of this type of no engine landing is actually being non-committal: waiting too long to make a decision, trying to maximize time in the air rather than land. this makes sense! it's probably pretty human instinct! prolong that crash as long as possible! but it's much, much better to simply Commit and Prepare and Go For It. and that's exactly what air canada now did.
they told ATC they're going to gimli and made the turn. the cabin crew was meanwhile preparing the passengers for a crash landing.
the crazy thing about plane crashes is, actually, that they are very survivable. don't get me wrong: they're bad. people die. but the number of worst case scenarios where dozens of people still, somehow, survive? shockingly high. of course, you don't want ANYONE to die. i would be terrified if it was me. but cabin crew had to know it would probably be... well, not okay. but that if they got everyone prepared and braced, people were going to make it out. people were going to survive this. possibly most of them. possibly all of them.
as the plane approached gimli, problem #87 came up: they were still too fucking fast. they're gliding down! they can't stop! normally, a plane would simply slow down with flaps, or maybe do a couple of big circles before reorienting themselves towards the runway to lose some speed and altitude, but they don't have time -- or altitude. and that's where the theme song KICKS IN
here are reasons you DO NOT DRIFT airplanes, by the way. it can fuck up your engines: engines work in part by taking IN air, so flying at a Drifting Angle means that's all wrong. the aerodynamics are wrong. you're losing speed VERY fast. you can get OUT of the drift, but now your engines are fucked. on the other hand, this plane effectively HAS no engines, but... there's a reason people don't drift planes, okay.
another plot twist: gimli air force base was no more. the runways were still there... but it had been turned into a drag strip, ironically enough. and it was family day! picture this. you're a nice canadian racing fan in 1983, at the strip with your family, cooking hotdogs and poutine on a grill. and a fucking 737 APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE in front of you. because that is exactly what happened. there were KIDS. on BIKES. with a PLANE HEADING RIGHT TOWARDS THEM. in the mayday episode, the kids tried to outrace the plane in a panic: in the pilot's telling, the kids simply froze in fear.
by the time the pilots realized the runway was occupied, it was way too late to turn back. they landed. in a twist of bad luck that turned into good: without power, they had to manually release their landing gear.... and the nose gear didn't lock. this turned out to be a weirdly good thing: without nose gear, the plane's nose hit the runway and acted as one hell of a brake in ITSELF, grinding on the asphalt as the plane barreled down at high speed. the pilot also intentionally steered the plane into the rail in the middle of the runway, trying to slow the plane even more. and... it worked! the plane came to a stop. everyone was fine. even the kids on bikes.
all this friction caused a small fire in the nose, and so the pilots called for an immediate evacuation to be safe. this caused a bit of an issue: because the nose was on the ground, the butt of the plane was higher than usual, and the back slides were basically just vertical drops. a couple people got mildly hurt using them, as you'd expect.
meanwhile, the drag strip folks were rushing over with fire extinguishers and the like, and the small fire was easily contained (note: do not fuck with burning airplanes. this one had no fuel so COULD be contained). by the time ATC got emergency services to gimli, everyone was safe, ankles were being iced, and presumably everyone was eating hot dogs.
the airplane itself had some minor damage (from when the nose acted as a brake), but was largely intact: it was patched up, refuelled, and took off from gimli a while later, where it flew for another 20 years before retiring of old age.
and that is the story of the Gimli Glider: that time a pilot drifted his plane so hard that he saved the lives of everyone on his plane.
all 69 of them 😎
I had read the story of the Gimli Glider before, and I had seen the video with "Deja Vu" playing, but I never understood where the song came from or why it was supposed to be funny before.
This is "The Most Tumblr Punchline" in action, only I didn't realize there was something to look up.
Now that I do?
Okay, that's funny.
this sewing pattern just touched me while i was in the middle of reading it
my 37 year old vampire girlfriend keeps telling me i simply don't understand the woes of immortality as if I didn't also own a VHS player or visit a blockbuster a few times as a kid
she keeps staring off into the distance saying those shit like "those as youthful as you know not what horrors lie in your past" even though we both know damn well she's talking about the 2008 financial crash
First they came for the manuals And I did not speak out Because I couldn't read
Then they came for the discs And I did not speak out Because I didn't have a disc drive
Then they came for…
See and read the full comic on https://penny-arcade.com !
Fun Fact!
BONUS:
I feel lied to. This is where the bugs bunny NO meme cokes from
Ah lads they fucking rotated him
Me, reading this whole post:
NOW it’s you
Oh yea? Well guess what bro
Best post I've seen all day
LEAVE ME FOKIN’ X-AXIS ALONE
"Cokes from"
What if Pomni ever sees all the fan art and stuff and is like "Wait, wait no, I would've been there for anyone who abstracted, Greznedge and I aren't together" but then realizes how deeply invested so many fans are in it. Would she just not tell us?
The children's show villain is a figure who sadly is not seen outside the children's show. There are few stock characters who as succinctly declare, from sheer stage presence, "the world is unloveable and it is painful to live here; that which delights mankind is like ash on my tongue" without being too fucking whiny about it.
maladaptive suicidal ideation: "i'm going to kill myself"
productive, growth mindset: "i'm going to steal all the instruments from Musictown!"