Crayon System

DID system, endo positive Account is 16+ because occasionally I will talk about a sex or a politics. There's not anything explicit on here, though.

[paranoidghosts]

happy halloween! i think venom would go to a miku concert and have the best time of his life

[lesbianshepard]

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

[lesbianshepard]

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

[key--lime--pie]

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

[notaflippinmermaid]

No, no no… you identify bone from rock or other substances by touching it to your tongue. If it sticks, it’s bone. The taste itself has nothing to do with it. And most archaeologists won’t lick human bones if they know they’re human.

…and I realize that doesn’t actually do much to prove archaeologists aren’t freaks.

[midnightmindcave]

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

[dinosauriaawesome]

I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them

[thesaltofcarthage]

I will never ever get tired of seeing bredlik poems. It is really one of the seminal art forms of the century. I am not being sarcastic. 

[wholesome-dragon-lady]

If I ever don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead and archaeologists are licking my bones.

[nookisms]

Person in my gas station talking to someone on the phone: ...We're in Ohio...

Me, knowing we're in Utah: ????

[nookisms]

[paddysnuffles]

Thank you for the map for context. It makes this 1,000 times funnier and intriguing.

[sapphling]

the more time you spend in active recovery from any given self destructive behavior or addiction the more you understand the common conception of the "relapse" as defined by a broken "streak" to be, like, so bad for one's own well-being that it would be funny if it weren't resulting in just a lot of misery and death

[the-peoples-puppy]

I told my girlfriend to think of quitting vaping as training her endurance by seeing how long she can run before she gets tired, then doing it again and hoping to go further next time. She said it really helped her.

[ghostlynotion]

tumblr simulator

mutual2 reblogged!!:

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stranger1:

blanket statement about doing x instead of y!!

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stranger2:

This. As someone who used to do y and now does x, this is so important.

paragraph about doing x

paragraph about why y is bad

─────────────────────────────────────────────

stranger3:

wow i didn’t know this!!

─────────────────────────────────────────────

gimmickblog1:

there are forty three sentences in this sentence

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gimmickblog2:

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stranger4:

Now i know this, Now you know this. We made the world a better place by sharing. This is what all conversations should be like.

─────────────────────────────────────────────

mutual-in-law1:

reblog to save a life!!!

─────────────────────────────────────────────

mutual-in-law2:

i’m doing my part!!

─────────────────────────────────────────────

mutual-in-law3:

if you don’t reblog this, dni. you think all puppies should be killed!!

(150k comments) (500k reblogs) (873k likes)

─────────────────────────────────────────────

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mutual7:

has anyone heard of this strange phenomenon called… copulation??

(0 comments) (2 reblogs) (9 likes)

─────────────────────────────────────────────

[yourenotgettingthisusername]

[castledock]

Image description: a screenshot that reads the following;

“Nobody:

Girls that bullied goth kids in high school:”

Attached images are of Taylor Swift, a white woman with sunglasses, blonde hair, a black tank top reading “this is my fight song”, and green shorts. She is wearing a leather bondage harness. It is backwards.

[betazoidpantsuit]

my favorite genre of humor is alt text being just completely factual and somehow reading the image for filth

[positivitygenic]

it's okay to want a space where you don't have to think about everything bad for a while. thinking about the things that make you happy is important, and it's okay to want to protect that space and make sure it's safe for people.

[weaseltotheface]

Everybody say "thank you south america" for the humble potato

[weaseltotheface]

Actually let's get specific with it

*checks wiki*

Everybody say thank you indigenous people of present-day southern Peru and extreme northwestern Bolivia from 7-10,000 years ago for the humble potato

[decemberwinter]

man I hate this fuckass country so much

[decemberwinter]

reblog if you hate your country

[lizardho]

Ok, so, bottom surgery recovery is going ~splendidly~ tbh, I’ve been off opioids basically all week, she’s healing well, she even looks pretty which at under the one-month mark is making me feel pretty optimistic. The only problems it’s giving me are that sometimes if I see something really gross it makes my body feel like it’s trying to suck itself inward from my vagina, like a black hole generated by the power of “ew ew ew,” and that healing is really tiring so I’m like…always sleepy. But tbh most of bottom surgery recovery has been peaceful, I’ve had a lot of time to do some self-reflection (which I hate, doing my own therapy as a patient suuuuuucks), BUT, I do have one funny story:

Right as I wake up there’s a nurse there who hustles over and says he’s glad he saw me wake up and tells me he’s giving me some pain meds and then he gives me IV Fentanyl and so I go from like “Ow ow ow ow awake awake awake” to “ooooooh fuck I’m floating on clouds made of rainbows” in like 6 seconds and so I was pretty out of it. The hospital had all the recently-post op patients all in one big-ass room, and they see patients for ALL sorts of surgeries, so I was next to an old guy who got his knee replaced on one side and some young 30-something dude with some kind of mechanism on his leg. So I asked him what happened since I was high as fuck and feeling kind as a result, and he said he broke his leg hiking off-trail when his leg went down a literal rabbit hole and snapped his shinbone. I say something like “damn dude that blowssssss” while giggling because I’m high as FUCK on actual fentanyl and he’s like “Yeah, for real, I’m feeling great right now though! What about you? What are you in here for?”

And I fully was not thinking like a person, I was thinking like a fentanyl-addled tgirl so I just go “Oh, haha, they cut my dick off!”

And he just kinda stops and is like “Hah-WAIT what? Why?” and I was trying to think of an acceptable answer to tell this cis guy because it’s dawning on me through my drug-induced haze that not everybody wants their penis gone and before I can think of a response two nurses just came up and…wheeled him away. Idk where to, and I don’t think he did either, because he kept looking back at me and frantically asking the nurses where they were taking him and I never gave him an adequate response so he probably thought he was gonna get that “Transgender for Everyone” shit before he was probably actually delivered to whoever his ride home was.

[slfcare]

reasons people might be looking at you in public (that aren’t negative)

they like what you’re wearing.

you look like someone they know.

they recognize a piece of clothing or accessory you’re wearing.

they think you’re beautiful or attractive.

they’re not actually looking at you; they’re completely zoned out.

they're bored and people-watching.

they recognize you from somewhere.

they’re hesitating to ask you something or give you a compliment.

they’ve seen you in that same place before.

you caught their eye.

you look like how they imagined a fictional character to look.

you’re actively reminding them of something completely unrelated and they’re thinking about it.

they’re admiring one of your visual qualities (smile, stance, hairstyle).

[alxor-of-hellsite]

also good to note that when someone walks into a room or moves suddenly or makes a noise it’s a normal reaction for people to look over! it doesn’t mean you did anything wrong or are being weird if everyone looks over at you, it’s just curious animal brain :]

[squeakitties]

[theinformationcollector]

TIL The Double Empathy Problem theory suggests social difficulties experienced by autistic people when interacting with non-autistic people are due to reciprocal differences, not an inherent deficiency, most autistic people are able to display good social reciprocity with most other autistic people

via reddit.com

[i-hate-ziggers]

[reve-nant-deactivated20251231]

[teaboot]

okay but the BEST part of the first study discussed (conducted by an autistic person!) Is that it shows that while easy, calm, mutual communication and social interaction is often more natural between two autistic people than it is between an autistic person and a non-autistic person, it is ALSO like this when an autistic person encounters a non-autistic person who imitates the autistic individual’s behaviours- neurotypical parents copying autistic children’s play, for example, apparently receive more positive engagement from their child- which is SERIOUSLY FUCKING IMPORTANT and VERY VERY GOOD because it is, once again, scientific evidence that bullshit like aversion therapy and enforced conformance and FUCKING “quiet hands” aren’t “”“”“solutions to the autism problem”“”“” and that “”“”“problems”“”“ with autism don’t stem from BEING autistic, but rather, from how NON AUSTISTIC PEOPLE TREAT AUTISTIC PEOPLE.

IE, once again, there is nothing bad or wrong about being autistic

[finnautica]

I thought Tumblr would appreciate Marseal.

[aratlesbian]

@cosmospiice

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[crayonsys]

hihihi i didnt even realize we were mutuals until i got a buncha notes from you and it said muts hi!!!!!!

I'm madoka btw hii lol

[the-unnamable-one]

what.

[grimeclown]

Me when a member of my Cougar Squad returns to my lair with more salacious dirt on one of my many enemies

[sunshine-tattoo]

homie is this an xmen porno

[grimeclown]

I see how you could get confused but that's actually me when a member of my Cougar Squad returns to my lair with more salacious dirt on one of my many enemies

[blazing-butterfly-inactive]

That ace moment when you see an xmen porno Cougar Squad gif and all you can think is "ooh those special effects are pretty cool, I wonder how they did that?"

[grimeclown]

I did it with my powers.

[blazing-butterfly-inactive]

You should use your powers to get a helmet that fits better

[grimeclown]

Wow ok you know what get da hell out of here