It's not gay™ if it's a three-way.

An blog.

[eroscestlavie]

everyone envies me for my Mateo Point

[homoquartz]

i’ve warmed up significantly towards the concept of small talk ever since i learned that its sole purpose is to make friendly noises.

as long as you smile and nod, people are satisfied. it’s just to show that you are nice and there with good intentions. we’re small in a big world and have to rely on other people to be decent to us. so we do our little human dance to each other to say, “i’m not here to hurt you. here’s something we have in common, like the weather or sports or itchy sweaters, so we both know we’re on the same team. we both agree on a basic fact, like that it is rainy or that being itchy is uncomfortable, and this proves we can get along. i’m being light-hearted and non-threatening right now.”

small talk isn’t to get to know a person. it’s just a greeting to affirm you’re buddies in the universe.

i am motivated by wanting the other person to know i am friendly, so i have gotten pretty decent at small talk when i used to hate it.

[piratedgender]

[moveslikekeithrichards]

working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”

[moveslikekeithrichards]

other thrilling destructions of my vocabulary:

the kid who replaced his hard G sounds with soft ones, leaving me incapable of thinking of glasses as anything other than jlasses

kid who would holler "DID" any time she finished her work no matter how many times we told her to just raise her hand

kid who began her scary stories with "once a time" and her friend who began his with "paw time"

middle schooler i had during student teaching who pronounced magritte as "mah-gritty"

the kid who said "i got boogies comin out my nose" while sobbing and the kid who said "theres his puddle of cry" while describing a drawing, both of whom i think of when im crying

kid who said that if he was 80 he would get big and turn grandpa

kid who, for no reason in particular, would just say "like a little feet" as a standalone phrase in relation to nothing

edit how could i forget. the kid who got sneezed on and angrily said "whyd you blessyou on me"

[hollowedskin]

My niece who asks people with dogs "are him big or him little?"

And every person without fail answers "uh.. him big"

[draconym]

Years later my vocabulary is still influenced by:

kid who called snakes "nakes"

kid who called calculators "cockulators"

my little cousin who referred to anything he didn't have an immediate answer to as "vewy mystewious"

"I don't yike heem"

[crowcaws]

Incredible events unfolding on reddit

[crowcaws]

[crowcaws]

I would die for Tessa. I would find her 200 toothbrushes.

[crowcaws]

So it looks like Tessa has been using these veggietales toothbrushes for ages, but has misplaced the stash.

[gluten-free-pussy]

I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldn’t see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like “uh…hi?” And she said “I made you, do you know that?” And I nodded and she was like “I hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please don’t break my heart”. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Mean™️????

[animution11]

[royalhans]

polar opposite of this post

[hrmsketches]

inspiration struck and would not let me go until i drew this

[gluten-free-pussy]

This is really beautiful!!!

[beanswithbones]

Girls don't want more big name studio super hero movies. Girls want indie movies on a 3mil budget where a YouTuber puts himself in a big box that shakes him around and gets a double eye infection from a record breaking amount of fake blood.

[eekahchu]

[molabuddy]

when u plug a phone into a computer the comupter always charges the phone even if she has less charge than the phone bc the computer thinks that due to her size she always needs to provide for those smaller than her even when it hurts her more than it helps others. btw

[chilewithcarnage]

[apologieslogan]

"you sent me down here to die, and you don't even know my name?" was probably one of my favorite line deliveries in the whole movie.

that and when he was begging the voice to keep talking to him because he was certain he was about to die. like good shit good fucking shit

[not-mary-sue]

Crack theory: There's nothing supernatural going on in Iron Lung. Simon is just experiencing the side effects of chugging almost pure ethanol like a fucking moron.

[dogpuppy]

[lakevida]

something has to be done about mormons this cannot continue

[wincoshopper666]

It’s literally just a religion like any other. Im sick of people acting like this about my culture

[lakevida]

you gotta get outta there

[ruinedchildhood]

[phantomrose17]

[silly-jellyghoty]

[lenacraft]

March

[abstractandedgyname]

[coelii]

reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

[kinkykinard]

[crippled-peeper]

having sex with your friends is so very normal please stop poisoning the youths minds with shame surrounding hooking up with your friends. especially if you’re gay

[crippled-peeper]

people are so fucking mad in the notes that adults have sex with each other and aren’t married sometimes. yall are carbon copies of your conservative parents and you’re so proud of it. ewwww

[crippled-peeper]

calling the sex I have with my friends “hookup culture” is insulting and incorrect. these are guys who take care of me and take me on dates and watch fun movies with me. being a disabled faggot too, they help me clean my place and take my trash out for me. they care for me and are on my emergency contact lists. trying to slap the label of “todays hookup culture!!!” on it is diminishing and devaluing those relationships

secondly, gay and bi men have been fucking all their friends and cruising and hooking up with total strangers since LLOOONGGGG before you were born and will continue doing so LLOOONGGG after you die. it’s never been a trend or a fad for us. It’s just a way of life for some of us and you aren’t going to change that by being disgusted by it

[crippled-peeper]

this tag has me in stitches

[hannahhasart]

So I read Lucky Day by Chuck Tingle

[drchucktingle]

this is a great LUCKY DAY summary thank you buckaroo

[omtai]

Im sorry I didn’t reply to your message for three weeks. I did not forget about it infact I thought about it regularly every day. It will happen again