Dark's Den

23, He/They, Artist & food enthusiast, sad attempt at a vet student, I'm very gay for men Also check out my cooking/food blog @cookuschus

[ohcaptains]

[enyter]

[marsipanart]

Trying to fix my values and threw a few Zukka in there 🫢

[cpericardium]

hey everyone "I" have something to show "you"

[cpericardium]

[cpericardium]

[transmechanicus]

*holds you in my mouth perfectly safe between my sharp teeth bc i love you*

[transmechanicus]

[glamygdala]

Safe in the jaws of mama

[crabanarchy]

I can tell my evil advisor has been feeling down lately so I've been pretending to take big sips from his cursed chalice and then roaming the palace grounds groaning and clutching my abdomen. Lowkey I know it's deceptive but I can tell it's really cheering him up. I heard him evilly cackle for the first time in weeks. WIBTA if I keep doing this

[darcosuchus]

...i like pretty boys...

[metaldinleyenpic0]

half of tumblr wants to fuck, the other half wants to die

[belvanabean]

i wanna fuck and then die

[nationalparkcryptid]

cicadas the lot of you

[storybookprincess]

so back when my little brother was in high school, my mom went as a chaperone for their senior year field trip to an amusement park. which, you know, brave move to volunteer to supervise a bunch of high school seniors let loose in a wonderland of rollercoasters and sugar

my brother and his friends in this field trip group were truly great kids. but they were not above run of the mill teenage boy shenanigans. it’s the end of senior year, you and all your buddies are at the amusement park, you’re naturally going to want to act like a complete moron

there was one kid in the group who was especially prone to goofing around. committed to the bit, some may say. my mom knew that if nonsense was going to break out, he’d likely be at the center of it

so she goes up to this kid at the very start of the trip and says “hey, i’m kinda worried about this chaperoning thing. this might be a lot to ask, but can you help me keep an eye on everyone? you wouldn’t have to do anything big, just be an extra set of eyes for me.”

friends, this kid proceeded to run their field trip group like the fucking us marines. everyone is at the meet up spots at the designated time. everyone waits in line for the rides like a bunch of boy scouts. the second the horseplay gets too out of hand, this kid is getting it back under control

it’s incredible how differently people act based on the expectations you set. instead of going to this kid and saying “hey, i know you’re trouble, so i’ve got my eye on you,” my mom went “hey, i know you have influence in your peer group, so i think you can help me.”

treat someone like a problem, they’ll act like a problem. but give people a chance to help, make them feel important, and they usually rise far above the occasion. it was a stroke of genius that i’m honestly still in awe of

[theweirdwideweb]

[sourcreammachine]

hi

1 quastion

hi i can’t fucking see

[sleeping-ranna]

reblog this if your icon could kill a man

[totally-cis-offical]

Not quite kill, per say, but it can decrease (or increase) the number of men in the world

[adjdhsue]

Yeah probably. To this day we do not know the full power of bubble cat.

[supervillain-offical]

Wait, it’s a cat? For the longest time I thought it was a squirrel! My reality has been shattered.

[oldersister-offical]

……i thought it was a chipmunk with a silly hat

[if-i-had-a-nickel-offical]

i mean he probably could but he wouldn’t.

[janet-offical]

Potentially, yes, but I am incapable of harming a human, meaning I have a button to kill me. However, there is a very effective code, meaning as you approach the button, I will begin to beg for my life.

[pipis-official]

{It canonically has like 589 different kinds of weapons.}

[darcosuchus]

uhhh. yeah. yup. yes. yep.

[darcosuchus]

dark

[casualcarpetshark]

[wayward-delver]

I shall hold the child.

[hikikomoricomplex]

i just don’t feel like we as a society ever fully processed deedee megadoodoo

[hikikomoricomplex]

a cop pulls somebody over for a traffic stop when she gets flattened by a poop truck cause the driver of the poop truck was jerkin his shit nasty style and they report the cop’s name was deedee megadoodoo are you fucking with me right now????

[mallowmaenad]

me clicking each link expecting to get rickrolled:

[thequantumranger]

A good pupper getting make-up done on the set of Resident Evil

Ripped from Resident Evil Deluxe Edition DVD

[darcosuchus]

boba eyes.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

There's a coffee shop near me that has two signs posted on the door.

One says "Students! Looking for a great part-time job that works around your school hours? Apply inside!"

The other one says "No under 18s allowed after 5:00pm without an adult."

And I'm just like, damn, I wonder if "you can be a servant but never a customer" is a well-known hallmark of systematic discrimination or anything. Like come on. How do you not see this

[firebuug]

Visit Original Link

[maplebunie]

i can't imagine why

[gremlingirlsmell]

Visit Original Link

[lumine-sm]

Every time you reblog this post another one goes. You wouldn’t, would you :(

[bitchautism]

can we kill Charlie kirk again that would just really cheer me up