I often see non-disabled people and people who live without chronic illnesses asking, and to be honest sometimes angrily demanding, why disabled and chronically ill people so often have tattoos and piercings, dye our hair, dress alternatively, decorate or mod our mobility aids
When you have a chronic illness or a disability that limits your control of or connection with your body, it can feel like you're alienated from or disassociated from the very flesh you live in. Making changes can make you feel more in control than you otherwise would.
Why be limited by other people's expectations of what normality is, or what your body "should" look like? Especially because
2. People already stare or make comments
I have had kids follow me down the street shouting abuse at me because I walk with a cane. I get stares and weird comments.
People don't have any manners when it comes to disabled people. They want to tell you about crystals or protein powders or meditation or a church that they're certain will cure you. And God, GOD, do they stare, and look, and peer, and examine
Adding mods and quirks makes that easier to bear.
When I'm walking around just with my cane, I don't know what weird comment a starer is going to make, but that it'll probably be weird.
When I'm dressed alternatively and with an anchor on my cheek, there's a chance it might be positive, or that I can redirect the negative attention.
A lot of the anger and frustration people express towards unnatural hair colours, piercings, tattoos, and even alt clothing styles seems to come from a frustration with what they perceive as a resistance to adhere to dress codes or uniform demands in schools and offices
The thing is, schools and offices already go out of their way to exclude us. Many places of education and business don't maintain accessiblity basics - ramps are too steep, lifts don't work if they're even there, allergens are everywhere, etc, and many places won't hire a person who looks disabled
They'll discriminate against people who use mobility aids or with visible differences because they don't like how we look, or because they don't want the expense that making a workplace accessible to us will incur
They don't want to deal with extra sick days or inconsistency from chronic illness
In short, many places that demand a dress code already actively exclude us; ergo, even those of us who are ABLE to work are forced to rely on disability aid, be self-employed, or work in alternative industries
Why would we make ourselves look office-ready when many offices don't want us anyway?
Many chronically ill and disabled people just have a very different tolerance for pain or discomfort to our abled, healthy counterparts. Not only do I tend to giggle when receiving a tattoo (artists have told me this is creepy), it actually gives me RELIEF from chronic pain
Many of us won't even baulk at the pain promised by piercings or tattoos or other body mods - needles and various devices inserted under the skin are already a matter of course, and as for the time and discomfort that it takes to maintain a good dye job, well, what else have we got but time?
5. Those mods might be helping
In the immediate aftermath of healing, the sting of the tattoo actually distracts me from my usual bone and muscle aches
Wearing tight waistcoats supports my lower back and helps my posture; corsets and bustiers can do the same thing.
Jewellery might serve as a stim toy or a distraction, but many decorative pieces may actually be bracing or supporting a weak joint or muscle
Heavy boots might help an uneven gait or balance issue, and keep us stable, and so on and so forth
To you, it might just look cool or different or sexy
But to us, it might be providing physical relief or aid from something that's been causing us pain or irritating us. Disabilities and chronic illnesses are extremely wide-ranging and can come with weirder side effects and difficulties than you might expect - relief can look equally unexpected
