"I know you like no one else ever will."
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@darklingduck
"I know you like no one else ever will."
"theyll hate you for this" "but theyll be alive" is THE juiciest thing to me
i will ensure you stay alive above all else. even if what i do to make it happen is horrendous. even if it violates all your wishes or moral principles. even if you can never look at me the same way again, even if you hate me for it. because at least if you hate me it means youre alive
"what if they fucked" WRONG. what if they ruined each other's lives irreparably. what if there was nothing left but a smoldering heap. what if everything that brought them together twisted and corroded and ripped them apart. and then they fucked.
For those musically inclined among us, here is Wylan's composition from A Darker Shore!
A Darker Shore is here, and it's so beautiful!
It comes with two envelopes. I only opened one and found the flag and a few other things inside! I'm curious what's in the other but it seemed more spoiler than anything so I'll wait.
Adding to this post because I remembered something else.
During their conversation over the meal, Alina asks Aleksander how old he is. He says "120, give or take", and while it's considerably less than his actual age, it makes Alina aware of their giant age difference.
Then Alina mentions him being a living amplifier and asks him if it worries him that Grisha might use his bones to make themselves more powerful. That would be a good opportunity to milk some sympathy out of Alina and say that it does indeed worry him and hint at related trauma. That's what a manipulator or groomer would do. Trauma-baiting, self-pity, that's where they thrive. What does our boy do? He says no and changes the topic. (Missed opportunity 1)
He asks what kinds of stories Alina heard about him. Alina mentions him "gathering Grisha from over the world" and he contradicts her, saying that he doesn't need to gather them - they come on their own, because the rest of the world is even worse for them. Sadly, it wasn't a lie.
Then Alina mentions that he's considered the strongest Darkling in generations. Another opportunity to play on Alina's feelings and accept this compliment in a favorable way and maybe flirt a little? What does Aleksander say? "I didn't ask for flattery". He didn't ask for flattery, guys. Imagine telling a girl you are allegedly trying to seduce "I didn't ask for flattery" when she says something complimentary about you. (Missed opportunity 2)
Then Alina tells him that one of the serfs said Darklings are born without souls; he doesn't react much, just says "I doubt that serf is the only one who thinks so". A good manipulator would have acted hurt and probably asked Alina if she also thinks so, forcing her to confront her perception, making her feel bad for him, and allowing a little vulnerability, but he doesn't. (Missed opportunity 3)
As you can see, the chances to manipulate Alina's feelings were coming right into his hands, and he managed to drop every single one of them. He seems like the kind of guy who has no idea how to deal with the emotions and shuts down every time the conversation gets a little too close to uncomfortable emotional stuff. For someone who is supposed to be a good manipulator, Aleksander can be used as an example of how NOT to manipulate someone. The pattern of his behavior is not manipulation—it's avoidance. He rejects any opportunity to become closer to someone he's allegedly "seducing" or "grooming".
Morning Doodle: “Why must all of your Saints be martyred?” Yuri blinked. “Because … because it shows a willingness to sacrifice.” “Do you think Lizabeta was willing to be pulled apart? How about Demyan when he was stoned to death? Or Ilya, chained and thrown into a river to drown?”(Leigh Bardugo’s King of Scars CH 11)
i re-read demon in the wood, my all times favourite grishaverse thing and i will now randomly spam. because little sasha is the death of me:
aleksander - shadow summoner - morozov being scared of the dark:
a literal kitten:
evil aleksander/eryk (hes trying so hard):
more evil deeds, protecting people from bullies...very bad, hate him
this entire page is just full of sasha being evil and manipulative and evil and...evil and...e...vil...
following the whole thing of him helping and following annika to get her an amplifyer, totally understanding why she would want one, despite also being wary because he is an amplifyer himself...
evily asking her THAT outragous question:
following him getting worried about a little child he barely knows, because she might be in danger, rushing towards the place she might be....
after some more drama he continues to care for the child that is NOT grisha...
than he saves everyone. because hes evil.
one of the best scenes in the whole grishaverse:
THIS:
literally the whole think where annika intents to kill him for his bones and his first reaction is this:
....
the most relatable fear...
after baghra burns down the village, killing everyone:
AND of course his most evil plan of all...: making a safe haven for his kind:
i am emotional about him, i feel so much about him, i adore annika and find it sad that no one ever talks about her, baghra is a fucking asshole...bye
Ah yes the super evil terrible horrible villainous villain of Grishaverse 😐👍 imagine your greatest crime being a threat to the system and the useless protagonist's filler B&W narrative
Grishaverse is such a bizarre case for me. I absolutely despise like 90% of the characters, yet this precious little bean...
Finally!
The first book is OVER!
Now I should just come back to cursed chapter 15 and Brainwash, Bullshit, Baghra.
Tomorrow later today, I really deserve some sleep…
2AM brain just hit me with an idea.
One of those TV show intros that introduces each of the main characters with a few scenes and a name, for a Morozov family drama show, like:
Ulla: Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss
Sasha: Mansplain, Manipulate, Malewife/Manwhore (either works)
Baghra: Brainwash, Bullshit, Baghra.
I can’t do Photoshop, but I can do Paint. :D
This is perfect, actually :-D
So during that last battle showdown in Siege and Storm when Alina takes control of the Darkling’s powers to create new nichevo’ya monsters in order to kill him, Alina not only got a little bit of his shadow powers in the bargain, but the Darkling also got a bit of her light powers. This was explicitly achieved through direct contact. As in, when they kissed other.
*nods and then savagely chugs down coke can, letting its dark golden liquid trickle sinuously down my chin, neck, torso before slamming it on the table with a razor bright smile that is not in the least bit strained* inTERestING
How dare you banish these comments to the tags. Let them roam free.
Now I’m thinking Alina was waiting for something to go wrong/was expecting the worse which is why she so easily believed Baghra. Or maybe she was looking for a way out, she didn’t want to be there. There was only a brief moment of her feeling confident in herself and feeling like she belonged but then she throws it all away because of vague explanations by Baghra.
Subconsciously she was wanting a way out or was waiting for something to go wrong.
Maybe unpopular opinion, but I think she never wanted to be Grisha in the first place.
She definitely never wanted to be one. She wanted her normal cottagecore life with Mal
She’s not made of protagonist material that’s for sure😁
With her powers and the geopolitical situation of the Grishaverse one would expect a Daenerys Targaryen or Jude Duarte type character to be the protagonist, not a sack of flour. Why Leigh why 🙄🙄
Because LB only cares about the love story between the boy and the girl. We aren’t suppose to care about anything else
Also unpopular opinion, but I have always thought Merzost is manipulated through intent, both conscious and subconscious desire.
Alina’s conscious intent was that she wanted to create her own army.
“I think I may be able to build my own army.”
“Soldiers of light?”
“That’s the idea.”
But it doesn’t change the fact that no human army can stand against the Darkling’s shadow soldiers.”
“Abomination against abomination.” If that was what it took.
I wanted to tell him I would bring all the power of Morozova’s amplifiers down on him, an army of light, born of merzost, perfect in its vengeance. I might be able to do it, too. If Mal gave up his life.
This is what she created hundreds of additional sun summoners, but did it have to take her own power to do so?
I suspect not. I suspect she was merely the template and that the prerequisite power and sacrifice was fullfilled by the amplifiers themselves.
If Ilya had intended to make his wife and his daughter immortal Grisha, what would be the point if he lost his own powers and lifespan in the process?
This leads me to subconscious intent:
If Alina never wished to be Grisha then the removal of her powers was not a sacrifice forced on her by the narrative, but the result of wielding magics she did not understand. Merzost is reality bending. It simply manifested her long held desire to be normal.
It was never elaborated on in the show so i must mention it here. Aleksander has siblings. I think most of the people in this fandom know this anyway but this is for those who don’t.
Baghra didn’t just happen to have one child who inherited her powers off the bat. She had been trying to have a child for one, maybe two, reasons, and they were that she was 1. bored 2. wanted a child with her powers so she could basically control them too.
She had many kids who didn’t have her powers, and abandoned them, until she had Aleksander, who she kept (and very obviously abused.)
I see posts saying how she’s such a girlboss and a good mother for some reason, but a woman who abandons all the children who aren’t useful to her, and manipulates and abuses the one that is, is neither of those things.
“The Darkling was wrong to use the fold.”
Im sorry, the next time other kingdoms are attacking a race of people, killing thousands of innocent and burning them, I’ll just send them a Christmas Card with:
Happy holidays,
btw if it isn’t a burden can you stop murdering my people, I would appreciate it. 😙✌🏻🤡
This was Alina's plan all the time
I’m putting together a response to another anon, and they had an aside in their response that I’ve been kicking around:
“In relation to Matthias/Nina, I’ve noticed the ongoing theme of violence being acceptable and humane when done through non-magical ways. It’s displayed briefly on the show with Alina and Aleksander talking about the Drüskelle who attacked her. She wasn’t horrified by the violence inflicted on her, but she found the Darkling monstrous because he didn’t use a sword to kill the poor man.”
And certainly that exchange immediately stood out to me when I watched it.
I consider it THE big thesis statement on Alina’s perception of power and violence within the show.
Alina is standing on the edge of the question the narrative will keep returning to: would it have been better if he had used a sword? Would it have been less frightening? Less monstrous? More recognizable? More human? What types of violence are justifiable?
And I think, in the end, the show’s answer is clear: Alina understands ordinary violence as something that can be separated from the person committing it. A sword is external. A gun is external. A uniform is external. A state is external, or at least can be treated that way. The man who wields the sword may be violent, but the sword itself carries the responsibility of the act. The weapon becomes the thing through which violence happens, which means the person holding it can still be imagined apart from it.
He can put the sword down. He can change. He can be convinced. He can be redeemed.
That is part of why characters like Matthias and Nikolai can be treated differently within her moral framework of the show. Both directly benefit from states built on corpses. Matthias is the hand of systemic anti-Grisha violence. Nikolai is the son and beneficiary of a monarchy that has turned Grisha bodies into kindling, sacrificed upon the altar of endless war. But because their violence is mediated through institutions, weapons, uniforms, ideology, inheritance, and duty, there is a way to imagine them as separable from it.
The blood is on the sword, not the hand.
The Darkling does not get that separation—in Alina’s mind, his power is the weapon. There is no sword to put down. No object to step away from. No clean division between the violence and the body committing it. His power means that he does not merely use a weapon—he is one.
East Ravka has turned them into children born to die in its wars. Cradle to grave, their bodies are understood through use: what they can do, what they can defend, what they can destroy, what they can provide to the state. The Grisha are not allowed the fantasy of clean hands because their power is treated as inseparable from their personhood. They are the weapon before they ever choose to act.
That is what makes Alina’s reaction so interesting. She is horrified by the Darkling’s violence, but the shape of that horror reveals something deeper than personal fear. She has inherited a worldview where non-magical violence can be civilized, contextualized, forgiven, or displaced onto the instrument, while Grisha violence is treated as an expression of nature. A sword can be sheathed. A soldier can be reformed. A prince can become better than his inheritance.
But a Grisha body remains suspect because the weapon is understood to live under the skin.
Bardugo said “Mal has never died.” And I’ve been trying to figure out how the amplifiers work for two days now because of it. The more logic I try to apply, the more illogical it becomes. I feel like this guy
Ship so good, Ravkans made fan art of them.
Alina in 100 years crashing out because she finally understands Alexander, and he's not there to be with her through forever because she killed him. And she knows she can't do it alone. Just like he couldn't. And his words are bouncing around her head taunting her because she can't remember his voice.