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All violators of these rules will be banned from space travel.
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Wormhole to the potato nebula: sideblog (silly edits + potatoes.)
Transmissions are always open for questions, thoughts, thots, and other inquiries.
oh my god i posted this and then went to work, and
story time
okay so to preface this, my hometown where i’m originally from is a really fucking weird place. like from the outside it seems like a normal suburban town, but once you’re there for awhile you get the feeling that’s something’s not…quite all together. a lot of people are really fucking weird there — so much so that that was a running joke in school growing up, that people in the town were just like that. everyone knew not to go out to the farm lands surrounding the town especially at night, we called it “the cuts” and people used to disappear out there all the time or get shot at by the especially weird people that would live out there. the news was and still is truly a thing of horror. every time i come back i’m regaled with even more stories of crazy shit that has happened there.
to put it in perspective we generally never had “normal crime” like robbery or anything like that when i lived there, though that did happen sometimes. the news stories were always like, “a kid was kidnapped by local residents and tortured in a house around the corner,” “a random person was chased down and shot for sport in a really nice neighborhood,” “someone was gored to death by a bull while out car shopping,” etc. (these are all real, btw). everyone does drugs and the whole town is located really close to a government site where they test nuclear weapons and chemicals and shit. this is how i grew up, in this bizarre environment.
i need to preface it this way so that you get that it’s weird. it’s a fucking weird place. i used to listen to the welcome to night vale podcast and make comparisons from it to my hometown, that’s how weird it is.
i only say this so you know that this town is where i got my orthodontics from.
all the kids in my town went to this one particular orthodontist. i also used to go to a dentist in town that a lot of people went to as well. i had a permanent retainer put on my bottom teeth after braces and no one had ever said anything to me about the model of retainer itself or it being weird type of retainer at all. i saw a ton of other people (mostly other kids that were my age at the time) that had the same type of retainer as me too so i never thought about it.
so i kept my retainer in — it’s never caused me problems and it keeps my teeth straight, why not?
however i went to a dentist for the first time in a metropolitan area now, and when he saw it in my mouth his literal first reaction was to say “uh can i ask you a question….what the hell is that”
LITERALLY the words that he said
which in hindsight makes almost too much sense. of course my town of all towns would put these weird unnecessary contraptions in kids’ mouths, and of course it happened so much that everyone just thought it was normal. that sounds exactly, to a T, like my hometown.
my permanent bottom retainer is apparently this prototype that is so rare that he’s literally never seen it before in his life, not in dental school, nowhere. it’s not that it’s an outdated type, it’s just rare as fuck. they were still staring at pictures of it on my chart in wonder when i left the office.
so just know somewhere out there, in a weird ass suburban town where they test nuclear weapons and a good portion of the residents go fucking nuts, there’s probably hundreds of people still walking around with this same contraption in their mouth that exists nowhere else in the world thinking, “yeah, that’s cool. that makes sense. let me go drink the definitely not-contaminated water now and never move away from here.”
Okay, so I looked into it and I think that the town is Tracy, California.
I looked up the bull-murder thing OP mentioned and Tracy seemed to be only town that came up with a matching case. Though the man didn’t actually die from his injuries everything else matches up one for one. So just to make sure that it was the right town I looked to see if there was any murder-torture of young people in Tracy, and unfortunately there was. It was a 17 year old boy who escaped and survived the torture. And just to solidify that it was in fact Tracy I looked up shootings in residential areas and there was one of a 20 year old man who was shot and killed in a nice neighborhood.
Okay, but I decided to look into Tracy more to find out more information about it and the town is super suspicious. There’s been a lot of murders and shooting in the town. Back in 2009 an 8 year old girl, Sandra Cantu, was kidnapped and murdered by a Sunday school teacher who said she had no idea why she killed Sandra. Another case happened in 2018 when four underage boys were shot and one was killed by four teenage boys. There’s a lot of news stories on shootings, homicides, and drug busts in that town. It’s a really cute town from the outside, if you just look up Tracy, California there’s a lot of really cute businesses and nice articles on sweet things that happen in the town, but if you actually look into it the town is really sketchy.
So yeah, this sketchy town with a military base, multiple homicides and shootings is maybe Tracy, California.
Honestly I wasn’t even surprised when I found out it was in California. Even less surprised when googled it and found out it was near the Bay Area. That sounds about right.
Washington Post is paywalling the article but it looks like Taylor Farms — a consumer bagged salad brand that also supplies produce to grocers and fast food chains like Taco Bell, Walmart, McDonald's, Chipotle, Burger King, KFC, and Meijer —may be at least one of the sources of the current cyclosporiasis outbreak.
Taylor makes bagged greens, salad kits, chopped salads, the works. Keep avoiding supermarket greens, but keep an especially close eye out for this brand/supplier. The above list of grocers and fast food chains is NOT exhaustive, so please continue getting lettuce and other raw produce taken off your burgers, sandwiches, etc.
Every once in a while, I wish the friendship meter from the Sims was real so that way when people tell me "I used Chat-GPT" they can visually see just how much respect I just lost for them in that moment.
One time an acquaintance told me she entered Snape's star chart into chatgpt and I could physically feel that meter dropping three separate times over the course of her sentence
Chapter 2: Bright Lights That Burn
A career ending mishap splits your life in two: keeping up the glamorous appearance of being a pro hero and then there's the underground hero agency office job you work at part time alongside Tenko Shimura, who seems offended by your very existence. As your grouchy coworker starts to warm up to you, you realize he may have a secret life of his own.
This series contains: spoilers, smut, canon typical violence, injuries.
[Previous Chapter] ✶ [False Advertising masterlist]
wc: 3.3k
Tenko Shimura wanted to be a hero growing up. It's all he ever dreamed of. It's not a job his family would approve of, but he couldn't help it. He'd play hero at school, hoping that when his quirk showed up later, it would be a great one that would allow him to save everyone. He knew it would be, he could feel it deep in his bones!
Tragedy struck shortly after. It wasn't his fault, he was just a kid. It's what everyone said, but he could tell they didn't mean it. There was a shadow of disappointment and fear draped over every interaction after that night.
When he was taken in by the number one hero he became even more determined to prove himself. With All Might's help, he started training and working on his quirk. Tenko studied hard to do well on the entrance exams. It was his chance at the life he's always dreamed of. He'd put the past behind him and become a hero in spite of it all. His grandma was a hero too, it was his destiny!
Needless to say, he didn't take it very well when the UA hero course rejection letter showed up.
Tenko locked himself in the bathroom for two days straight, refusing to come out for anything. He'd never admit it, but he cried for a solid day. At some point, All Might slid another acceptance letter under the door. It's not the letter he wanted, but it was something. And he was tired of crying and starting to get bored. Support might not be so bad, he did score high in math. Maybe he could transfer into the hero course eventually if there was an opening.
Openings came and went, Tenko was never chosen.
Over the years, he's mostly come to terms with it. He did well in the support class and became a hero equipment engineer. He joined the agency of his favorite hero, helping the world in his own small way. Some days that's easier than others.
Today, he's more unhappy about it than usual.
"Tenko, say you're sorry," Aizawa demands, having wrapped Tenko in his capturing weapon and dragged him in front of your desk.
"I'm sorry," Tenko groans caustically while rolling his eyes.
"Like you mean it," the scarf tightens a bit.
"You know I could make this even stronger if I—" It tightens a bit more, forcing out a huff of his breath.
"Ugh, fine. Okay, I'm sorry. Alright?" he groans.
"For?" Aizawa prompts him.
"For being confused when you showed u— ouch! Hey, fuck. Sorry for being a dick," he blurts out, "there, I said it. Are you happy now?"
Reluctantly, the restraints loosen and Aizawa leaves.
"Narc," Tenko huffs under his breath on his way back to his side of the office.
"I didn't say anything," you say as the door opens.
"Is this about yesterday?" Shirakumo asks, walking into the room and towards Tenko's desk. "She didn't say anything, I did. I overheard you through the door when we got back from our mission yesterday."
"You sold me out?" Tenko growls.
"Tenko, it's for your own good. Really. You won't be working down here alone forever, it's time to get used to that."
Tenko glares at him, "like you would expect her to be here."
"We did let you know you had a new coworker coming, it shouldn't have been a surprise. You're checking your emails, right?" he asks.
Tenko nods, "yeah, you know what I meant though."
"y/n is with us on special circumstances." He pauses, sorting through what he can and can't say. "There are some confidential pieces to it, but given that you're working so close, I don't see why they won't approve a request to get you clearance if I asked."
Shirakumo notices you wincing at the thought of Tenko knowing the private details of your life. You don't want anyone to know more than they have to. And while it's not so weird for a hero to coordinate with another agency to work on a case, sorting paperwork isn't exactly hero work. Tenko saw through that immediately.
"That is," he adds, "if she wants you to know. Boundaries are important too. But I'm not here to lecture you all day. I need your help with this." Shirakumo hands a piece of equipment to him, it's mangled beyond your recognition. Tenko looks down at it in horror. "And, while we were looking into new equipment, I ordered these." He hands him a pair of gloves. "The fabric allows you to send a quirk through it with as much or little force as you'd like. Maybe it'll inspire something, who knows." He winks at him and leaves.
You wonder who they'd be useful for. As far as you know none of the three heroes running this place have quirks that involve their hands and there aren't any sidekicks either. Maybe he'll modify them for Eraser's glasses or something.
Trying to find common ground, you loudly whisper, "Aizawa's kind of scary, isn't he."
"If by scary you mean cool, then sure," Tenko mumbles back while taking apart the twisted chunk of equipment on his desk. "Other heroes could probably learn a lot from him," he glares at you.
It's only 10am and you've now seen him stare daggers at everyone in the building. He must be a good engineer or something for them to keep him around. You go back to sorting paperwork and try to ignore him.
Of all the coworkers, why did you get the one who hates you?
"Move your arm a little to the left, a little more, perfect," the woman behind the camera instructs. "And hold that."
Lights flash with an audible pop. You hold your smile, hoping it doesn't come off as pained.
Usually you don't mind photo shoots. This morning, it's taking everything out of you.
It's only been a week since the incident and your side still aches when you move too much. This wasn't too bad when you spent an hour and a half in hair and makeup this morning, but having to contort and flex to make good angles for the camera is leaving you winded and sore.
On top of that, modeling a lingerie set that was based on your hero costume — the one you don't get to wear anymore — has been trying at best.
"We're good on this one," she calls out, "let's change into the next."
"You're doing great," your manager says, walking you back to the dressing room, "only one more set." She hands you a hanger with a delicate lacy gold bra and matching underwear. A tiny little replica of your hero costume. Of them all, this is your favorite in a way that warms your heart while sinking it. But —
"This is a lot smaller than I expected," you gulp. The last few sets were lingerie too, but they were full body pieces or had corsets that covered more than this.
"You can pull it off," she says, "it was designed specifically for you." She sets a few ibuprofen on the table with some water. "And you're doing great, it's the last one. We'll all be out here when you're ready."
Slipping off the last outfit, you change quickly and look at yourself in the mirror. It looks nice. You aren't sure if she was serious when she said it was designed for you, but you'd believe it with the way it fits.
Maybe it's the pain medication, but you make it through the last few shots without wincing. Soon enough, you're back in your work attire and heading out.
The bright lights leave black spots in your vision for the rest of the day.
At around eleven am, you arrive at work. Tenko is just walking in at the same time as you. He looks exhausted, like he was up all night. That piece of gear Shirakumo dropped off yesterday must have taken a while to fix. His eyes scan over you.
"Why do you wear all of that?" Tenko grumbles while pulling open the front door.
"All of what?" you reply.
"The hair, the makeup. You always look like you're ready for a photo shoot to come sit in a basement for half the day. There's no one to impress here."
You were just doing a photo shoot, but that doesn't matter when he's also talking about your clothes. “I just like to look presentable. And dressing nice is a way to show the people around you that you respect them enough to make an effort.” Tenko rolls his eyes at you.
“Well, it's just me today, everyone else is on an away mission.” He says, looking over your outfit confused. "So, you're not going to get Eraser's attention or respect or whatever you're looking for."
"What makes you think I'd specifically try to get his attention? And why do you care about my clothes and makeup? You've been rude ever since I got here. Do you hate me for being a woman or something? Is that it?"
“No,” he says quickly. “Why would I hate women?"
You stop in the middle of the hallway to stare at him, eyebrows raised.
"Let's get this over with then," Tenko continues, "I don't like you because you're fake. I know how girls like you are.”
“Girls like me?” you practically laugh, he doesn't know you at all. You push through the doors into your shared office space.
“Yeah, you're bubbly and giggly when you want something, then you'll be a complete dick behind my back. So let's just skip to that part and just leave me alone.”
Self fulfilling prophecy, you think as you sit on the floor next to a particularly big stack of forms. He returns to picking away at the broken equipment that's now scattered in pieces over his table. You wouldn't want to talk to him anyways.
A few minutes later, you realize you can't avoid him — it's part of your job.
"Hey, uh, Tenk—Shimura?" Approaching his desk slowly, you watch as he works his way further into the twisted chunk of gear he's been working on. "I have a question."
"I might have an answer," he retorts.
"So, uhm, these files. They don't all add up. I have this stack of receipts for supplies, but I can't find any record of them being assigned in use."
"Oh," he grumbles, flipping the chunk of metal with a thud. "That would be an Aizawa issue."
"…Issue?" you ask.
"Yep," he grumbles, pulling another piece from the mess. "He buys things, takes them into the school, and they disappear. An Aizawa issue."
"Uh thanks," you turn to leave, returning to your desk without any clue what to do with that information now that you have it.
"Or," he adds, "it could have been Yamada."
"Yamada? Let me guess, he takes things to the school too?"
"He does. He also forgets his paperwork."
"Oh." You sit with it for a moment, deciding swipe the receipts into their own folder for later. In the grand scheme of things, a few unused items doesn't mean much in most agencies. Still, with only three heroes, you thought they'd be more organized. At least Tenko is somewhat cooperative with you, even if he is an asshole.
The clock hits 6:30pm and you've made it through the files you'd set out for your self to sort for the day (and then some.)
So now what?
You're beginning to hate the time you spend at home. There's nothing left to fill your days with and no distractions to keep you sane. What do normal people do to pass the time?
The photo shoot crew from this morning recommended dating. Having never dated or even had time to even think about going on a date, you let them download an app on your phone for that. Checking it at the end of the work day, you've so far had two matches — one accusing you of catfishing people, the other saying you look like an off brand version of yourself.
Fun.
Closing the app in a rush, you tap on the search bar and look up some better ideas. More calming ones, at least.
Baths seem to top the list so you think you'll start there. There's a place down the street that sells bath bombs and you think you can make it there before they close if you leave now.
Tenko is still working his way through the wreckage that was dropped on his desk yesterday morning. He doesn't look up as you leave.
When you get home, you toss your bag on the couch and lay down for a minute. No matter how easy the task, you find yourself constantly exhausted and out of breath. And to think, last week you were chasing villains through the streets.
Making your way to the bathroom, you realize you have this huge tub you've never used. The warm water begins to fill the basin and you absentmindedly add a few scoops of the salts you bought. The water turns a deep shade of red, swirling as you step in.
Once more, you find yourself wondering — so now, what happens? You did the activity, but your brain is still running against your will. Something brushes your leg. In a panic, you grab it out of the water — only to find another chunk of gold confetti.
The alarm chirps from your nightstand. Pulling your sleeping mask onto your forehead, the light softly fills the room.
It's your birthday.
After some feeble attempt at stretching only results in pain, you switch your attention to your phone instead.
Nothing.
You expected your family to be out of service for a few days, but thought at least one of your old coworkers would have remembered that it's your birthday. Your manager at the agency usually brought in a sheet cake that covered half the table. Everyone came by. It occurs to you these were all work friends, who were only friends at work and not outside.
Now it's just you out here, alone.
Maybe not for long, you tell yourself while checking the dating app again.
There's a new match who only connected to send you the message "AI slop, the Golden Hero would never wear that ugly sweater".
This time you delete the app entirely.
Dragging your feet, you make your way to work. It's not the longest train ride, but long enough for your mind to wander. You try to keep the thoughts from pouring over, but you can't help it. By the time you're back on the sidewalk, youre hiding your tears under sunglasses and a huge hoodie. A familiar face glares at you as you approach the door together.
"What, no respect for us today?" Tenko grates, eyes raking over your outfit.
"Kindly fuck off Tenko, I am not in the mood," you spit back without thinking. As you come into the building, you relucantly take off the oversized sunglasses and shove them in your pocket.
“Whoa,” his face falls the moment he sees your puffy eyes. “Are you okay?”
“'m fine,” you mumble pressing past him. “I don't want to talk about it.”
He leaves you alone through the day, mostly. Working on something new Shirakumo requested.
Between your mental state and the constant urge to check your phone, your productivity is nearly nonexistent for the day. As usual, the heroes come and go, dropping more paperwork on your desk.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Yamada exclaimed on his way through. Tenko glanced up, stirring at his desk.
"Thanks," you mumbled sheepishly. As much as you hoped someone would care, you also wanted to make it through the work day without anyone here noticing. So much for that.
Birthday greetings followed after from everyone in the office. Well, almost everyone.
Time dragged on, making you wish you could be anywhere else while also knowing there's nowhere to be. Shirakumo went out on duty, followed by Aizaway. Yamada left, loudly, around 7pm.
That just leaves you and Tenko, who always seems to stay late. At around 8:30, he promptly jumps up.
"I know it's your birthday," he says point blank, staring down at you while you're at your desk.
"That it is," you reply, in a lackluster tone.
"Come on," he walks to the door and waves for you to join.
"What makes you think I'm going with you? What if I have big plans?" you reply, standing and pushing your chair in.
"You don't," he responds. "Or you would have just said so. And it's late. You don't usually work this late, especially on your birthday. If you had plans, you would have just left." Once more, he waves you out the door. "Come on. No one should be alone on their birthday, even if they're…you."
"Charming invitation," you reply, following him anyways. You walk with him into the elevator, legs seeming to move on their own. Swiping a keycard, he hits the highest number. The floor moves with a lurch and you're on your way up.
As the doors ding and open, you're met with an almost industrial space. Is he trying to kill you or something? Gesturing you down a hallway with too much concrete, Tenko moves through the space with too much familiarity.
"Where are we going?" you ask.
"It's a surprise," he says, "that's traditional, right?"
Moving around a few corners, he comes to a heavy metal door. One that looks like you're not supposed to go through it. With another keycard swipe, he does. You follow him up the stairs, embarrassed by how out of breath you are from the single flight. Steadying your breath as much as you can, you barely notice as the world opens up around you.
The city surrounds you in a sea of lights. He sits at the edge with his feet dangling over the side of the railing. Too much confidence, you think, suddenly feeling a newfound pang of fear without your quirk. Still, you push through it to join him.
The two of you sit in silence for a moment, taking it all in.
That is, until he talks and ruins it.
"So, golden hero, why aren't you off saving the populace tonight?" Tenko asks sarcastically.
"I can't," you retort. It's been bad enough having to think about it at all, you definitely don't want to have this discussion with your enemy. Coworker. Whatever he is. The best you can do is end this conversation before it gets too far. "That's not my job now," you say much more quietly.
Unfortunately for you, Tenko won't take that for an answer. "Oh really? And why is that?"
“Like I said, it's because I can't." You exhale, staring off into the distance. Lights blur into dots, giving way to a purple sky. Nights like this, you can almost see the stars shining through. It would be pretty in any other situation. "I can't," you repeat, "because I don't have a quirk.”
“That is bullshit,”Tenko retorts. “I've seen the news before, do you actually expect me to believe that?”
You don't respond, wanting to implode. If dying stars get to collapse in on themselves, why don't you? Instead, you sit in silence as the world folds around you.
“So, you're telling me, that if I pushed you off the top of this building, you'd do nothing to save yourself?”
“I'm telling you I couldn't." The tears well in your eyes and you plead them to not spill over. Not now, not with him around.
"Was it all staged or—"
"No," you interrupt him, "none of it was staged. I had a quirk, now I don't. Now," your voice wavers, "now it's just gone."
You'll never get used to saying that.
Tenko is silent, having run out of insults for the day.
Maybe he's not the worst. At least not all the time.
The best part is OP got fired because their boss asked why they weren’t “incorporating blockchain technology” into the video switcher they were building and OP straight up said “you have no idea what you’re talking about” and went to lunch
Chapter 2: Bright Lights That Burn
A career ending mishap splits your life in two: keeping up the glamorous appearance of being a pro hero and then there's the underground hero agency office job you work at part time alongside Tenko Shimura, who seems offended by your very existence. As your grouchy coworker starts to warm up to you, you realize he may have a secret life of his own.
This series contains: spoilers, smut, canon typical violence, injuries.
[Previous Chapter] ✶ [False Advertising masterlist]
wc: 3.3k
Tenko Shimura wanted to be a hero growing up. It's all he ever dreamed of. It's not a job his family would approve of, but he couldn't help it. He'd play hero at school, hoping that when his quirk showed up later, it would be a great one that would allow him to save everyone. He knew it would be, he could feel it deep in his bones!
Tragedy struck shortly after. It wasn't his fault, he was just a kid. It's what everyone said, but he could tell they didn't mean it. There was a shadow of disappointment and fear draped over every interaction after that night.
When he was taken in by the number one hero he became even more determined to prove himself. With All Might's help, he started training and working on his quirk. Tenko studied hard to do well on the entrance exams. It was his chance at the life he's always dreamed of. He'd put the past behind him and become a hero in spite of it all. His grandma was a hero too, it was his destiny!
Needless to say, he didn't take it very well when the UA hero course rejection letter showed up.
Tenko locked himself in the bathroom for two days straight, refusing to come out for anything. He'd never admit it, but he cried for a solid day. At some point, All Might slid another acceptance letter under the door. It's not the letter he wanted, but it was something. And he was tired of crying and starting to get bored. Support might not be so bad, he did score high in math. Maybe he could transfer into the hero course eventually if there was an opening.
Openings came and went, Tenko was never chosen.
Over the years, he's mostly come to terms with it. He did well in the support class and became a hero equipment engineer. He joined the agency of his favorite hero, helping the world in his own small way. Some days that's easier than others.
Today, he's more unhappy about it than usual.
"Tenko, say you're sorry," Aizawa demands, having wrapped Tenko in his capturing weapon and dragged him in front of your desk.
"I'm sorry," Tenko groans caustically while rolling his eyes.
"Like you mean it," the scarf tightens a bit.
"You know I could make this even stronger if I—" It tightens a bit more, forcing out a huff of his breath.
"Ugh, fine. Okay, I'm sorry. Alright?" he groans.
"For?" Aizawa prompts him.
"For being confused when you showed u— ouch! Hey, fuck. Sorry for being a dick," he blurts out, "there, I said it. Are you happy now?"
Reluctantly, the restraints loosen and Aizawa leaves.
"Narc," Tenko huffs under his breath on his way back to his side of the office.
"I didn't say anything," you say as the door opens.
"Is this about yesterday?" Shirakumo asks, walking into the room and towards Tenko's desk. "She didn't say anything, I did. I overheard you through the door when we got back from our mission yesterday."
"You sold me out?" Tenko growls.
"Tenko, it's for your own good. Really. You won't be working down here alone forever, it's time to get used to that."
Tenko glares at him, "like you would expect her to be here."
"We did let you know you had a new coworker coming, it shouldn't have been a surprise. You're checking your emails, right?" he asks.
Tenko nods, "yeah, you know what I meant though."
"y/n is with us on special circumstances." He pauses, sorting through what he can and can't say. "There are some confidential pieces to it, but given that you're working so close, I don't see why they won't approve a request to get you clearance if I asked."
Shirakumo notices you wincing at the thought of Tenko knowing the private details of your life. You don't want anyone to know more than they have to. And while it's not so weird for a hero to coordinate with another agency to work on a case, sorting paperwork isn't exactly hero work. Tenko saw through that immediately.
"That is," he adds, "if she wants you to know. Boundaries are important too. But I'm not here to lecture you all day. I need your help with this." Shirakumo hands a piece of equipment to him, it's mangled beyond your recognition. Tenko looks down at it in horror. "And, while we were looking into new equipment, I ordered these." He hands him a pair of gloves. "The fabric allows you to send a quirk through it with as much or little force as you'd like. Maybe it'll inspire something, who knows." He winks at him and leaves.
You wonder who they'd be useful for. As far as you know none of the three heroes running this place have quirks that involve their hands and there aren't any sidekicks either. Maybe he'll modify them for Eraser's glasses or something.
Trying to find common ground, you loudly whisper, "Aizawa's kind of scary, isn't he."
"If by scary you mean cool, then sure," Tenko mumbles back while taking apart the twisted chunk of equipment on his desk. "Other heroes could probably learn a lot from him," he glares at you.
It's only 10am and you've now seen him stare daggers at everyone in the building. He must be a good engineer or something for them to keep him around. You go back to sorting paperwork and try to ignore him.
Of all the coworkers, why did you get the one who hates you?
"Move your arm a little to the left, a little more, perfect," the woman behind the camera instructs. "And hold that."
Lights flash with an audible pop. You hold your smile, hoping it doesn't come off as pained.
Usually you don't mind photo shoots. This morning, it's taking everything out of you.
It's only been a week since the incident and your side still aches when you move too much. This wasn't too bad when you spent an hour and a half in hair and makeup this morning, but having to contort and flex to make good angles for the camera is leaving you winded and sore.
On top of that, modeling a lingerie set that was based on your hero costume — the one you don't get to wear anymore — has been trying at best.
"We're good on this one," she calls out, "let's change into the next."
"You're doing great," your manager says, walking you back to the dressing room, "only one more set." She hands you a hanger with a delicate lacy gold bra and matching underwear. A tiny little replica of your hero costume. Of them all, this is your favorite in a way that warms your heart while sinking it. But —
"This is a lot smaller than I expected," you gulp. The last few sets were lingerie too, but they were full body pieces or had corsets that covered more than this.
"You can pull it off," she says, "it was designed specifically for you." She sets a few ibuprofen on the table with some water. "And you're doing great, it's the last one. We'll all be out here when you're ready."
Slipping off the last outfit, you change quickly and look at yourself in the mirror. It looks nice. You aren't sure if she was serious when she said it was designed for you, but you'd believe it with the way it fits.
Maybe it's the pain medication, but you make it through the last few shots without wincing. Soon enough, you're back in your work attire and heading out.
The bright lights leave black spots in your vision for the rest of the day.
At around eleven am, you arrive at work. Tenko is just walking in at the same time as you. He looks exhausted, like he was up all night. That piece of gear Shirakumo dropped off yesterday must have taken a while to fix. His eyes scan over you.
"Why do you wear all of that?" Tenko grumbles while pulling open the front door.
"All of what?" you reply.
"The hair, the makeup. You always look like you're ready for a photo shoot to come sit in a basement for half the day. There's no one to impress here."
You were just doing a photo shoot, but that doesn't matter when he's also talking about your clothes. “I just like to look presentable. And dressing nice is a way to show the people around you that you respect them enough to make an effort.” Tenko rolls his eyes at you.
“Well, it's just me today, everyone else is on an away mission.” He says, looking over your outfit confused. "So, you're not going to get Eraser's attention or respect or whatever you're looking for."
"What makes you think I'd specifically try to get his attention? And why do you care about my clothes and makeup? You've been rude ever since I got here. Do you hate me for being a woman or something? Is that it?"
“No,” he says quickly. “Why would I hate women?"
You stop in the middle of the hallway to stare at him, eyebrows raised.
"Let's get this over with then," Tenko continues, "I don't like you because you're fake. I know how girls like you are.”
“Girls like me?” you practically laugh, he doesn't know you at all. You push through the doors into your shared office space.
“Yeah, you're bubbly and giggly when you want something, then you'll be a complete dick behind my back. So let's just skip to that part and just leave me alone.”
Self fulfilling prophecy, you think as you sit on the floor next to a particularly big stack of forms. He returns to picking away at the broken equipment that's now scattered in pieces over his table. You wouldn't want to talk to him anyways.
A few minutes later, you realize you can't avoid him — it's part of your job.
"Hey, uh, Tenk—Shimura?" Approaching his desk slowly, you watch as he works his way further into the twisted chunk of gear he's been working on. "I have a question."
"I might have an answer," he retorts.
"So, uhm, these files. They don't all add up. I have this stack of receipts for supplies, but I can't find any record of them being assigned in use."
"Oh," he grumbles, flipping the chunk of metal with a thud. "That would be an Aizawa issue."
"…Issue?" you ask.
"Yep," he grumbles, pulling another piece from the mess. "He buys things, takes them into the school, and they disappear. An Aizawa issue."
"Uh thanks," you turn to leave, returning to your desk without any clue what to do with that information now that you have it.
"Or," he adds, "it could have been Yamada."
"Yamada? Let me guess, he takes things to the school too?"
"He does. He also forgets his paperwork."
"Oh." You sit with it for a moment, deciding swipe the receipts into their own folder for later. In the grand scheme of things, a few unused items doesn't mean much in most agencies. Still, with only three heroes, you thought they'd be more organized. At least Tenko is somewhat cooperative with you, even if he is an asshole.
The clock hits 6:30pm and you've made it through the files you'd set out for your self to sort for the day (and then some.)
So now what?
You're beginning to hate the time you spend at home. There's nothing left to fill your days with and no distractions to keep you sane. What do normal people do to pass the time?
The photo shoot crew from this morning recommended dating. Having never dated or even had time to even think about going on a date, you let them download an app on your phone for that. Checking it at the end of the work day, you've so far had two matches — one accusing you of catfishing people, the other saying you look like an off brand version of yourself.
Fun.
Closing the app in a rush, you tap on the search bar and look up some better ideas. More calming ones, at least.
Baths seem to top the list so you think you'll start there. There's a place down the street that sells bath bombs and you think you can make it there before they close if you leave now.
Tenko is still working his way through the wreckage that was dropped on his desk yesterday morning. He doesn't look up as you leave.
When you get home, you toss your bag on the couch and lay down for a minute. No matter how easy the task, you find yourself constantly exhausted and out of breath. And to think, last week you were chasing villains through the streets.
Making your way to the bathroom, you realize you have this huge tub you've never used. The warm water begins to fill the basin and you absentmindedly add a few scoops of the salts you bought. The water turns a deep shade of red, swirling as you step in.
Once more, you find yourself wondering — so now, what happens? You did the activity, but your brain is still running against your will. Something brushes your leg. In a panic, you grab it out of the water — only to find another chunk of gold confetti.
The alarm chirps from your nightstand. Pulling your sleeping mask onto your forehead, the light softly fills the room.
It's your birthday.
After some feeble attempt at stretching only results in pain, you switch your attention to your phone instead.
Nothing.
You expected your family to be out of service for a few days, but thought at least one of your old coworkers would have remembered that it's your birthday. Your manager at the agency usually brought in a sheet cake that covered half the table. Everyone came by. It occurs to you these were all work friends, who were only friends at work and not outside.
Now it's just you out here, alone.
Maybe not for long, you tell yourself while checking the dating app again.
There's a new match who only connected to send you the message "AI slop, the Golden Hero would never wear that ugly sweater".
This time you delete the app entirely.
Dragging your feet, you make your way to work. It's not the longest train ride, but long enough for your mind to wander. You try to keep the thoughts from pouring over, but you can't help it. By the time you're back on the sidewalk, youre hiding your tears under sunglasses and a huge hoodie. A familiar face glares at you as you approach the door together.
"What, no respect for us today?" Tenko grates, eyes raking over your outfit.
"Kindly fuck off Tenko, I am not in the mood," you spit back without thinking. As you come into the building, you relucantly take off the oversized sunglasses and shove them in your pocket.
“Whoa,” his face falls the moment he sees your puffy eyes. “Are you okay?”
“'m fine,” you mumble pressing past him. “I don't want to talk about it.”
He leaves you alone through the day, mostly. Working on something new Shirakumo requested.
Between your mental state and the constant urge to check your phone, your productivity is nearly nonexistent for the day. As usual, the heroes come and go, dropping more paperwork on your desk.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Yamada exclaimed on his way through. Tenko glanced up, stirring at his desk.
"Thanks," you mumbled sheepishly. As much as you hoped someone would care, you also wanted to make it through the work day without anyone here noticing. So much for that.
Birthday greetings followed after from everyone in the office. Well, almost everyone.
Time dragged on, making you wish you could be anywhere else while also knowing there's nowhere to be. Shirakumo went out on duty, followed by Aizaway. Yamada left, loudly, around 7pm.
That just leaves you and Tenko, who always seems to stay late. At around 8:30, he promptly jumps up.
"I know it's your birthday," he says point blank, staring down at you while you're at your desk.
"That it is," you reply, in a lackluster tone.
"Come on," he walks to the door and waves for you to join.
"What makes you think I'm going with you? What if I have big plans?" you reply, standing and pushing your chair in.
"You don't," he responds. "Or you would have just said so. And it's late. You don't usually work this late, especially on your birthday. If you had plans, you would have just left." Once more, he waves you out the door. "Come on. No one should be alone on their birthday, even if they're…you."
"Charming invitation," you reply, following him anyways. You walk with him into the elevator, legs seeming to move on their own. Swiping a keycard, he hits the highest number. The floor moves with a lurch and you're on your way up.
As the doors ding and open, you're met with an almost industrial space. Is he trying to kill you or something? Gesturing you down a hallway with too much concrete, Tenko moves through the space with too much familiarity.
"Where are we going?" you ask.
"It's a surprise," he says, "that's traditional, right?"
Moving around a few corners, he comes to a heavy metal door. One that looks like you're not supposed to go through it. With another keycard swipe, he does. You follow him up the stairs, embarrassed by how out of breath you are from the single flight. Steadying your breath as much as you can, you barely notice as the world opens up around you.
The city surrounds you in a sea of lights. He sits at the edge with his feet dangling over the side of the railing. Too much confidence, you think, suddenly feeling a newfound pang of fear without your quirk. Still, you push through it to join him.
The two of you sit in silence for a moment, taking it all in.
That is, until he talks and ruins it.
"So, golden hero, why aren't you off saving the populace tonight?" Tenko asks sarcastically.
"I can't," you retort. It's been bad enough having to think about it at all, you definitely don't want to have this discussion with your enemy. Coworker. Whatever he is. The best you can do is end this conversation before it gets too far. "That's not my job now," you say much more quietly.
Unfortunately for you, Tenko won't take that for an answer. "Oh really? And why is that?"
“Like I said, it's because I can't." You exhale, staring off into the distance. Lights blur into dots, giving way to a purple sky. Nights like this, you can almost see the stars shining through. It would be pretty in any other situation. "I can't," you repeat, "because I don't have a quirk.”
“That is bullshit,”Tenko retorts. “I've seen the news before, do you actually expect me to believe that?”
You don't respond, wanting to implode. If dying stars get to collapse in on themselves, why don't you? Instead, you sit in silence as the world folds around you.
“So, you're telling me, that if I pushed you off the top of this building, you'd do nothing to save yourself?”
“I'm telling you I couldn't." The tears well in your eyes and you plead them to not spill over. Not now, not with him around.
"Was it all staged or—"
"No," you interrupt him, "none of it was staged. I had a quirk, now I don't. Now," your voice wavers, "now it's just gone."
You'll never get used to saying that.
Tenko is silent, having run out of insults for the day.
Maybe he's not the worst. At least not all the time.
After being asked to come in so the coworker who has been misgendering me "wouldn't be alone" I said no and found out half the shop has brought up issues with her. ig she said something racist too (!!!!) and has generally been prickly to everyone but the owner — who I now have an appointment to meet with next week and talk to about this. Eeep.
The makers of Kinktober 2025 are back again with a brand new list! The graphics are once again created by latte-cucumber. Check out our AO3 collection, or keep reading for more information.
More information
Kinktober is a kinky October prompt challenge that’s been running in one form or another since 2016. There are three prompts for each day in October, and the challenge is to use one (or more!) of the prompts to create something for that day. If you don’t want to use any of the three daily prompts, you can swap them out for the bonus prompts at the bottom of the prompt list.
If you have any questions, check our FAQs. Unfortunately, due to personal commitments, we won't be opening our askbox for questions this year. We've made it as rules-light as possible, though, so if your question is "Can I do this?", the answer is almost certainly yes!
Seeing people I know and like using AI is making me understand the protagonists of those old time sci fi dystopia's.
"Oh I don't normally use AI, I just wanted it to plan my trip"
You lived on this planet for decades, you know what you like, there are hundreds of websites where you can type into any search engine " things to do in [area]" and have at least a hundred different options.
"Oh I only use it so I can figure out what to make during the week with what I have"
The most popular website as you type in "recipes" into google have sections where you click dinner- quick and easy and those usually rely on staples + 1 or 2 items. I found 30 recipes on chicken alone.
"I had a writing idea, so I typed a few sentences into Chat GPT and I was able to write 20 pages with it."
