[wizardarchetypes]

i love ordering a latte with oatmilk and a single shot instead of two and decaf espresso. like give me a coffee/dairy drink but break its arms and legs first so it can't beat me up thank you

[wizardarchetypes]

one time i forgot hot chocolates exist so i ordered 'an oatmilk mocha without espresso' and they charged me €5 for a mocha (latte) per the menu. another day at the same coffee truck i ordered another no-espresso mocha & the barista was like 'so...hot chocolate?' i was like oh my god. yeah. you're correct. so they made me an oatmilk hot chocolate and charged me just €3. same exact drink but hot chocolates are €3 on the menu. fair shout. noted to always order it as a hot chocolate from then on.

then a few weeks ago i desperately wanted a warm drink for my upset stomach but couldn't handle chocolate so i said, 'is it possible to just get steamed oatmilk? i'll pay full price for a latte or whatever drink if you don't have a way to charge it.'

and the barista was like, 'nah, we can do that, no problem' and charged me 0.50¢ for the steamed oatmilk which has me wondering how much chocolate syrup costs.

this isn't going anywhere. just thinkin. imagine like i'm your mom with nothing going on, standing in your bedroom door saying all this while you're trying to watch a show.

[trans--ender-deactivated2021061]

minecraft isnt a horror game huh? then explain why my ass has been slapped by several berry bushes while on peaceful?

[trans--ender-deactivated2021061]

what the fuck was i on last night

[the-minecraft-blog]

Peaceful, apparently

[popsunner]

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

[popsunner]

Don’t do this to me

[professional-chaotic-dumbass]

my brother in christ you made the post

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

you're laughing. charles dickens had a son named plorn and you're laughing

[mediummarketpaperback]

HE HAD A SON NAMED

WHAT

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

Plorn

[mediummarketpaperback]

NICK I LOOKED IT UP AND SAW NOTHING OF THE SORT IS THIS A PRANK

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

technically his name was edward but everyone called him plorn

[mediummarketpaperback]

Edward “Plorn” Dickens. my god.

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

I have something worse

[mediummarketpaperback]

oh???

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[mediummarketpaperback]

imagine getting stuck with the nickname Plorn

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

imagine getting sent to live in the Australian outback when you were sixteen

[mediummarketpaperback]

WHY WERE THEY SO CRUEL TO MY BOY PLORN

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

I have an answer to that one too

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[cogentranting]

The face of a man whose father nicknamed him Plorn.

[elodieunderglass]

Born without a groove 😔

[linguisticparadox]

[telomeke]

With each addition to this, I find myself nodding and murmuring, "Mm hm. The Plorn Dickens."

‌

[redstonedust]

funny thing about anxiety is sometimes it kind of breaks your sense of danger. like i am known for repeatedly putting myself in situations that make my friends go "bro you couldve died. werent you scared?" and the answer is 👍 yjeah. i did it scared. i do everything scared. i didnt know that was the actual important kind of scary because i usually have to ignore my fears to function in society. it will happen again. watch out.

[juniper-petunia]

they should make a version of socializing that doesn’t make you feel like you’re still the weird 12 year old kid that doesn’t know why she’s not normal like the other kids

[dragongirlbunny]

time for a fun game called can we finish a shower before the edible hits

[dragongirlbunny]

good lird there was boobs soapy in therw 😳

[zxid]

collection

[fishlung8877]

[jomjjeoro]

hey guys. this is my invention. check it out

[bastionkeeper]

listen no matter how depressed I am whenever this post shows up on my dash I fucking lose it I just laugh so hard, it’s such a good post. The way it’s presented? Soap on a sink nozzle, okay clearly this is some sort of handwashing appliance. Then there’s just water going everywhere no further explanation it’s so good I’m so happy

[b0nkcreat]

Random stinging pain in my neck 👀

[creepymutelilbugger]

atacked by my #MindWasp

[b0nkcreat]

Can you put those things on a leash please

[creepymutelilbugger]

Yeah. a really Long one so they can still get u tho

[b0nkcreat]

Commentary on: Society

[kosmogrl]

oooh I get it it’s always gonna be because of the environment I grew up in

[aceofpans]

it’s because of the curse

[emil]

"Peggle make phone calls" has become shorthand for "fuck it, whatever" for me but no one ever knows what im talkingabout and it's also longer (longhand?)

[emil]

peggle make phone calls

[cathartidae]

hey. dont cry. 566 california condors, okay? 369 free flying.[1] it's gonna be okay.

[cathartidae]

for the record, in 1987 there were 27. [2] things can get better.

[cathartidae]

HEY. DONT CRY. 607 CALIFORNIA CONDORS, OKAY? 392 FREE FLYING. [3]

[vixvigil]

it’s never a normal temperature anymore it’s always some fucking bullshit

[uncertainlys]

i hope everything works out in the end because i am so so scared

[gumy-shark]

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

[latedawnsandearlysunsets]

three of them

[olmec-colossal-head]

Courage, Anxiety, and Despair Watching the Battle by James Sant (ca. 1850)