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@depressedtotheleft
PLEASEEEEE HELP đ I'm a single mother , me and my son is biracial. I'm in a tough situation. I have a 5 year old that I don't want to see me hurting. During this time I lost my job and I continued to go back to school. I need some help. I'm in a situation I want to get out of and have no money. I'm asking for a small donation. Anything helps. I usually turn to my mom but she has passed away this year and also my brother. Please. Please if anyone could help. I don't want my child to keep seeing me down and that's not how a man supposed to treat a woman. Please any donation will help đđźđ˘ I feel like I'm trapped I NEED out my situation. Sorry I'm just in DESPERATE need đ I'm drained đŞ my cash app is $yellowgirl1993, I have other options below. Thanks so much anyone that helps I just want to leave and be able to leave with my son. He doesn't need to see this, he was a victim of his own Dad's abuse đĽđĽđ˘đ Please Reblog as much as you can this is my only hope đđź
Go to paypal.me/paradiseoflove20 and type in the amount. Since itâs PayPal, it's easy and secure. Donât have a PayPal account? No worries.
My Venmo: @ Dionna-Willoughby
http://cash.app/$yellowgirl1993
https://venmo.com/code?user_id=3004667030142976208
Pay. Get paid. Shop. Share. Venmo is a digital wallet that makes money easier for everyone from students to small businesses. More than 60 m
Genuine question?? Im a 19 y/o lesbian and ?? I dont find p*nis attractive does that make me a TERF?
Iâm happy you sent this ask, because itâs a perfect place to talk about how someone can get hurt, feel wronged, and become susceptible to extremist recruiting.
First off, treat this as a simple yes or no question, asked with zero surrounding context, the platonic idea of penis preference if you will. âI donât find penises attractiveâ is not a sentiment that makes you a TERF. Youâre okay not liking them. My nonbinary wife doesnât particularly like them, yet they are married to me (who has one) and we love each other more than anything in the world.Â
In fact, in the abstract, I donât like âem much either, and I own one! Ridiculous looking thing, wish I didnât have to deal with it. A general dislike of genitals doesnât make you a TERF⌠not by itself.
Now, here is where the critical thinking comes in, because if you posted something like that on Tumblr or something, it has a different context. You might not even know! It could be a totally innocent mistake, and it happens, and some women either get criticized in ways that makes them feel attacked, or actually attacked because you never know if what you post online is hitting someone on a bad day or a good day.Â
The context first of all is, without any clarifying statements, saying you donât like a genital could imply youâre reducing anyone with that particular set of genitals down to their genitals only. And it could result in either someone telling you it sounds TERFy (if theyâre trying to be gentle) or calling you a TERF (if theyâre out of spoons) because thatâs what TERFs do. Hereâs where it becomes a recruit pitch.
You say âI donât like penises.â This doesnât mean youâre saying you dislike trans women (not all of whom have penises anyway), but if you get the above lecture/yelling, a radfem can come along and empathetically agree how unfair it is that someone made you hurt for saying you donât like a genital, and itâs not fair to tell a lesbian she has to sleep with a male or sheâs a TERF and- OH WAIT A MINUTE!
Hold up, it looks like they were just being nice but wait wait, they just slid cozily from âitâs okay not to like a penisâ to âanyone with a penis is male.â See that? Like a sleight of hand, once youâve agreed with that premises, saying âI donât like penisesâ suddenly becomes attached to âand anyone with a penis is male.â
Alright now in context, going back this kind of equivalency is so common with radfems that at this point saying you donât like a genital is what we call a dogwhistle. Itâs a phrase which is seemingly innocent, and can be innocent, which has been so widely appropriated by a hate group that it carries extra connotations in a certain context. Contexts like posting on Tumblr, which happens to have a particularly large trans population.
Now you canât know every single dogwhistle because thatâs the whole reason they exist - so normal people donât spot someoneâs bigotry and it looks like a disenfranchised group is getting angry over an innocent statement.
And lastly, which you probably already know, but generally not being interested in something doesnât have to equate to disliking anyone with that trait, or even not being attracted to someone with that trait. I bring this up because the difference between a lesbian who just generally doesnât like a genital and a TERF is that the TERF things anyone with a penis is automatically bad and a male and probably reading this right now thinks Iâm saying you have to have sex with men or like penises, somehow, despite saying exactly the opposite.
You may have a general preference, but in practice Iâm sure youâve already found a difference between âI am physically attracted to how this person looksâ and âHoly shit I think this person is amazing and everything about them is wonderful.â If you havenât had that experience yet, I can promise you some day you will. Not necessarily over genitals, but some day someone, or many someones, will be part of your life and youâll value every part of them, whether or not itâs something you normally find abstractly attractive.
Keep your heart open to kindness and caring for other people, keep your mind open to constructive criticism, and youâll never be a radfem or TERF or SWERF or whatever. Thatâs all.
Saw the first new bit of anon hate of this post in awhile, so I guess itâs having another go round.
The most circulated version is an older one, but this is the one where I made some edits to make the language more inclusive, so Iâd be happier if this version made the rounds.
Could you elaborate on the 80% of morphine addicts do the drugs less or quit after 5 years bit? I'd never heard of that and it seems pretty counter-intuitive what little i know of drug addiction but I would love to hear more, I'd love to be proven wrong.
yeah so basically drug addiction, across the board, actually has the best prognosis of any mental illness without any treatment whatsoever. The vast majority of people who meet criteria for addiction to any drug (75-95%) do not seek treatment and no longer meet criteria within 5-10 years. Depending on the drug in question, about half of this population becomes abstinent and half continues to use their drug of choice and/or other drugs without meeting criteria for addiction. These are federal statistics published by NIDA.Â
Here is the stereotype: drug addiction is a progressive, incurable brain disease that will cause worsening dysfunction without a 12-step inspired treatment plan and lifelong abstinence. Once you are an addict, you are always an addict, because it is a brain disease. The addiction brain disease is caused by exposure to drugs. This may certainly be true for some people, but it is obviously false for the vast majority of people who meet criteria for addiction, for any drug. It is not based on evidence, it is based on dogma. It is also a self-fulfilling prophecy that teaches patients they are powerless and must practice lifelong vigilance - if they donât feel like thatâs true for them, itâs because theyâre dangerously reckless and their judgement is distorted by their brain disease! Studies have shown that addicts who believe in the medical model of addiction are more likely to relapse than those who do not.
This dogma arose from the origin and intensification of the racist drug war, and to a lesser degree from the temperance movement. For a variety of material reasons, social violence and dysfunction arising from race, class and economic disparity was attributed to the intrinsic properties of drugs rather than these factors. (To be fair, abundant cheap alcohol did not exactly improve matters much.) During the victorian era, addiction was commonplace and viewed as a harmless eccentricity of the wealthy. Indeed, the surgeon my hospital is named for was a lifelong morphine addict himself. Everyone just thought he had really steady hands. It is only once drugs became associated with poor people, black people, asian and hispanic people, and communists that they became evil. The stereotype is reinforced by the fact that addiction professionals see only the people who see addiction professionals. Our society stigmatizes the hell out of addiction, and addiction treatment is notoriously punitive and inadequate. If youâre an addict and you do not absolutely need to seek this form of treatment, you donât. Because for the vast majority of people, addiction simply is not like that.
In fact, drug addiction is best described as a developmental disorder caused by trauma and untreated physical or emotional pain. In the classic ârat parkâ experiment used to uphold the classical addiction model, a rat in a cage self-injects cocaine until it dies, forsaking food, water, and sex. When you place that rat in a larger cage, with other rats and shit to do besides inject cocaine, the rats ignore the cocaine or use it sparingly. I could talk your ear off about all that and its implications but yeah. We have all been really fantastically lied to about addiction and drugs, and our approach to the problems these things do cause makes them worse. Read up on Carl Hart and Bruce K Alexander to learn more.
For those who are interested, there is a great book on this subject called Chasing the Scream: The First and Last Days of the War On Drugs by Johann Hari.Â
Dr Carl Hart has written extensively about this also and has lots of resources on his website (I donât have it handy but Google his name).
Iâve met people whoâve had lifelong addictions while never âhitting rock bottomâ - they have jobs, relationships, stable housing etc. Harm reduction has been shown to work far better than the abstinence model. We should be talking about supplying drug users (addicted or not) with clean injecting equipment, safe disposal and naloxone, not to mention mental health services (since thereâs a huge overlap between problematic drug use and mental illness).
there is not a single role chris pratt does that jack black couldnât do better
facts
Sapphic affection, you love to see it
We all love petting cats. This kid loves his cat to another degree mashallah!đđđ
We watch a little girl about my daughterâs age while her mom works. A real cute, sweet thing who only communicates by humming and smiling and waving. Precious beyond words and so, so gentle.
She has this odd quirk where if you tell her âno,â which has only happened about twice or three times in the month and a half weâve been watching her, she freezes and looks like youâve ripped her little heart out and stomped on it. We have since tried to avoid saying it because she looks so upset and scared.
Today we found out why and my heart is breaking.
When her mom dropped her off, the little girl saw our neighborâs potted plant on the doorstep. She went over and ripped a leaf off, because sheâs a child and doesnât know better. Her mom told her ânoâ and hit her hands. The girl immediately lost her smile, became very reserved, and didnât want to come in and play, where usually she bounds up the stairs to see her best friend (my daughter).
Later in the morning, I was watching as our little friend tried to take something out of my daughterâs hands, so I told her âno-noâ in a gentle voice, just as I do to my daughter when sheâs trying to take something. She jumped back and held her little hands, and looked absolutely terrified. I immediately knelt down to offer a hug and tell her sorry, but she flinched away from me and was scared to let me touch her. So I just talked to her soothingly and eventually put a hand on her arm and rubbed it softly, and she launched herself at my neck to hug me and demanded I hold her off-and-on throughout the rest of the time she was with us today.
This tiny child is afraid of getting her hands hit when she hears the word âno.â It doesnât leave bruises when her mom does it, it doesnât even leave visible redness or marks, but it has absolutely left a mark on this tiny babyâs mind.
How is a child supposed to know why theyâre not allowed to hit when you hit them? How is a child supposed to know why the person they go to for comfort is suddenly trying to make them uncomfortable and scared? How is fear and pain a teaching tool? And if itâs not about hurting or scaring them, why do you have to hit them at all? Because they donât like itâ and why donât they like it? Because their trust in you is being undermined, because theyâre afraid, because it hurts in their heart.
This little girl canât even talk, but she hears one word and instantly freezes up and feels terror because the hands that are supposed to help and comfort and hold her suddenly turn into something scary, and she doesnât understand why.
My husband and I had a good cry about it, but Iâm still just sad, and mad. That sweet little thing who beams and hums and giggles when she sees us in the mornings, who runs up to my daughter and gives her little bunny kisses, who takes my finger and leads me around the house just because she wants me to hang out with herâŚ
Donât hit kids. Spanking, swatting, whatever you want to call itâ a) itâs been shown to actually increase problem behaviors, and b) itâs wrong. Why do you have to put a hand on a child to teach them? If it hurts, thatâs wrong- we donât hurt people to get what we want. If it doesnât hurt, then what are you doing it for?
And I guarantee you it does hurt, even if itâs not physical. The look on that little girlâs face is going to haunt me for a long, long time.
Discipline is the goal- teaching, not punishing. And hitting, no matter how soft, doesnât teach. Rather, if it does, it teaches the wrong things.
thinking about how liberals claim the rest of us wonât settle for the lesser of two evils when so many of us were ready to settle for exactly that in the form of bernie sanders but by lesser of two evils they meant the same kind of evil but smiling politely and only whispering instead of screaming racist things
So Bernie is the same as Trump? I donât understand.
No, rather, Bernie was the lesser evil of the Democratic candidates, and a far lesser evil than Trump, but for socialists, he was still seen as a compromise. Bernie would have continued drone strikes and U.S. imperialism. He would not have returned the land to indigenous peoples. He would have kept capitalism intact, albeit a slightly friendlier capitalism. Again, to socialists, Bernie was the compromise, but so many liberals seem to think we were all hyped as all fuck about Bernie and only don't like Biden because we're sore losers or something. In reality, many of those now critiquing Biden were only erstwhile allies of the Democratic party in the hopes of receiving some minor concessions to actual socialist aims, but those hopes are now dashed, and many socialists see voting for Biden as a total concession to liberalism.
you ever realize how able bodied people just are not expected to do things that cause them excruciating physical pain? like theyâre just. not
if i shouldnât use my cane because i can sometimes technically walk without it, it would just hurt like a motherfucker then abled people should no longer be allowed to use potholders to take things out of the oven because i mean
well they could technically pick up a hot pan with their bare hands. it would just hurt like a motherfucker
*sees an abled person using potholders*
i just think itâs really sad that youâre giving up on yourself like that
if you use potholders how will you ever build up the calluses necessary to pick up scalding hot metal without burning yourself so severely? itâs like youâre not even trying to get better
I mean, my mother uses potholders, but sheâs in her 70s. Youâre just⌠too YOUNG to be resorting to potholders at your age.
If you start using potholders, your inability to hold hot metal will only get worse.
As a professional cook I was, and still am, able to pick most stuff up out of an oven without a pot holder. I might get blisters and maybe it will hurt, but usually it wonât
AMAZING! based on this one specific individualâs experiences i will now safely assume that itâs possible for anyone to overcome hand pain & leave potholders behind for good!!! as long as you want it bad enough, anything is possible!! make this story go viral so that all those self pitying losers who still use potholders know that thereâs no excuse
ââĄLIKE & SHARE IF YOU WERE INSPIRED!!!âĄâ
oh my gOD IM SO INSPIRED!!!
i hear so much bullshit from able bodied people and they need to see this
A lot of Nice Guys wonder why women reject them and instead chase after Bad Boys.
Itâs because the Bad Boy really isnât that bad, and the Nice Guy really isnât that nice.
The Bad Boy moves on when heâs rejected. He does not ask for a reason. He does not try to make her feel guilty. He does not say âyouâre ugly anywayâ in order to save his ego. He knows that not everyone is going to like him. Heâs more than happy to have women as friends.
The Nice Guy complains when heâs rejected. He wonât accept any reason other than âI have a boyfriend.â Even if she does have a boyfriend, heâll wait until the boyfriend does something wrong then expect her to dump her boyfriend and date the Nice Guy instead (a common theme of âromanticâ songs). He whines about women being stuck up b***hes who wonât give him a chance. He thinks heâs perfect for her because he thinks he knows her better than she knows herself. He complains about women having standards even though he has standards. He complains about the âfriend zoneâ. He expects a reward for every nice thing he does.
For women who are constantly worried about men harassing them, the Bad Boy is a hell of a lot safer than the Nice Guy. The Bad Boy who flirts with many women but makes sure itâs consensual, doesnât pretend he wants a commitment when he doesnât, and moves on without question when rejected is a hell of a lot less threatening than the Nice Guy who feels entitled to a womanâs affection.
Most abusive men are not Bad Boys. Most abusive men are Nice Guys who âturned intoâ assholes because they didnât get what they feel entitled to.
âThe Bad Boy who flirts with many women [âŚ] doesnât pretend he wants a commitment when he doesnât, [âŚ] a lot less threatening than the Nice Guy who feels entitled to a womanâs affection.
Most abusive men are NOT âBad Boysâ. Most abusive men are Nice Guys who [âŚ] didnât get what they feel entitled to.â
And therefore feel entitled to behave abusively.