[bisexualize]

[raylangivins]

my dealer: got some straight gas. this strain is called “daylight savings time” youll be zonked out of your gourd

Me: yeah whatever. i dont feel shit.

1 hour and 5 minutes later: dude I swear it’s only been 5 minutes

my friend the oven, pacing: the smart devices are lying to us

[shiny-rhydon]

yeah sure i'll reblog that

[helllnotes]

Ask me to walk on fucking water Malborn

[chewbacca]

SCARY MOVIE 2 (2001)  |  dir. Keenen Ivory Wayans

[battletoads]

[scenetorrents]

[ooppo]

Trump is dead this and Trump is dead that. The obvious answer for Trump's sudden disappearance is that Trump has gone into his very first heat and the Whitehouse is trying to cover up that he's an Omega

[greelin]

this is going to make me throw upp

[hyrude]

when bilbo first gave frodo this pearlescent bralette he was being shady because he thought the top would be wearing him. it's like giving your kid sister louboutins when she can't even walk in block heels.

so you know the girls were gagging here

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[beardedmrbean]

[globalmutt]

[bob-morley]

[gauntletqueen]

Does anyone have the fucking tiktok video of the overly enthusiastic rich bearded guy showing off his new hiking shoes in his Mansion and the Woods, but then another dude duets with it to make it look like he's escaping from being held prisoner please please

edit THANKS @smellslikebot

[treecitysessions]

[cherryfleischer-deactivated2026]

[whats-a-bear]

[himynameisemail]

[batbetbitbotbut]

Safety first!

[balaclava-trismegistus]

having erection is low key kinda sexual

[balaclava-trismegistus]

OH FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rockabillywife]

The full spectrum of human emotion