The Ball Is Rolling Up

Listen. The day I found gluten free dino chicken nuggets was probably the happiest day of my life. 26 | She/they Good morning! Hope you’re having a wonderful day! And if not, I hope it gets better soon! Not much to this blog. Mostly just reblogging things I find funny or interesting. Occasional rants or attempts at jokes. Feel free to talk if you’d like! I’m always down to make friends 😁 Header image taken by me

[boomer-mythology-destroyer]

[special-agent-dale-gooper]

[wrenchinator-central]

[fucxingcuties]

[shutyourmoustache]

[elvencantation]

[zoesupreme]

I have started following the journey of a German soccer fan in the US for the world cup

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

@laeffy the euros have found buc-ee's

[zoesupreme]

[mrlovenstein]

Secret Panel HERE 🏴‍☠️ patreon.com/mrlovenstein/posts/find-help-26712359

[mortalityplays]

last week I was deep in the trenches ploughing through work and mid-afternoon realised I'd neglected to open the blinds and the room was a little dim, so I got up to do that and discovered that a car had flipped onto its roof directly outside my flat and the entire street was closed and flooded with emergency service while they dragged someone out of the vehicle and packed them into an ambulance. so now every time I open the blinds I'm a little like the dog with the ham sandwich bush. what the fuck could it be today.

[stagbeetleboy]

It would be funny if we were introduced to a vast galaxy of alien life and the blue whale was still the largest animal ever discovered. Like that’s the biggest life has ever gotten. That would be fucked. The blue whale is just the craziest animals would get even with the introduction of a seemingly infinite number of new species. Would you be disappointed or celebrate the enormity of our homegrown big ass creature?

[brightlotusmoon]

[ancientson]

I know this is meant to be funny but it actually makes such a good point about how ADHD and executive dysfunction can impact people in really major ways, including financially

[replicated]

i'm not really into blondes but this is an objectively absurd connection to make

[peachfromcmbyn]

In order to be properly non-pedophilic you have to want to fuck somebody old but not with gray or white hair because that's too close to blonde which as we've established is the hair color of children. So ideally somebody old as fuck but bald. And obviously wanting to have sex with a man is misogynistic so it has to be a woman. And it can't be a white woman because that would be racist and it can't be a woman of color because that would be fetishistic, so ideally a woman with some unnatural skin color, oh let's say, purple. But it can't be an alien, because we don't know anything about alien life cycles so it could be an alien child or an alien that looks like a child. So it has to be an animal from Earth, but obviously one of human level intelligence that can communicate is otherwise that would be bestiality. So an old purple female animal that can speak English. I think the only creature you can be hot for is the Ant Queen from A Bug's Life.

[kholdseid]

[biomaterial]

new kind of guy dropped

[3liza]

he's unironically 100% correct and i will hear nothing against him

[demilypyro]

me and the gang when we're werebears and the moon is coming out: woahhhhh we're halfway bear. woah-ho! turning into bears!

[bontxt-deactivated20151125]

how do draw good

fill 14 sketch book

bad stuff is good stuff bc you made stuff

do you like sparkle???? draw sparkle

draw what make your heart do the smiley emote

member to drink lotsa agua or else bad time

d ont stress friend all is well

your art is hot like potato crisps

don’t let anyone piss on your good mood amigo

if they do

eat

them

[consultingcriminal-deactivated2]

this fucking post

i finally found it

in the name of the Lord

[headspace-hotel]

Seems legit

[headspace-hotel]

we all hear about kudzu being introduced as "erosion control" in the South but I don't think contemporary people understand on a gut level what that means

these are images from a 1930s pamphlet that endorsed kudzu, entitled "stop gullies: save your farm"

It was Bad.

[headspace-hotel]

Invasive plants need to be understood as part of a much larger cycle of incredible violence against the land.

[peat-moss-and-starlight]

For context: erosion on that scale occurred as a result of our clear-cutting entire states. The land east of the Mississippi used to be covered in old-growth forest to an extent that we literally can’t imagine anymore, because most of us have never seen a forest over 100 years old. It turns out if you remove all vegetation from a landscape, you end up with a bunch of loose soil ready to move downstream. A fast-growing plant that covers everything in dense vegetation sounds like salvation when you’re surrounded by 40-foot deep gullies that get wider with every rainstorm.

[seat-safety-switch]

Many of my friends love motorcycles, which are like cars but with fewer wheels. This makes them easier to store, I imagine, which appeals to me. Hoarding twice as many vehicles sounds great! Unfortunately, there are many problems with this deviant lifestyle, and it's not the ones that people will tell you.

If you ask the average uninitiated suburban voter, they'll express a level of fear when it comes to motorcycles. Oh no, they claim, those things will kill you instantly thirty million ways and they'll never find all of your body. That's not particularly relevant to me, mostly because I routinely drive cars with even less safety equipment than your average motorcycle. What is a concern? The lack of a trunk.

Friends, the trunk is one of the greatest inventions of all of humankind. To be able to put your shit in a box, lock it, and bring that shit with you across your travels? Delightful. Although many "touring" motorcycles have little boxes in which you can place your underwear, sidearms, and next-of-kin identification, space is still quite limited. You can't do what I do, which is leave a bunch of crap in the trunk that you're too lazy to bring into your house. Look back there. Yeah, that's a Commodore 128. It's the deluxe model. Won't even fit on a Goldwing.

To my surprise, when I brought this up to my biker-gang friends, I was rebuffed. Not only do larger touring bags exist, but certain ridiculous individuals have even developed a little trailer that you can tow behind your motorcycle. It's teeny-weeny, sure, but certainly bigger than the trunk in, say, a Fiat 500. And that's before we even get to sidecars.

The only problem here is that once you add one of these, suddenly the space advantage of the motorcycle disappears. You might as well just do what normal people do, and hoard between 35 and 71 old cars on your property. That said, I have recently found a couple motorcycles that I forgot I owned. They were in the trunk.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[nikoisme]

don't make this harder, please