Heaven's Edge @dmagedgoods - Tumblr Blog

If you like the stuff I write, you find my fanfictions

here on AO3. My OCs:

Salvadore - conceited nobleman, strategist and politician with high ambitions (Knight Commander in Pathfinder: Wotr): oc: salvadore

Eneas - manipulative sorcerer, street musician and schemer with the ability to control emotions: oc: eneas

Rowley - skilled assassin, troublemaker and solution finder who loves to provoke and to leave a mess (Tav in BG3): oc: rowley

Cian - haughty, suave sorcerer, hungry for power and knowledge, in his spare time writer and poet (Durge in BG3): oc: cian

Adrial - dandy noble, aasimar, illusion wizard with a dark secret: oc: adrial

relationships:

Daeran/Salvadore: knight and dae

Astarion/Rowley: danse macabre

Raphael/Cian: faustian bargains

#my writing #dmagedramblings

hollowboobtheory

imagine hiring an assassin and they talk to you in a customer service voice

teaboot

"Hello, how can I help you today? Wonderful, can I get a first and last name? And how would I spell that? Awesome. And would you happen to have an address for this individual? And place of work? Fantastic.

Now, I'm going to give you a number, and I'm going to ask that you send in a photo of your target alongside any additional information you may have- family members, security, combat training, medical conditions, just anything you can think of that might be helpful.

Wonderful, you are all good. All we need now is a piece of government-issued ID, for insurance purposes, and a location for payment pickup. We accept cash, gold, processed uranium, and etransfer.

I'm sorry, we don't take american express.

Good, okay, so it looks like we are all set- when the job is complete, you will be notified VIA discreet codeword that a stranger will whisper to you on a crowded street.

We do not issue receipts, but if you'd like, I can arrange for a specific breed of tropical flower to be sent to your home address. Our associates will be able to validate it should the need arises.

And is that everything you were looking for today? Great! Thank you for coming to us. Have a nice day!"

teaboot

Alternatively,

"I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid the Pope is a high-status target that is beyond our area of service.

Yes, I- no, I'm sorry, I'm not able to do that for you.

Okay. Okay. Yes, I understand.

Sir, if you're going to use that sort of language, you should know that our HR department does operate in a hands-on capacity.

Wonderful. You take care."

nebulousboundsfloof

They create a perfectly normal call cemter staffed by decidedly amoral college students and paying them at least 4x minimum wage.

hollowboobtheory

hiring manager: you’re not concerned about the ah, services we offer?

a college student who has eaten ramen twice a day for the past year: for $25/hour i’ll pull the trigger myself

talvin-muircastle

Look, the difference between Assassins and Customer Service is that Assassins are paid a lot of money to kill people and Customer Service isn’t being paid nearly enough not to.

fakeharmless

nemfrog

The Journal of arachnology. Summer 1990. Cover art.

#art

ilynpilled

i like when fiction treats love as a more complicated force and not something that is inherently pure, redemptive, or salvific. portray it as flawed and complex as any other human impulse. give me love as prejudice, love as possessive stasis, love as addiction, love as blindness, etc.