If You Wanna Know

She/her | 22 | I like cats

[strawberry-witch-blog]

Trying to get your vampire husband to be less imposing (but that's part of his charm)

**Please don't repost or edit my artwork**

[circespigfarm]

[crittizen]

The look on her face when she realizes

[aegri-somnia-vana]

Here’s what they said if you didn’t understand-

Interviewer: What do you think about starting an initiative on campus here at UK, to be more inclusive to women who have penises? So we can put urinals in the womens restroom for them.

Student: Sounds fantastic.

Interviewer: Oh, does it?

Student: Yeah.

Interviewer: What about- Let’s take it one step closer, y'know more- for inclusivity here on campus, but free tampons and pads in the mens restroom for men who have periods?

Student: Sounds great.

Interviewer: Ok- You dont see anything wrong with those statements?

Student: No.

Interviewer: What men do you know with periods?

Student: I generally use- ones like in Willy T* have pads, I use them pretty often.

*(Willy T is the college nickname for their library I’ve heard.)

[lost-clause]

I attend this school and I can confirm 2 things. Yes, our big library is indeed called Willy T AND the day that this stank bitch came to campus everyone was losing their MINDS and kept walking by in hopes of getting chosen to call her out. Immaculate.

[iclimbtreestofeelalive]

i. am on the floor. wheezing. the moment she realizes that not only is she talking to a trans man,, but that SHE COULDN’T CLOCK HIM,, this is high art and i want it written in Big Wedge sharpie on my wall

[mina-ahavi]

[voidcenturyscholar-deactivated2]

Post canon Toph who doesn’t want to go back to her shitty parents so she just decides to stay in the Fire Nation and bum off Zuko’s hospitality.

Zuko’s like no, yeah, I totally get it, and just makes her one of his advisors. At first it’s just so she has a good excuse to stay but after the first meeting Toph storms out shouting about how EVERYONE was lying why would you even need to lie about what kind of tea you want??

Zuko: I mean they’re politicians.....but also who, and when, and in what way

They make a subtle Morse code system so Toph can warn him when someone is lying to him without tipping anyone off that she can sense lies.

Zuko gets a reputation for somehow being both extremely socially inept and yet somehow disgustingly perceptive?? You can’t get ANYTHING by him???

[romancedawning-deactivated20210]

#my lord what EXACTLY is ms Beifongs role in these meetings #a nervous nobleman asks after the third time she interrupts them with stupid commentary #zuko with perfect deadpan: she’s my scribe

You CAN’T leave that in the tags

[brattylikestoeat]

[sp-acecreature]

B U R G E R

[thediscossessed]

Yes, his smiling face is very disconcerting, but is no one going to talk about the fucking slapping sounds

[dunsparceus]

@donesparce

[cipheramnesia]

This is what the ideal man looks like.

[cipheramnesia]

He cooks, he's friendly, and he is happy to share. Look at this. He is showing you the delicious food he cooked, he wants you to enjoy. What a delightful person!

[maruxee]

this is what peak performance looks like. you may not like it, but it's the truth

[allthelxves]

“The friend of the last survivor Zombie.zip” 

[temporalkingdom]

Who is your dad, now?

[temporalkingdom]

Who is your dad, now?

[realrandomposts-deactivated2021]

I’ve seen this 5 times in a span of 2 hours and I’m still laughing

[toastbutteregg]

[lokiedokiee]

It’s midnight and I’m trying to be quiet bc I can’t stop laughing at this post. It’s been about ten minutes now. Send help.

[iconiczuko]

zuko got a redemption arc because he worked food service. dealing with Customers changed that bastard.

[cillianmurphy]

I AM ABSOLUTELY LOSING MY MIND AFTER READING THIS PLEASE READ IT

[cillianmurphy]

READ PART TWO AND THREE BELOW !!!!!

[thefaultinourchickennuggets]

there is a VERY chaotic Cupid running around this village

[arrghigiveup]

OH NO MY HEART :’)

[link to post]

[ampervadasz]

[zeldaspeaks]

[kvothe-kingkiller]

what a fucking power move

[dlartistanon]

Slush Puppies!

[jinsbts]

he’s stunning

[racingbarakarts]

I used to have geese so here’s a tip for everyone:

If a goose is attacking you, don’t run. No matter what, stand your ground. They can fly but when they’re mad, they don’t usually try to fly. Hold your hands in front of you, ready to grasp. When the goose gets close, grab it by the neck bit closest to the head and squeeze. Not tight enough to choke the goose, but tight enough so they can’t break free. You can hold them until they calm down or just do the next step right away. The next step is literally just to chuck them as far as possible and run for your life. It makes the goose know you’re in charge and you have a better chance of getting away. Trust me I’ve done this so many times that I’ve lost count

[myblogisnotinteresting]

I can’t tell if this is a shitpost or actual advice. But I do know geese are the fucking worst.

[racingbarakarts]

Actual advice! Just yeet a goose

[61below]

Yeet the geese

[racingbarakarts]

I’ve been reading the replies to this so here’s an update!

DO NOT KICK A GOOSE. Geese are very important for nature as they maintain insect populations and they help pick weeds that try to kill useful plants! Geese are good, they’re just grumpy. Never kick one because you could fatally injure them. They do not have the bone structure to survive a strong kick.

I had to deal with this a lot because my family bred geese. Geese are not happy about their eggs being taken so after you take one, they remember for their whole lives. We had a farm, we did what we had to do in order to survive. We loved our geese and our geese loved us, just not when we were taking their babies.

Do not kill Geese just because they’re mean. Please

Yes you could crawl towards them, but that only works if it’s one goose. If it’s more than one attacking you, you can yeet them as they get close.

This post was about white geese, which is what we bred, but you can do this for Canadian geese too! Because attacking a Canadian goose can get you a fine and even jail time, this is a much nicer approach to being attacked by a goose.

Also for some reason a lot of replies are saying this can break a goose’s neck???? It can’t??? Don’t spread lies. Geese are built to be picked up by the neck and they have tons of muscles in their necks to support being thrown. This is how they fight each other. It doesn’t hurt them. Just stuns them.

DO NOT DO THIS TO SWANS!!!!!!! SWANS ARE EVIL IF YOU ARE BEING ATTACKED BY A SWAN JUST ACCEPT YOUR DEATH. THEY WILL NOT BE STUNNED. THEY WILL NOT FORGET. THEY WILL FOLLOW YOU HOME AND MURDER YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. SWANS ARE DEMONS

[askfordoodles]

Actually, I have picked up a swan by just, slotting in under my arm; once their wings are held in place they just sorta hiss a bit and accept their fate. It’s how wildlife centres and rspca deal with them. They just use swan-bags, I’M NOT kidding, that completely neutralizes them. LOOK AT ALL THESE DEMONIC BULLIES BEING DEFEATED BY BEING CHIHUAHUA-HANDBBAGGED.

In fairness, in MY CASE, this was a juvenile male, but old enough that the dad had evicted it from the lake. He was in my way, hissing and refusing to move; and if you hiss at me, that’s a challenge, baby!

[kedreeva]

Most birds will accept their date once you have their wings (geese will, in my experience, chill once you have them under an arm too, I pick them up like that). They transport peafowl in sacks like that too:

[magellan-88]

This post is a journey

[funeral-clown]

bird straitjackets