under new management

they/them, door.

[randumbkatt]

we the operas brothers let us sing you a song

[louisegluckpdf]

got my lab results back turns out i’m full of rage because i am full of grief

[abigail]

unfortunately i do think i am in fact doomed forever but at least there’s movies and music and idk probably some other things too

[whyenn-reader]

im doing good! you know. besides the underlying feeling that I'm fundamentally incapable of fitting in in a society. besides that i'm chillin

[machinot]

when u look at 2017 and think “oh that’s only like 3 years ago” and it’s actually 12,000 years ago and everything is gone and everyone you know has been reduced to ash and the world is completely different

[depsidase]

[spidersinmysoup]

"You snooze you lose" anti nap propaganda, changing it to "you snooze yaaaaayyyyyy yippeeeee"

[demilypyro]

vampires are so full of shit. "oh the human race is beneath us, you're just livestock to us" I don't think you know what livestock is. do you feed us? care for us? protect us from predators? no. you just slink around dark alleys and ambush people. that's not what a higher being does. that's a bottom feeder. a parasite. karate punches your head off

[mushroominaforest]

Shout out to the doctor who responded with complete sincerity when I (on anesthesia) uttered the phrase “chat are we cooked” in her medical professional vicinity. You’re such a real one for that fr fr

[zinjanthropusboisei]

There are some specific-ass subreddits and cookiecutters in this world

[ryanphantom]

discord, do not disturb has been on for like eight years straight. i am not available.

[rabbiteclair]

a guy shoots at me with a sniper rifle and I catch the bullet in my teeth and eat it, but he saw that coming and put poison in the bullet, but I saw that coming and drank an antidote ahead of time, but all those weird chemicals still give me a really bad kidney stone a few days later and I pass out from pain and crash my car into, by pure coincidence, the sniper

[mushroominaforest]

Shout out to the doctor who responded with complete sincerity when I (on anesthesia) uttered the phrase “chat are we cooked” in her medical professional vicinity. You’re such a real one for that fr fr

[t4tstarvingdog]

“start your free trial now” what if i told u i am already experiencing trials. and the cost is more than i can bear

[mephistopheles]

anti-therapy speak. your reactions ARENT valid. you DO owe them an explanation. you ARE just being lazy. your ‘self-care’ talk IS just an excuse. your parent ISN’T a narcissist. you DO need to work harder. you ARE overreacting. you ARE being insane

[flagellant]

I’ve trained my dogs to expect their dental treats when I offer them “the body of Christ”. Is this heresy or blasphemy?

A rare occasion where it's both! Animals can't receive communion/experience the sacraments because they have no souls. Additionally, I am going to safely assume you aren't a priest, so you aren't allowed to perform transubstantiation. Additionally, the Eucharist cannot be made of dental treats. Finally this whole thing is making a huge mockery of one of the single most sacred acts in Catholicism. Well done!

[pearlsasinger-deactivated202602]

his dark materials will literally always work bc every small child wants an animal companion that loves you most and goes on adventures with you and every adult wants an animal companion that can shoulder some of life’s immense psychologically damage for you. and you can pet it