We Be Spiraling @double-bi-gent - Tumblr Blog

Baby chameleons help eliminate fruit flies

(via)

this is a cute video but I cannot emphasize enough that only one of them is helping. the goofball climbing the electrical cable deserves no credit

aflo

he’s going after the third fly

crabussy

you ask me what the time is and I glance at my wrist but instead of a wristwatch there’s a compass duct taped to my wrist and I immediately turn and walk north never to be seen again

parkchanwoohoo

I finished putting together the Irish-American heritage month display and Jesus CHRIST there are so few books about Ireland in our collection?? Once more, I must say:

parkchanwoohoo

Oh and for the people who asked me last time what "a lot of stuff" entails

parkchanwoohoo

How the FUCK did I forget this

formulakimmich-deactivated20241

me and my besties on our way to do a barbie and oppenheimer double feature on july 21

beaky-peartree

the only DB Cooper theories i accept:

he died cuz he was an idiot who jumped out of a fucking plane during a rain storm in the middle of the night

it’s tommy wiseau

xenosagaepisodeone

there’s no proof he hit the ground so he could still fall on us at any time

a-daks

he went up

manuciruja

Cinematic parallels👌

ponyboyfaceshopping

feeling like the health inspector

ponyboyfaceshopping

homunculus-argument

A sleight-of-hand magician routine that's also a stand-up comedy set about ADHD. Like I'm just there complaining about how I always lose or forget stuff, I change subject as I lose your track of thought, then suddenly remember that I was holding a fan in my hand and -

Where the FUCK did it go??

I ask the audience if they saw where it went. Not in my sleeve, there's just a handkerchief there. Nothing in my pockets. FUck, I don't even have any pockets. No, wait, was it in the - [a dove emerges from an improbable place] aw fuck I forgot to return that to the vet.

Now distracted by tugging a comical length of handkerchiefs out of my sleeve, I'll start telling the story of why, exactly, I was borrowing a pigeon from a vet in the first place. The story, which is lengthy, still doesn't go on as long as the string of handkerchiefs.

pyromaniac-fairy-of-water

I'd pay to see this

tiktoks-for-dead-pope

figural

straightboyfriend

bogleech

This is a the funniest fucking post I have seen in a year because first the spelling and backstory makes you think he got a role as one of the beatles, and then after the preposterous reveal she says that isnt actually a problem, and I don't think anything more could be funnier than the actual post cutting it off as she makes it all about the couch. Comedy writers please study this.

wizard-email

Walter White Woman

wizard-email

it is Thursday

stonedasamartyr

Walter white woman wednesday its thursday thursday

catchymemes

lady-byleth

what, and I cannot stress this enough, the fuck

spicymayonegg

fuck whatever fake-ass feral aesthetic you guys are cultivating, this guy has it on lock

jaslrah

Don’t forget about this one.

perfectlygenericblog

It gets weirder…

orchidvioletindigo

It should 100% be illegal for companies to make you give them your payment information when you sign up for a free trial version of their product. It is not necessary and there is no good fucking reason for them to do it. It’s blatantly just so they can steal forgetful customers’ money.

saint-batrick

oh hey, thanks for reminding me to cancel a free trial i had going on.

tattooedzombigirl

Reblog to save an unnecessary charge cause it also reminded me to cancel a trial lol

clownjpg

the funniest and best thing i’ve learned while doing research for this shakespeare project is that in the late 19th century, there was this group called the american acclimatization society and their thing was bringing european plants and animals to the u.s. so one member was this guy named eugene schieffelin and he was like obsessed with shakespeare, so he went, “hey, wouldn’t it be cool if we tracked down EVERY SPECIES OF BIRD SHAKESPEARE EVER MENTIONED and brought them ALL to America” so he rounded up like a hundred European starlings and released them in central park, and now there are upwards of 200 million starlings in North America and they cause around $1 billion worth of damage to crops every year, all because shakespeare mentioned them exactly ONCE in Henry IV part 1