I think what made me the happiest about the Kendrick v Drake beef was that for a moment there, we were all listening to rap as rap is meant to be listened to. Active listening, media comprehension, focused, fun, and all to the sound of the spilled blood of a man's career being curb stomped. Generational experience. 10/10 would experience for the first time again.
be skeptical of anything that encourages you to be too self-congratulatory about how much smarter your side is than your opponents’. liberals were also duped into contributing to the success of this scam and others like it
See this is why when we say "do not feed the trolls," what we mean is DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS.
No engagement. NONE. Telling them how stupid and terrible and wrong they are is STILL ENGAGEMENT. You are still promoting their content and it doesn't matter if it's negative or positive attention.
If you want to refute some of their claims, screenshot and block the username (this discourages others from seeking out the original post and engaging with it— it doesnt make it impossible obviously but people are often lazy and it making it slightly more difficult to find the original post will discourage most people).
This is also a good habit for engaging with people who may just be regular jerks, not out and out trolls. You want to complain or refute but necessarily encourage a massive pile on that gets completely out of hand.
"didn't they already do this with—" no. put them in a slasher film. put them in a BLOODBATH. put this van full of weirdoes in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre scenario i have FAITH in them
not Saw specifically but a slasher with a legit body count. Summer camp slashers are overplayed but I think it really works because it's the type of thing the Scooby gang WOULD get caught up in.
like some of the counselors didn't show up (got got) so the head counselor calls his younger cousin to see if him and his friends can fill in last minute. They show up and they're a bunch of nerds, one of them even has an anxiety dog, and they don't have a big role at first. It seems like the movie is setting them up as cannon fodder.
and then the deaths start and suddenly the nerds are locked the fuck in. The little one with the glasses actually fixed the phone line and is taking stock of all their supplies in case the vehicles go out. The counselor's cousin who seemed like a himbo has set up a perimeter and made makeshift alarms for all the doors and windows, knows all the entry points. The anxious one and his dog are keeping the mood up with the snacks and activities that were supposed to be for the kids, making sure nobody panics and starts making dumb decisions. Somebody tried to grab the redhead and she flipped him over and had him zip-tied before anybody noticed. Weren't they a D&D group or something? What is happening???
cw: tipsy bkg, head (m) (ikr how crazy), fluff, smut, established relationship. probably typos. i’ll add borders later.
“where…,” there’s a soft slam of your front door, keys being thrown on the table and boots being kicked off. a light stumble with a swear tacked on at the end. “where are you?”
“bedroom!” you call, sitting on your bed to pull up your large pyjama t-shirt to the tops of your thighs and opening your tub of vanilla body cream.
your response gets an incoherent mumble across your flat as there’s more shuffling down your hallway. a jacket being tugged off and… something else?
bakugou katsuki’s head pops through the doorway first. droopy eyes, wrinkled black t-shirt (he did leave here with a jumper so you wonder where that is) and no trousers (jumper is probably where the trousers are).
“did you lose your clothes outside?” you laugh as strong thick legs wade their way towards you.
he moves like a zombie with his fluffy messy hair, slow walk with his arms out to you.
the six foot four pro hero shakes his head at you sloppily, towering over your frame for a second before dropping to his knees between your legs. he rests all his body weight on you, exhausted.
you watch him enamoured, like he’s a dog just trying to show he wants some attention. he circles his arms around your waist and his head drops on your lap, snuggling into you tightly.
“took them off by the door. you don’t like my jeans on your bed.” he breathes, closing his eyes, “you smell so fuckin’ good.”
you opt to creaming your arms instead.
“did you have fun tonight then?” you offer, dipping your fingers into the cold cream and slathering it over your arms. bakugou holds you despite your movement, pecking the bare skin of your thigh.
the man grunts, a slow lift and quick drop of his shoulders in a shrug.
“sparky is investin’ in a stupid cocktail company. he wanted us to try them all,” he sounds disgusted by it, “they were all disgustin’.”
you’ve got a tipsy katsuki tonight. you smile down at him, pushing his hair off his forehead to get a proper look at his face. bakugou looks up at you, innocent and pitiful but you know he’s anything but.
“how many did you have?”
“three?”
“you little lightweight.”
he opens his mouth to push his top row of teeth into your thigh. you splutter when it tickles, shoving his head off you. together you eye the imprint of his teeth as he sits back on his ass on the floor. just in his underwear and a tshirt.
“they were high percentage cans. too goddamn high,” he huffs, eyes flickering over your body, “you just showered.”
you nod, resting back on your arms behind your body. you’ve finished moisturising, you’ve done your skincare and you’re practically ready to roll into bed.
but it’s not often you get a drunk or tipsy bakugou. he hates drinking, was one of the first things he mentioned when he met you because he heard it was a dealbreaker for some. it definitely wasn’t for you, especially when he said he just hates how slow and out of control it made him feel.
“you’re like an ‘88 first edition gold rimmed mint all might winter suit card,” he rambles, standing up to push you back into the bed with all your confusion.
“what?” it’s times like these when you remember you’re dating a nerd.
he grabs your hips to push you up the bed so he’s got enough space to seat his body between your legs and rest his forearms by your head. you open your legs wider, letting his head sink into the crook of your neck.
you feel him inhale again as if he’s a wolf scenting you.
“it’s the best card you can get, rare as hell. less than twenty were made and it’s out of the old card material before that company went out of production,” you circle your arms around his shoulders, listening. bakugou, speaks into your neck, kissing after every couple words. “i’ve got one of the cards. ‘ts in my office.”
you lock your legs behind his back.
“okay…” you drawl, brushing your fingers through his hair looking up at your ceiling with a frown, “now what’s that to do with me?”
bakugou freezes, resting on his forearms to look at you properly. you make his heart ache, a sharp pang in his chest and he grunts. your face has a glossy shine to it, the t-shirt you’re wearing (which is one of his) is fresh out the dryer with that cotton smell and you’re holding him just as tight as he’s holding you.
he doesn’t realise he’s looking at you like he’s confused that you’re confused.
“comin’ in here was like openin’ a rare pack,” he sniffs and when you’re still frowning he continues, “you ready for bed after a shower is my favourite you. seein’ you is the same feelin’ as when i got that card.”
it’s soppy and silly.
“and that card is so rare and so are you. i have you and i’ve got that card.”
you nod slowly in understanding and a small smile lands on bakugou’s cheeks.
“you’re saying you love me a lot,” you reply, pouting your lips out for a kiss which he quickly responds to.
“i’m sayin’ more than that baby,” he whines but it only makes you laugh, “im sayin’ you’re rare and only i get to see you like this and i’m the fuckin’ luckiest motherfucker in the world.”
“you’re a soppy nerd when you’re drunk, katsuki,” you slap your hand over his mouth before he can reply, “but that’s really cute. i love you too.”
“‘m bein’ romantic. that card sells for thousands,” he whispers when he presses his lips against yours again but this time he opens his mouth and tilts his head. you copy, letting his tongue swirl with yours. minty fresh toothpaste with maybe a pina colada from him at the back. your body heats when the kiss gets messier, a moan releasing from the back of bakugou’s throat. when your legs tighten around him, that’s when he gives in, letting the full weight of his hips rest between your legs.
you inhale when you feel him, hard and heavy, both covered by your underwear.
“why were you hiding from me?” you say as he runs his lips down your jaw. you’re reactive now, body jolting on its own, sighing softly from his thickness resting on your ass cheeks to your clit.
“‘t’s fine if you don’t wanna fuck. you’re goin’ to bed.”
“you can’t call me the best pokémon card ever and expect me to not want you,” you laugh to yourself and bakugou rolls his eyes.
“stop pissin’ me off. wasn’t talkin’ about fuckin’ pokémon,” he curses but he can’t help but kiss you again, right on your smile with your arms tangled around his neck.
though you’re clearly pressing him into you, lifting your hips to feel him.
bakugou’s completely aware of how much bigger he is than you. in size, in height, in power and yeah, even his cock. it’s because of all those factors, why he prefers for you to initiate, to stop him feeling like a raging beast pulling a princess from her tower.
he can’t get his hands off you, now sneaking up your t-shirt to feel your hips, then your waist and your soft breasts. you’re smooth, a layer of that cream you just put on. good enough to eat with that vanilla smell.
“‘ki,” you breathe and he jolts his head up, “what do you want from me?”
bakugou wouldn’t say he’s a horny drunk. well he’s hardly ever drunk for one so he wouldn’t say he’s an anything drunk since he doesn’t have enough data. but you came up in his mind more than usual while he was drinking with the boys and then his walk home. and he just said, this is his favourite you, after a shower and ready for bed. his rare all might card.
“don’t ask me that,” he grunts, but he starts grinding down into you without meaning to. you react like a flicker of a flame, soft moans from your throat. “what d’you want me to do?”
“why’re you so stubborn?” you arch your back and bakugou’s greedy hands pull your top up to under your neck. your whole body exposed to him, minus your tiny little underwear bottoms.
“‘cause i’m the one that came in here drunk and all over you.” but he’s speaking to your body like you’re a meal he needs to get his hands on yesterday. “fuck. fuck, you’re so beautiful.”
“take your clothes off,” if you have to be in charge here, so be it.
your boyfriend listens, digging his knees into the mattress as he grabs the fabric at the back of his neck and yanks it over his head. you hum in appreciation, drifting your fingertips over his toned muscled chest. you point to his underwear.
“those too. off.”
bakugou inhales sharply but listens, pulling the tight fabric down his legs and your mouth practically waters when his appendage slaps against his chest. his cock is right in your face as you lay back.
“it’s up to you, baby. don’t wanna pressure you,” he warns, cupping his heavy balls for some release.
you know for a fact your underwear is stained through, especially when he throws his head back with a sweet curse.
“i know, i know. you’re so handsome, katsuki,” that gets him looking back at you. your face, then your tits, then back at you.
“what?”
“you’re so gorgeous. i’m lucky to have you too.”
“fuck,” he can’t stop swearing, taking hold of the base of his cock and squeezing. “i don’t think i can fuck you, i’ll come as soon as i’m inside.”
it’s honest and a little cute, a smile blooming on your face. you take the pause to pull off your t-shirt, throwing it off the bed.
“that’s okay—,”
“‘t’s not. ‘m not usin’ you like that.” he shakes his head sharply, enough to know you can’t change his mind on it.
“what if i want your dick in my mouth?” and you show him how as you sit up on your bed and he still rests on his shins. you’re at the right height to slide it in your mouth.
you press a kiss to his cockhead, licking up all the pre and pressing your cheek his length. “‘ki?”
you give him these round, shiny innocent eyes that hold the stars. bakugou feels as if he can’t hold a single thought in his head.
“you just cleaned up, ‘m all dirty—,”
“katsuki, let me.” you push and he twitches against your cheek, “i really want to.”
it’s not often you give him head compared to how often he gives you head. bakugou is never one to ask for it and you rarely want to give it even though he always asks to be between your legs. you asking to suck him off is another rare card, a fucking ‘99 gold rimmed—
“okay, baby,” he murmurs, moving all your hair out of your face and behind your shoulders.
“don’t touch my head,” you warn and bakugou nods his head rapidly, adjusting his hand to your cheek.
he’s on edge, holding his breath as you, his perfect, beautiful fucking girlfriend holds his cock with a single fist. then you hold the rest with your other hand, pointing it to your lips.
“i’m gonna come quickly. i already fuckin’ know i am—,”
“that’s fine, ‘ki honey,” you soothe, “just tap me when you think you are.” you lick around his sensitive tip with your tongue then you swallow as if you’re giving him a taste test. “not bad,” you whisper to yourself.
then you get started. removing one hand to sink yourself onto his cock, just as far as you can go without choking. when his tip his hits the tightness at the back of your throat where saliva has gathered, bakugou groans, holds the underside of your jaw.
“sorry, fuck, sorry baby,” he grunts every few seconds, apologising for simply being a man aroused.
you bob your head, swirling your tongue around what you can and pressing your thighs tightly together.
you’ve never been a fan of giving head but once in a while the want bursts through you, the power of having him under your command. this big groaning man falling apart because of you.
and katsuki is always a good listener. careful with you. makes sure not to buck his hips and you can tell he wants to because he bites down on his bottom lip. he doesn’t stop with the noise and he never pushes your head down.
“so fuckin’ good,” he whines, throwing his head back. you sharply suck, your hand at the base of his cock squeezing tightly. his moan is crumbled, choked on every sound trying to escape, “tryna kill me? babygirl.”
you pull off him for a second, stroking him in the meantime as you wipe your nose. you’re just about to wipe your eyes when bakugou swipes his thumbs under them both.
“you’re my beautiful girl.”
your moment of control falters a little, as you become focused on one aim and one aim only. your boyfriend’s pleasure and that’s all.
“kiss?”
he ducks down, hand on your chin as he stuffs his tongue in your mouth. he takes control of the kiss, like he’s giving you mid sex aftercare, making sure you’re okay because you had his cock in your mouth for a few minutes.
“doin’ so well, baby.” he speaks into your mouth, nibbling on your bottom lip before letting it snap into place.
that’s enough, pushing him off you so you can take his cock back.
you’re faster now, less careful about being comfortable, especially when you’re able to sneak your fingers beneath your panties to press onto your clit.
your lips and cheeks suction around him, tongue flat on his underside. bakugou’s eyes widen, staring down at you. “holy fuckin—,”
his hand cups the nape of your neck though he doesn’t move you.
“shit, any more and i’m gonna come,” his deep grumbling voice gets pitchy, unable to keep levelled, “i really… oh shit baby.”
you place your hands on his hips to help guide your head. it’s loud, the sound of your spit and the friction of him. your small whines every time you rub sweetly on yourself and bakugou, his grunts take up the whole room.
he taps your shoulder lightly, “i’m gonna now. i’m fuckin—,”
you slow down as he does, ropes of the stuff pouring down your throat. you let it all happen, laying a palm flat on his chest as the man above you grunts your name like he’s cursing you to damnation. he definitely isn’t.
when he’s done he slides out of your mouth and you hop up to your bathroom to spit.
when you return only a few seconds later, bakugou is laying back on your bed with his arms open. two thick biceps wrap you up in a cuddle.
“i haven’t forgotten about you. lemme see your panties.”
with your cheek pressed against his pectorals, you playfully roll your eyes.
“how do you want me to show you?” you say, cheek smushed.
“sit on my face? or you lay back and i eat you?” he looks funny from this angle, lifting his head to look down at you. cheeks flushed and heartbeat still racing to come down.
“i’ll sit on you.” you begin to sit up but pause, hitting his shoulder, “don’t look so happy!”
bakugou adjusts his body, hands finding your waist as you shuffle up. his smile could light up a city, “i’m lookin’ like you just accepted my offer to sit on my face. what’s with you tonight?”
you pout, sitting on his upper chest, “what’s that supposed to mean?”
“you don’t usually ask to suck me off. you usually say no to sittin’ on my face. today’s my lucky fuckin’ day.”
it’s true, you always moan it’s too intimate but letting him eat you any other way.
you shrug softly, pulling off your underwear and throwing it in his face. bakugou’s a dog with a ball, grabbing the fabric and stuffing it under his nose.
He was complaining about Orc x human porn being unrealistic because no human could just take an orc as easily as it seems in porn. You disagreed, adamant that it couldn't be that hard and you could do it if you really wanted to.
Now you find yourself pants-less, on his lap as he barely fits two fingers in your soaked cunt.
Your breaths come in ragged moans, barely louder than the lewd squelch of his middle and ring finger pumping you slowly, deliberately.
You felt so full but you weren't nearly ready to give up and you craved so much more, you wanted what those actresses In the pornos got.
"I'm ready. I can take it."
"Are you joking? You can barely handle two fingers."
You almost cry actual tears. He’s not even trying to tease you, he’s just being completely straight forward and that's even worse. He pumps his fingers slowly like he's actually trying to evaluate how well you could take him, carefully considering if the give and stretch of your walls is enough for his cock.
You tip your head back onto his chest and groan when the pads of his fingers brush that fleshy spot inside you.
"You're going slow on purpose. You're trying to tire me out."
He smacks his teeth, zeroing in on that exact spot that made you clench just right.
"I have to go slow or it'll hurt."
He curls his fingers and you scream into his shirt. You lose it and reach for his pants, almost getting his zipper down before being wrestled onto your back.
One hand holds your hands to your chest while you barely struggle and the other pumps knuckle deep inside you at a now punishing pace. Just when you feel you're at your limit, he slides a third thick finger inside, forcing you to clench down harder around the delicious stretch.
"Stoo much, istoo much, It's too much!"
You voice just gets louder and louder as you reach you climax when his thumb just barely brushes against your neglected clit. You clench and writhe under his weight, heaving with exhaustion while he's barely broken a sweat.
He slows his thrusts to a stop, letting you ride it out on his fingers before slipping them out and giving them a long lick. He meets your half-lid eyes, watching your parted lips puff out air, your chest rising and falling.
He then slips his three slicked fingers past your lips, as far as they can go until you start gagging. He huffs in clear amusement when you can't even take his fingers down your throat all the way.
quarterly reminder that if i reblog something ai-generated it is 110% and always an accident and for the love of god please tell me so i can delete it from my blog
Mmmm a royal family of werewolves, the country is a constitutional monarchy, but the royal family still holds sway over banks and such.
You as a diplomatic envoy, visit and stay in a small guest house on the royal grounds, not expecting to find the oldest of the royal children, a werewolf with deep reddish brown fur and nearly three decades of life experience, royal training, and graces taught to him, kneeling on the bed you'd been sleeping in humping against the pillow you used.
Telling him not to stop on your behalf, looking him over as you move closer.
Ignoring the whimper he lets out and settling into place on the bed, pulling the handkerchief you've been using to dab at sweat from the different climate, and shoving it into his face. Watching as he shudders and whines again, hips starting to move, soft yellow eyes watching you as he fucks himself against the pillow.
Kicking off your shoes from the day as you settle more on the bed, shifting so that you are sitting in front of him, watching more intentionally as he holds the handkerchief to his face on his own, whole body shaking as he seems to be stopping himself from cumming.
Just an older, unmarried, werewolf prince with a massive crush on one of the visiting diplomats. He's humping your pillow, stealing your handkerchiefs or laundry when you're at the palace, just desperate to get a solid hit of the scent he's enamored with.
and to the children in the notes saying we need this fucking baby talk to get around censorship online; there's been no credible evidence that any site other that YouTube (which will only demonetize your video, ftr) will actually censor or hide content that include words like rape, pedophile, gun, terrorist, etc. etc. and even if we take as a given they were (which, again, they are not), do not fucking comply in advance, you absolute fucking coward. and ESPECIALLY do not comply by altering your real life fucking vocabulary. don't let the technocrats dictate what words you say holy fucking shit dude!!!!!!!!!!!!
yandere!prince who's 3 months way from becoming king, the citizens and palace have already begun preparing for his coronation.
yandere!prince whos more terrifying than his father, nobles bow before him like GOD, his dark violet eyes gleaming with power.
yandere!prince who's favorite word is obedience, so it's no surprise when you're accepted as his personal maid he revels in your compliance.
"[Name], stand. Now." You're in his chambers holding a bowl of grapes. (he insists you feed him)
you stand.
"spin." you spin.
"lift up your skirt." you blush, giving him an almost disgraced face. as his personal maid, you were treated better but he'd never been perverted. you should have known better.
you move to set the bowl of grapes down anyways, you'd rather be humiliated for a moment then disobey and be forced to the torture many servants were subjected to. it wouldn't be so bad anyways, you had a petticoat under and would only lift the first layer.
the prince moved before you could, a pleasant smile taking up his brown cheeks, "God you really are perfect. I was joking, m'lady." he layed back down on his red velvet couch, motioning with his hands for you to continue feeding him.
now you were even more confused, the prince nicknamed "iron of evil" was making a joke? (and what was m'lady about, you were quite literally a commoner) you set the ruffles back down and continue pricking the grapes from the vine and into his mouth, this was probably your least favorite task he requested you do.
not because it was hard but because the prince was completely different from how he presented himself to the public.
moaning and whimpering exaggeratedly as you fed him the fruit, the worst is when he licks at your fingers, even taking one into his mouth, pearly whiteness flicking around the digit.
he always seemed to be smiling around you, it was worse knowing how horrible he could be to others.
like that time a noble staying temporarily was caught trying to poison him, usually their sentence to death would be immediate no questions asked but this prince loved to play games.
it was in the throne room, two gaurds stood by the captive and the prince stood in front of him ( you standing silently by his side praying they wouldn't behead him in front of you ) .
and after staring at the man for almost ten minutes without saying a word, he turned to you.
"pick a number between 1 and 1,000"
you jumped, eyes flickering between the man and the prince, "don't look at him, look at me. number quickly." he graps your jaw within seconds. you gasp, there was no arguing with the prince.
you stared directly into his eyes, sputtering out a number, "o-one"
"hmm." his grip doesn't falter, instead he turns your face side to side peering at all your features. "would you look at this, you actually have a desireable face."
you didn't know wether to take it as a compliment or an insult.
he finally lets go, "okay, have him drawn in quarterd. i want him out of my sight."
you gulped, guilt shredding at your heart as the man screamed. now you felt responsible for his punishment, though you suspect he would have done anything he liked anyways.
as usual.
the prince kisses your palm bringing you back to the present, he's been like this lately too. becoming affectionate in private spaces ( and in public spaces ), insisting you dote on him, care for him and play good girl all while you face the consequences ( many people think you're secretly sleeping with him, though hes met his suitor many times )
"what are you thinking of, tell me your thoughts love."
you gulped, "well honestly my prince i was thinking this is highly inappropriate and that your should stop so that the both of us will avoid trouble, and also—"
the prince stops kissing you, darkened eyes glaring at you viciously. "[Name]" he said suddenly.
you gulp, regretting your decision to speak up immediately.
"you're perfect, okay? i need you to continue being perfect so that everyone here stays happy alright?" you nod. "and i told you to stop calling me that."
"i-i apologize my-sorry um, Anul."
Anul grins and shifts his body to sit upwards, "good, now come here." he motions to his lap and you sigh, as of the past few weeks this was common as well. he pats his thigh impatiently and you smooth down your skirt to move towards him. his arms are around you before you can even make it on him, his nose grazing your neck, "mm, perfect, all mine, so perfect."
you sigh again and fold your hands over your lap, you wouldn't deny this prince was comfortable to sit on but it was not only highly unprofessional but horribly nerve racking.
you were just glad nobody was in here to see it.
and just then a knock came from the door. you scramble to move but Anul hold on fast, "come in." his voice was like murky water compared to how he was speaking to you before.
another servant maid opens the door, looking at your turned down face for a moment before adressing her reason for being here. "uhm, [Name] has been requested in the chambers by Ms. Jalei just for a quick meeting." Ms. Jalei was the head of all thr maids in the palace.
Anul looks bored at her. "She's busy." and quickly turns back to you, but the maid hasnt left yet.
she clears her throat again, "it's umh, it's urgent." she say looking at you and the man, his arms tighten around your waist. "[Name]? what should i do? seems likes there another pest trying to disturb our peace. number, 1-1,000" the maid freezes up, even she knew was this meant.
your eyes went wide as you looked at him, god not this again. "I-I don't want her to get hurt."
"Oh how sweet. Don't worry she won't feel a thing." Anul smiles devilishly. The maid looks ready to cry.
You turned between them, you hears what happened with the other guy, you didn't know who this was but you certianly didn't want her to get hurt, not because she f you anyways.
"w-what can i do? to fix it, i don't think she deserves such a punishment. it's me there asking for anyways, so what should i do?" you pleaded.
that caught his attention, "What you can do...?" He thought for a moment, "You. Get out."
The door was such in seconds.
"ya' know ever since i've met you [Name] i've just been so much better, i'd really love it if you gave me a kiss. I think i deserve it dont you?"
you gulped, you saw something like this coming, you were prepared. you gave a small okay and Anul shifted so you were sitting on his crotch rather than his lap. "okay here i go." and placed the tiniest contact on his lips he almost missed it.
he blinked, "what was that."
"well, i just kisses you my prince. as you requested."
"that wasn't a kiss."
"well—" you don't get a chance to answer as he cups your mouth with his, your tounge sliding on the roof of his mouth, by the time he's finished you can barely breath. his hands had someway crawled themselves onto your side and he found himself craving you, needing you carnally and more than ever. he lets go.
"that was a kiss, and don't make me teach you again."
big dog owner katsuki at the dog park (thinking maybe a husky or a shiba something fluffy with an attitude problem) and you come in with your little mini poodle or something equally as small and you see bakugou with his big scary muscles in his all black gym gear, heavy boots because he didn’t change out of them after getting home and taking his pup on a walk and you think he’s so hot, so unbelievably hot that you know this is gonna end badly. not because he has a big scary dog but because your tiny little one is a fucking asshole.
he’s not entirely reactive, (he’s a rescue and you don’t know his past) he’s just a lil anxious and got little dog syndrome where thinks he is a big scary malamute when in reality he is the size of one of the alaskan hounds sheds. so you don’t go into the park, the second you spot bakugou and his dog, you turn on your heels, but the sound of the gate has already alerted him to your presence and you’re already halfway out, your own dog tucked under your arm for the safety of the shiba on the other side of the gate.
“just cause he’s big doesn’t mean he’s dangerous, you know.” you hear bakugou call out, irritation evident in the way he drawls his words.
you stop, sigh and turn back. “ohh i know, it’s my dog that’s the problem. he’s the asshole”
bakugou raises a brow. “that thing?”
this pisses you off. “yeah. this thing is a rescue so he gets a bit iffy around dogs he doesn’t know.”
“oh.” is all the blond can say.
“yeah. oh.” you mock, tightening your arm around your dog. “not everyone is out to get you because you have a big scary dog.”
“guess the asshole trait runs in the family huh.”
“sorry?”
bakugou laughs, low and clipped and ready for a fight. “just saying. your dogs an asshole, you’re an asshole. looks like he found the right home.”
“says the guy who’s at the dog park in a fucking tank top in 10 degree weather.” you sneer, blood boiling at the brazenness of this man. “got a big dog and big muscles, overcompensating for something?”
katsuki howls a laugh, teeth bared and ready to snap. “why don’t you come over here and find out?”
“i’d rather not be disappointed anymore than i already am.” your deadpan, completely bored with the man before you. “have fun with your muscles and whatever the fuck you’ve got going on there” you turn on your heels, tiny shaking dog tucked under your arm and head back for the footpath, away from the safety of the rudest (hottest) man you’ve ever met.
it’s not till three days later when you glimpse the news do you see the asshole from the dog parks face on the tv. pro hero dynamight flashes his angry grin on the screen, the camera panning quickly as he holds up a hand to swipe the attention away muttering a curse under his breath as he blasts away.
fuck.
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