vampire lover

laura • 23 • she/they • personal for aopositn

[pallidprincess]

guy tries to toss a cigarette on the ground but the ground parries it and it flies back into his mouth and he solemnly continues to smoke it

[bunniope]

the jerk store called. and they said. sorry wrong number. i love you

[gummybard]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to be a stressed adult male protagonist splashing water on his face in the bathroom

[the-punforgiven]

This is it this is my magnum opus audio design is my passion

[doesnotloveyou]

i defy anyone who tells me this is not the original audio

[sluttynurse]

me in the not-so-distant future of 2032 taking my beautiful wife out for a walk on a foggy day: damn it's like silent hill up in this bitch! 😂

my wife: fuck you you say that every time it's a little foggy outside. you haven't even played the games. i hate you so much

our clone of former beatles drummer ringo starr who we normally keep locked in our basement but is currently joining us for his allotted 30 minutes of weekly outside time: ringo!

[fillemoderne-deactivated2026021]

Rocky Horror: on VHS

[memorycycle]

i could jumpstart a car with my breasts

[memorycycle]

yeah whatever next time ur stuck out on the road dont expecr me to come bouncing

[clementineoil]

i love when flowers close in the evening like good night girl i love you sleep tight

[chips1977]

i heard my nephew got enslaved by cave bugs

[uncleleoofficialfanclub]

wait to post about this until you’ve confirmed it

[chips1977]

sorry

[mulletbutch]

I think this picture of my gf helping fix my car should be in the MoMa

[adamsmasher]

[hotvampireadjacent]

Ughh….. nah man I can’t drive. Fucked up on jasmine rice right now.

[hotvampireadjacent]

I can quit any time I want just. One more bowl 🍚

[geopsych]

Bridget experiencing the wonder of life. Or maybe just fun.

[whereshadowsmakeshadows-deactiv]

Spongebob didn’t swallow cum or eat ass or have clinical depression or any of this stuff on these memes he loved his friends and making krabby patties

[cannibalchicken]

[kermit-the-grog]

We've all been there, feed the worms and get better next time, don't let it get you down :)

[eremitical]

i think we shouod terraform earth to make it completely flat because itd be fun

[eremitical]

i meant completely smooth but flat it actuwlly funnier

[tonysaintborgi]

new flat earth thearoy: we could do it

[regexkind]

I think that when we tell teenagers that their lives will be over if they don't have the most perfect possible trajectory through the education system, that this is, perhaps, if I may be bold, not good for them,

[cuteness--overload]

[carby]

she said

🥖