Iāve done this.Ā Iām alive because of this.Ā
My flat-mateās date for the night was almost as drunk as her.Ā She had passed out in her room and locked the door.Ā He refused to leave because he wanted to have sex.Ā He also demanded food because he was dealing withĀ āwhiskey dickā.Ā He didnāt like the lack of food in the fridge.Ā I called 911, did the stuff stated above, and he was getting PISSED about how long theĀ āorderā was taking.Ā He took my phone, demanded theyĀ āhurry the fuck upā.Ā Police arrived two minutes later, arrested him, and helped me file a police report.Ā Pressing charges wasnāt necessary because he had warrants on him from THREE different states for the very thing he planned to do to me.Ā Several months after this happened one of the officers informed me he was charged with two felonies because he crossed stay lines, and will be serving no less than 35 years in prison.Ā The officer ripped into my flat-mate about her bringing home complete strangers, while drunk, knowing full well this shit could happen.Ā
This was 14 years ago.Ā Ā
Do the pizza order, do it as calmly as you can.Ā The dispatcher I spoke to said things like this:
āIf heās drunk say you want mushrooms.āĀ I said I want extra mushrooms.
āIf heās threatening you with sexual assault say you want onions.āĀ I said I want onions.
She went like this with different toppings and sauces for a description of him, like pineapple if heās blonde, black olives if heās tall, extra large if heās tall, etc.
Theyāve heard this sort of coded call before.Ā Theyāre trained for it.Ā They will understand what youāre saying.Ā Order the pizza.
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