Flying

In my dreams I have wings

[shittymoviedetails]

In the movie venom during the first human trials of the symbiote, the research team is happy that the patients “vitals are holding steady”. This is a reference to the production team not consulting a single medical professional to find out what good vital signs look like.

[thissitewasamistake-deactivated]

Ah yes, a pulse of 136 And an oxygen saturation of 81%

The ideal levels

[luckyspike]

Yes nothing to be concerned about there

Perfectly normal

[tharook]

They said they were holding steady, not that they were holding healthy.

[nudityandnerdery]

“Patient’s vitals are steady.” “Doctor… They’re dead.” “And maintaining that state quite well.”

[mercurialmilk]

What’s the most outrageous ‘eating sin’ you’ve ever witnessed? (via r/askreddit)

[elchileno1997]

I’ll never forget the time I had a huge bag of pizza rolls at my friends new apartment. We had nothing to cook them with and were way too stoned. So I just ate like 15-20 of them frozen. They’ll never let me live it down.

[laufie]

It could happen to anyone. People bury a person alive to scare them or to get rid of them. In this situation, rely only on yourself.

Do not waste oxygen. In a classic coffin there’s only enough oxygen for about an hour, maybe two. Inhale deeply, exhale very slowly. Once inhaled - do not swallow, or you will start to hyperventilate. Do not light up lighters or matches, they will waste oxygen. Using a flashlight is allowed. Screaming increases anxiety, which causes increased heartbeat and therefore - waste of oxygen. So don’t scream.

Shake up the lid with your hands. In some cheap low-quality coffins you will be able to even make a hole (with an engagement ring or a belt buckle.)

Cross your arms over your chest, holding onto your shoulders with your hands, and pull the shirt off upward. Tie it in a knot above your head, like so: 

This will prevent you from suffocating when the dirt falls on your face. 

Kick the lid with your legs. In some cheap coffins the lid is broken or damaged already after being buried, due to the weight of the ground above it. 

As soon as the lid breaks, throw and move the dirt that falls through in the direction of your feet. When it takes up a lot of space, try pressing the ground to the sides of the coffin with your legs and feet. Move around a bit. 

Whatever you do - your main goal is to sit up: dirt will fill up the empty space and move to your advantage, so no matter what - do not stop and try breathing steadily and calmly. 

Get up. Remember: the dirt in the grave is very loose, so battling your way up will be easier than it seems. It’s the other way around during a rainy weather however, since water makes dirt heavy and sticky. 

[cosmicredshit]

JUST TO PROVE TUMBLR HAS A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR FUCKING EVERYTHING.

[gnarlyxxradical-blog]

just in case guys

[soycaptainandtheworldoftomorrow]

it could happen to anyone

[cosmic-noir]

WHERE WAS THIS WHEN I NEEDED IT

[stimman4000]

.

[tangarang]

cool so the music in this made me pee and cry

[dankmemeuniversity]

[fifty-shadesofgay]

i just astral projected back to 2009

[teainawineglass]

Holy shit

[lovelessblade]

The more time that passes the funnier this gets because a lot of people won’t understand it.

[invaderxan]

Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought I’d post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.

Reblog to save a life?

[theindependentconservative]

Reblog to save a life.

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Sharing because it’s actually a verified and sourced thing and not one of those dumbass fake tip posts.

[mainflopgirl]

[americaninfographic]

Cat Behavior

[cleoolsson]

a lot of people tend to confuse cats showing their belly for belly rubs, but it’s actually only something dogs do, for cats its a sign of respect and trust, they are not expecting to get pet, so when they do it’s not uncommon they get startled or think its play fight, of course there are expectations and some cats who ADORES belly rubs

[tahthetrickster]

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

[zmenit]

“THAT’S RIGHT TWAS I that set the house ablaze!!!”

[3fluffies]

Dying.

[ciatri]

Every fucking time I know what’s at the bottom and every time I still lose my shit.

[90stvqueen]

[lavenderpoetryx]

Does Your Daughter Know It's OK To Be Angry?

Girls, taught to ignore their anger, become disassociated from themselves.

Most girls and women understand the risks they take when they become angry. 

No matter how justified, appearing angry won’t do her any favors and will actually undermine people’s perception of her competence and likeability. 

For men, anger reinforces traditional gender expectations, for women it confounds them. That conflict by itself is a source of anxiety.

Girls are more likely to learn that their feelings of anger, no matter the reason they have them, are “wrong” and out of sync with their identities as girls. 

Anger is diverted in women, who, as girls, lose even the awareness of their own anger as anger. 

Girls are taught, through politeness norms that suppress disruptive behavior, to use indirect methods of dealing with rage. 

For example, it’s “unladylike” to be loud, or “vulgar” to curse, yell, or seem unattractive. Adaptable girls find socially acceptable ways to internalize or channel their discomfort and ire, sometimes at great personal cost. 

Passive aggressive behavior, anxiety, and depression are common effects. 

Keep reading

[gahdamnpunk]

YOO SPREAD THE WORD PEOPLE

[ryokoson]

Save a marker, SPREAD THE WORD!!!!

[oolathurman]

It’s called the crayola colorcycle program! As on its FAQ, they mention the following:

“Crayola ColorCycle will accept all brands of plastic markers, not just Crayola markers. That includes dry erase markers and highlighters! ColorCycle will eliminate placing hundreds of tons of markers into landfills.”

There do seem to be some limits, however, as far as I can tell, anyone can ship in a box of markers. “Any sturdy cardboard box with minimal outer markings will work. The more markers you ship, the more efficient this program will be. We suggest a minimum of 100 markers and a maximum of up to 40 pounds.”

[lizzieinthesky]

Also, look for the Crayon Initiative. 

Their whole things work with used, donated crayons they melt and make new ones to donate to children’s hospitals. 

[zero-initiative]

This is a really good idea, especially if you are trying to find an economic friendly way to get markers or crayons out of your abode without throwing them in the trash

[catchymemes]

[gallusrostromegalus]

So while I was getting my haircut, the lady asked me if I had other plans for the day and I said:

“I’m just going to pick up the boy from daycare and then it’s date night.”

And the lady says “Oh! How old is he?”

“He’s three.”

“Mine too! Where are you registering him for kindergarten it’s such a hassle-”

And that’s when I realized I said “boy” and not “dog” because I always think of Charlie as “good boy” but this slip up has lead to a miscommunication.

The lady is now 6 minutes into a clearly needed rant about how unnecessarily complex shopping for schools is, esp when you have a neurodivergent child, so I can’t just tell her that Charlie is a dog because then she’ll feel awkward for unloading on me and she clearly has enough going on.

So the rest of the haircut became a game of “how much can I say about Charlie without revealing that he is not a human child?” And the answer is “enough to cover a half hour hair appointment, quite possibly several hours worth if I’m specific enough”

[gallusrostromegalus]

“is he very verbal?”

“It really depends on who he’s with. He’s very quiet at he but won’t shut up if he’s at the park or has a friend over.”

“was it hard to potty-train him?”

“he’s adopted, but I was genuinely amazed at how good he already was with hygene and potty stuff.”

“mine’s just obsessed with paw patrol and Frozen, drives me crazy!”

“I imagine. Charlie is colorblind so he’s not as into tv, but he always wants a toy if I take him anywhere with them.”

“oh gosh the toys! And the kids are so rough on them!”

“yeah Charlie can destroy a stuffed animal in about 2 minutes, so I only buy him the really cheap ones.”

“Does he throw tantrums when they break?”

“Not really. It’s meditative, really, taking them apart. He has hysterics if the cat takes his toys though. Runs downstairs and cries at me until I retrieve it because he’s not tall enough to get it out of the cat tree.”

[tinychubbybarista]

[princesstigerbelle]

BOX FOR PLAY

[tangerinebonfire]

Look at this beautiful angel

[princesstigerbelle]

[kuvaton]

[dankmemeuniversity]