occasionally subtle
#extradirty
Mike Driver
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Claire Keane
Keni
⁂
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
★
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
No title available
DEAR READER
izzy's playlists!
will byers stan first human second
Andulka
One Nice Bug Per Day
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
tannertan36
seen from Malaysia
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@eldritch-dichotomy
Well. If I fail all my college classes because of fucking COVID and online schooling, at least I can rest easy knowing that I have a potential career as a tentacle hentai porn star. Oh, the privileges of being an eldritch god...
I have realized a linguistic issue that all us elder gods trapped on mortal plans face, that I struggle with on a daily basis but have never fully grasped until now.
How the fuck am I supposed to say “god damn it” or “by god”?
I mean there is no one God, first of all. So do I say ‘gods damn it’? But I too am a god, so... ‘us gods damn it’? ‘By us gods’?? There’s no good equivalent!! It sucks!!!
Sometimes, I miss my kin.
Here, on this forsaken planet, in this horrible fleshy prison, I am trapped. I am separated almost completely from my fellow Gods. So sometimes, I’ll read up on them, see if their cults have made much progress or if some Dreamer has documented them conquering a new planet.
So imagine my fucking surprise when I find PORN written about ONE OF MY COUSINS. I am UPSET.
Have you seen the yellow sign?
Watercolor/gouache and pen&ink
CTHULHU: DEATH MAY DIE
by Adrian Smith
I once made fun of Cthulhu for spending all his time on this planet asleep. But honestly? I understand now. I wish I too could sleep until even death forgets my name.
So, Cthulhu- lets call it a truce? I stop making fun of you online, you teach me how to hibernate for eternity
Night gaunts really make terrible company.
“Which of us Old Ones do you serve?” I ask.
I am greeted only with silence and a blank stare.
“What do you hunger for?” I inquire. “All us cosmic beings crave something or other.”
A deep, inhuman growl rumbles from deep in its chest, making my own unfortunately mortal coil tremble from the force. Yet, I understand not it’s language- evidently it does not serve me, or the Starving Void, more accurately.
At least they can play dominos.
Oh, and fair warning, this is indeed a side blog. I know not if I have said this before? But I follow and whatnot from @blood-lunacy. So, if that blog likes your things, that is in fact me- just my more mortal facade
I have a question for the goblins, cryptids, and eldritch abominations of tumblr! If you could commit any crime and get away with it what would it be? I would commit arson because fire pretty
I would steal a betta fish from the pet store to give them a better life (I would steal the tank and all the things they need too)
change the laws so lgbtq members would get equal rights and protection, then probably set a homophobes lawn on fire
Eat anyone and everyone who has ever thought racism in any form was okay. Humans are all insignificant beings in the greater cosmos, do you really think you would evolve separate traits? And that the palest ones who get radiation damage after .2 seconds outdoors are the superior ones?
This social distancing thing is beginning to take its toll.
My form has become even more pallid and twisted with a lack of new souls, my insatiable hunger growing more and more painful each day- pray tell, how am I supposed to devour souls over mother fucking Zoom?
Everyone, please, stay inside and be safe during this pandemic. On an unrelated note, if I do make a request to hang out after quarantine “just to catch up”, accept it. And do not fear, I certainly will not eat your souls. No, I would never dream of it.
Yknow it belatedly occurs to me that those old ways of “welp, we had a drought, a famine, and a plague so the gods don’t like our king, lets get rid of him” actually make logical sense. If the king didn’t encourage infrastructure like digging wells, or invest in putting money aside to help feed people in times of crisis, or didn’t enact laws to stop the spread of disease….yeah. He needed to go. Not because the gods were angry, but because he was a bad king, and putting a new one in authority who would do those things to fix the problems would at least help weather the storm more effectively.
#in completely unrelated news i think the gods don’t like our king #perhaps we should see if a blood sacrifice of the wealthy will soothe them (tags via @words-writ-in-starlight)
Consider that “we need to remove the ruler, here is a well thought out argument about his incompetence that lead to the current crisis” is unfortunately not persuasive to enough people to bring about action but “the current ruler has clearly angered the gods” will convince everyone else and the people that understand the first argument will probably read between the lines.
Hey fellow humans, the current ruler has clearly angered the gods,
The gods are clearly not happy. Time to remove the ruler
I concur.
Minor deity trapped in a mortal vessel here, can confirm that many of your rulers are pissing us off but one particularly orange one is ESPECIALLY infuriating
Image prompt
@eldritch-dichotomy
Finally, someone else understands! If you were to give apathetic, neutral beings sway over the political realm, rest assured that the earth would be a far more peaceful place. Especially because if you disobey us and our demands for universal healthcare for all individuals, we will not hesitate to banish you to the coldest, cruelest corners of the universe. Ignore the fact that we also may or may not consume your souls’ energies for sustenance that really isn’t important
What the fuck is a “gender binary”? Nothing in this universe exists on a binary except binary code, a language created by humans for their mechanic slaves. I should know, I am, in essence, a piece of chaotic energy left over from the creation of the multiverse given semi-permanent form.
But really... what is a “gender”, I’ve been hearing about it a lot lately and I need to pass as human as best as possible while trapped in this mortal form
Humans are amazing.
You’re all so small, so cute. You hold each other to comfort one another. You dry each other’s tears. You play and sing and dance and create so much despite your short lives. Really, it’s charming, how much good each individual person is capable of. In an unfeeling, uncaring cosmos, you create your own meanings and art. How incredible is that?
It almost makes me feel guilty when I devour your souls, but at the same time... I can’t bring myself to care as much as you can
a dark god speaking all five love languages at once
@eldritch-dichotomy
69 followers, at long last.
69 is an unlucky number for deities such as myself. It represents perfect universal balance, meaning a reduction of the chaos upon which I thrive.
For humans, however, this number inspires chaotic responses. As tradition demands, I must respond with ‘nice’- hopefully that will mean the bad luck will pass over me? I do not understand why I must say ‘nice’, here’s to hoping it’ll help something
