[jtightpants]

[ralfmaximus]

Reblog to come play this stupid homemade board game we're all making.

[firesidoni]

(tags via @dycefic )

[snout]

the years have made me weird and strange to talk to. but still i must post

[charlesoberonn]

The United States has 3 times as many Jerusalems as Israel

[charlesoberonn]

10 times as many Londons as England

[charlesoberonn]

30 times as many Parises as France

[charlesoberonn]

[charlesoberonn]

World capitals, but they’re all in Arkansas.

I actually think Illinois has more world capitals in it but they’re not as funny.

[noselikeringo]

New York ran out of names to take so they just started taking other states

[foxgirlofficial]

Maryland has Hollywood AND California!

[writingnotes520]

[teaboot]

Too bad the prophet Cassandra never met Odysseus

[teaboot]

They say if she made a prophecy Nobody would believe her

[edgar-allan-possum]

I’ve gotta say, that is exactly the kind of stupid thing that probably would circumvent a curse.

[elidyce]

Cassandra: YOU ARE ALL GOING TO REGRET THIS SO MUCH YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW. 

Odysseus: Regret it why?

Cassandra: You won’t believe me if I tell you. If I prophecy, nobody believes me. That is my curse.

Odysseus: … I’m Nobody. Fill me in. 

*A couple of months later* 

Odysseus: HELLO PENELOPE, I AM HERE PRECISELY ON TIME AND NOT YEARS LATE incidentally I rescued and adopted a Trojan seer while I was away, she’s great, got me home really fast, Cassandra this is your new mother who’s not going to treat you like shit. 

Penelope: … I’m going to need more details, but okay, sure. 

Cassandra: *in tears* I love you, new family. 

[cipheramnesia]

Cassandra: Penelope, I’ve had another vision.

Penelope, sighs: Go tell your father.

[val-the-bun]

[funpression]

sometimes you dont eat fruit for awhile and then you eat some fruit and you're like oh fuck its fruit

[cock]

tumblr is basically a gay bar in a mental institute

[luftwaffel-deactivated20131125]

who did you have to kill to get that URL

[flashdrive-fucker]

this is the perfect post. an already fantastic opening line. but while youre distracted by that, the next guy fucking smacks you in the face with cock

[nyawave]

just like the gay bar

[cerealistlover]

BYE I KEEP RUNNING INTO OGS OF ICONIC POSTS WHAT IS HAPPENING

[readerofallsins]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame your turn

[molabuddy]

having ocs is so fucked .... i miss them so bad but im the guy who has to create new content. but im sleepy

[mallardstomb115-deactivated2026]

these falsettos reviews on letterboxd are wonderful

[animentality]

[hesgomorrah]

[audyssey55]

[asteroidtroglodyte]

BESTIES

[winsaykophum]

[shadybug]

[sandmandaddy69]

[ourdarling]

everyone shut the fuck up and look at this snake named barcode

[homunculus-argument]

Add realism to your fantasy stories by having characters from different backgrounds struggle to pronounce each others' names.

"My name is [low guttural sound] but I don't want to hear you butcher it. So you may call me She Who Arises With The Cold Mountain Sun."

"...Is that what your name really means? All that in just one word?"

"Yes. If you stress the wrong syllable it comes out as 'She Who Coldly Wakes Up The Mountain Sun', or 'The Cold Woman Who Wakes The Mountain Sun', and you will not call me that."

"Oh, huh. Could we just call you Mountain Sun, for short?"

"Hmh. It's boastful, almost bordering on blasphemy, but it is flattering. I accept it."

[homunculus-argument]

I just came up with a really inconvenient, possibly unplayable four-player game: The Evil Advisor

All you need is a completely normal chess board and a deck of cards that you can somehow divide into an even amount of cards that mean "yes" or "no". Out of the four players, only two need to know how to play chess - those play the role of advisor. The other two play as rulers. At the start of the game, both advisors pull a random card from the deck, which dictates whether their goal is to win the game, or lose it. They keep their respective card, showing it to nobody else.

The rulers, who ultimately choose where to move the pieces, always aim to win the chess game, and also know that the advisor may or may not be on their side, and don't know whether to trust the advisor or not.

If the ruler wins the chess game, they win the whole game. An advisor only wins if they reach their own goal - if an advisor's goal was to lose, but the ruler wins, the advisor loses, and vice versa.

[sandmandaddy69]

[minovskyy]

i love this website i just feel at home here you know

[sandmandaddy69]