Here's the deal brochachos. Emmrich Volkarin has no chill. Zero. Is he smooth? Hell yes, and also exclusively when he's prepared to be. Surprised!Emmrich has no control over his facial expression and has never heard of words.
This is why Rook is such a distraction for him. Rook, as we all know, is a goblin. They are a pretty goblin, and even sometimes a very effectively diplomatic and strategic one, but that does not negate their intrinsic goblinhood. They live in a magic house with a magic butler and still sleep on a couch in a room that doesn't ever get fully dark. They walk up to strangers and say, "I'll fix your personal problems in exchange for you going head to head against not one but two literal gods and also they're both pretty gross and mean," and somehow people are like, "Yeah, that sounds like a great trade." They have conversations with a dead man and and the pointy-eared Che Guevarra who lives in their head. They saw Big Danger Magic happening and thought, "What if I drop a building-sized statue on it?"
And now Emmrich, who lives for routine and a nice cuppa, who had upsettingly clear handwriting at the age of seven and was writing in impeccable copperplate by twelve, lives in the next room to a person who wanders in late at night, sees him talking to a dead body, says, "Totes hot," and leaves. Once they spent an entire day out in the wetlands referring to Manfred as "Maxwell" and failing to hold a straight face when they insisted Emmrich was just mishearing them. (Davrin thought it was funny but not more than it was bewildering.)
I think this is why Emmrich likes them so much. Most of the time when he's caught off guard it's actually super dangerous, so having his emotions batted around like a piece of string at the hands of a weirdly affectionate but very violent cat is both novel and thrilling in a way that's unlikely to get his face ripped of by Beings. Rook is a safe space for Emmrich to explore the sensation of feeling completely unmoored (why are they climbing the Lighthouse?) without risking actual harm.
Rotating no stamina Emmrich in my brain. He's all silver tongue and clever fingers, but once he puts it in he's fully in his emotions and sensitive and smitten aaaaand well, that was that. For the thirty seconds he lasts, he worships Rook's body like no one ever has. That is exactly his downfall. He is fully unable to emotionally or physically disconnect from the situation long enough to collect himself. He genuinely just doesn't know how. You think he remembers his breathing exercises while balls-deep inside the love of his life? Not a chance. He is a whimpering mess IMMEDIATELY. Every time.
He's skilled with his tongue and deeply commited to making it up to Rook afterwards. He's deeply apologetic. Probably cries after the first few times this happens because he's convinced they'll leave him over it, while Rook is just head over heels over here going "you mean to tell me this absolute angel of a man loves me so much he can't last two minutes inside me?"
Pairing: Emmrich x Leo de Riva (Male Crow Rook/OC)
Summary: Angst, anxiety attack followed by fluff also warning, i don't speak Spanish good.
Leo was just on the verge of sleep. His body was still and heavy, his body would have reached sleep in another two minutes if everything around him stayed still. Emmrich’s bed had proved to be an upgrade from his in Treviso, and it was perfect for the Antivan side-sleeper. But of course, there was movement in their bed. Emmrich had his arm draped over Leo’s side, but he had rolled over. He assumed there was nothing wrong with Emmrich, maybe he had gotten too hot, Leo still pouted a little bit before once again relaxing and willing his body to sleep. He felt Emmrich shift one more time, it felt as though he was getting up, but sleep took Leo. Leo hadn’t been asleep for very long, and he was usually a deep sleeper, but the softest sound woke him out of sleep.
A soft sob.
Leo moaned lightly and opened his eyes. He was never pleasant to wake up to to witness in the morning. Another sob. Leo rolled over and in the darkness, Leo could make out Emmrich’s profile. He was sitting up, his knees up and his face hidden in them, like a terrified child, and crying. Leo’s mind flashed quickly to little Marcella having a nightmare. He was no longer groggy, only worried.
“Hey,” Leo said and sat up. Once it was clear to Emmrich that his partner was awake, he sobbed loudly, having been keeping in as much sound as he could before. “Emmrich, Emmrich,” Leo said and reached out to Emmrich. Emmrich took in a sharp breath and flinched before Leo could even touch him. Leo pulled back and frowned. Emmrich’s back was shaking, his breath was quick and shallow. Leo turned more concerned at the sound of his breathing. Emmrich was a sensitive man, Leo had seen him cry before, but not like this.
“Please go back to sleep, Leo,” Emmrich managed through shaking breaths. Leo was absolutely not going back to sleep. But for the first time in their relationship, Emmrich was pushing Leo away. Leo recognized what this was immediately and he got himself out of bed.
Leo walked to the washroom and filled a small cup from their sink and filled it with water and walked back into their bedroom. He walked as carefully as he could to Emmrich’s side of the bed and placed the water down next to him. Those sobs and shaking breaths were killing Leo, but this matter was delicate and he would need to be patient. Leo then sat down on the floor, leaning his back against the bed. Leo waited a beat before speaking again.
“Could you remind me, Emmrich, what’s in that jar on the mantle above the fireplace? The copper one?” Leo asked, and it sounded like it fell on deaf ears, as Emmrich’s crying never changed. “Manfred’s always so interested in it and I know you explained it to me before, but I forget,” he continued. Leo propped his knees up, waiting for a response from Emmrich. Nothing. He fiddled with his fingernails in the dark for a little while.
Emmrich was having an anxiety attack.
“Emm?” Leo asked, wanting more than anything to climb back up in the bed and hug Emmrich. But he couldn’t. He stayed on the floor, out of sight of Emmrich. “What color are my eyes?” He asked and Emmrich sniffed.
“Dark brown, like the color of coffee,” Emmrich managed and Leo smiled. Of course he knew what color his eyes were. If he could get Emmrich to talk, he could self-regulate his breathing.
“Mmmm coffee. Don’t get me craving that right before bed,” he said playfully. Emmrich didn’t respond, but kept sniffing, almost habitually. “Though, I hate to admit this, but it took me a while to realize that your eyes have a bit of brown in them. Or like a gold. I always assumed they were green. But there was that time in Arlathan where I was knocked out cold. I opened my eyes and your face was just inches from mine. Lovely way to wake up.” He said and smiled, almost feeling guilty that he was amusing himself more than Emmrich.
“Gold,” Emmrich managed and Leo turned his head to hear him. “You see gold because it’s your favorite color,” he managed and Leo smiled.
“You’re right, I can be less of a crow and more of a magpie,” he said and Emmrich chortled. Leo’s smile grew bigger. Not that big of an attack then. “I got you some water,” he mentioned. Emmrich sniffed again and sighed. Leo watched Emmrich’s hand come into sight and grab his water for a sip.
“You shouldn’t have to deal with me, my darling.” Leo turned around now to face Emmrich.
“It’s my privilege to,” he retorted. “I am the luckiest man in all of Thedas, Emmrich. So I consider myself lucky when I get to be the reason Emmrich Volkarin can sleep at night,” he said and he watched Emmrich’s head fall into his hands and sob once more. Leo stood up and sat next to Emmrich in the bed. “You can’t tell me you don’t think you’re worth a little humanity,” he said and gently placed a hand on Emmrich’s knee. Emmrich didn’t push him away this time.
“You are the young, thrilling hero, Leo. I am your broken burden,” Emmrich said through his fingers and Leo’s eyebrows furrowed.
“I’d duel a man for talking about my love like that,” he said seriously. It was true, once, Viago had tried to comment on their age gap and Leo had no problem threatening his cousin over it. He had even been a little aggressive with Harding; she had always seen a problem with Leo and Emmrich’s age gap. No one insulted Emmrich in front of Leo and got away with it. Not even Emmrich Volkarin himself. “Besides, you are just as much a hero as I am, and you are the furthest from a burden. You are my every joy, Emmrich.” Leo reached for Emmrich’s hands.
Emmrich reached over and took Leo’s hands. He would never believe Leo. It would take a lot to ever convince the necromancer that he deserved the lovable rogue. But he wouldn’t keep the mood down. He was happy to be able to breathe again. Emmrich’s bracelets jingled softly as Leo took his hands and rubbed Emmrich’s knuckles softly.
“I know what will make my mage happy. How about a magic trick?” Emmrich’s eyebrows raised in disbelief and a mild interest.
“I’m only a little offended that what I do for a profession and what an entire civilization is based off of, you consider a ‘trick’,” Emmrich said and Leo grinned. He doubted Emmrich would be snarky if he wasn’t absolutely feeling better. That’s all Leo wanted. Emmrich could be annoyed at him, as long as it calmed Emmrich down long enough to catch his breath and have a restful sleep. Leo continued to rub Emmrich’s hands with his thumbs.
“Only a simple, little trick. You know I could never do what you do, Emmrich. But it is magic all the same,” he said and Emmrich relaxed and little and sighed.
“Alright, go on then,” Emmrich said and Leo stared back at him. He let go of Emmrich’s hands, folding his own in his lap.
“Hmmm…must have…configured the uhm…valiances wrong,” Leo said and Emmrich blinked. “Didn’t work,” he shrugged and Emmrich shook his head with a sigh.
“Leo, first and foremost, it is ‘valances’ and one does not configure them, they already exist-”
“Oh, nevermind, it worked, just on the wrong hand,” Leo said and lifted his left hand, wiggling his fingers. Three of Emmrich’s gold rings had moved from Emmrich’s hands to Leo’s fingers. Emmrich stared at Leo’s hands and his mouth opened slightly. He didn’t feel any of that happen, of course. Along with being an assassin, poison maker, Emmrich now knew Leo was a professional thief. He’d heard about the Crows having a reputation for stealing. He’d never noticed it in Leo before. Emmrich looked at Leo, who was looking pretty smug. It was impressive, but it wasn’t magic.
“That is not magic, it was sleight of hand,” Emmrich said and held out his hand. Leo chuckled.
“No, those are the same thing. You manipulate the Fade with your fingers like a musician. I do the exact same but with physical items,” Leo explained and Emmrich shook his head. Leo removed the rings from his fingers and placed them in Emmrich’s hand. Emmrich put his rings back on his fingers. “Not impressed?”
“It was impressive, and it certainly lightened my mood, thank you my darling,” Emmrich said and looked down at his hand, rings back where they had been. “I can’t believe I didn’t feel you remove these, do you know that last time I went without wearing these?”
“Uhoh, I didn’t break some solemn oath for you, did I?” Leo asked and Emmrich shook his head and smiled.
“No, no marital band on my hand,” Emmrich said and Leo turned a little red.
“Oh? Good, you’re not married, I have been meaning to ask you that,” he said and Emmrich chuckled. “How are you feeling?” He asked, wishing for that moment to go away. Emmrich nodded.
“Fine, I’m fine. Exhausted, thank you Leo. I can usually self-regulate and take myself out of the moment, I can’t believe you excelled so naturally at releasing me of my own mind,” Emmrich said and Leo smiled, feeling a bit good about himself. It did feel nice to be useful to Emmrich.
”Don’t think for a moment that a bunch of tortured assassins don’t know their way around a midnight mental spiral,” Leo said and placed his hand on Emmrich’s thigh. Emmrich frowned. “Next time you feel that coming on, if you can, don’t just let me snore next to you,” he said and Emmrich chortled, taken out of his frown quickly.
”I will try, but you know it is hard to overcome that heavy guilt,” Emmrich said and Leo moved up on their bed a little.
”Yes, I understand that, maybe I should start laying on you before you fall asleep, ground you with weight,” he said and lowered himself down on Emmrich’s body. Emmrich felt the immediate warmth of Leo and the comfort of his weight. Leo heard and felt Emmrich laugh and the older man ran a hand through Leo’s long hair.
“Oh this cannot be comfortable for you, my love,” Emmrich said and kissed the top of Leo’s head. Leo hooked a leg around Emmrich’s.
“Don’t you tell me what makes me comfortable, Volkarin,” Leo said playfully. It was a strange position for him, surely, lying on his stomach, on top of poor Emmrich. Emmrich chuckled again. “Now, drink your water and let your…whatever the hell I am smother you to sleep.” Leo didn’t care for the word boyfriend. He didn’t care for the word partner. To Leo, the former was immature, the latter was too cold.
“Pareja,” Emmrich said softly. It took Leo’s brain a few seconds to comprehend what Emmrich just said and the younger man laughed softly. Emmrich was apparently teaching himself a little Ativan, but did not have the pronunciation down.
“Par-ey-ha,” Leo corrected him. “Pareja,” he repeated, rolling his ‘r’ a little obnoxiously and lifting his head. Emmrich looked down at him.
“Pareja,” he said, getting the second syllable correct, but he could roll that ‘r’. Leo grinned and sat up on his elbows, repeating himself and with his ‘r’ he rolled his hips against Emmrich and Emmrich laughed.
“You would be fired if you were a professor,” Emmrich said and placed his hands on Leo’s broad arms.
“Yes, but I’d have a lot of pupils,” he said with a low voice and dipped his head, kissing under Emmrich’s jaw with a tender sweetness. He felt Emmrich chuckle. “Are you feeling better, mi vida?” He asked softly and lifted his head to face Emmrich once again.
“Oh my darling, I am in paradise,” Emmrich said and Leo grinned down at his love and kissed him with a happy little sigh.
[Alt text: Emmrich presses his thumb to his lips, lost in thought. He is wearing rings on his left hand. Painted with the colors mint green, cyan, periwinkle, and lilac.]
I am absolutely in love with this color palette. Using teal for the shadows is such a vibe. ***Magical girl Emmrich Volkarin*** lol
He's beautiful in any color <3
Tag list: @narrated4you, @thepalehorsevictoria, @things-are-about-to-get-dicey, @kawaiiusagichansan, @dutifullysparklychaos
[Alt text: Emmrich is laying down and looking off into the distance. His relaxed right hand rests near his face. Painted with the colors lilac, periwinkle, cyan, and mint green.]
I had a lot of fun with this! and by fun, I mean I struggled with blood sweat and tears to draw this perspective lol. He's so handsommeee *explodes*
The cotton candy color palette was a manic choice but I love the finished result!
Tag list: @narrated4you, @thepalehorsevictoria, @things-are-about-to-get-dicey, @kawaiiusagichansan, @dutifullysparklychaos
Here's a sneak peak of a fic I've been writing (and rewriting) for weeks, it's set post Weisshaupt and is going to be EmRook first time :3
Kind of NSFW 🤷
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Emmrich stood and slowly walked towards Rook. He lent down, his long fingers cradling Rook’s chin gently as he tilted the younger man's head up, and kissed him. “I like it when a man knows what he wants.”
Rook was trembling. Anticipation thrummed through his body. That spot between his legs pulsed in a way that only happened with Emmrich. He was absolutely desperate for him and he didn't care if he knew anymore.
“Emmrich, we need to do this now or I might go crazy.” Rook admitted before grabbing Emmrich by the collar of his shirt and kissing him deeply.
A little finished snippet of my Gay Bar Goth Night EmmRook AU, featuring Dorian trying to keep any unsavory types (punk Rook) away from a tequila-drunk Emmrich.
“Ah-ah-ah!” Dorian tsked, intercepting his shoulder. “You will not take a step closer to that legless queen if you know what’s good for you!”
“Why's that?”
“Because that sweet mess of a man is going to survey the shape of your tonsils the moment you sit down.”
Right, perhaps that wasn’t the best way to dissuade him.
Chicken Little’s pale eyes went starry, “Oh.”
“Yes, ‘Oh’. And then I’ll have to deal with him crying all night because you abandoned him in the lav after he sucked your cock,” said Dorian wearily. It didn’t matter how many times he told Emmrich not to say ‘I love you’ right after swallowing a near-stranger’s load in a bathroom stall, it was like trying to get through a tequila-soaked brick wall.
“That’s horrible, I wouldn’t do that!”
“How awfully decent of you.”
“And I didn’t bring my cock with me, anyways.”
Ah! Well that explained the pastel-striped skull patch stitched over his breast pocket. Hardly surprising, the Lighthouse had been a bit of a hotbed for that sort since Maevaris started coming back in the aughts.
“Would that be a problem for your friend?” He asked with an affected bluster that Dorian sympathized with. Obviously some rejection there.
“Oh no, no, no – he’s a very obliging man. Takes metric and imperial. It can be a real headache sometimes.”
“A headache? Why?”
“Took him at least twice as long to sleep his way through the Humanities department.”
The Physics department hadn’t escaped unscathed either.
Please feel free to suggest songs, queer Dragon Age characters you'd like to see cameo, tattoos or piercings that Rook should have, and whether the Goth tradition of silver jewelry would beat out the Mourn Watch thing for gold. I am on the fence, honestly.
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