be gay, do crime

call me andi| they/them pronouns| queer| 18 years old | bday on April 16| lots of fandoms| fanartist at times

[enjolrpheus]

INTRO

previously known as def-not-kaz-brekker

I WROTE THIS LES MIS FIC PLS READ IT: mon amour

Name: andi (which is technically my illegal middle name, since my middle name hath become my deadname. I low-key like my legal first name, I've decided, so I'm just gonna change the middle name)

Pronouns: what are you, a cop?

Sexuality: lesbian and kinda on the aroace spectrum but hear me out, WOMEN

Age: 18

Birthday: 16th of April (or April 16th for the 'mericans)

Fav color: probably like red and green and gold and silver (take ur pick tbh all those work)

Godly parent: Apollo

Grisha order: Fabriktor (I’m a Durast)

Languages: Italian and English fluently (c2 grade b Cambridge English level certified as of March 2025!), learning French and I’m pretty good at it (b1 or b2 but my diploma only went up to A2+ regrettably), can sorta understand Spanish, not really German but kinda (a2 certified as of August 2025), like a song and a sentence in Japanese, one Latin song and an exorcism (I had a supernatural phase ok), the Ancient Greek alphabet (percy Jackson phase), a few words of Luxembourgish, did a bit of Indonesian and Chinese when I was in first grade so I know a few words there (I used to live in Indonesia), and that’s about it

Fandoms: lots of musicals (mostly Les Mis as of late), the Magnus archives, hellaverse, gravity falls, grishaverse, Riordanverse, good omens, sandman tv show, our flag means death, the owl house, Superwholock, keeper of the lost cities, others that I’m probably forgetting

Music taste: musicals, random shit idk mostly musicals

Side blog: @inej-ghafa-appreciation-posts

AO3: tervigerser_jackasseries

Pinterest account: https://pin.it/22TYpze

[ajcrowlor]

big tshirt that says MY INTERPRETATIONS MUST HAVE A STRONG BASIS IN THE SOURCE MATERIAL on the front and THIS IS FUN TO ME on the back

[heedra]

In elementary school, my best friend and I had this game we would play where we were school supplies living inside a child's desk and going on slice-of-life adventures inside it. And I remember that a key component of our school supply society was a sort of religious schism that existed around the purpose and nature of the giant hand that occasionally reached in to grab different citizens, use them, and then return them, because most school supplies considered this an auspicious and enviable moment of being selected for a greater purpose and allowed a glimpse of a vast truth, but pencils considered it a horrible portent of doom because they always got sharpened during it and came back smaller and closer to death. We were third graders btw.

[zerosocialskillz]

I'm pulling these tags out prev

[dogpuppy]

[real-language-facts]

why is it called a debit card if its not the one rhat gets you in debt

it is called a "de bit" card, for de bit

[cartooongasm]

[sunwornink]

here is your daily reminder to COMMENT ON THE AO3 FICS YOU READ! it goes such a long way, especially if it’s a multi-chapter work and you can only leave kudos once. ANYTHING is an acceptable comment—emojis, keyboard smash, screaming, in-depth analysis! i promise you, the writers want it ALL

[frizzycrls]

I am trying to work on this myself, lol

[hotvampireadjacent]

[furryprovocateur]

i dont know how to say this in a nice way but catholicism is easily the stupidest religion ever like dreadfully stupid

[rainbowgod666]

Wat.

[rainbowgod666]

No I'm serious what exactly you're referring to?

[furryprovocateur]

youre right i forgot about mormonism that is probably dumber

[the-haiku-bot]

youre right i forgot

about mormonism that

is probably dumber

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[goodmagicianproperthief]

kaz being canonically the smartest person in ketterdam but his aliases being so on the nose (e.g. johannus rietveld = just a mashup of his family names, kroon = crown, brekker = the first word he saw on a random piece of machinery) kills me so here are random names i think his many bank accounts are under:

llewelyn llewelyn

baz krekker

crowley van cup

mark (just mark)

heleen van stupidpants

every innuendo ever

duke addam von silverhaunch (ripped off from smeet’s daughter)

benedik (matthias’ middle name) treehugger

kanej ghafatvield

ioomen (the ‘i’ is silent)

on a similar note, need a fic where modern au kaz, criminal mastermind and barrel boss, sits at his desk, cracks his knuckles, and very seriously types ilovemagicandinej123 as the password to log into his computer

[despazito]

Another one for "objectively funny crimes should not be punished"

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

wow maybe i should try forgiving myself and never stop

[everythingwsnormalhere]

@enjolrpheus and i are well adjusted individuals

[enjolrpheus]

absolutely we are

[nothingbutloveforyou]

i love how the most mundane things suddenly become fun and enjoyable when you do them with someone you care about

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[stillnotmollified]

willing to bet money that “no, go back” is the least-pressed button in the history of the internet