One Hamster's Existential Crisis

What it says on the tin

[dailyhollanovgifs]

they wanted to be in each other's skin

[hudconera]

little gay yearning bottom eyes and big sexy russian to feast on

[theehorsepusssy]

[segamascott]

this person needs to get real

[konoko]

[angelic-ivy]

me: [writing something] shoot... what's this woman's pronouns?

stenographer: well her bio says she/her...

me: better play it safe anyway [writes "it"]

the ghost of marie curie: [appears out of thin air] ivy... you're the first person to ever correctly gender me in a hundred and eighty-two years. from the bottom of my cold dead heart, thank you.

me: [dies of radiation poisoning]

stenographer: [dies of radiation poisoning]

[angelic-ivy]

favorite tags. bulliness you get it. also someone tagged this post #rpf which i think is so fuckin funny. like yeah. i guess. i guess it is.

[dogpuppy]

Me when my asshole itches and I’m on the moon

[filmphotofranz]

[dogpuppy]

Do you have any more Gaither's Pond pictures I noticed you're getting into Gaither's Pond

[despazito]

[mevil]

[priorwalterxxxii]

last day of pride month lets all look at this tweet im im love with again. happy Pride bitchh!

[batshit-auspol]

Occasionally as an Australian you'll be talking to someone from overseas, and you'll discover a common phrase you took for granted is, in fact, not universally known outside of our country.

Turns out casually dropping "fuck me dead" into conversation will give unsuspecting Americans an aneurism.

The more you know.

[batshit-auspol]

Imagine being on a work call with an Aussie and they suddenly announce they're gonna blow a load in response to a problem.

[fred-the-dinosaur]

Not Aussie but I asked an American once if she was taking the piss ( i.e. pulling my leg, joking. Perfectly cromulent and friendly english expression)

and she got really upset because she thought I was threatening to piss ON her

[honiibbang]

This is killing me

[batshit-auspol]

Rifling through the tags, here's some other terms which are apparently causing mass carnage whenever they escape our borders:

Having a goon (i.e. Sipping on a delightful wine)

Having a gaytime (Eating an icecream)

Having a sticky beak (Investigating)

Take a squiz (To have a sticky beak)

Get stuffed (To express a revelation is most frightful)

Chuck a sickie (Take a day off work due to the humours being misaligned)

Chuck a wobbly (When one's temperament becomes visibly upset)

Carry on like a pork chop (Acting most silly indeed)

Thongs (flip flops)

Hot chook (Pre-cooked supermarket rotisserie chicken, otherwise known as the Bachelor's Handbag)

Fair suck of the sauce bottle (Let's be real)

Shits me to tears (Something is mildly annoying)

Not here to fuck spiders (Expressing a situation is serious)

Having a piss-up (A social gathering)

I'll shout you (offering to goon an old chum)

A cruisy place (a relaxed atmosphere, where one might shout and goon the night away while enjoying many a gaytime in your favourite thongs)

[buginateacup]

Some usamerican friends of mine recently learned the Aussie meaning of snail trail (the line of hair from the bellybutton heading south). They were horrified to say the least

[jessebloom]

first day of pride month

[segamascott]

[godlessondheimite]

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

[nobodys-odyssey]

Taylor Swift does this

[godlessondheimite]

no she doesn’t

[nobodys-odyssey]

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

[himynamesisnotemail]