The rivers, they are screaming.

27. I have no idea of what I am doing.

[saintd0nna]

happy pride to him

[trollrider1111]

Gay broke sober king 🤴

[homunculus-argument]

The Odyssey but retold as a low-stakes modern adventure of one guy out with his girlfriend leaving the bar with his buddies to do just one (1) simple thing real quick, it'll take like 15 minutes tops, he'll be right back, but then some bullshit happens and the trip keeps getting more complicated as more bullshit keeps happening while he just tries to get back to the bar because he promised his girlfriend that he'd get back and he knows that she's still there because she told him she'd wait there.

And by the time he finally gets back it's almost 3 am and the bar is about to close while she's sitting there stone cold sober, surrounded by 5 drunk guys unsuccessfully trying to convince her to give up on waiting for him and go home with one of them instead. And the guy shows up to proceed to beat the shit out of them before explaining himself to her like hey sorry bullshit kept happening, my phone fell into a storm drain and my wallet got stolen when I was trying to find someone who'd borrow me a phone so I could call and

[thekijs]

His girlfriend had been fending off the 5 drunk guys for most of the evening by explaining that even if she was going to ditch her boyfriend, she can't possibly leave without finishing her beer, which she is keeping perpetually full via careful sleight of hand where she's just pouring it back and forth into and out of the pitcher.

However the drunk guys are also drinking, and eventually she can't afford to buy another pitcher for the table so she can't keep up the ever-full beer glass trick. At this point she has to resort to setting up the pool trick shot that she's never seen anyone but her boyfriend pull off, and says she'll leave with whoever manages the shot first.

That buys her another hour or so and then, finally, her boyfriend makes it back. He looks like shit, hair down and just a mess, he's wearing an entirely different jacket that he got from an alley, and barely recognizable—especially to 5 guys who've been drunk for hours now. He lurks for a minute, finds out what's going on, and proceeds to pull off the trick shot first try. Throws the jacket off, fixes his hair with a hair tie his girlfriend lends him, finally looks like himself again, and THEN beats the shit out of them with the pool cue.

[weaselle]

yuh i was there, that's how it happened

[mawofthemagnetar]

What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?

When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[delicateboyz]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

[scribeherself]

[johnnycrass]

the issue with 2:15 is thats already 4 pm

[eyezehuhh]

Rhea Ripley (x)

[ooppo]

"He has a 12 inch cock" well my pussy ain't a fucking magicians hat bitch where is all that supposed to go

[ooppo]

[punksrhea]

RHEA RIPLEY WWE WrestleMania 42, April 19th, 2026

[butternaan]

do u guys remember when shah rukh khan was like im trisexual i like to try everyrhing

[butternaan]

obsessed withthis

[butternaan]

[butternaan]

yes these r real everyones forgetting srk is the original deranged heartthrob

[mograa]

this is my favorite thing in existence i quote this multiple times a month

don’t forget my favourite one

wait I forgot about my OTHER favourite one

[prettygirluvxoxo]

Thank you….just….

[kosmogrl]

[a-frog-in-a-bog]

[a-frog-in-a-bog]

[catboybiologist]

The one and only time I posted something negative about Taylor Swift, I got more anon hate than I have collectively gotten from TERFs in two years of this blog existing

[da-pitt]

THE NIGHT SHIFT

Season 2 Episode 15, 9:00 PM

[thebreakfastgenie]

I love the PTMC emergency attendings you've got passively suicidal, actively suicidal, uncontrolled seizures, and John Shen.

[warmfigure]

i am massively overdue for a very very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

[unlettered-heathen]

reblog to give prev a very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy