the way taash treats spite like a disobedient dog is so funny to me. everyone else is so hung up on spite being a demon while taash is like "i'm rivaini. spirits are normal to me and this one is going in timeout if he doesn't start behaving"
TOTALLY YAPPING BUT UGH TAAAAAAASH see, this is one of the things that made me completely fall in love with the character and I don't understand when people later said that them being autistic was just a headcanon when??? Dude like this is. This is a thing. A real thing a lot of people with autism experience.
Everything must turn out a certain way, and when it doesn't, we can experience this blinding rage. I've hit people because things didn't go the way I thought they would. I've raged and screamed because things didn't go the way I expected. It's this feeling that consumes you and blinds you and it's just this complete overload that makes you react intensely and that overwhelms you. I can't describe the number of times I've had to be physically restrained because something went wrong and I just broke down and got fucking stuck on it!!! Like why I'm being held on the floor by two grown ass adults just because my favorite shirt was ruined before an important event? Why do strangers have to keep me sitting with their hands holding my body on a park bench after I received a bad medical diagnosis? Why can't I stop screaming and crying and kicking? All that shit people don't want to talk about sometimes, that part of your brain that just shuts down and goes to hell! Because yeah you have autism and this is a thing that just fucking happens.
I love you Taash. Talking about their fear that the antaam might turn them into a berserker and I could only sigh and smile with my cheeks all red because holy shit if this wasn't my brain when my little sister cut up my favorite pair of socks, I don't know what else it is, honestly.
And Taash proves to you in the game that they can be broken, but Taash is the character with the most mature emotional intelligence of all of the Veilguard team and like me, they CAN and WILL return to themselves. They can cry and feel bad, but that anger doesn't explode. And it feels good to see them and think that I myself haven't had a similar episode in years.
Taash is strong, terrifyingly strong. They also had Rook to accompany them. We don't know exactly what happened to them during the island and their return to the Lighthouse, but we know that Taash is whole despite everything. That's what I love most about them.
They're afraid of going berserker and wiping out everything in their path, and I'm glad it never happens. Would it have been interesting as a "bad ending" option? Maybe. But if I know one thing, it's that Taash would always come back to themselves.
Confession: I’ve managed to go eight years in this hell fandom without finding Solas hot ONCE and bioware had the GAUL and the absolute fucking NERVE to have him show up to the final battle in Veilguard all bloody and fucked up. How DARE they.
Heyoo! As the title says, I’m opening up writing commissions! Cuz ya girl is poor and in need of money lol.
Here are my rules!
$15 USD for a 1k fic, + $5 for every extra thousand words up until 10k, which is my max word count. Also may charge more depending on the complexity of what you ask for, at my own discretion.
Whump, NSFW, noncon, and kink friendly! Though I may charge more depending on how I feel about the subject matter for certain things.
I’ll do your OCs, or a scenario you want to see, featuring my own OCs! I won’t do fanfic for legal reasons.
I reserve the right to deny any commission for any reason
Commissions will have no set timeline; I’m pretty busy with my own projects and other personal things, so I won’t try to guarantee any sort of expectation for time frame.
Payment should be sent after I’ve finished the com, but before I’ve given it to you. My preferred payment method is via paypal.
I reserve the right to choose whether or not to post any commissioned piece on my own tumblr or ao3
You can find examples of my work on my pinned post, and I will add more examples here as I post them.
If you’re interested, please contact me at [email protected]. I must clarify, that is ambr, NO E. please do not send my poor email neighbour com requests :)
no offense but I feel like youre writing the same thing constantly always smut and nothing interesting can you write a different more thought provoking story
Sure thing! I wrote this one just for you, bud. I hope that it’s sufficiently thought-provoking and suited to your superior tastes. Remember, I mean no offense at all!
The Stupid Fucking Anon Chronicles
Pairing: Joel Miller x Stupid Fucking Anon
Summary: You decide to be a gigantic asshole.
Warnings: 18+. NO SMUT. SOMETHING INTERESTING! A tale so wildly thought-provoking and erudite that even its most vocal detractors must admit…it’s real different.
You were sick of seeing sex.
All the fanfiction you’d read of late? Perfunctory. Uninspired. Never mind the fact that these stories were being shared with you completely free of charge, at the writers’ own leisure, on a platform that didn’t pay in any way, shape, or form. Did I mention this shit cost $0.00?
Anyway, you’d decided to take it upon yourself that day to be a gigantic fucking asshole to one lowly writer in particular, so you pulled out your laptop and got to work.
Joel strolled into the room, sipping his beer.
“What’cha doin’, sweetheart?” he asked.
He leaned in to greet you with a kiss on the cheek, but you just swatted his touch away, too focused on the task at hand—How to be a Gigantic Fucking Asshole 101.
“Go away. I’m being insufferable online,” you snapped.
“Well, damn,” Joel said, scratching the back of his neck. “That sucks. What’s pissing you off so much, anyway?”
“This writer writes smut. Just…smut! So monotonous.”
“What, you don’t like to see us fuck?” Joel smirked.
“Well, I do, but…” you began to say, only to trail off into a blank, inane stare. You shook your head as if to clear it of the stupidity, but it was a fruitless endeavor. You were dumb as shit. “I just think their writing’s boring! There’s nothing thought-provoking to it! Just sex, sex, sex, sex!”
“Have you ever considered getting a job?” Joel asked.
“No, I enjoy being a spineless sack of shit who airs my grievances through anonymous mediums too much!”
“Oh, that makes sense,” he said. “What else?”
“And…and it’s not fair to me to read boring stuff!”
“Have you tried scrolling past their stories, maybe?”
“No. Again, I’m too fucking stupid to give that one a try. I’d much rather speak my piece to the writers online!”
Joel nodded in understanding. He heaved a sigh.
“Well, in that case…” he started, sitting down to place a hand on your shoulder and give you a firm, fuck-you look. “Maybe you should save the energy it took to type out a message to this writer, take your head out of your ass, and remember that these people owe you nothing. It makes you look like a gigantic fucking asshole when you send messages like these, denigrating the work they’ve decided to share online for free. I can assure you, the sentiment you’ve expressed in these lines will serve only to alienate the person whose writing you’re targeting. It’ll piss them off and discourage them from ever wanting to share a story online again. So before you get to typing out another one of these stupid fucking messages again, ask yourself: Am I being a Gigantic Fucking Asshole?”
I am exceptionally lucky in that my parents never hit me, grounded me, confiscated my things, banned me from my hobbies or threatened any of these actions to make me behave as a kid. as an adult it has made me realise how very very long a road most people have to traverse before they can take a statement like 'no rule that must be enforced by threat is legitimate' seriously.
I really do mean this sympathetically. we are not well equipped as a culture to grapple with the implications of power and violence, because we are intimately saturated in it from birth. cruelty feels natural, and that's hard to unlearn.
a bunch of things that I know are going to sound really corny (which honestly I think is half the cultural problem - the idea that non-coercive parenting is touchy-feely, ineffectual or just kind of cringe - but that could be a whole other post)
the main thing was that they always explained things to me. if I wanted something I couldn't have, they explained why (from 'we can't afford that', 'it's bad for you', 'it's dangerous', all the way up to 'it's made by a big company that treats its workers badly, and we don't want to give them money'). If I threw a tantrum, they either waited it out until I got tired and bored or they redirected what we were doing ('we have to be patient and wait in line. if we don't wait in line, we can't go into the theatre. we can't wait in line if you scream and upset people. okay then, we're going home.')
beyond that, they always spoke to me like a full person. they asked my opinion on things and took it seriously, and asked me why as much as I asked them. apparently I had a phase as a toddler where I always wanted to be the first one on the swings / down the slide, and would throw almighty fits about it, until my mum took me aside one day and said 'why do you want to be first? are you worried the slide will get used up?' I laughed like it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard, and never kicked up a fuss about taking turns after that.
on the granular level, they focused on positives over negatives. My mum would draw little good behaviour charts for me, featuring e.g. me walking a long winding path through the woods with my soft toys. the path would be made up of, say, 30 stones, and every day that I was well behaved I'd earn a sticker on one of them. when I reached the end of the path, I got to pick a treat. something like a new plastic animal for my collection, or a day trip to the aquarium.
I do remember them sitting me down once and asking me to come up with what I thought would be an appropriate punishment if I ever did something really bad. I think my first suggestion was something like 'no TV', which was a real nice try because we didn't have a TV at the time. I don't remember what I finally decided on, it might have been 'no dessert for a week'. We wrote it down together and I signed my name, and they sealed it in an important looking envelope which they put in my dad's filing cabinet (for important documents). This would be unsealed if I ever did something Really Bad. the eventuality never came up, but the act of participating in the exercise kept me mostly on the straight and narrow. It's funny, the conceptual punishment itself wasn't even that bad. It was the seriousnes of the adult commitment I'd made to Behaving Well that did the trick.
When I DID do the standard naughty stuff, my parents would just sit me down and explain to me seriously why it was wrong and what impact it had caused for other people. They'd ask what motivated me, and why I acted on those feelings in that specific way. They would, of course, tell me they were disappointed. If necessary, they would tell me how things would have to change as a result of what I'd done. They were always, always open to hearing out my side of the story, and always, always took my feelings seriously even if they disapproved of my behaviour. they would ask if I was ready to say sorry and get a hug. if I wasn't ready, if I was still upset or angry, they would give me space in my room and ask me to come find them when I wanted to make up. and I always did, because I always knew they would accept it.
[ID: tags that read "really curious as to how your parents did get you to behave, as someone whose parents used every single one of those methods to 'discipline' us" /end ID]
heard someone say archive of our own should install a "dislike" button and I thought I should say this: no, there's absolutely no need for archive of our own to install a "dislike" button.
why? because archive of our own isn't tiktok or youtube or twitter/x where users can monetize their content. archive of our own is a nonprofit site run by fans for fans, which means every content — every fanfic — you see on archive of our own was made out of pure love and passion from the artists/authors.
ao3 authors write because writing about these characters is their happiness and passion. they write for themselves, but they were generous enough to share with you their creations.
they're not "content creators" the way tiktokers or youtubers or instagram models are. they don't "make content" for views and engagements that can be monetized.
so no, you don't get to "grade their works" unless they specifically and directly ask you to.
you don't get to "say what you dislike about their works" unless they specifically and directly ask you to.
you don't get to "dislike" works that are not made specifically to please you in the first place. you're just a guest in someone's house, a house in which they let you in because they were kind, you don't get to roam around their house and say what you dislike about their furniture. you don't get to roam around their house and say you "dislike their house".
of course, you can have your opinion about the house its host invites you in. but if it's a negative one and you find yourself not liking the house, the polite things for you to do is excuse yourself and leave without telling them you dislike their house.
and just because you personally dislike the house doesn't mean the house is "ugly" either. the house you dislike could be a favorite, most luxurious place to many others.
my point is, don't be entitled by wanting the rights to voice your disapproval of things that you get to enjoy for free. don't be entitled by wanting the rights to voice your disapproval of things that were made out of love and passion — things the artists made for themselves for fun.
it makes you look like an entitled jerk with main character syndrome. the universe does not revolve around you.
now repeat after me: don't like don't read. no one forces you to continue reading a fic you don't like. quietly leave instead of being rude to authors who write for free because writing is their source of comfort.
people are so used to contents that were made because it's a trend / contents like tiktok that were made with the main purpose of reaching high engagement and making profits that they forget sometimes things can be made out of love and be made just for fun. sometimes things are supposed to just be for people to enjoy, and if some people don't enjoy them, then they can simply leave without being unnecessary unkind.
And people really do try to interact with fandom like consumers! They want « content ». They act like they can get a refund on reading a fic they don’t like. They add fanfics to goddamned goodreads without a second thought without realizing that’s as ridiculous as adding your friend’s dining room as a restaurant on yelp just so you can post a review about it
