I lost my balance

When I needed it most. ((IC vent, password protected. multiple triggers present, hopefully tagged.))

[pridefulsuggestion]

hold faith. you are not a casualty yet.

[existential-celestial]

[fairycosmos]

if something fundamental in me wasn’t missing i would be so fun to be around

[magpie-to-the-morning]

I don’t WANT a career. I want to cuddle and sleep and eat and read and create and love and be loved.

[omar-little]

how was the destroying and betraying yourself for nothing was the destroying and betraying yourself for nothing fun? it didn't look fun

[dateamonster]

by the fourth or fifth time you "come back wrong" no ones even impressed anymore

[fairyinthetrees]

you ever feel like you’re more work than you’re worth? oh yeah no me neither

[crazysodomite]

guy who only experienced torture: this reminds me of the torture i went through

guy who only experienced torture: i don't like this because it's too unlike the torture

guy who only experienced torture: i'm afraid of not being tortured

[phenomignitionsanduncertainties]

how to escape the terrible fatigue guide

[phenomignitionsanduncertainties]

escape the terrible fatigue walkthrough no commentary

[northirish]

Stop doing it scared and start doing it scary. Invoke sheer eye-clawing terror into all those who have ever wronged you

[fadingember]

@ssunspoiled hi i see your tags. pardon?

[fadingember]

its hard 'cause like. everyone(tm) just sort of expects me to know how much they care. how could i believe they dont? but then (for example) theyll go months without speaking to me, and be aghast that it makes me think they don't care. and if it happens sometimes thats fine but like.

i dunno. thinking about patterns.

thinking also especially about people who like, never earn that trust that they care. and then get so, so angry that you think they'd be cruel, when they have not been especially kind and havent bothered to hear you out on their perceived cruelty beyond punishing you for being hurt.

thinking about who i let into my life and that i should probably be much more selective than i used to be. and that scares me, because i am already often so lonely. i feel so unseen even by those who love me, so often, and i just. i dont know.

[vexheart]

[decision]

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

tbh the first step of recovery is to stop feeling kind of proud about how fucked up you are. your martyr complex is not an endearing quirk it’s the fatal flaw that makes your friends feel like garbage and will sabotage your whole life.

[mothprincess]

don’t forget that it’s your life. it’s not school’s life, it’s not work’s life, it’s not your family or your partner’s life—it’s perpetually your life, for better or worse. what do you want from this life? forget happy, what motivates you to live? why are you here?

[peanut-jelly]

lately ive been bedridden with a terrible case of i dont wanna