I am begging you all to understand what is happening during the Vegas bathroom scene.
the reason shane folds so easily is that he doesn't think he should be upset with ilya in the first place. if he's thinking about it logically—which he is trying very hard to do!—then he thinks ilya is doing the smart thing by staying away. that six months of no contact? the correct move! from Shane's objective perspective. but he's not obejctive about ilya. and he is upset. so then he's also upset with himself for being upset with ilya in the first place. because he thinks he shouldn't be! what the two of them have going on is a very bad idea! and if they talk about it at this point, the conclusion will be that they should stop. so they don't talk. because neither of them can walk away from the other. they are down horrendous and they don't. know. what. to do about it. because they cannot have a relationship. that is what they believe at the core of it. this thing between them is impossible. and yes, they are hurting each other, but they are also hurting themselves. and they know it! but they'll take what they can get! like everyone thinks it's just Shane taking what he can get from ilya, but it works both ways! ilya is also taking what he can get from shane.
I cannot stress this enough—by following shane into that bathroom, ilya. breaks. first. some of you are forgetting about the very specific nature of their situation and how impossible they believe it to be. they literally cannot see an alternative to what they currently have going on. and so the constant push and pull isn't just happening between them, it's happening internally. they are constantly, CONSTANTLY telling themselves to walk away. so when the other pulls back, they're like yeah! smart move, my man, I wish I had the strength! except neither of them can actually maintain that distance because neither of them really does have the strength. they are so catastrophically down bad! they are sick with the wanting. it is killing them. which is how they end up hurting each other and themselves so badly.
