firesandfamily

fuck fascism, fuck ICE, fuck jkr support each other Just my own personal chaos (She/her), 30

[1410-1221-dec2008]

[thesixthstar]

they should invent a secret second weekend so that you can see friends and do fun things while still having enough time to do errands and sleep in without dying of exhaustion all the time

[lookataleaf3000]

i always think about that study where they had adults hold a baby, and when they were told the baby was a girl the adults said she was cute and small, and when they were told the baby was a boy they said he was big and strong. they rated the baby’s ability to do things and tendency towards certain toys differently. they even held the baby differently. (x) or when they rated the baby’s physical ability to do various tasks such as climbing up a slope differently, (x) & when they measured how much parents told their girl children vs. their boy children to be careful and stop being so rowdy (x), & when they measured how often girls and boys were told to be quiet. (x) this was, obviously, all unconscious behavior in the adults. they’re not all like, raving sexists who outspokenly believe that women can’t do stuff or that girls really should just be quieter, be more still than boys. like its not even counting the direct, actual messages, its just literally how every single person in your entire life treats you, and if asked they would probably deny that its even because you’re a girl. how the fuck am i supposed to believe this doesn’t affect a child’s development when its literally constant throughout the entire process 

[puttingherinhistory]

This shit starts as soon as early as when someone’s still a fucking fetus. I’ve heard the saying “discrimination starts as soon as you leave the womb” but it actually starts earlier than that.

[1boringblueboy]

GoddAMN I am so sick of genders

[zylaa]

“Delusions of Gender” by Cordelia Fine goes over all this in lots of detail if you want to be REALLY infuriated (and educated!)

[adventures-in-a-world-of-fiction]

Reblogging to second that book recommendation. Delusions of Gender covers a lot of scientific studies into perceived gender differences in children and adults - things like the study of children climbing a slope reference by OP, but also things like men being better at spacial reasoning than women. It asks the question of whether these differences are innate and natural or taught to us by society from a young age. From the title, I think you can guess where the author landed on this question.

[rhube]

endlessly frustrating.

Fuck gender.

[misanthropemom]

“Oh, I know it’s gonna a (whatever) cuz she’s carrying high/low” - dude, you don’t even have to be showing before that shit starts.

[easilycherished]

I don’t think we talk enough about how “I could marry svetlana” is ilya offering shane an out

a core ilya tenant (to me) is The Only Person Responsible for Ilya Rozanov is Ilya Rozanov — not only does ilya not expect anyone to take care of him, he sees it as solely his responsibility and will never in any way expect another person to care for him or support him or help him solve his problems

so when ilya raises marrying svetlana as a solution for his immigration anxieties yes he’s testing the waters and trying to gauge shane’s level of commitment yes he’s creating the circumstances to express his own level of desire but crucially he’s doing it by offering a solution to his problem that is entirely disconnected from shane

(so disconnected in fact that it even keeps him physically distanced from shane - he had already raised the idea of transferring to canada! marrying svetlana would keep him in the us, keep the status quo they were already working with)

he’s saying “I can solve this myself, you don’t need to help me, you’re under no obligation, I don’t have to be your problem”

which makes shane’s midnight response all the more stunning and loving and meaningful for ilya

not only did shane try to help and work towards a new idea — which in and of itself is a revelation for ilya — even more so shane’s solution isn’t just one that he came up with and can now hand off to ilya to use: it’s a plan that requires shane’s involvement, his work and commitment and care and support

shane is probably the first person* in 15 years to reject ilya’s offer to handle things himself, the first person since his mother died to say “no don’t handle this alone, I want to do it with you”

*re: svetlana I have many thoughts but the tldr is that she loves him very deeply and always has his back no matter what but also their relationship is such that her support is for actions he's already thought of or is already taking and she won’t push to help if he says he has something handled

[lavenderprose]

I know we’ve talked about this before but the retroactive realization for Shane Hollander that Ilya has been his future husband the entire time must have sent that boy spinning. What do you mean I introduced myself to my future husband. What do you mean my husband was there standing beside me the day I got drafted. What do you mean I jerked off to thoughts of my husband on the most important day of my entire life up to then. What do you mean my husband took my virginity. My husband and I watched each other grow up. My husband and I fell in love for the first time together. My husband was my first ex. My husband has been the most consistent, sensual, irritating, understanding, solid, loving presence in my entire life. Since I became a man, the thoughts I have reached for to comfort myself or bring myself pleasure have been those of my husband. I memorized the moles on my future husband’s body before I fully understood the wants and needs of my own. My husband taught me how to pleasure a man by pleasuring me. The first person I willingly came out to was my husband. My friends have NEVER known me at a time in my life when I was not in love with my husband.

[queerspacepunk]

not to be all "these two words will change your life" or whatever, but I promise you, programming in "good catch!" as your response to people correcting you/pointing out errors or whatever removes so much friction from interactions, and comes with a delightful happy meal toy of "not hating yourself so much for making mistakes"

[madgastronomer]

I use "I stand corrected" a lot. The mild silliness of the outdated language makes it work for me.

[knitmeapony]

I had a high school science teacher who would say "if you admit you're wrong and change your mind..." and the whole class would respond back "... you aren't wrong anymore!"

And when a kid would assert something incorrect In class, he wouldn't tell them they were wrong, he would help lead them to the right answer and then when they admitted/ accepted the new information, he'd say "now we're both right! Nice work!"

For a bunch of gifted kids whose identity and reputation often was staked on knowing more than most people, it was a great safety valve. No shame in making a mistake, because if you accept it you have learned! Now you are smarter! It always made me feel better.

[tcnm-on-tmblr]

Obsessed with this touch.

The way Ilya oh-so-gently nudges Shane into reaching for him, which then immediately turns into to the hug Shane clearly needs, but he still let's Shane take that step on his own and I just 😭😭😭

[finelytaylored]

he was down SO BAD IMMEDIATELY

[blacksheepcolorfulskin]

WHY IS THIS SO GOOD?!

[iceouthr]

ICE OUT - Donations Open Feb 1st-14th!

Heated Rivalry ICE OUT is now open for donations until Feb. 14th!

How it works:

Donate to one of our supported nonprofits

Submit the donation form

Get a gift from a Heated Rivalry creator

There are different donation tiers that give you access to different gift request perks. Details in the carrd: iceouthr.carrd.co

[firesandfamily]

Supporting immigrant and refugee communities is very near and dear to my heart. It’s so nice, during this difficult time, to see the fandom stepping up to provide support. I hope you’ll consider donating (and then receiving a fanwork gift!)

[aslongasitsblack]

whoever first pointed out that ilya americanises his accent around other people but not around shane i owe you my fucking life

also the idea of like when its just the two of them ilya can like just slip back into the more comfortable rudimentary accent he had at the start of their relationship :’) and that in itself being nostalgic for shane :’)

[tteukbyeol]

this would also be linguistically accurate!

i speak english the most in day to day life and also think in english sometimes. my accent in english is americanized, pretty indistinguishable from a native (excluding sets of certain phonemes like /rl/) .

but if i’m really tired or spending time just around my wife (with whom i speak english), i sometimes switch to what i call ‘lazy english’.

what this usually consists of is i allow myself to speak english with the russian /r/ phoneme that is more natural for me, i drop articles, replace continuous and future tense with simple present, use the ‘….,yes?’ construct, avoid contractions (bc the verb ‘to be’ is dropped/implied in russian, so contractions aren’t always natural)

for example, when i’m in ‘lazy english’ mode, this is how my speech varies:

‘i’m making the bed’ = ‘i make bed’.

‘you’ll help me later, right?’ = ‘you help me later, yes?’ (for this one, in russian, the same phrasal construct ends with the word ‘yes’ instead of the word ‘right’)

‘can you give me a tissue?’ = can you give me tissue?’

‘where’s the pen? do you have it?’ = ‘where is pen? you have?’

if you pay attention, you’ll notice that a lot of these patterns also occur in ilya’s speech, especially earlier on. that’s why i’m particularly impressed with the writing of his dialogue — it doesn’t come across as stereotyping/caricatural because the way he speaks english is consistent with russian linguistic/grammatical rules. this is often how russian-speaking people speak english when it is their second language and they’re still learning.

i like to imagine ilya reverting to ‘lazy english’ or speaking in a similar manner to me around shane. it is linguistically consistent and a sign of comfort/deep familiarity with the person.

[ariaste]

The next layer of linguistic accuracy would be for Shane to start occasionally modulating down into a similar "lazy english" that's reflective of Ilya's style. I forget the technical term for this, but it's a legit thing in linguistics -- if there's someone you love/admire/respect and you spend a lot of time with them, you unconsciously start picking up and mirroring a couple aspects of their idiolect (like a dialect but rather than being spoken by a group, it is a single person's unique linguistic fingerprint), whether that's gestures, vocabulary, or speech patterns.

So when Ilya says something like, "Where is pen? You have?" then over time Shane's response might naturally shift towards, "Yes, I have."

[aslongasitsblack]

he already does this!!!

you still want?

i still want

!!!!!!

[justalurkr]

Nicked from Facebook:

Advice from protesters from the 60s/70s:

It would be a shame if the protesters began making their signs out of quarter-inch-thick plywood to stop rubber bullets, forming a tight shield wall to prevent police from singling out and mobbing individual protesters. It would be a shame if the people behind the shield wall held up umbrellas so that tear gas canisters fired over their heads on the front line will be bounced away. It would be a shame if protesters began constructing improvised armor vests out of duct tape, hard-backed books, and ceramic tiles.

It would be a shame if protesters started wearing safety glasses, hard hats, respirators, and gardening gloves, all of which can be found at the same hardware stores as the plywood. It would be a shame if they started using traffic cones (the kind without the hole in the top), upside down buckets, or other improvised lids to contain teargas by placing them over the canisters.

It would be a shame if protesters learned that police scanners are legal to own in the US, allowing them to learn where police are moving, and what routes they intend to take. It would be a shame if they discovered that these scanners can be used to send as well as receive, allowing them to flood the scanner frequencies with noise.

All of this would be a terrible, terrible shame.

*It would be an awful shame if you copied and pasted this, so that they couldn't delete the original and all linked posts (again).

**An even worse shame would be to start donating these items to protesters.

[mrshamill]

what a shame indeed.

[therozanov]

HEATED RIVALRY 1.02

[saffrondawn]

#THIS WAS A FUCKING ROOOOOMAAAAAAANCE moment #one of those moments when i knew jacob tierney Got the genre #bc this look of conflict and desire and the fact that shane CANNOT SEE IT #it's that and the big spiel in russian where it's like... this is why dual POV in a romance is so important and 9/10 times the better choic #(w exceptions!) #if you're a perceptive audience member (and not everyone is lol) you can tell that shane is not getting the full picture #you know that ilya's feelings are real and intense #but shane not knowing and YOU knowing makes the tension even better (tags via @mermaidsirennikita)

[fandomtrumpshate]

which nonprofits will you support in the 2026 FTH auction?

Creator signups for FTH2026 will open later today (January 26th), but for now we wanted to share a compilation of the detailed profiles we've written for each of this year's supported organizations. You can find the full list linked here; links to each individual detailed profile are below. (Also, here's a link to the full FTH 2026 calendar in case this crosses your dash after January 26th.)

Advocates 4 Trans Equality

Center for Countering Digital Hate

Disability Law United

Environmental Integrity Project

Freedom to Read Foundation

Gaza Soup Kitchen

Global Project Against Hate and Extremism

Greenlight America

In Our Own Voice: National Black Women's Reproductive Justice Agenda

National Immigrant Justice Center

Never Again Action

Open Secrets

VoteBeat

Umbrella: anti-poverty direct aid groups

[mybelovedmoon]

if you are a fandom creator and want to do something to help immigrants and people of color (or many other marginalized groups, of course, but many people are rightfully focused on immigrants and BIPOC) within the US right now, FTH is an excellent opportunity to do so. use the skills you have! offer your services to create a custom work, and all proceeds go to one of the above nonprofit organizations. you can offer fanfiction, fanart, beta reading, britpicking, gifsets, and more. and this is NOT a marauders fandom event. this is an ALL FANDOM EVENT.

[truegenius]

hollanov x still into you

[sexaftersunrise]

Svetlana knows that Jane is a man but also she definitely 100% knows it's Shane, and the more I think about it the funnier it gets.

Like she knows that Ilya gets weird when she brings up Hollander. And she knows that he watched that documentary about his house (maybe she even knows he watched it more than once). I bet she's caught the occasional interesting word on his phone screen when she's been over his shoulder, too.

But most importantly, she's obsessed with hockey. You know she watches every one of Ilya's games. You KNOW she's seen him and Shane glancing at each other and watched the way they interact, and you better believe she clocked when they were decidedly NOT glancing at each other and both playing like absolute shit.

[k-pepp]

Can we talk about this part again? The whole scene is gold, but I keep focusing on the first 40 seconds. Ilya is not usually shown to be an anxious person, but he does have little tells that he repeats throughout the show. And in this scene, he does all of them. His anxiety in the beginning of this scene is palpable. At first you see him nervously scanning the bar, knowing at any second he could see Shane. He's doing his usual self-soothing behaviors like fidgeting with his thumbs (like during the interview with the all star game) and messing with his hair/ear (like on the couch with Shane).

Then the moment happens. He spots Shane. And, fuck, he's coming right for him. He takes a big deep breath, says a quiet little "okay" to get himself ready, and takes a giant chug of his beer that finishes the bottle. As soon as Shane sits down, he starts doing little head bobs to hype himself up for whatever conversation they're about to have. While he's thinking of something to say, his thumbs are rubbing the hell out of the empty beer bottle. Trying to rub that thing back into sand. After Shane orders the same beer that Ilya is having, he does a little nose sniff. The same nose sniff/nose tug move he makes throughout the series to show that he's totally definitely nonchalant about something that's happening with Shane. Ilya asks him about his ginger ale. He can't help it. The last time they spent together is probably all he can think about. So Shane skipping his typical order and getting whatever Ilya has is throwing him off. But then. Shane makes a joke. A silly little 'Shane' joke that temporarily pulls Ilya out of his spiral and gets him to crack a smile. Very similar to the situation in episode 6 when Shane is spiraling and Ilya makes his "maybe he didn't even notice" joke.

After that the scene starts to shift and Ilya becomes visibly less and less anxious and more emboldened to take the lead of the conversation and openly ogle Shane. And Shane immediately ogles Ilya in return. They're BACK