leeches for sale

hi, my name is kel. they/them 💉

[resident-idiot-simp]

[pussyronin-deactivated20260120]

"like a boss" by lonely island was released ten thousand years ago when mammoths still roamed the big wide world. feel old yet?

[lesbianbloodritual]

No.

[bewbin]

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

[2006-honda-civic]

can i fucking help you?

[killerqueenmp3]

[laura-the-swarming]

My mans unlocked a higher level of synesthesia

[atomic-chronoscaph]

Elvira, Mistress of the Dark and Beer Wolf - Coors Light (1986)

[baaulp]

It's not fair

[powerburial]

[turing-tested]

Sorry am on lsd. Shouldn't have told you 2 eat a sandwich. That is your decision not mine. Sorry

this ask is so awesome. my favorite part is I can't find the other ask they're apologizing for.

[dazeylily]

[new to sadism] I'm gonna hurt the blood out of you

[sqooops]

[new to masochism] no 😦

[utopians]

duuuuuude you have GOT to come out tonight we're enacting cruelty upon those who have transgressed so badly that we can justify any act against them... and you KNOW we're interpreting our delight as moral righteousness... Yeah it's fucking crazyyyyyyy get an Uber

[lakemojave]

You don't like New Yawk? 🗽? Bada Bing?

[iamoutofideas]

no 🛩️

[transmechanicus]

anotha one🛩️

[fozmeadows]

Source

[naye-et-cetera]

[abimee]

[0v9]

seeing this image in 2026 is like seeing an old friend who I've dearly missed

[crowboy-bebop]

oh my fucking god

[qi-mera]

More of you need to learn about these ☝️

[jadenebula]

[nitrobishop]

this is still so funny. who the fuck were his sources

[strawberry-crocodile]

for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint

[strawberry-crocodile]

look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."

[fizzfags]

how it feels to wash your hair and brush your teeth and have clean clothes on

[doomdaysdecays-deactivated20251]

ooooo you wanna take a shower so bad

[vampireopossum]