Swag25 @flexbringer - Tumblr Blog

practicing self care less out of self love and more for the sheer logical reasoning of it’d be kinda stupid of me to expect myself to be able to function without proper maintenance

succubusboyfriend

“oh i don’t deserve rest and relaxation, i haven’t done enough, i haven’t earned it” and my car’s breaks don’t deserve break fluid because they aren’t breaking well enough to earn it. that’s what you sound like!!!!!

throathole

Oh thanks but what the fuck does any of that mean

anariel-the-elrond-apologist

I’ve seen quite a few of these in my time, but this one takes the cake.

throathole

This is fucking killing me

Golp: a roundel purpure.

Repeat this to yourself until it begins to have meaning

a-book-of-creatures

Okay then since some of you need to be reminded of this:

Roundels are circles in heraldry. They are named according to their color, which also has its own lingo. Let’s meet them!

Bezant: roundel or (gold) 🟡

Plate: roundel argent (silver) ⚪️

Torteau: roundel gules (red) 🔴

Pomme: roundel vert (green) 🟢

Hurt: roundel azure (blue) 🔵

Golp: roundel purpure (purple) 🟣

Pellet: roundel sable (black) ⚫️

If your field is strewn with roundels, you can describe it appropriately as being bezanty, hurty, golpy, and so on.

cognitohazardous

energyprison

Im sorry i know its bad to post screenshots of ads but unemployedprofessors.com is really getting me

sacred-portal

flexbringer

The day will come when we will have to do this

diet-soap

theyre adding the stinky meal to mcdonalds

palemysterysilhouette

nice 2 know mcmonalds made meal for you

campyvillain

theonion

beckybeckymarryme-deactivated20

mr. gorbachev…… hot box this car!!

listen2futurefunk-deactivated20

Bucket list: 1) smoke weed with 1D B) smoke weed with justin bieber 3) hot box the international space station

bisexual-engineer-girl

not to be all rose-tinted glasses on you but wasn't the internet cooler like 3 or 4 years ago

storm-of-feathers

this is what every mental health conversation on this god forsaken website sounds like to me.

czl

In American culture it is considered “bad luck” to leave the stove on when you’re not using it

loreleywrites

im always saying this

catboyaoi

Testosterone gives the biggest cocks to the most asexual soldiers

segamascott

biblicallyaccuratemoth

People will say that trans women are dangerous and then you meet one and she’s just some girl named Luna who hasn’t had a hug in twenty years

nuevocleo

And she has such a huge laundry list of talents she is too nervous to show publicly but will do some of the most magnificent work you've ever seen and still degrade herself out of habit.